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      How to Cope With These Common Holiday Triggers

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      It’s supposed to be the “most wonderful time of the year,” so why are there so many holiday triggers? It’s the time of the year when families come together, gifts and food are abundant, and memories are made, but it’s also a time when it’s dark by 5 p.m., the weather is freezing, and Taylor Swift just dropped an album that make you want to cry, not to mention that this time of year can actually bring up a lot of painful feelings, anxiety, and stress. Whether your stress starts at Thanksgiving or you’re hit with the post-holiday sadness after New Year’s Day, read on for expert tips on how to cope and get through the season enjoyably.

      If you’re feeling pressure or exhaustion thinking about the season…
      You are probably expecting way too much. “The holidays are so stressful because there are a lot of ‘shoulds’ placed around them,” explained Chloe Ballatore, a relationship and communications expert and author. “Holidays have rituals, or repetitive activities, so really think through if doing these activities are serving your own best interests.” With the holidays approaching, identify where you think you “should” do something and if you’re doing it for any other reason than it makes you happy or you want to do it. Respect your own happiness over expectations and try not to do anything because you feel like you “should” do them. 

      If you have a negative relationship with food… 
      Whether it’s Friendsgiving, gift exchanges, Hanukkah, or Christmas dinner, holiday gatherings often revolve around food. For those with any kind of negative relationship with food or even a medically restrictive diet, the focus on food can be triggering. Tayler Silfverduk, a registered dietician who specializes in celiac disease and disordered eating, advised to be aware of food pushers, which are people who do not take “no” for an answer when offering food (even if it’s a well-intentioned aunt or grandparent), which can be highly triggering. If you need to, remind your family that your body and eating habits aren’t up for discussion. Overall, eat mindfully, have a game plan if you know you’ll have limited food options (like bringing a hearty side dish to eat for your main course if you don’t eat turkey), and consistently remind yourself that nourishment should be pleasurable—stress about food is worse for your body than any Christmas cookie or cup of eggnog. 

      If family get-togethers are triggering…
      Maybe you don’t get along with certain family members or maybe your family events can just be draining. Maybe you have family members who do not agree with your political or core beliefs, argue through every get-together, or make you feel stressed/pressured. Missy McCrickard, an energy healer, breathwork facilitator, and wellbeing coach, suggested setting boundaries with your family members or removing yourself from the situation altogether. It’s OK to say “No thank you” or “I can’t engage in this conversation.” When setting boundaries, let your family know the boundaries beforehand so they know what will or will not happen when you are together. You can also let them know you will remove yourself from the situation if you do not feel respected or comfortable. You cannot control anyone but yourself, so setting what your personal boundaries and reactions will look like is crucial for navigating tricky family dynamics.

      If you feel lonely during the holidays…
      Whether this time of year reminds you of family members who are no longer in our lives, you feel sad not seeing family this year, or the season is a reminder that you don’t have the relationship or family you want, the holidays can feel lonely. Dr. Rebecca Leslie, a psychologist and owner of Best Within You Therapy & Wellness, said that connecting in whatever way feels fulfilling to you is the most important thing to do when you’re feeling lonely. Set up friendsgivings, gift exchanges, or get-togethers (even if they’re virtual) with people who make you feel loved and supported. “If you’re feeling alone, know that you are not alone in feeling that way,” Dr. Leslie said. “Try to be kind to yourself and practice self-compassion.” Talk to yourself as you would your best friend or little sister, spend time with your favorite hobbies, books, people, and movies, and say ‘no’ to anything that doesn’t make you happier. Practicing self-compassion and fostering connection can help ease loneliness.

      If you’re sober during the holidays…
      If you find that many holiday traditions rooted in a partying or drinking environment feel triggering to your sobriety in any way, set boundaries and seek support. Beth Bowen LMSW, a coach for alcohol-free and sober-curious women, suggested managing your physical, mental, and emotional energy by making sure you are getting extra sleep, turning down invitations to events you don’t want to attend, fueling your body with nutritious food, and exercising regularly. These practices can help you feel grounded so you can make choices that help your body feel best. If you feel uncomfortable being sober in an alcohol-focused environment, bring your own non-alcoholic beverage or perfect your non-alcoholic order so you can have something tasty and celebratory. This can be a mocktail, non-alcoholic beer/wine, or something like sparkling water. 

      If you are financially stressed during the holidays…
      While this season should be more about spending time with loved ones than spending money, we often like to show our love with gifts come the holiday season. Beyond our shopping list, we spend money on new outfits, food and drinks to bring to parties, travel expenses, etc., which can all really add up. “First and foremost, remember you are not alone,” said Sara Kuburic, a holiday triggerspsychotherapist, consultant, writer, and columnist. “Stick to your budget, be honest with people you are spending time with, and find traditions that are more affordable or free.”
      Good news: Gifting doesn’t have to break the bank. Homemade gifts like jewelry, candles, or art can help erase some of the expenses and can even be more personal and thoughtful than a store-bought gift. Lastly, while it can be a bummer to say “no,” try setting boundaries around foregoing gift exchanges or events that cause you more financial stress than enjoyment. Instead, make plans with loved ones for activities that won’t cost a lot of money (and stress): a virtual catch-up, movie night at home, walking around the neighborhood to look at the lights, or a potluck and BYOB dinner (so you’re not in charge of providing all the food and drinks). 

      And no matter what you feel triggered by…
      Practicing consistent self-care is crucial all year long but especially during extra stressful or triggering times like this season. “Make a schedule every day so you can plan ahead and schedule in ways to care for yourself,” suggested Dr. Elizabeth Lombardo, PhD, a celebrity psychologist, keynote speaker, and author. “Determine which days will be particularly demanding and plan self-care activities before, during, or after those days.” Also, when you feel triggered in the moment, have a game plan. Try grounding yourself by taking 10 deep breaths from your belly, journaling, venting to a trusted loved one, or any other coping skills you have in your toolbox. Lastly, you should not be triggered, struggling, or coping alone. Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist.

      Anxiety, toxic family relationships, and depression can feel isolating, but you shouldn’t have to feel as though you’re going through it alone. Please reach out to your doctor, a therapist, or another trusted professional for support.
      National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255)
      Crisis Textline: text CONNECT to 741741
      If you are struggling with an eating disorder or with disordered thoughts or behaviors regarding food and eating, please seek help. Call the National Eating Disorders Association Helpline at 1-800-931-2237 for support, reach out to a qualified medical professional, or, for a 24-hour crisis line, text “NEDA” to 741741.

      35 Gratitude Affirmations To Help You Get Through the Holidays
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      Struggle to Get to Sleep? Try These 5 Breathing Techniques

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      Sleep proving elusive, even when you’ve parked your phone, done your ‘yoga for bedtime’ session and drawn yourself a hot, magnesium salt-packed bath?
      If so, know that you are far from alone: According to the South African Society of Sleep Medicine (SASSM), insomnia affects about 30-40% of adults. When work, family and pandemic and political stresses collide, it’s little wonder.
      One thing it pays to try? Breathing techniques for sleep.
      READ MORE: What Is A Sleep Divorce? And Do You Need One?
      One person who encourages working with your breath to catch more zeds is Michael Townsend Williams, a yoga and mindfulness teacher, author of Do Breathe (R199, takealot.com) and co-founder of the app BreatheSync, which helps you breathe in sync with your heart to reduce stress and improve focus.
      ‘Sleep problems are often caused by our inability to switch off the mind and relax our bodies, which is where breathing can help,’ he tells WH. ‘Slow, controlled breathing triggers the body’s natural relaxation response. Your heart rate slows, your muscles relax and your mind calms down, making you more mentally and physically prepared to fall asleep easily.’
      So, rather than rattling through your to-do list or over-analysing the day’s conversations as you attempt to slumber, why not turn your attention to your breathing instead, learn how to use it as a relaxation technique and try out some of Williams’ suggestions below.
      5 breathing techniques for sleep to try
      1. Best breathing technique for anxiety
      When you’re suffering from the symptoms of anxiety and can’t stop worrying, simply counting your breaths can slow down your mental chatter, prevent the escalation of worry and help you reach a calm, centred place.
      How to deal with anxiety can be as simple as breath work. Michael recommends:

      Counting your breaths down from 40.
      To start with, count both your exhalations and inhalations from 40 to 20.
      Then, from 20 to 0, count only your exhalations.
      After that, continue to breath normally but with awareness of your breath.

      If you find this hard, then it’s fine to start the technique with lower numbers. The important thing is that you’re training your mind to focus where you want it to be, not on endless worries. If you’re still feeling anxious, then try writing your concerns down and then repeating the breathing exercise.
      READ MORE: Should You Start Taking Magnesium For Sleep?
      2. Best breathing technique for stress
      While anxiety often encompasses a generalised and wide-ranging sense of worry, stress is normally related to a specific event or area of your life, such as a work assignment or upcoming speech.
      Whilst managing your stress is important, Michael points out that experiencing it isn’t always a bad thing. ‘If you’re stressed because you’re facing a new challenge at work or moving out of your comfort zone, don’t worry. It’s normal to feel pressure in these situations. But to perform at your best you need to feel calm and energised, and that won’t happen if you don’t get a good night’s sleep.’
      One technique that might help is simple alternate nostril breathing. How?

      Close your right nostril and breathe in through the left.
      Then, close the left and breathe out through the right.
      Breathe in right. Breathe out left.
      Continue breathing slowly and deeply from one side to the other.

      Hopefully, this should make you feel calm and focused. Close your eyes, visualise yourself successfully completing whatever challenge you’re stressed about, then let yourself relax into sleep.
      3. Best breathing technique for over-thinking
      We’ve all done it – got into a heightened state before bed by watching an intense drama on the TV or scrolling for hours on a smartphone. This type of activity puts the sympathetic branch of your autonomic nervous system into overdrive. As a result, stress hormones adrenalin and cortisol in your blood make it difficult to switch off your over-stimulated mind and tense body, and sleep is tricky.
      In this instance, Michael recommends breathing from your belly. Try:

      Breathe in for four seconds and out for six seconds, both through the nose.
      This will equal six full breaths a minute, which research has shown to be the best rhythm for improving your physiology effectively.

      A longer exhalation like this triggers the relaxation response. In a short time your body will be free of adrenalin and cortisol and you will feel a lot better for it.
      READ MORE: The 10 Best Sleep Apps To Help You Fall Asleep Faster And Sleep Through The Night
      4. Best breathing technique for insomnia
      It’s hugely irritating when you wake in the middle of the night and can’t get back to sleep (we’ve all ended up in the ‘how to sleep better‘ Google hole once). Michael recommends an exercise from his mindfulness course to combat this, in which you imagine drawing a line slowly around your body.
      How?

      Start from the crown of your head.
      Make your way down the right side of your body, around your arms and legs.
      Then go back up the left side of your body, ending up where you started.
      Keep your mind occupied with this ‘body trace’ while breathing slowly and deeply from your belly.

      Another option is to simply notice the gaps between your breaths. Observe how when your breath stills for a moment, your mind naturally stills too. Sometimes these little pauses are all it takes to learn how to get a good night’s sleep.
      5. Best breathing technique for energy
      While many people struggle to get to sleep, others have the opposite problem, feeling sleepy even in the morning or during the day when they need to be awake.
      In this case, Michael recommends a classic yoga exercise. Kapalabhati (literal meaning: shining skull) are rhythmic exhalations with a pumping action that flush out air from your lungs, stimulate the nervous system and release tension.
      To prepare, take three deep breaths in and out. Then:

      Draw your tummy in sharply as you exhale. Repeat once a second so you get into a rhythm.
      Remember not to hold your breath; you will be inhaling in between exhalations but not consciously. Just focus on the sharp exhalations.
      If you find this difficult, try placing your hand on your tummy and press gently with each exhalation. It can take time for your stomach muscles to react quickly enough.
      Repeat with 20 pumps at first, then breathe deeply before holding your breath for 30 seconds if possible.

      That’s one round done – you’re aiming to repeat for three rounds. You can build up the repetitions from 20 to 30 to 40 to 60. You can also learn to retain your breath for longer. Don’t be too competitive though – slow, steady progress is best.
      With these breathing techniques for sleep you should be deep in slumber in no time!
      This article was originally published on Women’s Health UK

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      10 Books To Read if You Want To Improve Yourself

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      The cliche of “finding yourself” always made no sense to me until I actually did. But finding out who you are and what makes you unique just skims the surface. Discovering what makes me truly happy, the kind of people I want to surround myself with, and what motivates me to work hard has shaped who I am and what I will become. A huge part of this has been self-improvement books. I mean, we gotta learn how to be our best selves from someone else, right? It can be difficult to find the best self-improvement books for you, as every self-discovery journey is pretty tailored. We’ve made it just a little easier by rounding up some of our favorites to get you started.

      Cara Alwill Leyba
      Style Your Mind
      This read made me finally understand what I was missing in order to be successful: KNOW YOURSELF *cue Drake voice*. This workbook forces you to contemplate your goals and desires, and because the book is so gorgeous, I focused on including more than just scribbles and half-thought out responses. After working through this, I have a stronger understanding of what I want out of my life and how I’m going to get there.

      Eckhart Tolle
      A New Earth
      To no one’s surprise, Oprah was right. I was really apprehensive of this book at first – the entire concept of an “ego” just seemed a little weird. Boy was I wrong! This book is perfect for anyone who struggles to let things go. I have a tendency to get obsessive about things; I always want to be better! Tolle addresses this through his explanations of the ego while providing some actually pretty common sense resolutions to that stress in your daily life. Reading this finally allowed me to realize what causes stress and anxiety in my life and encouraged me to change those things.

      Maureen Johnson
      How I Resist: Activism and Hope for a New Generation
      Finding my voice in my activism has been difficult. I am a privileged woman and can sometimes feel like I don’t have any experiences or insight to bring to the table. Regardless of where you stand politically, this book discusses more about how you can fight for change and the hope that comes along with that. This is really aimed at a teen audience, but I took away a hope and excitement for the future as an adult. Not to mention the incredible list of contributors on this makes it a necessary read.

      Jolene Hart
      Eat Pretty: Nutrition for Beauty, Inside and Out
      This is not your typical recipe book. Eat Pretty simplifies the whole idea of “holistic nutrition” and makes food easy. I’ve always had a negative relationship with food, and this book has reminded me over and over again (I’ve read it a few times!) the ways in which food can nourish and support my skin, hair and bones and the energy it gives me to go through my day. Now I’m not saying I didn’t have a donut for breakfast this morning, but if you’re looking for a new way to look at food and improve that relationship, this is the read for you.

      Brené Brown
      Daring Greatly
      If you’ve ever seen Brené Brown’s amazing podcast about shame and vulnerability, this is basically its mom. I’ve always been a pretty open person, but this book took it to another level. One of the hardest things to learn is being vulnerable, and this book does an incredible job at explaining why it is so difficult and provides the little steps we can take to learn how. Brown includes several anecdotes to share just how she struggles with this same thing even though researching and discussing shame is her job. I might be biased as this is one of my favorite self-development reads, but this is one I would most certainly pick up if I were you.

      Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls
      Sleeveless tops, shorts, bathing suits – summer can be rough if you have any issues with body images, and unfortunately, that is something many women experience. This book is not only a fun read, but everything Jes Baker says is backed up by research, making her advice feel even more credible. Don’t struggle with body image issues? (Woohoo!) Baker gives tons of advice on just living unapologetically yourself, which I think everyone could really benefit from.

      Shannon Kaiser
      The Self-Love Experiment
      As a self-proclaimed perfectionist and atychiphobic (fear of failure!), I can get pretty hung up on every little mistake I make. The Self Love Experiment is that bit of encouragement to get me out of those thoughts and remember just how much good my failures can do. Kaiser takes you on her journey to self-love and acceptance, and through her true testimony, I started to realize more about my own journey as well. She’s candid and real and doesn’t lead you on that self-love is a quick fix. Also, having a little reminder that you’re more than a sum of your failures is pretty powerful.

      Dan Harris
      10% Happier
      As a journalist, I already knew I’d identify with Dan Harris. As I read through his struggles with anxiety and panic attacks, though, I began to realize just how relatable he is to so many of us. 10% Happier chronicles his experience working on ABC News, what it was like having a panic attack on the air and how meditation and mindfulness helped him get a handle on his anxiety. Anyone who’s even slightly curious about meditation but doesn’t know where to start, look no further.

      Katty Kay and Claire Shipman
      The Confidence Code
      For those who are more left brained, this is the one for you. The Confidence Code utilizes research and science to discuss confidence: why we want it and why it’s so hard to get. Both authors are journalists and do a great job of making the neuroscience understandable for someone who knows nothing about DNA. This book showed me a new way to look at being confident in myself all while providing the tools and stories I needed to actually start my own journey toward it.

      Gabby Bernstein
      Super Attractor: Methods for Manifesting a Life Beyond Your Wildest Dreams
      No matter your experience level with the Law of Attraction, Gabby Bernstein makes it simple and effective. The Law of Attraction is about more than manifesting sports cars and diamond jewelry, and this book shows that it can be as simple as changing your mindset for a positive one. This dives pretty deep, so expect to take lots of notes.

      15 Books to Read if You Need a Mental Health Boost More

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      PSA: The Holidays Can Seriously Mess With Your Gut Health—Here’s How Experts Prevent It

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      From Thanksgiving turkey to New Year’s champagne, the holidays are full of delicious indulgences, favorite foods, and a busy social life, which are all fun and games until the gut health issues and digestive drama kicks in. There’s a reason that “holiday belly” is a thing and our digestive symptoms either worsen or resurface when the season starts. Maybe you even expect a constant stomachache from now until January or stock up on digestive enzymes and anti-gas pills this time of year (if you ask me, the real Grinch is painful bloat and constipation).
      The good news is that gut issues don’t have to be a given with the holiday season like the ugly sweater your mom will make you wear or the embarrassing cards she’ll send to relatives. Gut issues are typically due to specific problems and routine changes that come around this time of year, which means they are manageable. Because I’m personally over the digestive drama, I asked experts how to keep my gut health in check without giving up my favorite foods and traditions. Here’s what they said. 

      What makes gut health worse during the holidays?

      Lack of routine
      Turns out, your gut might not be as spontaneous as you are. Packed schedules, holiday travel, and a totally abnormal diet are all factors that can affect gut health. “The gut thrives in routine, especially when it comes to sleep, exercise, and meals,” explained Erin Judge, RDN, a registered dietitian nutritionist, gut health expert, and founder of Gutivate. “The holiday season throws off routines, thanks to travel, busy schedules, and shorter days. This can confuse the gut and lead to digestive symptoms, especially changes in bowel motility.” Just like your sleep cycle and menstruation cycle, your gut works best when it’s on a cycle too. When you’re eating at unfamiliar times (like late at night) or your body is going through general routine changes (like changing time zones), your gut might be affected.
      “When we’re changing time zones or even just out of normal routine, our internal rhythms are disrupted, often causing the metabolism to be less effective,” agreed William Siff, a licensed acupuncturist, clinical herbalist, ethnobotanist, and health educator who founded Goldthread Tonics. “Weaker digestive fire leads to slower digestion, which will cause gas, bloating, inflammation, and more.” It’s not just about what you eat during the holidays that wrecks havoc on your gut (but more on that below)—lack of consistency in all areas of your life can lead to weakened digestion and a confused gut. 

      Chronic stress
      If you think your packed schedule, growing shopping lists, and family turmoil only affects your sanity, think again. Stress levels are a huge factor in gut health because the gut and brain are connected (via the gut-brain axis). “The gut and the brain communicate, so stress can cause us to clench muscle groups and hold tension in our abdomen, which can affect digestion,” explained Willow Jarosh, MS, RD, a dietician nutritionist and expert for Health-Ade. “Stress can also lead to changes in movement in the gut, and stress-related gut symptoms can vary (like constipation, diarrhea, gas, bloating, cramping, etc.).” 
      “The stress of the holiday season can increase cortisol levels, which sends the body into the sympathetic nervous system state,” Judge agreed. “During this state, the digestive system also goes into a state of stress, which can lead to changes in bowel motility and bloating.” Stress can affect gut symptoms by changing the chemical messages passed along on the gut-brain axis and also because we often hold tension in our abdominal muscles, which tenses the gut, causing cramping, gas, constipation, or irregular bowel movements. “Tension forms in the gut area when we’re feeling stressed, and these tight muscles in our diaphragm make digestion harder,” Siff explained. Bottom line: Stress is not just something you know you should improve eventually—it deserves to be the #1 priority when taking care of your health. 

      Abnormal diet
      No surprise here: Those sugar cookies, spoonfuls of gravy, and glasses of holiday punch are not your gut’s BFFs. “Holiday foods are higher in sugar and fats that slow down the gut due to malabsorption and are lower in fiber that helps regulate the gut and improve the health of gut microbes, leading to bloating and discomfort,” Judge explained. Your favorite holiday foods from a cup of eggnog to cornbread casserole are often less nutritious because of the high sugar content (who can say “no” to gingerbread?) and contain less fiber, which is an essential nutrient to keep the gut healthy and keep you regular.
      So while our holiday diets typically have less fiber that feeds the good bacteria, the increased amount of sugar is feeding the bad bacteria. “We likely eat more sugar this time of year, which can imbalance the gut microbiome and allow the bad bacteria to grow,” Siff said. However, the answer is not to avoid all of your favorite foods for fear of a gut flare-up. In the end, a rich meal or a sugary cookie here and there is not going to majorly affect your gut (and the body is meant to detox all on its own), but changing your diet and eating less crucial nutrients over a period of time can cause uncomfortable gut symptoms. 

      How to keep your gut healthy during the holidays:

      Stay consistent whenever you can
      Yes, routine is crucial, but our routines don’t have to be perfect to be beneficial. You don’t need to leave a holiday party early if you’re having fun just to keep your regular bedtime, and you shouldn’t forego traveling to keep your gut in check. This also doesn’t mean you have to fit in a 60-minute workout every single day or bring a container of your go-to meal to a holiday dinner, all in the name of “consistency.” Instead, be consistent where you can, whether it’s having the same morning routine (no matter where you are or what time it starts), getting seven to nine hours of sleep (even if that means 1 a.m. to 8 a.m. instead of your usual 10 p.m. to 6 a.m.), and fitting in movement (whether its a 60-minute workout or a walk around the block with your mom). 
      Judge recommended eating meals throughout the day, getting enough hours of sleep every night, and fitting in movement, because any amount of consistency helps keep your gut stay happy. But consistency doesn’t have to mean doing the same thing every day—it can simply mean taking time to check in with your body. “Try to carve out time each day to do something that helps you connect to your body, whether that’s a meditation or a walk without your phone,” Jarosh recommended. “Try to keep sleep consistent, hydrate throughout the day, don’t start a diet or try to skip meals in preparation for holiday meals, and practice strategies to avoid diet-related talk or feel the need to detox (that can cause stress on both the mind and body).”

      Prioritize stress relief 
      “Health, especially in the gut, always begins with the mind because our core area is extremely sensitive and actually has more nerves than anywhere besides the spine,” Siff explained. In other words, staying positive and seeking joy (including joy with food!) is not only good for your experience but also good for your gut. Judge recommended prioritizing habits that can help your body move into the parasympathetic nervous system state, or “rest and digest.” “This can be done through diaphragmatic breathing, mindfulness exercises, meditation, and adequate sleep. Starting your meals with breathing and mindfulness can also help you digest your food better and have less discomfort,” she said.
      In general, doing whatever you can to keep stress levels down can have a huge effect on your gut, digestion, and symptoms. So when you’re about to go ham (pun intended) on a huge holiday feast? You know what to do: Take some deep breaths, eat mindfully, and enjoy every bite without one bit of shame, guilt, or regret.

      Start strong in the morning
      Have you ever skipped meals or ate light snacks throughout the day, knowing you were going to a big holiday party at night and thought it was best to save room or calories? Yeah, same. In reality, the body does not work that way. If you go into a holiday buffet or extravagant dinner without properly nourishing your body throughout the day, you’ll be more likely to mindlessly binge, eat past the point of fullness, and not make mindful decisions of what you would really enjoy or what would nourish the body.
      Most importantly, breakfast is an essential chance to get in crucial nutrients that will help the gut stay healthy, even with added sugars and lack of fiber in other meals later in the day. “Starting every day with a breakfast rich in fiber is a guaranteed way to improve your gut health because prebiotic fiber is the fuel for probiotics and can help keep your gut healthy,” suggested Kara Landau, RD, a gut health expert and founder of Uplift Food. No matter what your holiday plans entail later, start the day off strong with a smoothie full of fruits and veggies, add leafy greens and onions to an omelet, or eat a side of fiber-rich fruits like berries to get in some added good-for-the-gut nutrients.

      Be mindful about meals
      Good news: Every expert I talked to agreed that you do not need to give up your favorite foods and that stress over food is worse for the gut than any cup of eggnog or slice of pumpkin pie could ever be. If you eat a diet rich in whole foods and nutritious fruits and veggies most of the year, a buttery dinner roll, plate of creamy Alfredo, or a few too many glasses of punch at the office party won’t make any difference. Instead of restricting, just be mindful. Your plate can (and should!) contain both the foods you love and the nutrients you know are going to make your body feel good.
      “The holiday season is a time for treats and indulgences, but your diet can still include gut-friendly nutrients,” suggested Sofia Popov, MSc, BSc, a microbiome scientist and founder of GUTXY. “Eating fiber helps your gut bacteria make short-chain fatty acids, which give your gut energy and keep digestion running smoothly.” Bottom line: Enjoy your favorite foods, but don’t skimp on the Brussels sprouts, salad, and pomegranate seeds—your plate and your gut have room for it all. 

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      8 Things To Do When the Sunday Scaries Set In

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      One of the pure banes of adulthood is the dreaded Sunday Scaries. Typically following a blissfully unaware weekend, the Sunday Scaries creep into your mind on a Sunday morning, fully setting up shop and wreaking havoc by the afternoon. They bring with them feelings of intense doom, despair, and usually a little self-doubt and loathing, just for good measure. Ultimately, your mind turns to your job, then your career, and then every life choice you’ve ever made. Instead of giving in, give these tips a try to take back your weekend fun. 

      1. Get chores done at the end of your work week
      We’ve all been guilty of barreling down the office door at 5 p.m. on Friday, hoping to find some work-week relief in the bottom of a wine glass. This blissfully unaware state spills into Saturday and then early Sunday morning, and soon you’re left staring at a massive to-do list, a pile of laundry, and an empty fridge by Sunday afternoon. The anxiety sets in, you wonder where the weekend went, and you’re now panicking to get your chores in order so you can pretend you’ve actually got a pulled-together life. Sound familiar?
      Instead of leaving all your unpleasant-but-necessary tasks for Sunday, try to complete them on Friday or another weeknight. This means picking out outfits for the week, meal prepping, and grocery shopping. Sunday is now your day to enjoy, with tasks already sorted for the week ahead.

      2. Finish work tasks on Friday and make a to-do list for Monday
      Does the phrase “that’s a problem for Monday” sound familiar? Many times, the biggest source of the Sunday Scaries is the loose ends we leave at work on Friday, being both too unmotivated to complete them and too naive to realize that we probably won’t remember where we left off. Nip this problem in the bud by leaving your desk and inbox super tidy, with detailed notes that’ll jog your memory on Monday. I like to spend the last 15 minutes at my desk on Friday writing a detailed to-do list for Monday, which usually saves me a half hour of trying to remember what I needed to do when Monday finally hits. 

      3. Set a loose weekend objective
      I often text my significant other on Friday (or Thursday, depending on how desperate I am for the weekend) about what I want to do over the weekend. It’s usually just one or two things and can range from the ambitious and specific (“I want to go on a hike”) to something more low-key (“can we just sleep all weekend?”). He usually agrees to my proposals, and then we have a framework for our weekend. It helps us plan fun activities amongst the chores and obligations and also makes us consciously think about what we need to feel recharged on any given weekend. As an extreme planner and goal setter, this tip has helped me feel accomplished and rejuvenated when I get back to my desk on Monday because I feel like I accomplished what I intended to.

      4. Completely unplug
      It’s tempting to want to glance at your emails over the weekend to stay on top of any major issues and gear up for the following week, but I’m going to tell you right now that you need to stop. It’s a soul-sucking task that will leave you feeling drained and resentful. I’ve personally been guilty of “just checking” my work emails at 2 p.m. on a Sunday and then having my whole day ruined over an issue I can do nothing about until the next morning. Unless your job requires you to be on call, deactivate all work notifications over the weekend to avoid having your phone become a source of anxiety. If you truly cannot imagine yourself unplugging all weekend, allow yourself a few minutes of skimming time Sunday night to help put your mind at ease and prep for the work week.

      5. Treat your weekends as mini vacations
      Avoid getting into weekend ruts and instead think of each weekend as a vacation and opportunity instead of mindlessly going through your typical weekend routine. This mindset shift can help you feel recharged and relaxed come Monday morning, and I encourage you to do enjoyable things over your weekend. The idea is to treat your two days off as a complete break from your everyday life by stepping away from work, chores, and other obligations as much as possible. This is your chance to finally try out that brunch spot, take a painting class, or just walk through the park without interruptions. It’s two full days to relax and recharge the skills you use at work.

      6. Do something fun Sunday night
      Planning an activity for Sunday night means two things: You have to get all your sh*t done before and you have something to look forward to at the exact time Sunday Scaries rears its ugly head. It usually helps if this activity is relaxing, such as trying out a new dinner recipe, meeting a friend for dessert, or reading your favorite book. Treat those last fleeting moments of your weekend freedom as what they are: freedom. 

      7. Plan a Monday treat
      Carry some of that weekend “treat yo’ self” magic into your Monday and give yourself something to look forward to every week. Maybe Mondays are the day you get UberEats and binge watch Netflix or take yourself out for lunch at your favorite deli. Pick something you look forward to, no matter how small, and make it your Monday thing. Don’t allow this treat any other day of the week (especially on the weekends!). You’ll be looking forward to the start of the week in no time. 

      8. Ask yourself why you feel this way
      It’s normal to occasionally dread the work week, no matter how much you enjoy your job. Sometimes just identifying the stressor (like a meeting with your boss first thing Monday morning or having an overly packed schedule) can be enough to help you feel empowered enough to face it. Often times, the stress from one or two things can be overwhelming and manifest itself into something bigger and scarier. Chatting with your partner or friend about your feelings can often help put the stress to rest. If your anxiety about Mondays is crippling week after week, it’s time to address why. Sometimes these dark feelings can be cause for a re-evaluation of a career or serious chat with your boss about work-life balance or work-related issues. 

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      I’m No Wellness Expert—But Here Are the Easy Steps I Take To Make My Days Better

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      Now that the end of daylight savings has blessed us with darkness at 4 p.m.—my absolute least favorite part of winter, by the way—there is no better time than now to consciously work toward creating habits that can improve your overall wellbeing. I know that it’s much easier said than done (and sometimes you just need to have a bad day), but I can say from experience that implementing small changes into my daily routine has significantly helped improved my overall mental health.
      As someone who is not an expert in all things wellness, I needed to find healthy habits that actually fit into my routine, rather than trying to be someone I am not. Some of these things might sound silly, but I’ve learned that consciously working toward mindfulness, romanticizing the little things, and setting intentions for myself really does work for me. If that’s just not your jam, that’s fine too. Although winter is just beginning, I’ve been working on these things for quite some time, which hopefully means that I can keep doing these easy steps and have a less dreary winter as a result.
      Here are seven easy steps I take to make my days better:

      1. I romanticize my coffee routine
      If there’s one thing I make sure to do every single day, it’s make myself a coffee-shop level homemade latte. It’s been about a year and a half since I upgraded from a Keurig to a Nespresso, and I can confidently say that I’ll never go back. There’s something so meditative and relaxing about taking five minutes to brew some espresso, froth some milk, and truly enjoy my iced latte. Plus, it doesn’t hurt that I save money by actually preferring to make my own coffee at home.

      2. I try to incorporate mindfulness and meditation into my daily routine
      I am by no means well-versed in practicing mindfulness or meditation, but it’s a small thing that I’ve started trying out. I will search Spotify for a quick five-minute meditation and do it while on a walk or relaxing at home. As far as practicing mindfulness, I make an effort to be more intentional about the things I do—and don’t do. I’ve also really worked on learning to shift my mindset when I need to. For example, if I’m getting in my head a lot or overthinking something that’s happening in my life, I remind myself that I have the power to choose how I approach and handle the situation.

      3. I found physical activities I actually enjoy
      During the spring of this year, I genuinely fell in love with going on long walks as a regular part of my routine. I learned that not only are there tons of health benefits of walking, but it also really helps to clear my mind and boost my overall energy. I take the time to listen to music or podcasts, and it is a great way for me to unplug and unwind from my day. Outside of walking, I also started taking tennis lessons and have truly been enjoying it as a new hobby. I’ve learned that finding forms of exercise that I actually enjoy is so much better for me than trying to force myself to go to a gym or do intense workouts that I dread.

      4. I make it a rule to do one thing just for myself every Sunday
      A lot of times, I find myself with a pretty severe case of the Sunday scaries. I tend to get overwhelmed and anxious, so over the summer I decided that in order to combat that, I should treat myself to something that’s just for me every Sunday. Some examples include:  ordering food from one of my favorite restaurants, going on a Target run for no specific reason, watching the sunrise or sunset, or popping some popcorn and watching an old favorite movie.

      5. I started using a budgeting app
      I put off actually budgeting my monthly spending for so long that the task felt far too overwhelming to start. I always figured that it would stress me out more than it would help, but after a few recommendations from friends, I decided to download an app that does it for me (I use Truebill). After using it for a few months, I can honestly say that it’s given me more peace of mind and helped me feel less anxious overall.

      6. I take breaks from Netflix and my phone to read instead
      Although I love watching Netflix and scrolling social media as much as the next gal, sometimes I find myself getting lost in mind-numbing binge sessions and TikTok black holes and need to take a break from my screens—especially when I spend all day working on one. I’ve always ebbed and flowed when it comes to how regularly I read (like reading seven books in a row and then not picking one up for months), but I’ve been in a consistent reading groove—mostly on my Kindle, which I am absolutely obsessed with—for quite some time now, and it’s been very enjoyable.

      7. I cook a slightly more advanced recipe a few times per week
      I’ve talked about it before, but I’ll say it again: I’ve never really been super into cooking, however over the past year or so I’ve started to experiment more in the kitchen. I actually find it extremely therapeutic to spend some time cooking a meal for myself, and it helps me to take a break and just focus on that for a little bit. I’ve made it a goal to make myself something that isn’t just a frozen Trader Joe’s meal (although I’ll never give those up) at least a couple times a week.

      10 Easy Habits That Will Make You Healthier and Happier More

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      I Tried Ashley Graham’s Wellness Routine–Here’s What Happened

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      Let’s be honest: Who doesn’t have a crush on Ashley Graham? The supermodel and fashion icon slayed the cover of major fashion magazines like Sports Illustrated, redefined the fashion industry, wrote a best-selling book on body positivity, and has such a killer personality, her millions of Instagram followers think of her as their personal best friend. The best part about Ashley (yes, we are on a first name basis) is that she is known for so much more than her stunning lingerie line or for gracing the cover of the world’s biggest fashion magazines. She’s a body positivity activist who is redefining what self-care means.
      Since Ashley is so open about how she takes care of herself to inspire her fans and followers to take care of themselves too, I had to investigate for myself to get all the secrets of her wellness routine. Besides her supermodel genes, Ashley has an undeniable glow, infectious confidence, and limitless energy (I mean, her workouts are tough). Basically, I would try just about anything to be a little more like Ashley Graham. I scoured interviews, YouTube videos, and her Instagram to find all the details of Ashley’s enviable (and relatable!) wellness routine to try for myself. Here’s what happened. 

      Daily prayer
      Ashley’s faith is a huge part of her life and she has credited it to helping her with everything from coping with fame to keeping her relationship strong. In an interview with Bustle, Ashley said she prays every morning and will have prayer nights where she’ll turn the lights off and pray out loud. “I pray out loud because my words have power, impact, and directness over my future,” she said. “It’s like making a vision board with your mouth.” OK, let’s unpack this because I don’t know much, but I know I absolutely need to try anything that’s “making a vision board for your mouth.” I’ve dabbled in meditation, but staying consistent with affirmations or manifestations has always been hard for me. 
      For a week, I made an effort to do my version of prayer every morning, which, in most cases, looks like writing or meditating on a few things I’m thankful for and also what I hope to feel throughout the day. Before bed, I tried to make my routine as similar to Ashley’s prayer nights as possible by turning off the lights and saying things out loud like, “I love my life” or “I am worthy of reaching my dreams.” I’m going to be honest: Saying these things out loud was way out of my comfort zone (and my boyfriend thought I had officially lost it), but it was insanely powerful. IDK if I’ll always be Ashley-level confident enough to speak out loud my desires and prayers, but after trying it for a week, I totally get why she’s so badass.

      Stretch or do some kind of movement
      It’s no secret that Ashley is a workout addict. In addition to sharing her workouts consistently with her Instagram community and in interviews, she has a workout series on YouTube so you can work out with Ashley from the comfort of your own home (a true dream!). I found details of her intense and demanding workout routine on Insider, but TBH, I don’t have enough motivation to go that hard every day and don’t have enough knowledge, equipment, or skills to try kickboxing. So instead, I stuck to her advice to just stretch or do some kind of movement every single day. I always try to move my body in some way every day (as any good wellness editor would do), but the most impactful takeaway from my week living as Ashley Graham was the “why” behind exercise. 
      When internet trolls left body shaming comments on a workout she shared on Instagram, Ashley responded, “Just for the record, I work out to stay healthy, feel good, get rid of jet lag, clear my head, show big girls we can move like the rest of ’em, stay flexible and strong, and give more energy. I don’t work out to loose [sic] weight or my curves—I love the skin I’m in.” Fitness often focuses on change, whether it’s losing fat by burning calories or toning up by strengthening muscles. I loved her perspective on exercise: It’s not really about change but rather a way to just maintain health and feel your best (no change necessary). Since then, I’ve stopped working out to be better, faster, stronger, or fitter. Instead, I’m working out to feel good in the moment. 

      Be choosy about who you spend your time with
      You are who you hang out with, and Ashley Graham knows it. “Bad company corrupts good character” is one of her go-to one liners because she is extremely intentional about who she surrounds herself with and how she spends her time. I’m a huge believer that we are the sum of the five people we surround ourselves with, but I don’t always act on it (read: I often get together with people who are boring or like to gossip because I don’t want to say no).
      But this experiment made me think that Ashley wouldn’t be as confident as she seems if she was spending time with people who made her feel lesser than or wasting time with people who didn’t make her feel heard or happy. I don’t think some of us are born with confidence and other’s aren’t—I believe that we become confident when we have boundaries, practices, and relationships that make us feel good. Every time we make decisions to protect ourselves and live our best lives, we’re inherently telling ourselves what we deserve. So PSA to myself and all of you: Earn confidence by setting boundaries with people who aren’t serving you, and be choosy about who gets your time. 

      Keep skincare simple
      Finally a celebrity with (achievable) flawless skin who doesn’t spend thousands of dollars and hours a week on their complexion. As the relatable queen we know and love, Ashley likes to keep in simple when it comes to skincare (a quick wash, vitamin C serum, moisturizer, and SPF, to be exact). I love her reasoning that the body is already healing itself, so it doesn’t need much help (amen, Ashley!). I’ll be honest: I am not as cool when it comes to skincare.
      What I wish was a low-maintenance routine is actually quite high-maintenance (like I have five to 10 steps morning and night). I pared down to the four simple steps Ashley swears by, and to my chagrin, my skin looked the same as it did with the much more complicated routine. Note to self: Sometimes simple is better. This was also a good reminder that while we often think of skincare as a pinnacle part of self-care, in reality, if a practice isn’t actually de-stressing you or making you happy, that’s not caring for yourself. If a 10-step skincare routine is your favorite way to relax and pamper yourself, fit it in every single day. But if you’d way rather spend your time (and money) on other ways to take care of yourself? Keep skincare simple (à la Ashley) and focus on what actually feels like self-care. 

      Leave the phone out of the bedroom
      And now for the hardest practice I had to do while living like Ashley Graham: Keeping the phone out of the bedroom. It was hard—and I also had to buy an old school alarm clock and TBH, I did not remember how to work it. “Ever since I interviewed Ariana Huffington for my podcast, Pretty Big Deal, I have not slept with my phone next to my bed,” she told SELF. Her baby monitor typically serves as her alarm clock (AKA she wakes up when baby Isaac wakes up), but since I have no baby or monitor (just a French Bulldog who sleeps hours longer than I do), an old school alarm clock from Amazon would have to do. I had way more time in the mornings when I didn’t check my texts and emails first thing (even five extra minutes makes a difference), but the biggest change was no social media before bed. I felt so much more calm, centered, and relaxed, and I swear I slept better. The old school alarm clock is here to stay. 

      Talk to yourself in the mirror
      You know someone as confident as Ashley has a self-love affirmation as part of their routine. She swears by repeating her affirmations to her reflection every morning or whenever she looks in the mirror. Yes, it’s weird to talk to yourself in the mirror, but Ashley said you “just have to get over it,” so I got over it. Specifically, Ashley says, “I love you, I’m bold, I am brilliant, I am beautiful, I am worthy of all,” so I started saying this phrase to myself whenever I looked in the mirror. Yes, it felt forced and awkward and silly, but it also felt kind of good.
      After all, most of us look in the mirror and say things like “I hate this outfit,” “I need to lose weight,” or “Look at this fat roll.” Our minds form habits, so every time we look at our reflection, we think something bad out of habit. What if we changed the habit? What if we said “I love you” and “You’re perfect” instead of “You’re ugly” and “I wish you were different”? Would we be a little more confident, happy, and more like Ashley? Confidence is a skill, and Ashley Graham practices it every day, which means we can (and should) too.

      The Verdict:
      Even just thinking like Ashley Graham and trying a few of the practices from her wellness routine made me feel different. Maybe it was because I was pretending to live like a Sports Illustrated supermodel or maybe it was because I made self-confidence a practice instead of just something I wish I had more of, but I did feel a shift in my self-love. What I learned most about getting a little too obsessed with Ashley Graham for a week is that she puts her entire life on Instagram for 14 million followers and bares it all in skimpy bikinis on the cover of major magazines, but she still cares more about the way she feels than how she looks. “There’s no pressure to look good for people—I just want to feel good,” she told Forbes. We should all feel confident in our own skin and take care of ourselves as a gift instead of a punishment to our bodies. How you look is not an accomplishment, but loving your body unconditionally and helping other women love theirs too? Now that’s an accomplishment worthy of a magazine cover. 

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      What Is “Ear Seeding” and Can It Really Improve Your Health?

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      Step aside, hoops and diamond studs—ear seeding may have just won the accessory game, and the best part is that they’re more of an ancient wellness practice for optimal health than an accessory trend that upgrades your OOTD (even though that’s true too). The internet may be buzzing about these tiny beads that are strategically placed around the ear (cartilage piercing, who?), but the practice has thousands of years to back up the claimed benefits.
      When I first found out about ear seeding, they had me at “stylish ear accessories that can make you happier and healthier,” but if you need a little more info on what they are, how they work, and whether or not they’re worth it, I got you. I asked Gudrun Snyder, a doctor of East Asian acupuncture, traditional Chinese medicine expert, and founder of Moon Rabbit Acupuncture, to give me the details on all things ear seeding. Read on for a 101 guide to ear seeding and how to reap the benefits for yourself.

      Meet the expert
      Gudrun Snyder, D.Ac., MSAc, LAc
      Doctor of East Asian Acupuncture
      Dr. Snyder is the founder of Moon Rabbit Acupuncture in Chicago. Snyder instills a “whole body” approach to health and wellness that focuses on the body as an interconnected whole.

      In this article

      What is “Ear Seeding?”
      While the practice of ear seeding has been blowing up on Instagram and in trendy wellness spas as of late, it’s a practice that has been used in wellness routines for thousands of years. “Ear seeding is a technique used in traditional Chinese medicine, which is a 3,000+ year-old system of health techniques that also uses acupuncture, herbal medicine, and other modalities to care for the mind and body,” Snyder explained. “The original ear seeds were seeds of the Vaccaria Plant (thus the name “Ear Seeding”), which is a plant that is native to Eurasia and was most often used with traditional acupuncture.”
      So why stick “seeds” (today, everything from 24k gold to Swarovski crystals are used to add an element of style) on our ears? It’s a practice of acupressure, which is acupuncture’s less invasive sibling (and no, needles or piercings are not involved—the beads simply apply a light pressure you barely feel). There is said to be more than 200 pressure points in the ear that correlate with conditions throughout the entire body. When you place the bead in a specific spot, you’re triggering the nervous system to benefit various parts of the body that correlate with each tiny spot. “Like acupuncture, ear seeding works on the meridian system, which is a series of energetic pathways that are found throughout the body,” Snyder said. “Stimulating certain points on the ears will help with the flow of energy and restore balance in the body.”

      What are the benefits of ear seeding?
      According to TCM, every system of the body (digestive, respiratory, reproductive, hormonal, etc.) is energetically connected to pressure points on the ear, meaning activating those pressure points can provide everything from pain relief to less stress. Snyder explained that ear seeding is similar to auricular acupuncture (or ear acupuncture), which has been used for many benefits like decreased cortisol, less addiction cravings, better sleep, and healed pain. While many of Snyder’s clients get ear seeding to help ease anxiety and stress, she said that ear seeds are also a great way to help treat digestion issues, insomnia, weight issues, addiction, and chronic pain. They can work to benefit both the mind and body. 
      While the results of ear seeding may not be as drastic as regular acupuncture appointments with a professional, many people use ear seeding as a way to extend benefits between acupuncture appointments. Better yet, ear seeding is a way for more people to get some of the benefits of acupuncture and acupressure at a cheaper cost from the comfort of their own home in a safe, effective, and even stylish way. 

      Are there any possible risks?
      Since ear seeds are essentially tiny beads that gently stick to the ear for light pressure, there are little to no risks, and you shouldn’t feel any pain. “Given that ear seeds do not puncture the skin, there are no long-term or serious risks with ear seeds,” Snyder said. “Even if you do place the ear seeds in the wrong area, the worst case scenario is that nothing happens.” However, any fabric, formula, or adhesive you put on the skin can cause allergy or sensitivity for some people. Snyder recommended if you do develop an irritation to ear seeds (like itchiness, redness, peeling, or pain), remove them as soon as you can and contact a doctor or dermatologist. To decrease the risk for irritation, quality matters—real gold and sensitive-skin friendly adhesive (like Snyder’s ear seeding kits) are less likely to cause irritation than plastic or metal. 

      How long do the effects last?
      Ear seeds typically stay on for three to seven days and will either naturally fall off on their own or can easily be pulled off. Just like most health practices, the results and length of effects depend on each individual body. “Some people are incredibly responsive to acupuncture and ear seeding, so they will likely see results the same day and the effect will last longer than those who may take a few applications to see a difference,” Snyder said. In other words, you may notice results the day of application or after a few days with the ear seeds on, and benefits can last during the days the ear seeds are on or even for weeks after. As with any other health practice and wellness routine, talk to your doctor or acupuncturist about the best practice for you and how long to leave ear seeds on. 

      If you’re interested in trying ear seeding for yourself…
      Talk to your doctor or acupuncturist to come up with a plan that’s best for you.
      Snyder recommends ear seeding to her clients to either bridge the gap between acupuncture sessions or for clients who aren’t into acupuncture and would much rather go a non-invasive route, but talk to your acupuncturist to identify if ear seeding is right for you and what’s the best approach, plan, and pressure points based on your body, health concerns, and goals (individual kits will come with maps so you know where to place ear seeds based on your health goals as well). Ear seeding is also a great option if you are interested in acupressure but cannot visit an acupuncturist in person. Talk to your doctor about a plan that would be best for you, and if you have sensitive skin or are prone to irritation, check in with your dermatologist on what type of adhesion is best for you. 

      Find an acupuncturist or brand that you trust for application.
      Of course, the best results come from seeing professionals, so if you already have an acupuncturist or TCM doctor you trust, ask them about services or which brands they recommend. Since ear seeding is fairly easy to apply, you can also purchase an at-home kit to do it yourself, which will typically include instructions and tweezers to make application as easy as possible. Snyder warned to be wary of seeds or adhesive that are poor quality, as they may be less effective or cause skin irritation. Look for a brand with pure gold, Swarovski Crystal, or hypo-allergenic beads for the best results. 

      Care for them properly.
      If you are applying the ear seeds yourself, simply press each seed gently against your skin for 30 to 60 seconds in the desired location and take deep breaths for extra connection to the nervous system. “The best way to make your ear seeds last the longest is to apply them to a clean ear,” Snyder recommended. “This can be done by wiping your ear with an alcohol swab prior to application.” Snyder also suggested taking breaks in between applications, though they can be worn as often as possible. “Ear seeds can be applied as often as needed, but try switching sides to give your ear a break or leave at least one day between applications.”

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      Please consult a doctor before beginning any treatments. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical or mental health condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you read in this article.

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