Wellness Advice

Subterms

    More stories

    • 100 Shares

      in health and weelbeing

      Author Janine Jellars Shares Her Simple Wellness Routine

      by

      Former magazine editor Janine Jellars wrote her debut novel When The Filter Fades six years ago as part of National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) in November 2017. Her aim? To write 1,667 words a day in order to complete a 50,000-word first draft manuscript within one month. More than anything, this was a creative challenge that she’d set out for herself.

      “After I left journalism, I spent less, and less time writing on a daily basis and felt alienated from that part of my identity. But, the beauty of writing is that it’s a craft and wellness practice and the only pre-requisite for calling yourself a writer is to sit at your laptop and get to writing,” she shares, adding that she wanted to explore the joy of writing and challenge myself in a different way. “So, I tried my hand at fiction.”

      READ MORE: Enjoy Your Downtime (Without Feeling Guilty) In 3 Easy Steps

      The Difference Between Writing Fiction and Non-Fiction

      I actually wrote When The Filter Fades before I wrote my first book The Big South African Hair Book, which I found a much more familiar and comfortable experience given that it was non-fiction, fact-based and an extension of reportage. With fiction, there’s obviously a lot of imagination involved, there’s research too, but there’s a lot of thinking things through, problem-solving the plot and speaking to myself out loud to feel if the dialogue sounds real and authentic.

      It also played with many of my anxieties – I had to push through procrastination, I constantly questioned why I was taking certain characters in certain directions, the characters deal with their own traumas and mental health challenges so there was also some excavation involved in the process.

      In terms of putting the book out into the world, the difference between fiction and non-fiction was night and day. With The Big South African Hair Book, given that it was non-fiction, it could be fact-checked, the messaging was very clear. When The Filter Fades was so different for me – it’s so open to interpretation and governed by the audience’s likes and dislikes. And for someone like me who likes control, and is a recovering perfectionist, it’s been tough, but rewarding. 

      Nourishing Her Body

      I’m definitely a ‘breakfast is the most important meal of the day’ person. I cannot function without breakfast, and I am an oats devotee. Cooked rolled oats, with almond milk, 7 raw almonds, blueberries, and bananas. To me, that’s the only way I can kickstart the day. When writing, I snack quite a bit – there’s something about chewing that keeps me focused. 

      READ MORE: How To Reflect On The Year You’ve Had – And Prepare For The Year Ahead

      The Demands Of Writing

      Writing for me is deeply necessary. It’s clarity, it’s tangibility. Feelings, thoughts, intentions, plans… things do not feel real to me unless they’re archived and written. I’m working hard at making writing a daily practice – I’m following The Artist’s Way’s Morning Pages practice – because it definitely provides me with so much clarity and helps me process how I understand the world. I’m a list-maker, a letter writer, a note-taker and now a novelist. So much in the world feels ephemeral and disposable and finding practices where we can hold onto things for a little bit longer definitely feels like a luxury. 

      Learning To Relax

      I have a really hard time with the concept of relaxation. But being intentional about certain routines helped me immensely. Morning Pages first thing in the morning is definitely something I enjoy – I freeform write for three pages.

      I am also newly converted to Pilates – not exactly the most relaxing thing I’ve ever done, but there’s something special about feeling yourself getting stronger. And last but not least, reading – everything from romance novels, to sociological non-fiction.  

      READ MORE: 15 Wellness Journals To Kickstart Your Year

      Her Sources Of Strength

      I don’t want to make it to the end of my journey without feeling like I’ve done everything I’ve wanted to do – there are so many childhood dreams I want to fulfil. I do so many things for ‘Younger Me’. I have definitely started growing in my faith as I’ve grown older. And cognitive behavioural therapy helps a lot! 

      What She Wants Readers To Take Away From Her Latest Book

      On one level, it’s a sizzling, fun summer read – so I want readers to have a good time, get lost in my character’s world and immerse themselves in the drama and intrigue. But, on a deeper level, I wanted to explore how we women mediate our lives, how we represent and misrepresent ourselves, what drives our behaviours, insecurities, and deepest desires, and how we fight battles with ourselves and amongst one another for status, power and money.  More

    • 188 Shares

      in health and weelbeing

      How To Reflect On The Year You’ve Had – And Prepare For The Year Ahead

      by

      The end of the year brings a time to press pause and look back on your time in the sun. But learning to reflect on the year you’ve had takes a bit more skill than just writing down a few thoughts. We’ve spoken to Hilary Davies, Social Psychologist and Development Coach,  about how to structure your reflections in a productive way that brings about actionable results. “It is important to spend time thinking about the future to be clear about what we want to do and how we want to be. As we strategise for the future, we create an outline of what we are working towards, be it in our personal or professional lives,” says Davies. 

      Why you should reflect on the year 

      It’s a time to learn 

      “Firstly, reflection is a key component of adult learning, giving us the time to explore our lived experiences and understand them in retrospect rather than in the moment,” says Davies. “This often means we have more information and fewer emotions that may be influencing our responses.”

      It boosts self-awareness 

      “Reflection can also teach us about ourselves and increase our self-awareness, especially linked to emotional and subconscious influences. Reflecting on how we felt in the moment, what was driving that emotion or behaviour, and understanding our triggers gives us a greater ability to manage how we respond in future,” says Davies. 

      You’ll fine-tune a new mindset

      “Reflection on positive situations can create sensations of gratitude and well-being, which in turn have a positive impact on how we show up in the present,” says Davies. “Similarly, reflection on negative situations can help motivate us to create change in our lives. We often get stuck in repetitive cycles of behaviour and thought patterns that become automatic. Reflection can help us to take a step back from the “as is” and explore how we can be more intentional about what we do.”

      READ MORE: 11 Ways To Get More Energy When You’re Feeling Tired

      Reflecting 101: Your Guide 

      “The overall process for reflection and strategizing can be compared to planning a road trip,” says Davies. In this way, ask yourself probing questions that frame the year and you can start working forward from there. 

      Ask yourself questions 

      What did you enjoy? Was there anything you did not enjoy? What could you have done differently? Per a Harvard Business School study, three themes that shape what executives in business reflect on are failure, success and frustration. Tap into these themes in your reflections to uncover some truths that could help you shape your future. 

      Decide your new direction  

      If you compare a year’s reflection like you would a trip, you can strategise your moves, says Davies. For example, ask yourself where you want to go and what you’d like to do. Is it something new? What kind of information do you need to get to this new destination? How long do you plan on being there? Do you need a budget of sorts? 

      READ MORE: How To Really Harness Self-Care

      Plan your next steps 

      Now, you can break down your goals into bite-sized steps that will help direct your path. What would you need before embarking on this trip? 

      Change gears if you need to 

      “The most important part to remember is that once you are driving, you can decide to change your destination or the route to get there. In the same way, in real life you can continue the process of reflection and adjusting the strategy,” says Davies. “Reflection is a continuous process that helps us to optimise our decisions and behaviours in the moment so that you can get the most from whatever you’re doing.”

      Don’t hold yourself back 

      When you reflect on the year, be careful not to criticise yourself too much, cautions Davies. “We should not be overly self-critical – reflection is a learning opportunity, not a chance to beat yourself up. To do this, it is important to adopt a growth mindset,” says Davies. “If you find yourself being overly self-critical during reflection, think about what you would say to a friend in the same situation as you. Remember – we all do the best we can with what we have at the moment.”

      Look at things holistically 

      Whatever happened in the year, remember that things don’t work in isolation. Various factors influence the happenings in our lives and we only have a finite amount of resources. “If you feel like you didn’t achieve what you wanted to in one area, look at the big picture. Did you overachieve in another?” asks Davies. “The key is to remember to find balance. If your reflective strategy focuses entirely on work, be aware of how this may impact your relationships with friends and family.

      READ MORE: Enjoy Your Downtime (Without Feeling Guilty) In 3 Easy Steps

      Get realistic 

      When planning ahead and reflecting, it’s important to stay grounded and realistic. You want to strive towards things that you can achieve so that you don’t get burned out, says Davies. “Health and wellbeing, both mental and physical, are two of the most important life areas that often get overlooked as we focus our attention on other areas where we are seeking achievement or success.” Be mindful of how much time and energy you have.  Is it realistic to achieve everything in all aspects of your life?”

      Prepare for change

      Change is most successful if we’ve taken the time to prepare properly for it. If, say, your new goal is to ace a 10K run, prepare to make changes to your lifestyle to incorporate the training. “To train for the 10km run,  you may need to start getting up an hour earlier.  You may have to change our diet as we need more fuel,” explains Davies. “Understanding the future situation helps us prepare for the change we are about to make, both practically and mentally. Physical preparation helps us remove friction from the change – we know we need to get up earlier so we start going to be earlier, or we put the running clothes out the night before. Mental preparation is important so that we can manage any negative thoughts that create resistance to change. This is where mindset, agility and resilience are key in achieving our desired future.”

      Hilary Davies is a Social Psychologist and Development Coach, supporting people in their personal and professional development to adopt change, find purpose and fulfil their potential. She also specialises in Gender Transformation consultancy, addressing social barriers in organisations that limit women’s growth. You can find her at www.hedcoaching.com or on LinkedIn.  More

    • 63 Shares

      in health and weelbeing

      The Thing About Self-Care Is…

      by

      Self-care – most crave it; most want its much-discussed benefits yet in between the demands of everyday life, we find ourselves often striking it off our to-do lists.

      As aptly put by Betterup.com, “…self-care practices are intentional steps to take care of yourself. Self-care practices put deposits into your wellness ‘bank account’. Consistent deposits give you more internal resources to draw upon during stressful times.”

      Countless research has been published on how practising regular self-care leaves us energetic and emotionally sound, with some room to extend a helping hand to others. As the New Age hashtag goes, #SelfishIsTheNewSelfLove. Being busy should not stand in the way of you indulging in one or two self-care routines daily. Remember: There aren’t enough hours in a day as it is, and you may never have free “me-time” waiting for you to claim it.

      Below, three women share heartwarming anecdotes of how they learnt (the hard way) that pouring from an empty cup wasn’t sustainable — and that if anything, it leads to physical and mental exhaustion. 

      READ MORE: 21 Best Self-Care Gifts For Her That Go Way Beyond Face Masks

      Lally Dladla

      “It took a hysterectomy for me to realise that I was kind, giving and generous to everyone but myself!”

      In 2020 I started having dizzy spells, heavy monthly periods and recurring nosebleeds but paid them no heed. Over and above the pandemic-induced anxiety, I didn’t need the additional stress of a body desperately crying out for attention. A visit to my gynae in 2021 revealed that I had a rare condition that required an urgent hysterectomy. Postponing indefinitely would lead to my health being compromised. One thing anyone who knows me will vouch for is that I live for my sons, my miracle babies.

      Leading up to the op, I’d quell my anxiety by reminding myself that postponing wouldn’t only cut my life short, but also rob my sons of the opportunity to grow old with me. So, I forged ahead – fear in tow. Exhausted and drowning in my thoughts one morning post-op, it suddenly dawned on me that I either didn’t love myself or had no idea what self-love looked like. In hindsight, being diagnosed with anaemia, low blood pressure, the hysterectomy and getting Covid – all in one year – were a wake-up call. I started wondering what treating myself kindly, healthwise, would look like.

      A good place to start, I decided, would be to implement the lifestyle changes I’d been long meaning to make. I now follow a vegetarian diet, I’ve parted ways with booze and take long walks in the morning – I can’t run yet due to the hysterectomy. These changes, though small, have done wonders for my energy levels. I consider them a secret pact between my body and soul. Now six months into my Put-Lally-First journey, self-love is constantly reminding the nurturer in me to take a chill pill because I’m prioritising myself.

      READ MORE: What Is Cozy Cardio On TikTok? Trainers Weigh In On The Comfy Workout Trend

      Matata Diamonde

      “Scheduling play time has been really big for me; it makes me feel like I’m prioritising myself.”

      I come from a family that has always been big on self-development. My mother, a Fourth Way healer (a behavioural and spiritual type of well-being practice) introduced me to alternative forms of healing quite early on. Growing up in India, I did a lot of meditation and started transactional analysis at a young age. I vividly remember being ill as a child and starting to practice Reiki (an energy-correcting practice that promotes relaxation and reduces stress and anxiety through gentle touch) because meds were just not helping my condition.

      I also struggled a bit as a child so, I was in therapy by age 14. It was around this same age that I started attracting friends who needed the kind of support that was way beyond what my teenage brain could offer. And I stuck around because I’d made their well-being my responsibility. I’d assigned myself, though totally unintentionally, the role of “rescuer” in my relationships.

      As a result, being taken advantage of became a recurring theme in my life as I got older, one that started popping up in work, romantic and familial relationships. After my father’s passing, I spent a big part of my inheritance in a romantic relationship where I was treated really badly. I still feel a lot of shame for being in the situation, but this incident was the big wake-up call that made me closely examine my “rescuer” default. I’d started noticing that I had a lot of pent-up anger, resentment and that I almost didn’t wish people well in those situations where I felt taken advantage of. These new traits were totally out of character for me.

      Time and lots of reflection have taught me that I kept attracting situations where I felt “used and depleted” because, at my core, I wanted to be needed, validated and not feel abandoned. With a few adjustments to my beliefs, I’m slowly realising that I’m resourceful enough to meet these needs myself. For instance, my morning routine is sacred. I now give myself an hour of consistent quiet time. When I don’t, I find that everything gets heightened – I become cranky, my workload feels unmanageable and my interactions with people aren’t as fulfilling. At some point, I tried out pole dancing and signed up with a vocal coach. Seeking out new ways to better understand myself has been revolutionary on my self-care journey.

      READ MORE: Struggle Sleeping? Here’s How To Create A Bedtime Routine, Per Experts

      Marjorie Arnold

      “During the worst phase of my adult life, veganism served as my life raft. It made me realise that I was worthy of life despite a niggly voice whispering, ‘Your body failed you from a very young age.’” 

      I was raised by a single mother, in a small town. My mother was a teacher and our home a hive of activity. We always had learners come in and out of our house for all sorts of help. And I quickly internalised that being in service to others determined one’s worth. My, was I wrong! It was only later that I discovered that self-love was not a frivolous marketing concept aimed at persuading consumers to keep buying more stuff. When my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 breast and lymph cancer in 2010, she came to stay with me at the height of my freelance career in publishing, advertising and reality TV. I had just resigned from a toxic permanent job in magazines.

      In between full-time caregiving, I worked Monday right through to Sunday. It never occurred to me that my own well-being mattered, despite my slew of past and present chronic health issues. I had Perthes Disease as a child and was wheelchair-bound; I was always undergoing one op or another. I’ve had a limp, chronic body pain and anxiety disorder all my life. When my mother survived chemo and her cancer, I thought I’d have a moment to catch my breath. I’d been operating in survival mode for so long that trying to return to the groove of just living was impossible. However, losing myself in caregiving and my freelance gigs turned out to be my lifeline. Had I not, I wouldn’t have noticed the urgency of the lifestyle changes I owed myself. Going vegan was what ultimately flung open the doors of self-worth for me.

      As a nurturer and giver, traits I inherited from my mother, redirecting my compassion to learning about cruelty to animals and really caring for the environment made me feel good. My journey to better self-care (and it has been loooong!) has taught me that, sometimes, prioritising myself will come in the form of taking a step back – even if it means regressing. I’m grateful for the many bold steps that I took along the way because I’m currently in a career that aligns perfectly with my values and personality. I’ve also learnt that I can’t help others before helping myself (basic, I know!) During this journey, I also allowed myself to cry more, something I have come to understand is an essential part of healing.

      READ MORE: 18 Mental Health Books For Anxiety, People-Pleasing And More

      Easy Daily Self-Care Practises To Adopt

      Practise guided meditation

      Do some breathwork throughout the day

      Dress up (please do, even with nowhere to go)

      Incorporate one fun activity on your to-do list

      Declutter your space (even if it’s just one room per day)

      Read a book

      Eat a balanced diet

      Give yourself a break in between meetings (where you don’t feel guilty about doing absolutely nothing. Stare into space if you must!)

      Keep a gratitude journal

      Take a walk

      Listen to music that uplifts you

      Exercise regularly

      Take a social media break

      Plan a holiday (even though you can’t afford one at the moment)

      Do at least one thing that contributes to a bigger goal

      Treat yourself to an at-home spa day

      Work from a new spot or coffee shop

      Do a random act of kindness

      Switch off your phone an hour or two before bedtime

      Sleep earlier More

    • 125 Shares

      in health and weelbeing

      Author Rešoketšwe Manenzhe On Pursuing Simplicity For Better Mental Clarity

      by

      The South African literary world knows Rešoketšwe Manenzhe as a poet, short story writer and award-winning novelist. Even with her 2020 debut novel Scatterlings receiving rave reviews worldwide, the 32-year-old is hellbent on maintaining a simple life – something she suspects was inspired by growing up in rural Limpopo.

      “I really am a simple person. I think some would describe me as boring – and I’m totally fine with that. Being totally fine with this has actually led me to really be okay with myself a lot of the time,” she explains. 

      READ MORE: Banesa Tseki On How Yoga Gave Her A New Lease On Life

      Simplicity

      Simplicity is an undertaking that recently made Rešoketšwe leave social media in pursuit of living in the moment. Citing the joke about bringing back diaries because everybody is just putting their business everywhere, Rešoketšwe says,

      “We laugh at this joke but it’s also kind of true. Social media has made us too connected. I don’t think we’re meant to know so much about each other’s thoughts. And I wanted to have, and maintain, a certain mystery with people. As in, meet people at face value and experience them for the first time without thinking about something they said on Twitter.” 

      READ MORE: Anthropologist, Poet And Author Lebohang Masango On Exploring Paths Less Travelled

      Career Paths

      Rešoketšwe’s writing journey was inspired by her love for poetry back in high school. “I never studied literature or anything related to it. I just kept writing poetry, then did short stories and progressed to novels,” she explains. How’s that for a reminder that passion can truly steer us in the direction of our dream lives? Though Rešoketšwe is currently completing her PhD in Chemical Engineering at the University of Cape Town, she admits that if she could venture into anything new right now, it would be to study film. “If, at 18, I knew what I know now, I would’ve gone to film school. But we don’t know that some things are options until we are much older,” she muses. 

      With two career streams that are a far cry from each other, Rešoketšwe is still grateful that she held onto a truth she discovered in her formative years. “Knowing for a fact that I’m not someone who would do well in corporate really saved me. I don’t fit well into that kind of mould. That structure really leaves me depleted.” For now, while she figures out how to merge her scientific and creative worlds, she’s holding on to simplicity, in all forms, as her guiding force. 

      READ MORE: Actress Shannon Esra On Learning To Trust Her Intuition

      Lesser Known Facts

      “Sci-fi and romance are my top two favourite genres. I think that nobody suspects this because I write a lot of literary fiction, which doesn’t fit neatly into any genre.”

      On Embracing Stress 

      “I have such packed days that I haven’t had much of a social life in a long while. Honestly, I haven’t reached a point where I’m able to better handle stress. I’m just trying to survive at this point, and that’s also okay.”

      This article was originally published in the July/August 2023 issue of Women’s Health SA. More

    • 113 Shares

      in health and weelbeing

      I Tried Ozone Sauna Therapy – Here’s What Happened

      by

      From the plethora of health and wellness treatments comes something unusual: a gassed-up treatment that promises to heal and reinvigorate. We went ahead and tried ozone sauna therapy at Expand Health to scope out the vibe.

      What is ozone sauna therapy?

      Simply put, it’s a chamber that emits steam and ozone. The steam opens up the skin’s pores, making it possible for ozone to enter the body and be absorbed, so that the benefits can be felt. Your head is never inside the ozone chamber, since ozone is toxic to breathe in (kind of like the ozone in the sky we’re trying to combat).

      Patients are given an oxygen mask to breathe in, so that the ozone doesn’t enter the lungs and cause damage and the chamber should be sealed off at the head.

      While ozone is toxic if breathed in, it’s believed there are other benefits to be gained from having it seep through your pores. Anecdotally, it’s used to treat skin lesions, fight viral infections, activate the immune system and even boost digestion. Many of the benefits, per studies, are yet to be proved scientifically, and researchers are working to gain a greater understanding of ozone therapies.

      Per the little research that exists, ozone therapy could:

      Boost your immune system, since the flood of oxygen in the body stimulates immunity.

      Improve circulation, as fresh oxygen travels to your cells, organs and tissues.

      Protect from foreign invaders, as a boosted immunity halts growth of bacteria and viruses and limits their survival.

      Reduce oxidative stress, since oxygen brings in new life to cells. It could in this way calm inflammation and chronic disease.

      I tried ozone sauna therapy

      I went to Expand Health in Cape Town to try their ozone sauna. They have a range of treatments on offer, from red light therapy to cryo-chamber and oxygen therapy. I opted for the ozone sauna, not entirely because of the cold, but because it’s one of the treatments I had yet to try.

      After dispatching of my garments and donning a towel, I climbed into the sauna chamber and sat on the sterilised seat, while my therapist closed up the machine to let the ozone in. It felt steamy and warm and smelled a bit like chlorine, but not in an overwhelmingly bad way. The ozone seeped through my pores for twenty minutes at varying heats, starting from a balmy 38º Celcius. I promptly fell asleep and felt blissful. After my session, I felt remarkably clean and dewy. I also felt refreshed.

      My therapist and practice manager, Carmen Heunis, tells me that the really revitalising effects are felt from coming to regular sessions – which makes sense, since most therapies need to be done often to see results. Overall, I felt it was a really lovely and passive way to take in something with rejuvenating effects.

      Before your ozone sauna therapy

      Make sure you have a qualified practitioner administering the treatment

      Make sure you never breathe in the ozone as this can be toxic

      Make sure you use a proper machine that never opens during the treatment

      You should have oxygen throughout so that you never breathe in the ozone

      Before you leave the machine, you should wait for the ozone to be suctioned out of the machine before opening

      For peace of mind with this kind of treatment, make sure your facility is part of the South African Association of Health And Skincare Professionals More

    • 75 Shares

      in health and weelbeing

      From Unconscious Eating To Intentional Wellness

      by

      We’ve all done it before – eating on the go, snacking in front of one or more screens, indulging when we’re not hungry, and rushing through meals, it’s even become the norm to some. However, these are not harmless habits.In response, mindful eating has been gaining popularity in recent years as a way to cultivate a deeper connection with our food and our bodies. The practice is centred on fully immersing yourself in the nutritional experience of tasting your food.

      According to Márcia Garcia Eugenio, Head for Multiply Incentivised Wellness for Momentum Health Solutions improved health and wellness lies in breaking free from this cycle of thoughtless eating and instead approach each mouthful with intention.

      To help start you on your journey and guide you in making mindful eating a fun and positive practice, Momentum Multiply has created the 5Ms of truly mindful eating:

      1. Make time

      Set time aside for meals, this will ensure that you don’t hurry while eating and end up just gulping everything and anything down. Not eating enough times in the day can result in actually eating more than we may need at our next meal.

      2. Minimise distractions

      Aim to be fully present with every meal – turn off the TV, put down your phone and step away from any other distractions. Except good company of course – sharing meals with friends or family is a great way to connect.

      3. More chewing = smoother digestion

      Take your time and chew your food slowly and thoroughly to make sure that you savour each mouthful. This will help you experience the depth of your foods’ flavour, texture and taste. 

      4. Mind the 80/20 Rule

      Research1 suggest to achieve a healthy diet, 80 percent of your daily intake should consist of nutritious food such as fruit, vegetables, high-fibre carbs and protein. So stop before you eat – and intentionally choose based on what you’ve already eaten, and still planning to consume.

      5. Make it an experience!

      Different foods have different textures, taste, and consistency. So, when you eat, opt for variety in food to add to the experience. This provides you with a wider spectrum of valuable nutrients and encourages to make every meal worth sitting down for.  

      To guide you on your holistic wellness journey, Momentum Multiply’s new products Multiply Inspire and Engage helps members live a healthy, balanced life by rewarding them for improving both their physical health and mental wellbeing.

      Truly mindful eating is not a one-size-fits-all approach, and it may take some time and practice to develop. However, the benefits it can offer are limitless. By adopting a more mindful approach to your overall health from eating to keeping active and everything in between, will result in endless benefits.

      Visit multiply.co.za to start your journey and unlock the priceless value of holistic wellness. 

      1Understanding Calories | Why All Calories are not Equal – Harvard School of Public Health (chgeharvard.org) More

    • 125 Shares

      in health and weelbeing

      5 Steps For Tapping Into Motivation, Direct From The Pros

      by

      We’re meant to start a new year full of beans, dreams and a renewed sense of purpose… At least that’s what Instagram tells us. But, if it feels like you’re in a rut or can’t quite work up the energy to do whatever it is you really want to do, you’re not stuck in neutral alone. Just one example: 52 per cent of unhappy employees say they lack energy and motivation, according to a recent Indeed survey. No matter where you think your drive is – or isn’t – right now, these simple steps can help to rev up your motivation. Hint: it’s all about embracing the long game and being kinder to yourself.

      1. Do Something 

      Reality check: drive isn’t something that only lucky people have, like great hair or fast feet. Anyone can develop drive (or motivation – experts use them interchangeably) if you know how to go about it.

      “People often think of motivation and drive as the big flame that happens if you take lighter fluid and spray it all over a grill,” says Steve Magness, an executive coach, performance expert and co-author of the book Peak Performance. “A better way to think about drive is that you get some coal, light the fire and let it slow burn over time. That allows us to sustain and cook whatever we’re trying to cook.” 

      James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, writes that “one of the most surprising things about motivation is that it comes after starting a new behaviour, not before.” In other words, you don’t just get motivated, then do something. You do something, and that gets you motivated. “Getting started, even in very small ways … naturally produces momentum,” he writes. If starting out, even in a “very small way,” feels like anything from a minor sticking point to a monumental obstacle, he recommends making the first few steps so easy that you waste no energy thinking about doing them.

      So instead of waiting “until you feel like it” to overhaul your LinkedIn profile to get the job you want, block out 10 minutes to play around with the first entry. Instead of trying to overhaul your nutrition, start by planning what you’ll have for breakfast most days and buying the ingredients.

      2. Remove Barriers

      Even the pro athletes sometimes have a tough time getting started, says Magness, who has worked with NBA players and Olympians. “What saves these athletes is that their environment is set up in a way that lowers the bar – there’s less activation energy that’s needed to get out the door.” They have trainers devising their workouts, training partners depending on them to show up. Their systems are organised to minimise hurdles. And good news: you can do the same. 

      During a rough period when Magness says he was working too much and finding excuses not to exercise, he added five minutes to his evening commute to get to a park where he liked to run. The easy choice would have been to take the faster way home. But by going a few minutes out of his way and seeing his running shoes on the passenger seat, he removed the barrier to taking that run. “It’s almost like your brain sees running as the easier decision now. Those cues are inviting you to take that action, and you don’t have to think about it,” he explains.

      Success strategy: Unlocking motivation is all about the long game, say experts. Seeing drive as a slow burn to sustain rather than a big flame.

      3. Create Micro-goals

      Dr David Zald has watched motivation disappear. He’s the director of the Center for Advanced Human Brain Imaging Research at Rutgers University. His research has found that this happens when the workload seems too heavy or the rewards too far off. The obvious but hard-to-see-when-you’re-in-it solution is to break that big goal into smaller, doable tasks. 

      “Below your goal are subgoals, each of which has its own subgoals, cascading down to specific behaviours,” says Dr James M. Diefendorff, a professor of industrial/organisational psychology. Goals closer to the top of the hierarchy explain why you’re doing what you’re doing and reflect your values, while goals further down explain how the goal will be met, he says. Subgoals help you understand the steps you need to take and give you tasks to succeed at along the way – both help make long-term goals more manageable. Feeling like you’re making progress also feeds drive.

      So below ‘take all my vacation days this year,’ subgoals might be: ‘narrow down Airbnbs to two,’ then ‘email options to friends,’ and finally ‘book it.’ Similarly, if you’re having a hard time getting excited about a long run, promise yourself that you’ll run a kilometre or so, then take a break, and repeat that pattern until you’re finished, tips Zald.

      Key in on the phrase ‘take a break,’ too. You’re more likely to stick to a goal if you earn immediate rewards for steps you take rather than delaying rewards until you’re finished, according to research by Dr Ayelet Fishbach, author of Get It Done: Surprising Lessons from the Science of Motivation.

      4. Stop One Rep Short

      If you’re driven, you’re always pushing yourself hard… right? Performance coach Brad Stulberg wants to change your mind about that. In his new book, The Practice of Groundedness, he makes the case that “anyone can crush themselves and do an Instagram-worthy workout or all-nighter. That’s actually pretty easy. What is hard is maintaining drive for longer periods of time.” To keep it going, “force yourself to stop the equivalent of one rep short, day in and day out. Doing that is all about going a little slower today so you can go faster tomorrow.” Close the laptop at 6pm instead of 7pm. Sit down to eat lunch. Drive runs on sustainable energy, so feed it right.

      Success strategy: Rather than driving to the basket non-stop, be patient with yourself and look after your energy levels for a real motivation winner.

      5. Let Drive Change

       “The pandemic altered the lives of nearly everyone and led millions to re-evaluate and clarify the core of what is important, essential or meaningful in life – which may not be climbing the corporate ladder,” says Diefendorff.

      What sets you on fire can be a moving target, since we become interested in different things and develop different values over the course of our lives, he adds. To understand what you care about, try thinking about what happens on your best days. What gives you energy and excitement? If you don’t want to switch jobs or goals to feel a sense of drive again, “try to structure your day to ensure that some ‘best day’ activities can be experienced at least some of the time,” Diefendorff suggests.

      The post 5 Steps For Tapping Into Motivation, Direct From The Pros appeared first on Women’s Health. Words by Emily Sohn More

    • 150 Shares

      in health and weelbeing

      Everything You Know About Self-Care Isn’t Wrong… But It’s Not Quite Right

      by

      The term ‘self-care’ is having a moment, but is it the right one? When it’s not being sold to us in the form of candles or fuzzy PJs via Instagram ads, self-care is taking over our TikTok FYP with “everything shower” routines. It’s become an excuse for our every indulgence. Happy hour after a terrible day at work? That’s self-care. Brunch, followed by a Euphoria-inspired mani? It’s all self-care, baby. Splurging on a beach vacay after the hell of these past few years? Self. Care.

      But how much we seem to be focusing on self-care online doesn’t actually align with reality. Nearly half of women are struggling with burnout, according to a workplace survey by Indeed. Meanwhile, a 2022 mental health report by Liptember Foundation revealed that 69% of women are stressed and 44% are facing anxiety. 

      Stats like these raise this question: if the ‘treat yourself’ approach to self-care is working, why are we still so frazzled and worn out? Well, according to experts, we’re all somewhat missing the point. “Self-care is about taking time to understand your true needs beyond your impulses,” says Dr Chloe Carmichael, a therapist and author of Nervous Energy: Harness the Power of Your Anxiety. “It’s looking at yourself on a deeper level.”

      It’s not that a vacation or a happy hour isn’t a worthy form of self-care. Sometimes ‘treating yourself’ is what’s needed, notes Carmichael. But the truth is, if that’s all you’re doing, you’re missing out on the real benefits. Keep reading for a step-by-step lesson in strengthening your relationship to caring for yourself.

      Apps That Will Change Your Life

      Peptalk

      Start your morning with a motivational pep talk from the most inspiring people in the world. You experience a simulated video call with professional athletes, celebs, and musicians. Whatever your goals PEPTALK will be your personal coach, trainer or accountability buddy.

      Streaks

      Some psychologists claim that it takes 21 days for a new habit to form; others argue it’s closer to three months. Either way, sticking to anything for that long can be tough. Streaks is a self-improvement coach that helps you ingrain those healthy behaviours by logging the good stuff you get done.

      Shine

      This app is like a cross between a supportive friend and psychologist – each day you’ll get an uplifting message. Also, you can tap into the library of resources with exercises such as mindful cooking or creating a coffee ritual and work through expert-approved challenges to upskill in areas like self-confidence and anxiety.

      Action point one: Define what self-care really means to you

      There isn’t one single meaning of the term. It’s an ever-evolving concept that’s constantly updated, for better and for worse. “Self-care” as a cultural phenomenon was first introduced by feminist author Audre Lorde in her 1988 essay collection, A Burst of Light, says Dr Omolara Thomas Uwemedimo, an assistant professor at Northwell Health in New York.

      “For her, a Black, queer woman, self-care was about self-preservation. It was about being able to see your identity outside of the white gaze and come back to yourself. It wasn’t something nice to do, but something that kept you alive.” 

      Since then, self-care has been appropriated by marketing whizzes eager to sell an idealised version – and the exxy candles that come with it. But now, finally, we’re starting to come full circle and to build upon Lorde’s original thoughts, adds Dr Catherine Cook-Cottone, a professor whose research focuses on mindful self-care. People recognise the holes in that commercialised alteration and are searching for a deeper understanding of what it can do. “Self-care isn’t something you buy,” Cook-Cottone says. “It’s an active practice of taking care of the internal aspects within the context of external pressures.” According to Dr Barbara Riegel, a University of Pennsylvania nursing professor who studies chronic illness, self-care is about “taking control of your body and taking control of what’s going on with you.” For Uwemedimo, self-care is “creating space in your life to remember who you are and what your purpose is.” 

      So in short, the semantics are up to you. Just remember that it’s a lot like parenting yourself, which means it’s your job to stay focused on what you need, not what you want in the moment. That’s not always easy. One example to drive the point home: social connection is important, but maybe you just moved and don’t know anyone, so reaching out feels scary. You can tell yourself that staying home with Netflix is self-care (and it may make you feel good at first), but Netflix won’t fill your need.

      “Self-care is about taking an honest look at what you require in order to function your best – not only today, but in the broader sense,” Carmichael explains.

      Action point two: Find ways to feed your mind, body and soul

      One of the most difficult aspects of self-care is that it’s so individual. “There isn’t a litmus test where certain behaviours always count as self-care,” Carmichael says. “It depends on the person.” So, how do you know what you need? And how do you find that balance between pushing yourself outside your comfort zone and comforting yourself when you need it?

      Remember ART

      Remember the acronym ART to help you decipher if your self-care behaviour is on point, suggests Cook-Cottone. A is ‘attunement’. As in, are you tuned in to what you really need? R stands for ‘responsive.’ Is the behaviour going to serve that need? And T is ‘taking action’. Will you follow through? If you’re having trouble with the first part, you might start including time in your routine to do nothing but reflect.

      “Taking a break is important to develop awareness,” Cook-Cottone says. That *might* mean taking a regular bubble bath, but while you’re in the water, ask yourself: what do I need to feel my best? What is working in my life right now, and what isn’t? If you’re short on time, you can accomplish the same goal by using the moments you spend on other activities – say, folding the laundry or working out – to focus on your breath and simply listen.

      Time To Pause

      Instilling a time to pause in your day should give you an idea of what, if anything, is missing from your routine. It’s also good practice for knowing what you need in the moment. You might learn that you should focus more on physical forms of self-care: getting enough sleep, eating well, exercising, taking prescribed medications, and so on. Or maybe managing stress is an area that’d be good to work on, which eventually leads you to a mindfulness practice or more time outside in nature. Maybe you need to do something creative or something that contributes to your community, like volunteering for a cause you care about.

      Friendly reminder: as a complex being, you have complex needs. It’s not as if you can pick one self-care activity and call it a day. “You want a diverse portfolio of self-care,” advises Cook-Cottone. Some activities will be for your physical well-being, while others will be more for your spiritual and social sides. From there, all you have to do is make sure to make time for that self-care on the regular.

      So, yes, this means that you want to have structure, but also the leeway for spontaneity. Include small, daily practices like saying a loving thing to yourself while you brush your teeth, as well as formal practices like regular meditation. Scheduling a variety of activities (fitness classes, meet-ups with friends, whatever lights you up) can take some decision-making off the table. Creating lots of opportunities and practising varied ways of providing care for yourself will help you “be more agile and responsive in the moment,” explains Cook-Cottone. In other words, when a stressor comes up, it’ll be easier to dig into your toolbox and lean on a practice that’s already routine.

      Action point three: Set boundaries in new ways

      This can have multiple applications and implications. First, you want to set boundaries that protect your time for yourself, like saying no to a night out when what you really crave is a good sweat or some time to process a bad day with a mate. You also want to set boundaries for what you accept as appropriate for your life. That means setting rules for the types of treatment you tolerate in your relationships or at work. This second type of boundary is generally harder to set, given how our culture rewards women for being able to push through anything. The benefit is that when we set boundaries for ourselves, we’re protecting others too. We’re making it smoother for other women to set similar boundaries. “It’s easier to do that in community, so you don’t feel like the odd person out,” Uwemedimo says. 

      It’s all too simple to let self-care be last on our to-do list. But without it, you’ll lose yourself in the constant pressures – and who wants to live like that? Plus, self-care isn’t just a mental boon. If you ignore it, you’re setting yourself up for major health issues down the line, from burnout to true chronic illnesses like depression, diabetes or heart disease, Riegel says. “It’s not something that can wait.” All the more reason to start putting yourself first.

      The post Everything You Know About Self-Care Isn’t Wrong… But It’s Not Quite Right appeared first on Women’s Health. More