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      How To Actually Get Better At Talking To Yourself

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      We’re all probably guilty of entertaining the negative voices in our heads in the midst of a situation where things aren’t exactly going our way. Whether you’ve missed a deadline on your assignment, dropped off the kids late for school, made a lacklustre supper or messed up a job interview, no situation is ever that grand for anyone to talk harshly to themselves.

      Ask yourself this question? How often are you polite to others as opposed to the number of times you bash yourself when things go wrong?

      “When it comes to our inner dialogue, a.k.a. self-talk, what we say to ourselves is often careless, critical, and even cruel. And while we may not think much of it, that self-talk is powerful and has more of an effect on our mental well-being than we realise,” explains psychologist Maya Rutstein, also a product architect for digital wellbeing platform, soSerene.

      Quick recap: Self-talk is the inner voice that houses the beliefs we hold about ourselves. It shapes our perception of the world and personal reality, therefore influencing our emotional, psychological and physical well-being.

      READ MORE: TV/Radio Presenter Rorisang Thandekiso On The Moments That Defined Her Path Forever

      The Origins Of Self-Talk

      “There are many factors that influence our inner voice during the course of our lives,” explains Rutstein. “It starts early on. Our past experiences and upbringing play a significant role in shaping what our inner voice sounds like. Interactions we have and feedback we receive early in life shape our self-perception into adulthood.” She adds that social comparisons play a major role, too.

      “When we compare ourselves to others and find ourselves wanting, this can lead to negative self-talk. Often this is exacerbated by social media, because we’re comparing our whole lives to carefully curated snapshots of other people’s lives,” says Rutstein.

      Cultural, societal and family expectations can also set standards that individuals strive to meet, influencing self-criticism or encouragement. For example, when family members expect you to have ticked off certain milestones (such as marriage, children or buying a house) by a certain age, you may start to feel like a failure if you haven’t met their expectations. Personal achievements and failures can directly impact self-talk, too, with successes boosting positive self-dialogue and failures often leading to negative self-talk.

      READ MORE: Enjoy Your Downtime (Without Feeling Guilty) In 3 Easy Steps

      Positive Self-Talk For The Win

      When self-talk is positive, it can have a wide range of positive effects on our lives – from how we feel to how we show up in the world. People with a positive inner dialogue tend to be more confident, more productive and happier. “Have you ever felt frustrated because someone with less technical ability than you got promoted and you didn’t? Or that someone else built a successful business off an idea that you also had but didn’t have the guts to pursue?” asks Rutstein. “That’s self-talk at work.”

      “Positive self-talk enhances mental well-being by reducing stress and anxiety and fostering a positive outlook on life. That optimism makes the other person believe that the business idea will be a success, making them more inclined to pursue it,” shares Rutstein. Positive self-talk also boosts self-confidence and self-esteem, empowering individuals to tackle challenges and pursue goals. Rather than being held back by self-doubt, the person believes that they are the one who should pursue the idea and turn it into a business.

      “Positive self-talk encourages resilience, enabling individuals to recover more quickly from setbacks and maintain motivation. This emboldens the person to take the risk of starting the business, because even if it doesn’t work out, they’ll bounce back and try something else. Positive self-talk can even improve physical health. It has been linked to lower stress levels, better immune function, and better overall wellbeing,” explains Rutstein.

      READ MORE: 18 Mental Health Books For Anxiety, People-Pleasing And More

      Why Negative Self-Talk Is A Definite ‘No’

      Unfortunately, as powerful as positive self-talk can be for improving the overall quality of our lives, negative self-talk can be just as powerful – but in a destructive way. Unchecked, it can lead to mental health issues such as chronic stress, anxiety, depression and low self-esteem, as well as exacerbate physical ailments.

      “Negative self-talk can result in a defeatist attitude towards goals and aspirations, hindering personal and professional growth. If you’ve ever given up on something before you even tried because you expected the worst, that was negative self-talk in action,” says Rutstein. She adds that it can also strain relationships by projecting insecurities and negativity onto interactions with others. “When you feel bad about yourself, you may enter social interactions defensively. This may cause you to misinterpret what other people say or do as an attack because that’s what you’re expecting,” says Rutstein.

      A classic example is when someone says, “You did well today,” but what you hear is, “You did well today for a change because you’re usually incompetent.” That, right there, is negative self-talk causing you to perceive a compliment as an insult.

      READ MORE: TikTok’s Loud Budgeting Trend Is What Your Wallet Needs In 2024, Say Financial Experts

      How To Show Up For Yourself

      Per Rutstein, if you typically engage in negative self-talk, the good news is that it’s totally possible to rewire your brain with these five easy steps:

      Practise mindfulness: Caught yourself feeling bad that the person on the treadmill next to you is running so much faster? Instead, think about how well you did by making it to the gym in the first place – and how many excuses could have held you back, but didn’t. Become aware of negative self-talk as it occurs. Acknowledge these thoughts without judgment and gently redirect your focus to more positive or neutral thoughts.

      Challenge your own negative thoughts: Question the validity of negative self-assessments and replace them with positive affirmations instead. Thinking about how you’re definitely going to mess up your job interview? Focus on all the reasons why you’re actually the best candidate for the position.

      Gratitude journalling: Regularly write down things you are grateful for or proud of about yourself. This can help shift focus from negative to positive aspects.

      Surround yourself with positive influences: Engage with supportive friends, family and content that uplifts you, reducing exposure to negativity that can feed into self-criticism.

      Set small, achievable goals: Accomplishing even little goals (making your bed every morning; not snoozing the alarm) can boost your sense of efficacy and foster a more positive dialogue about your capabilities and achievements.

      As a parting shot, we invite you to reflect on these words from author Brianna Wiest‘s book When You’re Ready, This Is How You Heal: “What if cleansing your mind with hopeful, joyful, positive thoughts is the rebalancing that’s been long overdue, after so many years of existing solely on the most negative interpretations you could come up with?” More

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      You can now visit La Prairie’s first longevity hub in Dubai

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      Life by Sarah Joseph 9 mins ago As embark on more wellness activities this year, One&Only One Za’abeel is now home to Clinique La Prairie’s (CLP) first Longevity Hub in the UAE. Born to address the daily stresses of urban living, the brand’s signature offerings include preventive medicine, nutrition, wellness and health. Visitors can opt for minimally invasive cosmetic procedures – including mesotherapy, hyaluronic acid, botox, laser and platelet-rich plasma – as well as Neuro Wave Stimulation, cryotherapy, far-infrared, IV drips, and immersive experiences that promote balance and a detox from the inside-out. This state-of-the-art facility features a dynamic surrounding which is spread over three floors within the complex, embodies a holistic approach through three interconnected pillars: longevity, well-being and aesthetics. The Hub comprises 29 rooms dedicated to treatments and therapies, along with a Movement Studio, gym facilities, a Longevity Bar and a Longevity Index lounge. “This partnership exemplifies the convergence of cutting-edge wellbeing practices and unparalleled luxury. In a world where the pursuit of longevity is often driven by trends and fads, we distinguish ourselves by offering exclusive, science-backed destinations,” said Simone Gibertoni, CEO of Clinique La Prairie. The Longevity Hub in the United Arab Emirates, the fifth of its kind, is a precious addition to a constellation of existing hubs in Madrid, Bangkok, Doha and Taipei. So, if you’re looking to get booked in visit oneandonlyresorts.com/one-zaabeel – For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram Images: Supplied & Feature Image: Instagram @ooonezaabeel More

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      Could Bed Rotting Be The Answer To Your Self-Care Struggles?

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      New Age, TikTok wellness trends will have you believe that everything your parents taught you about waking up early daily and making your bed is as irrelevant and outdated as a feature phone. Take for instance the latest fad: bed rotting (the tag has garnered more than 2 billion views on TikTok)!

      Ever had those weekend episodes where your eyes are wide awake (yay, new day!), but your body tells you that it doesn’t feel like leaving the bed. So, you end up eating, reading, catching on the latest season of Love Is Blind, taking calls, mindlessly browsing the rabbit hole that is the ‘net – all from comfort of your bed! Yep, you may have done this a couple of times already but thanks to GenZers redefining life as we’ve always known it via TikTok, the trend now has a phrase. What you call being consciously unproductive your grandmother may call pure laziness – but however you see it, let’s delve deeper into what ‘bed rotting’ a.k.a. ‘much-deserved rest’ entails – and how to do it right!

      READ MORE: 5 Reasons This Mauritius Holiday Is A Wellness Dream

      What You Do In Bed Matters

      Granting yourself a lazy day every once in a while is purely warranted and is no new concept. However, equally important is knowing when bed rotting is totally healthy and when it’s feeding into your existing mental health issues. “If, for instance, you’re already struggling with basic day-to-day functions and you’d rather sleep than face certain emotions head-on, sleeping or spending more time in bed could signal depression and other mood disorders,” explains counselling psychologist Selloane Molalogi-Makau, adding that if you’re constantly feeling lethargic and feel safer spending time in bed than anywhere else, perhaps it’s time to seek professional help.

      If, however, there is nothing alarming about your behaviour and you function just as well when you’re not cooped up in bed, Molalogi-Makau, suggests setting time limits to how much time you’re going to spend ‘bed rotting’ could be a good idea. For instance, are you going to use that time catching up on to-do list items that you didn’t get to in the week or are you immersed in a book whose storyline literally transports you to another world?

      “Just be careful not to indulge in anything that could upset you, stress you out or make you feel like your bed is safer than being out there in the world,” warns Molalogi-Makau.

      A February 2023 study by the University of Bath found that “long-term inactivity significantly increases blood sugar levels even if you reduce your food intake to avoid gaining weight.” While another pilot study published in the National Library of Medicine found that there was a correlation between “sleeping or lying in bed all day and an increased risk of stress and depression, systemic inflammation and other psychological and cardiovascular ailments.”

      READ MORE: Banesa Tseki On How Yoga Gave Her A New Lease On Life

      Bed Rotting Done Right?

      Durban-based psychologist Lindani Mnyaka believes that there’s nothing sinister with bed rotting – provided it’s done once in a blue moon, as opposed to regularly. He does, however, add that nothing adds meaning to our lives such as kicking that duvet cover and being up and about creating a life of meaning. He also highlights the importance of constantly checking in one’s mental health state, so as to avoid sinking into a mood disorder without being aware of it.

      Changing your sleep schedule drastically ultimately does more harm than good for your mental and physical health, says Mnyaka. Per a 2019 Harvard Health report, “too much sleep can lead to too little energy.” Why is that? “Because it appears that any significant deviation from normal sleep patterns can upset the body’s rhythms and increase daytime fatigue,” according to the report. That said, Mnyaka agrees with Molalogi-Makau re: setting a limit to how much time time you’re going to spend in bed, as well as mapping out exactly what you’ll be doing.

      Among some of the activities he suggests are reading, watching a series, colouring in, sewing in buttons (time to own a sewing kit!) or a catch-up video call with a loved one. “It’s also very important to mention that just because a health trend has attracted billions of views doesn’t necessarily make it a healthy solution. People really need to start scrutinising

      READ MORE: 20 Fitness Apps To Kickstart Your Wellness Journey

      A Problematic Title, Maybe?

      Perhaps worth asking is – why is resting referred to as rotting, when the former is actually a good thing (and especially when self-care/resting comes in many forms? What’s self-care to one person may not work for another individual and such is the case with many subjective practises. TikTokers are probably rolling their eyes this very minute and thinking – what’s in a name, anyway? If there’s anything that we should take away from the bed rotting trend, it’s that aimless and unplanned rest – especially in a culture that praises busyness over relaxation – is completely healthy and okay. We’re allowed to take care of ourselves, the best way we know how. More

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      9 products to add to your wellness routine for a complete detox

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      Beauty

      by Sarah Joseph
      3 hours ago

      Has your body lately been in overdrive with non-stop phone calls, longer hours at the office and unfathomable deadlines?
      If you are looking for a way to transform your body with a healthy boost, then certain products can help enhance the process.
      From hair to skin, each product aims to help individuals to feel better both inside and out. Overall, It’s a tradition we revisit every January not only because it helps us reset, but because it sets the intention for the rest of the year.
      So swipe through the guide to see all the editor-approved picks that has so many of us are turning to detox products to recharge.

      – For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
      Images: Supplied & Feature Image: Instagram @haileybieber More

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      TV/Radio Presenter Rorisang Thandekiso On The Moments That Defined Her Path Forever

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      TV/Radio broadcaster and speaker Rorisang Thandekiso’s biggest turning point came in Grade 8. Vocal from a very young age, Rorisang often got into trouble for being too opinionated or mediating a fight between classmates, for instance. “So much so that the principal called me Winnie Mandela. My mother would get called in because I talked a lot,” she recalls.

      The ‘talking’ started affecting her marks via the school’s demerit system, where for every wrongdoing, points would be deducted from the learner’s final year mark. “At the end of Grade 4, I received two report cards – one with my actual marks, where I’d passed, and one where the demerit points had been deducted and I’d failed. The school went with the latter report card, meaning I had to repeat the Grade 4.”

      READ MORE: How One Woman Overcame Diet Pill Addiction And Reclaimed Her Life

      Nothing But A Minor Hurdle

      Livid, Rorisang’s mother wanted to take her daughter out of the school, to which her grandfather advised: “Don’t, it will shrivel her up forever!” That year, Rorisang repeated Grade 4 and vowed to keep silent, which killed her confidence and made her feel as though there was something innately wrong with her. 

      Fast-forward to Grade 8…Rorisang’s English teacher would always sing her praises on just how well she narrated stories and carried out her class presentations. “That year, he encouraged me to enter the English Olympiad competition that was actually meant for Grade 11 and 12 learners. I won and we only declared afterwards that I was, in fact, in Grade 8,” she shares, adding that in that moment a light bulb went on in her head. 

      READ MORE: 10 Wellness Quotes By Miss SA Natasha Joubert (That We Absolutely Loved!)

      Feeling Seen

      “Winning the English Olympiad competition made me feel seen and reaffirmed that there had been nothing wrong with me throughout primary school. The competition celebrated me for having an opinion. All of a sudden everything that I loved – engaging, debating and trying to change the world through my opinions – suddenly had a place to live,” she enthuses. 

      As a result of wanting to be an agent of change, Rorisang studied International Relations after matric. And even though she didn’t get to change the world through championing policies – being cooped up in an office was just not for her – she did find another platform when the yesteryear children’s TV show YOTV headhunted her. This, after seeing her making waves locally and internationally through her debating engagements.

      “At 18, my first presenting gig was a show called Blue Couch, which dealt with the more serious stuff – and I later started producing it. This was the beginning of a broadcast career that has spanned nearly 20 years.” 

      READ MORE: DJ And Fitness Trainer Miss Bee On Crafting A New Life After Surviving Cancer

      Staying Power

      The secret to her longevity is from another lesson she learnt while waitressing as a teen. “I worked at a restaurant where Tata, one of the chefs, would always encourage me to arrive at work early so he could show me how the kitchen operates. He wanted me to get the complete picture of how a restaurant functions,” she says. Tata taught her a valuable lesson: “In any place, the most knowledgeable and impactful people are usually behind the scenes – and are often the most disregarded,” he said. This lesson guides Rorisang to this day. 

      “I’ve learnt that no one is beneath me. There can never be anything that makes me feel too important. Many of my work opportunities come through ordinary people. Therefore, there can never be anything that makes me feel too important. Fame, for me, is a weird concept,” she concludes.  

      Parting Shot

      I could never live without…God. I’m fully dependent on Him and it’s the one relationship I cannot compromise on. The things people enjoy about me – be it TV, radio or an MCing gig – I pull them from God. Family has also been my biggest source of support.

      One thing most people don’t know about me is that…I only watch Nollywood films and K-Drama series. So much so that I usually get into trouble when I meet local personalities that I’m supposed to know [chuckles].

      What I hope to build more of in 2024 is…I’d like to zone in more on my ‘speaking’ era. I really want to travel the world with my speaking engagements.

      This article originally appeared in the Jan/Feb 2024 edition of Women’s Health SA. More

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      How One Woman Overcame Diet Pill Addiction And Reclaimed Her Life

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      Monique Eloff has regained control of her body and eating habits and is now South Africa’s own Supreme Queen Global Earth Africa. But when she was 18, a bad breakup saw her struggling with diet pill addiction. Here, she tells her story to inspire and educate other women about the dangers of weight loss pills and how she regained control of her body – and eating habits.

      The impetus

      For four years, Monique had been battling with her weight and was trying to shed unwanted kilos. In 2005, when Monique was 18, a heartbreaking break-up sent her into depression and she tried to regain control by becoming fixated on losing weight. “My addiction started after going through a major relationship breakup and my inability to deal with the pain, the loss, the rejection and feelings of ‘not being wanted’,” Monique reflects. “I became obsessed with losing weight.” Monique visited a dietician but it didn’t work, mostly, Monique thought, because of a hormone imbalance caused by prolonged chronic stress that threw things out of whack in her body.

      The beginning of a diet pill addiction

      Thereafter, Monique tried an endocrinologist, but her treatment was expensive and she opted out.

      It was around this time that Monique discovered weight loss pills. “I was introduced to a substance called ephedrine. In year one, I mixed ephedrine with cayenne pepper to make my own weight-loss tablets,” she says. “That worked really well. I started to lose weight and I experienced increased energy levels and I also experienced higher performance at varsity and even better grades in my studies.” Unfortunately, Monique started building up a tolerance to the drugs and needed more to keep losing weight. To get there, she turned to ephedrine in its purest form. “At certain points, I even refined it for snorting,” she confesses.

      “One thing led to another. I could not sleep because of the adrenaline rush effect one gets using ephedrine. Then, I started taking sleeping tablets at night. I could not eat, because ephedrine is a potent appetite suppressant and I battled with fatigue and in turn, balancing my studies and my part-time work became extremely difficult. I was already on my way to complete burnout. My ability to cope, concentrate and perform was diminished,” she says.

      READ MORE: 10 Wellness Quotes By Miss SA Natasha Joubert (That We Absolutely Loved!)

      The turning point

      There were signs of the diet pill addiction that others could see – but she couldn’t. For one, she had limited self-control, talked a lot and experienced severe reactions to stress.

      On the inside, Monique was privy to extreme thirst, heart palpitations and shakiness. She felt depressed, anxious and sensitive. “Ephedrine certainly kept the weight off but the weight of the addiction literally crushed the life out of me and it left me feeling a great deal of shame, guilt and regret,” she says.

      Added to that, she was experiencing gastrointestinal disorders, mood swings and shortness of breath. Her central nervous system was beginning to shut down and Monique was forced to get help. “I had no choice; my body made the decision for me,” she says. In 2007, Monique was hospitalised and underwent treatment.

      READ MORE: Author Janine Jellars Shares Her Simple Wellness Routine

      The change

      “I received treatment that was aimed at opening up the receptors in my brain in order for the normal flight or fight response mechanisms to start functioning again,” Monique explains. “My body experienced inefficiencies in secreting adrenalin, serotonin and other key hormones. I had a complete imbalance in my body.”

      With treatment, Monique slowly started to improve, but the road to healing was long. “Diet and sleep played a crucial part in my recovery. I had to teach my body what a normal healthy intake of food consisted of and looked like, at frequent and consistent intervals,” she says. “Over time my mood and concentration levels improved. I could literally feel balance coming back to my body, and it felt amazing. The toughest part was the realization of how far I’ve taken my addiction and the damage it has done. The impact it had on my loved ones. What I’ve lost in the process and the fact that I had to drop out of varsity in my third year. I felt like a complete failure. I think my mental scars outweigh the physical scars, and for me, the biggest battlefield was my mind.”

      READ MORE: Weight Loss Pills: We Delved Deep Into The Science To See If Any Actually Work

      The glow up

      Through all this, Monique feels that she’s grown a lot as a person. “My mess has become my message and today I get to tell my story unapologetically. I still have feelings of shame, guilt and regret; however, it shows that I am human and that it matters to me,” she says.

      Now, 16 years later, Monique is at a happy weight and is taking things further in her life, earning her spot as the reigning Supreme Queen Global Earth Africa for 2023. “My wounds have given me great wisdom,” she notes. “This journey on earth is all about unbecoming to become, letting go of the things that are no longer serving you well.” More

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      6 Energy-Boosting Hacks That Are Simple To Integrate

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      Tiredness is that feeling that we all seem to know a little too well. Perhaps it’s waking in the morning and desperately wanting to hit the beckoning snooze button. Or maybe it’s the feeling of that ominous 3pm slump, where our brain fog creeps in as our sugars dip post-lunch. Or perhaps it’s a more figurative feeling of tiredness; that you’re struggling to keep family, friends and yourself topped up, and that the demands of life and communication can feel at times exhausting. 

      Well, you’re not alone, with one of the most common complaints brought to clinicians cited as being tiredness. After all, if we aren’t functioning at our best, we often feel like we’re not committing fully to our work, enjoying life to the most and sleeping well. 

      So with that in mind, the happy news is that a few simple tweaks will pay great dividends. Get ready to be electrocuted into life. Here are 6 easy hacks. 

      Exercise 

      When you’re tired, exercise is usually one of the first things to be given the boot in favour of a lie-down. But people have caught on to the benefits of exercising to boost your energy – something which at first glance could be seen as an oxymoron. In fact, the folks at Harvard cited a study where sleep-deprived volunteers compared against three different interventions: caffeine, stair-climbing and placebo. Ultimately they found that just 10 minutes of exercise boosted participants’ energy levels far more than caffeine (50mg) did.

      Soak up some sunshine (safely) 

      Feel more energetic on a sunny day than you do on a cloudy one? There’s some science to it. One of the best-known benefits of sunlight is vitamin D, which contributes to immune health, bone health and hormone production. Some studies have also suggested an association between sunshine and serotonin production, which helps regulate mood, hunger, sleep, learning, memory and your libido—so it’s possible to for sunshine to provide a natural energy high. Just be sure to soak it up at times when the UV index is low and wear SPF 50+ on any exposed skin. 

      Refuel with fermentation 

      We’re all aware to the fact that gut health is incredibly important to our overall health, influencing our immune system, heart, brain, mood, skin, sleep and overall digestion. We call it our second brain for a reason – it impacts our body overall in significant ways. So to keep our gut healthy it’s important to eat prebiotics and probiotics, limit processed foods and alcohol, drink plenty of water and minimise stress. A great place to start? Ferments. The likes of kimchi, sauerkraut, kefir, tempeh, natural non-flavoured yoghurt, miso and kombucha are your first ports of call. 2,4,6,8. 

      Prep your snacks 

      Drink, sorted. But what about snacks?! When hunger strikes, reach for ones that will keep you fuller for longer. We’re talking protein, good fats and fibre. If you’re in the mood for an apple, why not slather some peanut butter over it to ensure a slower release of energy? Or if you’re feeling like you need a top-up, protein goes a long way, after all, it’s the most satiating macronutrient. We’re talking yoghurt, tuna, trail mix, hard boiled eggs, a slice of cheese – the list goes on.

      Also, there are studies to suggest that starting the day with a savoury breakfast will help you manage your blood sugars and stay fuller for longer – and more energetic – throughout the day. 

      Image by Freepik

      Stick to a wake-up time 

      If you’re sleeping in one or two days of the week to try to ‘catch up’ on some energy, it may actually be having the opposite effect. A growing body of research shows that waking up at the same time every morning can not only help you sleep better at night but make it easier to get out of bed in the morning. This is because the circadian rhythm is reinforced, and the body knows what to expect, knowing when to release melatonin (the hormone that induces sleepiness). 

      READ MORE: Struggle Sleeping? Here’s How To Create A Bedtime Routine, Per Experts

      Turn up your favourite tunes 

      Listening to music has been linked to a reduction in stress levels, as well as a rise in serotonin and dopamine. Of course, it helps if it’s music that you love, so try creating a playlist for your morning commute rather than relying on the radio. The combination of lower cortisol levels and mood-regulating neurotransmitters can provide an energy boost while promoting focus and motivation. 

      Consider a supplement 

      We know that vitamins and minerals are essential for our bodies to function at their best. They influence our metabolic pathways and support fundamental cellular functions. And studies have shown that supplementing with vital vitamins and minerals is highly likely to result in health benefits in the areas of physical and mental fatigue. 

      Carla Oates of The Beauty Chef had some interesting insights into supplements, too, stating that, “Certain herbs, such as astragalus, have been traditionally used in Chinese Medicine for years to promote energy levels and increase vitality.” 

      More Energy-Boosting Articles:

      The post article by Scarlett Keddie appeared first on Women’s Health Australia. More

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      Transformation Journey: Exercise Renewed My Self-Esteem And I’m Stronger Than Ever!

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      If you’re on a transformation journey, take heart from the stories of others who’ve been there. Here, Louné Maree details how she went from skinny – and unhealthy – to strong and happier than ever.

      The Starting Point

      On the 28th of March 2023, I underwent my fourth and final surgery with the skilled Dr Nerina Wilkinson, marking a pivotal moment in my transformation journey. The decision to undergo a double mastectomy in 2019, following a positive BRCA2 gene test and the heartbreaking loss of my mother to cancer in 2008, laid the foundation for my path to self-discovery.

      Before the surgery, my passion for fitness and self-care defined my active lifestyle. However, post-surgery, I faced the challenge of re-entering the gym amid a toxic relationship that left me feeling unworthy. Throughout this period, lacking the necessary support at home and facing delayed re-entry into exercise, I made the crucial decision to remove toxic individuals from my life and relocate. By the end of June, I made a bold decision to relocate to Hout Bay in Cape Town, embarking on a journey to rediscover myself.

      By then, my muscles had atrophied, leaving me merely skin and bone. My once-perky butt and solid physique were replaced by a reflection in the mirror that revealed protruding hip bones and a stark change in the texture of my thighs. I weighed just 55kg.

      READ MORE: How To *Actually* Lose Belly Fat With Diet And Exercise

      Trying something new

      Before embarking on this transformation journey, I practised intermittent fasting, restricting my eating window to after 9 at night for a year. However, a pitfall was overindulging during those moments, leading to unhealthy habits of going to bed and feeling bloated. My objective shifted towards a healthier approach, aiming to eat more frequently with smaller portions. It wasn’t until the end of November that I realized being skinny isn’t synonymous with being healthy. With the goal of achieving my best shape before turning 33, this journey is still ongoing. Every week brings progress, and I can feel myself growing stronger.

      By the end of November, I transitioned to heavier weight training, eliminating cardio to focus on muscle building rather than further weight loss. I incorporated whey protein and creatine into my diet, prioritizing protein, vegetables, and fruits.

      READ MORE: How One Personal Trainer Lost 30kg – And Kept It Off

      Success!

      Embarking on this transformation journey has been a solo endeavour, with the unwavering support of my sister, work colleagues, and friends. While I’ve always had a passion for exercise and fitness, this time around, it became a mental challenge. Some mornings, training before work meant conquering the temptation to hit the snooze button. Initially, even donning my gym clothes posed a challenge, but I recognized that once I started my workout, I was on a mission with unstoppable momentum. Surprisingly, cutting out sugar, alcohol and fast foods turned out to be the easiest part of this journey.

      I now maintain a robust and healthy weight of 60kg. Achieving this transformation spanned a dedicated five-month period.

      I experience increased energy, find daily tasks more manageable, and feel a new-found confidence in my physique. Building muscle has instilled in me a sense of strong willpower and improved mental well-being.

      READ MORE: How To Lose 1kg A Week: Safe & Healthy Exercise & Nutrition Tips

      Louné’s tips

      Get support

      “Begin by surrounding yourself with a supportive circle—I have a group of female friends I fondly call my cheerleaders. They uplift me during lows and celebrate my achievements.”

      Get an eating plan

      “Establish a well-balanced eating plan. As this gains momentum, consider joining a gym where like-minded individuals share your goals and energy. While setting personal fitness goals, always keep in mind that fitness is more than a goal; it’s a lifestyle.”

      Uplift yourself

      “I appreciate the concept of women empowerment. Recognizing our emotions, let’s uplift one another through genuine compliments on success and appearance, fostering self-confidence.” More