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    60 Realistic New Year’s Resolutions You Can Totally Achieve This Year

    Lose weight. Run a marathon. Cut out alcohol. Get a raise. We make the same tired new year’s resolutions every year that we never manage to keep, or we forget we made them altogether by February. Seriously–is it just me, or do new year’s resolutions never seem to work? My suspicion is that we make resolutions that we think we want, not resolutions that will actually make us healthier and happier. We think losing weight will make us feel more confident or that running a marathon will get us to the gym (and back to that weight loss goal). We believe cutting out alcohol will make us healthier or that getting a raise will make all of our problems disappear. But are these resolutions really making us feel good, or are these “goals” in the name of being better actually distracting us from truly being healthy? 
    In 2023, it’s time to ditch the typical resolutions that leave you feeling stressed out or let down year after year. Instead, opt for resolutions that you’ll enjoy so much and will make you feel so good, you’ll have no trouble sticking with them at all. These 60 new year’s resolutions will make you feel happier, healthier, and all-around better (difficult diets or forced workouts need not apply). Whether you choose one resolution or all 60, you’ll be happier and healthier by 2024. 
     
    If you want to revamp your diet…

    Check in with your body before and after every meal to see how it feels
    Ditch outdated food rules 
    Focus on adding more nutrients (instead of eating fewer calories/carbohydrates, etc.)
    Eat leafy greens with two meals a day
    Drink more water and eat more water-rich produce (like watermelon, romaine, tomatoes, cucumber, etc.)
    Try new produce you’ve never cooked with before
    Eat the rainbow with a variety of fruits and veggies in every color
    Start meal prepping to make cooking during the week easier
    Eat seasonally
    Replace your favorite meals with plant-based alternatives (cauliflower pizza crust, chickpea pasta, etc.)

    If you’re motivated to update your fitness routine…

    Exercise in ways that feel exciting and fun
    Get specific about your goals
    Add an outdoor activity to your routine (going on a walk counts!)
    Be active in ways that don’t feel like exercise (play sports with friends, go ice skating, swim in the summer, etc.)
    Prioritize rest and recovery just as much as you prioritize workouts
    Work out without your phone
    Try something totally new once a month
    Be more active outside of the gym (take the stairs, walk everywhere, etc.)
    Stretch more
    Schedule workouts into your calendar (yes, even if that means your work calendar)

    If you need to stress less…

    Prioritize the hobbies, habits, and people who make you happy
    Reexamine all of your relationships–let go of the ones that don’t make you feel good, and invest more time into the ones that do
    Practice gratitude, even for the smallest things
    Start a meditation practice
    Have a go-to morning and nighttime routine that makes you feel relaxed and happy
    Try a weekly social media detox
    Get 7-9 hours of sleep (every single night)
    Talk to yourself like you talk to loved ones
    Say “no” when you mean no
    Schedule time to do something fun “just because” every day

    If you want to look as good on the outside as you feel on the inside…

    Nail down a skincare routine that you can consistently do every single day
    Focus on scalp-care
    Experiment with color in your makeup routine
    Invest in a beauty supplement
    Find your perfect foundation or concealer shade
    Try a new nail color you’ve never worn before
    Make your quarterly haircut appointments in advance
    Develop a nighttime hair routine
    Wear sunscreen every single day
    Make a skin-check appointment with your dermatologist

    If you want to feel more in control of your finances…

    Max out your retirement contribution or start contributing to a retirement fund
    Pay off credit cards
    Increase your credit score
    Pay off one thing that requires monthly payments
    Reach a certain amount in savings
    Set up an emergency fund and build it to a percentage of your salary
    Save for a big goal (down payment on house, car, etc.)
    Talk with your boss about action plans to maximize your compensation (work toward a raise, check out commuter perks, look at non-health benefits, etc.)
    Work on your financial wellness
    Budget to make room for items, experiences, or indulgences that truly bring you joy

    If you’re ready to upgrade your home…

    Create a daily, weekly, monthly, and seasonal cleaning routine
    Replace one disposable item in your kitchen with a more eco-friendly alternative (for example, swap paper towels for rags, aluminum foil for reusable food wrap, or counter cleaner with a refillable essential-oil based cleaner)
    Tackle one home project a month
    Do a quick declutter of closets, drawers, laundry chairs, and piles of paper once a week
    Make seasonal updates so your home always feels fresh
    Make one big change like painting a wall, getting a new couch, or DIYing a gallery wall to make your space feel like new
    Reorganize one area every month, like your makeup stash, pantry, fridge, or hall closet
    Aim to bring your personality into your home more 
    Get in the habit of cleaning off counters, finishing the dishes, and putting away any laundry before bed
    Make upgrades to your bath or shower for a more peaceful environment

    This Health Expert Swears by One Hack to Achieve Your New Year’s Resolutions More

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    Expert-Backed Hacks to Making Any Holiday Party Gut-Friendly

    There’s no denying it: The holidays are synonymous with food—seemingly endless buffets of sugar-heavy, rich foods—often leaving your gut health waiting in the wings until your New Year’s resolution to eat healthy comes knocking on your door. As someone who loves her sweets and deals with one-too-many gut flare-ups, I’m all for finding a happy medium and enjoying the holiday party circuit and its festive eats without worrying about whether my gut is going to pay the price. Because what’s the holiday season without indulging in figgy pudding and mulled wine surrounded by your favorite fellow partygoers (AKA family and friends)? So I asked experts how to bring our health A game throughout the holiday season sans FOMO, bloat, and digestive discomfort. Read on for their gut-friendly tips. 

    1. Avoid common triggers
    There are foods that make you feel really good, then there are eats that can leave you with a miserable microbiome and feeling like blah. It goes without saying that most holiday spreads go heavy on the latter, causing everything from digestive discomfort to skin breakouts to brain fog and low energy. “Common triggers include dairy, refined sugar, gluten, and certain fibrous vegetables,” explained Juliana Tamayo, MS, RDN, a registered and clinical dietitian. Ask the host if there are any dishes that are lactose-free and consider passing on dishes that contain garlic, onions, broccoli, or cauliflower, which often trigger gut problems.
    Better yet, BYOHD (bring your own gut-friendly dish) complete with a lean protein, healthy fats, and veggies, like this ground turkey sweet potato skillet. “Instead of forcing yourself to eat other people’s foods that might be triggering for you or hurt your gut, try making your own dish and bringing it to the party,” Tamayo suggested. “Offering to cook will always appear like a good gesture, and by doing so, you can guarantee that you are going to have something to eat that settles well with your stomach and won’t hurt your gut health.” 

    2. Say “no” to excess alcohol
    What are the holidays without the likes of apple cider cocktails and peppermintinis? Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news: “Alcohol is not gut-friendly and can kill off the healthy bacteria in your gut,” Tamayo affirmed. “Instead of drinking alcohol excessively, try focusing on drinking 1-2 drinks at most, do not mix alcohols, and eat well beforehand.” Tamayo also recommended opting for bevvies with recipes that call for probiotics and anti-inflammatory ingredients, like kombucha, yogurt, kefir, apple cider vinegar, turmeric, cinnamon, and ginger. “All of these ingredients will help boost your gut health while keeping your microflora (gut-friendly bacteria) alive and happy,” Tamayo conveyed. Emily Brown, an integrative nutrition practitioner and epigenetics expert for rhythm, gave bonus points for drinks with fresh citrus and muddled herbs for their built-in antioxidants and detox support.
    Other drinking tips Brown served up? Reach for healthier drinks, like clean wines or booze-free refreshments, and skip the mixed drinks with added sugars, like syrups or sodas, that leave you with nothing more than a hangover. And try ending the night with a cup of turmeric or nettle tea. Consider it preventive hangover care and essential for healthy digestion, adequate enzymes, and daily elimination.

    3. Start with healthy habits first thing in the morning  
    At the risk of sounding like a broken record (we at The Everygirl don’t take staying hydrated lightly), drink more water, ladies! Baby, it’s cold outside, so you may need an extra nudge to keep up with your water intake. Before you grab your morning coffee or PSL, sip on warm lemon water or tea and keep ’em coming throughout the day. “Enjoy a daily cup of tea with mucilages like aloe, slippery elm, or marshmallow root,” Brown suggested. “These fortify the lining of your gut, like a strong wall preventing inflammation, leaky gut, or irritation.” The best part? “When you stay hydrated, you also feel more energized and satisfied during the day, avoiding overeating and drinking sugary beverages,” Tamayo stated.  
    Brown also advised making exercise your first order of business in the AM: “Something as easy as a 30-minute walk will help set you up for better post-meal blood sugar control all the way to dinner, better circadian rhythm and sleep, and continuity of your healthy habits so that it’s not all ‘on or off’ during the holidays.” To ensure you check fitting in movement off your to-do list? Lay out comfy, casual workout clothes the night before. 

    4. Get your probiotics and fiber in 
    The holidays are nothing if not enjoying the butterscotch pudding and creamy whipped potato casserole you wait all year for with the people you love. So if there’s one thing you do to make sure you are feeding your gut what it needs to be happy and healthy, make it taking probiotics. “They’ve been shown to help our system metabolize alcohol along with all the other digestive and mental health benefits,” Brown said. Tamayo encouraged taking a probiotic supplement every morning or having some yogurt, kefir, or a shot of apple cider vinegar. Also, set your gut up for success by loading up on prebiotic nutrients, like bananas, oats, and flaxseeds, that will help provide fuel for said probiotics. 
    Let’s face it: Most of the typical holiday foods are higher in sugar and lower in fiber, which can lead to the all-too-familiar bloating and constipation. “Eat plenty of dietary fiber, which can help keep your gut regular and promote healthy bacterial growth,” Tamayo recommended. The fiber-rich foods to look out for and choose at your Christmas dinner? Sweet potatoes, legumes, berries, and avocado, just to name a few. 

    5. Nourish your body before and at the start of the party
    “Many people will restrict themselves before holiday gatherings thinking that they’re ‘saving up’ for what’s to be consumed,” expressed Erika Fox, a registered dietitian nutritionist at Supergut. The result? You’ll have eyes bigger than your stomach once you greet that holiday feast, AKA you’re more likely to overindulge and ignore fullness cues. “Instead, give your body a good serving of fiber, protein, and healthy fats before a get-together,” Fox continued.  
    “Start any day, or party, with protein and fat,” Brown echoed. “Think of these as life rafts that help your body carry and metabolize simple carbohydrates: gingerbread, sugar cookies, or crackers. Your blood sugar and mood will thank you.” Do yourself and your gut a favor and make some oatmeal with flaxseeds, almond slices, and bananas to start your day off on the right foot, nosh on some nuts before you head out, and help yourself to some hummus and veggies as soon as you settle in at your soirée.  
     
    6. Enjoy yourself while eating mindfully
    PSA: Having guilt or shame over what you eat is much harder on the body than the actual bubbly and gingerbread cookies you’ve had one too many of. “Your body internalizes your thoughts and emotions, so practice gratitude, grace, compassion, and love to the best of your ability for your body and health, no matter the indulgences,” Brown said.  She also explained that your parasympathetic nervous system signals your body to “rest and digest.” To stimulate it along with your vagus nerve, which delivers information from the gut to the brain and aids in reducing stress, pair your favorite holiday indulgences with a side of mindfulness, deep breaths, and gratitude. Your body will be more relaxed and the pie you finished off will digest more easily (read: no tummy troubles). 
    Bottom line: Instead of passing on every dish that’s calling your name, enjoy every bite on your plate while still tuning into your hunger cues. And don’t sweat the extra calories or sugar—your body has your back and will take care of detoxing on its own.
     

    10 Habits Women Who Are Always in Shape Adopt During the Holidays More

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    People Are Taping Their Mouth While Sleeping—Here’s Why It’s Not Weird

    Since downloading TikTok a little over a year ago, I think I’ve learned more from one app than I ever did in school. I’ve learned that frost flowers exist (they’re beautiful, look them up), how to do everything better thanks to @brunchwithbabs, and what a day in the life of a sorority girl looks like during #BamaTok. 
    My most recent discovery? Taping your mouth closed while you sleep. I first learned about this hack from Chance Culp in a video where she said she doesn’t remember why she started taping her mouth shut at night but she feels like it’s improved her sleep. I’m lucky enough to usually sleep like a baby without any help (*humble brag*), I was still curious about the benefits of mouth taping. I continued my TikTok scroll to learn why other creators and experts swear by this trick, and it wasn’t long until I was convinced I needed to try it too. Read on to learn more about this wellness trend and why everyone’s including it in their nightly routine. 

    Why tape your mouth while you sleep?
    Before we talk about the benefits of mouth taping, it’s important to understand why it’s being done. And the answer is simple: to avoid breathing through your mouth. But aside from mouth breathing being unflattering and drying out your lips, why is it a problem? 
    According to Dr. Konstantin Pavlovich, who developed a functional breathing technique called the Buteyko Method in 1952, poor breathing can be linked to various physical, neurological, and respiratory conditions. Practicing functional breathing (breathing in and out through the nose into the diaphragm) rather than poor breathing (breathing through the mouth into the chest) has been shown to improve health issues such as asthma, rhinitis, hayfever, anxiety, stress, panic attacks, dental health, craniofacial development, ADHD, insomnia, snoring, and sleep apnea. 
    Founder & CEO of Hostage Tape, Alex Neist echoes this sentiment, saying 25-50% of the population breathes through their mouth during sleep. So if our mouths are opening, taping them shut promotes nose breathing, which then leads to a number of benefits that not only promote better sleep but better overall health. “Mouth taping can reduce or eliminate snoring and apnea for many people, increase oxygen intake and circulation so you have more energy when you wake up, help your diaphragm work properly which relaxes your body for less stress, help reduce inflammation, boost immune system, and reduce bad breath, tooth decay, and dry mouth,” Neist explained. 

    How to tape your mouth
    Before you give it a try, it’s important to learn the do’s and don’ts of taping your mouth. You’re not just sticking Scotch tape over your mouth. There are products specifically for mouth taping so it keeps your mouth closed through the night for your nose to breathe, but doesn’t feel restrictive or hurt to take off. Lalitha Bhowani-McSorley, lead physical therapist and sleep expert at Brentwood Physiotherapy Calgary, said the best type of tape to use when taping your mouth for sleep is a medical adhesive tape, such as surgical or micropore tape. “This type of tape holds firmly without sticking too much to the skin and causing discomfort, while also allowing enough breathability. It is important to note that it should be changed every time,” she said. 
    With mouth taping becoming a more widespread practice, companies are coming out with products to help. “There are companies that sell adhesive strips designed specifically for taping your mouth shut before bed. Other options include hypoallergenic and surgical tapes, which are commonly used on human skin,” says Dr. Katherine Hall, a sleep psychologist at Somnus Therapy. In addition to using the right type of tape to avoid irritation, it’s also important to apply the tape correctly. In this video, board-certified plastic surgeon Dr. Daniel Barrett recommends starting with a small piece of tape right in the center of your lips and gradually increasing the amount of tape used and surface area covered. If you experience difficulty sleeping or other issues related to mouth breathing, talk to your doctor to see if mouth taping may be right for you.

    My experience
    I wish I could say that better sleep and increased oxygen levels were the driving factors for me trying out this technique, but because I am admittedly a little vain, I was mostly influenced to tape my mouth after learning that mouth breathing can change the look and shape of your face. The possibility of it easing my anxiety was also a nice plus, so I was open to giving it a shot.
    As a chronic allergy and asthma sufferer, I was nervous to try taping my mouth shut at first because breathing is already tough for me. I assumed I would end up suffocating in my sleep, and while it was tough to breathe at first, that wasn’t the case. I struggled the first night and had to remove the tape a couple times to take a deep breath through my mouth, but eventually I got comfortable breathing through my nose. By the second night, it already felt natural to fall asleep breathing through my nose, and I continued to sleep well through the night without any of the stuffiness I usually experience. I was also pleasantly surprised that I didn’t find the tape uncomfortable or distracting while I slept. Most mornings I woke up and forgot it was even there. 

    Final verdict
    I can’t say that a few nights of taping my lips closed totally transformed my health, but it has reframed the way I think about my body. A majority of the health issues I face on a daily basis—anxiety, asthma, acid reflux, fatigue, and more—are side effects that can come from mouth breathing. While I do feel an improvement in these symptoms, I’m now more aware of how important it is to listen to your body and embrace its natural state, whether that’s focusing on your posture, breath, or gut health. Most often the answer to your health concerns is right under (or in this case, inside of) your nose. 

    Sleep-Care Is the New Self-Care: Here’s How You Should Upgrade Your Routine More

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    7 Steps to Declutter Your Mind For 2023

    Every time the new year comes around, we are bombarded with the notion to get ahead by mapping out our list of resolutions. Whether it’s committing to a new gym membership or getting out of financial debt, the new year is that blank slate (or Blank Space, if you’re a Swiftie) you’ve been waiting for. It makes for a great time to do personal reflection and check in with yourself. If you’re like me, your mind can be an incredibly challenging thing to slow down. Here are seven tips to hitting the refresh button mentally so you can declutter your mind and feel capable of taking on 2023.

    1. Look for ways to simplify
    Whether it’s committing to only a certain amount of appointments/commitments a week or getting rid of the clothes you don’t actually wear, find ways to make life easier on yourself. Life can be challenging, and while many things are out of your control, reflect on the habits you have control over. Are you looking for ways to create margin in life, or are you continuously overbooking your schedule? Life will look a whole lot better when you intentionally develop habits that bring you to a place of personal balance. 

    2. Romanticize sleep
    According to The Sleep Foundation, “Women have a lifetime risk of insomnia that is as much as 40% higher than men,” which is why cups of coffee probably sounds so good in the morning. In other words, we do–in fact–need our beauty sleep. So please pass the eye masks and satin pajamas. Prioritize better sleeping habits to make sure your body is reaching its full potential wellbeing. Limit screen time before bed so you can wind down mentally and prepare for snoozing. If going to bed sounds boring, create a personalized nighttime routine you love. After your skincare routine, put on your loungewear, turn on your essential oils diffuser, and curl up to read a good book. 

    3. Write down the “clutter”
    A great way to process your thoughts in a healthy way is by journaling. Even if you only have a few minutes, take a pen to paper or create a note in your phone where you’re able to dive into different thoughts you’ve been dealing with. Maybe you’re stressed and need to write about your work challenges, or maybe you’re grieving the loss of a close friend and need to let out the emotional trauma. Writing is a way of communication that helps us process our emotions through words so we’re able to release any ideas or beliefs we might be holding in our minds. Journaling is a healthy outlet, and it’s a safe place you can look back on as you move forward throughout different seasons.

    4. Make time for alone time
    As I like to say, take yourself out on a date. On the weekends when I’m able to get away from mom duties or home/work life, I love going to a local coffee shop, ordering a latte, and truly engaging with my environment without being interrupted or distracted by my phone. Set one day or different hour blocks throughout your week where you can do something just for you that brings you to life. We are often the most stressed when we haven’t had a chance to take a breather and step away from our schedule to invest in ourselves. Go to the nail appointment, see your dentist, shop for a new pair of boots, or simply relish a delicious croissant by yourself. Do something you love, and make a habit of it to make sure you’re taking care of you. 

    5. Leave the past in the past
    Maybe you went through a tough breakup this year or someone broke your trust. Maybe you struggled at work or made mistakes you regret. Sometimes we don’t deal with negative emotions properly, or we harbor them and let them manifest as unhealthy projections toward other people. Before stepping into a new year, take a moment to identify those negative emotions and do a heart check up. Start by asking yourself questions like: What events significantly impacted me negatively this year? What lies or limiting beliefs have I allowed myself to hold on to from those events that I need to let go of? 
    Whatever it may be, consider letting those things go to move on and truly heal. In order to show up for others, we must first always be willing to show up for ourselves. A new year doesn’t change the hurt. But it is a beautiful reminder that we can choose to start over again and–as my friend told me once–keep pursuing a healthy heart. 

    6. Get active
    There are so many resources and updated research that continuously affirm the importance of exercise. I’m obsessed with spinning and took a spin class at least 3-4 times a week (before having my first baby) because it always makes me feel amazing mentally. After exercise, we often feel clearer and are able to move stagnant energy making us feel stuck, not to mention those feel-good endorphins that get released when you move your body. Whether you love to go for a walk or take yoga class online after work, show your body some TLC by making exercise a priority for your mental health. Not only can movement improve your mood, but you’ll build strength–both physically and mentally.

    7. Do the small things right away
    As a working mom who has a chaotic schedule, one of the ways I’ve minimized what’s on my plate is by choosing to do things right away. Imagine it’s late at night and there’s a pile of dishes in the sink–you’re probably tempted to hold off until the next morning to wash it all. Instead, get in the habit of getting it done right away, or the next free moment you get. When we keep putting off those little things, we end up piling chores or responsibilities until we reach our breaking point, causing more stress and anxiety than if we just take care of it right away. If you have an extra five minutes in the morning before leaving for work, make your bed, drop off the rent payment, or make your next doctor’s appointment.
    Because life can be so busy, “I’ll get to it later” can sometimes set you up for forgetting the task in the long run, or add to your stress levels because you have a subconscious growing to-do list. Avoid the stress, and simply get it done when you can. You’ll be grateful you did it, and you’ll be mentally at ease for prioritizing it.

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    14 Books Every Woman In Their 20s Needs To Read

    I gotta be honest— as someone who’s about to turn 22, graduate college, and start life in the big and scary “real world”, I’m scared as hell. For as long as I can remember, I’ve listened to countless songs (“Nothing New” by T. Swift, “Ribs” by Lorde…if you know, you know), watched what feels like hundreds of movies and TV shows, and had a lot of conversations that all revolve around the same gist: your 20’s really are…well, somethin’ else. However, I’ve decided I don’t want to jump into this decade blindly accepting that it’ll be a sh*tshow—and I think a lot of gals in my boat are feeling the same way. 
    Lucky for us, there is no shortage of books to read that are here to help take this “figuring it out” era by the horns. Covering everything from friendships, self confidence, finance, sex, love, and literally everything in between, here are some must reads to make these daunting years be more a bit more fun and at least a little less dysfunctional.

    Michelle Andrews & Zara McDonald
    The Space Between
    If your 20’s are known for anything, it’s that weird gap between being a teenager and being a, like, real adult. While it’s wildly confusing, kind of lonely, and sometimes embarrassing, there’s also a whole lot of magic to be found in the chaos. Michelle Andrews and Zara McDonald, creators of the award-winning pop culture podcast Shameless, are two of the many twenty-something women just trying to make sense of it all. They don’t have all the answers. but they do know that mapping out our place in the world is a little bit easier when we do it together. Filled with comforting wit and brutal honesty, these are their personal stories from heartbreak and mental health challenges to overcoming career setbacks and letting go of fear—but there’s a good chance you’ll find pieces of yourself in there, too.

    Elif Batuman
    The Idiot
    Contrary to popular belief, not every must-read needs to be a non-fiction, self-help moment. In ‘The Idiot’, Selin, the daughter of Turkish immigrants, arrives for her freshman year at Harvard and signs up for classes in subjects she has never heard of, befriends her charismatic and worldly Serbian classmate, Svetlana, and, almost by accident, begins corresponding with Ivan, an older mathematics student from Hungary. Selin may have barely spoken to Ivan, but with each email they exchange, the act of writing seems to take on new and increasingly mysterious meanings. For Selin, this is a journey further inside herself: a coming to grips with the confusion of a first love, and with the growing consciousness that she may be bound to become a writer, even though that’s not what she’s envisioned for herself at all.

    Dolly Alderton
    Everything I Know About Love
    I think the cover of this book truly says it all. When it comes to the trials and triumphs of becoming an adult, journalist Dolly Alderton has seen and tried it all. In this memoir, she vividly recounts falling in love, finding a job, getting drunk, getting dumped, realizing that Ivan from the corner shop might just be the only reliable man in her life, and that no one can ever compare to her best girlfriends. This incredibly funny and occasionally heartbreaking book is everything we’ve ever needed regarding bad dates, good friends and—above all else— realizing that you are enough through all of the terrifying yet hopeful uncertainty.

    A Lonely Girl Is A Dangerous Thing
    Growing up is always hard, but especially when so many think you’re a washed-up has-been at twenty-two. Jena Chung, who was once a violin prodigy, is now a selfish, badly-behaved, full blown sex addict. Her professional life comprises of rehearsals, concerts, and relentless practice; her personal life is spent managing family demands, those of her creative friends, and obviously, lots of sex. But then, she meets Mark– and he sweeps her off her feet. Not only that, she gets the perfect internship with the New York Philharmonic at the same time. Thinking that she finally has the life she’s been dreaming of, everything is brought to a halt when Trump is elected and everything about New York, and herself, changes at the drop of a hat. Jena comes to learn that there are many different ways to live and love and that no one has the how-to guide for any of it–we’re all just trying to become the people we hope to be.

    Natasha Lunn
    Conversations on Love
    Love, while beautiful in all its forms, is really f’ing hard to comprehend and navigate. After years of feeling that love was always out of reach, journalist Natasha Lunn set out to understand how relationships work and evolve over a lifetime. She turned to having intimate conversations with authors and experts to learn about their experiences, as well as drawing on her own, asking how we find love, how we sustain it, and how we survive when we lose it. And we’re not just talking romantic— this richly layered novel covers the loneliness of loss, the psychology of being alone, parenthood, and more.

    Kiley Reid
    Such A Fun Age
    Alix is a woman who gets what she wants and has made a living, with her confidence-driven brand, showing other women how to do the same. So, she’s taken aback when her babysitter, Emira, is confronted while watching Alix’s toddler one night, walking the aisles of their local supermarket. The store’s security guard, seeing a young black woman out late with a white child, accuses Emira of kidnapping two-year-old Briar. Emira is furious and humiliated as it’s caught on video by bystanders, and Alix wants to do everything to make things right. As Emira has no clue what to do with her life, and the video brings forth some baggage from Alix’s past, both women find themselves on a crash course that will upend everything they think they know about themselves and one another. It flawlessly explores the stickiness of transactional relationships, what it means to make someone family, and the complicated reality of being a grown up through a story surrounding race and privilege.

    Alice Finn
    Smart Women Love Money
    One rude awakening of my twenties thus far is that I don’t know how to “be good” with money to save my life. If I only buy two $7 iced lattes in a week instead of five, that’s a win. However, this book takes the conversation beyond saving money and budgeting and introduces us to the power of investing. Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a successful wealth management adviser, Alice Finn shares five simple and proven strategies for a woman at any stage of their life, whether starting a career, staying home and raising children, or heading up a major corporation. She also provides the tools you need to achieve long-term success no matter what the markets are doing or what the headlines say. So even in the face of uncertainty, you’ll know how to thrive, earn, save, and grow your bag.

    Tara Schuster
    Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies
    There’s no rock bottom quite like drunk calling your therapist, and Tara Schuster can attest to that herself. By the time she was in her late twenties, Tara was a rising TV executive who had made a name for herself in the industry. By all appearances, she had mastered being an adult. But beneath that shiny image of success, she was a chronically anxious, self-medicating mess whose road to adulthood had been paved with depression, anxiety, and shame. In this story of Tara essentially re-parenting herself through simple daily rituals, she shares insight and advice she wishes she’d received in her early twenties: words that are candid, practical, and hilarious, while still teaching the importance of self-love and acceptance.

    Bianca Sparacino
    The Strength In Our Scars
    The process of healing is one that is indescribably hard to work through, but this book gives insight that can make each step of the way feel a bit more manageable. It tackles the gut-wrenching but relatable experiences of moving on and self-love through beautifully written poetry, prose, and compassionate encouragement you would expect only from someone who relates to the exact situation you’re going through. Ultimately, it comes together to show us that the things in our lives that leave scars do not destroy you—they are moments in which we survived, and in that is a sense of hope.

    Michelle Zauner
    Crying in H Mart
    As we grow, it can sometimes be easy to lose touch with where we came from. Michelle Zauner shares her story of growing up as one of the few Asian American kids at her school in Eugene, Oregon, and how that planted the seed for a need to forge her own identity. She touches on her struggles with her mother’s particular, high expectations of her and on a painful adolescence, yet also on the pureness of bonding with her mother and grandmother during those same years. As she grew up, moving away for college, finding work in the restaurant industry, and performing gigs with her fledgling band led her Korean heritage to feel ever more distant, even though she felt like she was finally discovering the life she wanted to live. However, after receiving news of her mother’s terminal cancer diagnosis while in her mid 20’s, Michelle had a reckoning with her identity and reclaimed the gifts of taste, language, and history her mother had given her.

    Mary Ann Sieghart
    The Authority Gap
    As many women enter the “real world” workforce in their early 20’s, being underestimated, under-appreciated, and underpaid is sadly a universal experience most of us will face, especially in male-dominated fields. Despite all of the progress we’ve made toward equality, we still fail, more often than we might realize, to take women as seriously as men. In this fascinating book, journalist Mary Ann Sieghart provides a startling perspective on the gender bias at work in our everyday lives and reflected in the world around us, whether in pop culture, media, school classrooms, or politics. With precision and insight, Sieghart gathers from a variety of disciplines—including psychology, political science, and sociology—and talks to pioneering women from a wide range of backgrounds to explore how gender bias intersects with race and class biases. Through her conversations and other findings, she offers insights on how to counteract systemic sexism and ways to narrow this toxic authority gap.

    Florence Given
    Women Don’t Owe You Pretty
    Say it with me: we don’t owe men sh*t, especially being pretty. Exploring all progressive corners of the feminist conversation from insecurity projection and refusing to find comfort in other women’s flaws, to deciding whether to date or dump them, all the way through to unpacking the male gaze and how it shapes our identity, this book really does not miss a beat. It’s an accessible leap into feminism for people at all stages of their journey who are seeking to reshape and transform the way they view themselves. In a world that tells women we’re either not enough or doing way too much, its time we stop directing our anger and insecurities onto ourselves, and start fighting back to reshape the structures of our toxic patriarchal society.

    Brianna Wiest
    101 Essays That Will Change the Way You Think
    This was actually the first self-help type of book I ever personally read, and I’m not being dramatic when I tell you that it quite literally changed my outlook on life. It’s been almost two years since then, and to this day, I still go back and read over some select essays when I feel like I need to. This compilation of Brianna Wiest’s published work features pieces on why you should pursue purpose over passion, embrace negative thinking, see the wisdom in daily routine, and become aware of the cognitive biases that are creating the way you see your life. You’ll find pieces of wisdom you’ve been waiting to hear for years, and even better—ones you had no clue you needed but are so grateful you found.

    Aminatou Sow & Ann Friedman
    Big Friendship: How We Keep Each Other Close
    While figuring out self-love and romance are definitely the big themes of your 20’s, the importance of genuine friendship cannot be forgotten. A close friendship is one of the most influential relationships a human life can contain, but for all the cutesy sentiments surrounding friendship, most people don’t talk much about what it really takes to stay close for the long haul. Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman tell the story of their equally messy and life-affirming “big friendship” in this honest and hilarious book that documents their first decade in one another’s lives through all of the joys and pitfalls.An inspiring testament to the power of society’s most underappreciated relationship, this book invites you to think about how your own bonds are formed, challenged, and preserved, and when it’s time to fight for them or let them go.

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    It Gets a Bad Rap, but Bread Actually Might Be an Underrated Superfood–Here’s Why

    In a diet culture where fad diets reign supreme, bread has become demonized for its high carbohydrate (and gluten) content and been avoided by the wellness-obsessed for supposedly contributing to weight gain. While carbohydrate-heavy foods–namely bread–have been ingrained as public enemy #1 when it comes to healthy eating or achieving goals like gut health, I think Oprah speaks for us all when she emphatically expressed her love for it in a now-viral TV commercial (see: “I love bread” Oprah memes). So there’s no question that bread delivers on the deliciousness factor, but is it really that bad for your health that you should substitute it for low-carb or gluten-free alternatives? Or could bread actually be…good for you?
    I asked registered dietitians to weigh in and finally put the long-running debate to rest. Read on to find out what they had to say. Spoiler: Bread is not the enemy. It’s time to brush up on those bread-making skills—your gut health may thank you.
     

    Health benefits of bread
    It turns out that other than just satisfying a craving, noshing on certain types of bread can prevent a major case of FOMO—that is, missing out on key nutrients. “Bread can be beneficial to gut health because of the array of fibers, vitamins, and minerals that are found in certain breads,” explained Johna Burdeos, a registered dietitian. “Fiber in particular is essential for optimal gut health. Think of fiber as nature’s broom for the gut—it helps soften stool and get it moving along the digestive tract.” Wirtz pointed out that bread made with whole grains is rich in dietary fiber and prebiotics, AKA compounds that feed the good bacteria in your gut and promote a better environment for the bacteria to thrive on.
    But the health benefits don’t stop there. “Bread can also be a source of resistant starch, which is a kind of starch that can’t be broken down by digestive enzymes,” conveyed Kim Kulp, a registered dietitian nutritionist and owner of the Gut Health Connection. “This undigested starch then ends up in the large intestine where the microbes break it down and produce compounds that decrease inflammation, train our immune system, and protect the lining of the gut.” Of course, bread shouldn’t be the only source of fiber and prebiotics you consume (fruits and veggies are also essential sources of fiber!), but rest-assured, bread packs in more gut-boosting nutrients than diet culture lets on.
    Sure, bread is higher in carbohydrates than protein or fat, but foods high in carbohydrates are an important part of a healthy diet as carbohydrates fuel the body with energy used to support bodily functions and physical activity. What’s more, certain breads are made up of complex carbohydrates—the aforementioned fiber and starchy goodness—that take longer to digest, preventing blood sugar spikes. So you can have your bread and eat it too!

    What about gluten–isn’t it bad for you?
    Going gluten-free seems to be considered the best thing since sliced bread, but is gluten—a protein found in some grains, including wheat, barley, and rye—really that unhealthy? “With Celiac disease—an autoimmune disease that causes damage to the small intestine when gluten is consumed—steadily increasing, also came a large trend in non-Celiac individuals avoiding gluten,” explained Mary Wirtz, a registered dietitian and consultant for Mom Loves Best. It’s important to differentiate between people who are allergic or sensitive to gluten and those who steer clear of it because they believe it’s unhealthy. Of course, gluten is not beneficial if you have Celiac or another sensitivity, and if your body feels better without it, work with your doctor or nutritionist to build a diet sans gluten and fill in nutritional gaps, just like you would any food allergy of an otherwise nutritious food, such as eggs and nuts. 
    However, for those who ditch gluten because they categorize it as a “bad” food, they may want to think twice. As with any health trend, a low-carb or gluten-free diet should be taken with a grain (pun intended) of salt. Just because a way of eating is trendy, it doesn’t mean it’s right for you (always listen to your gut—literally and figuratively).
    Research suggests only 6% of the population is gluten intolerant and about 1% has Celiac. For the rest of us? Gluten-containing products like bread can be a part of a nutritious diet. In fact, swearing off gluten altogether (if you don’t have any of the aforementioned conditions) can lead to missing out on nutritious whole grains, fiber, and micronutrients. Also, gluten-free processed foods are often lower in nutrients and higher in sugar (always check the ingredients!). Bottom line: Despite gluten’s bad rap, gluten-free doesn’t equal healthier, unless you have an allergy or intolerance to it.

    What type of bread should you opt for?
    Not all breads are created equal. Just like all other store-bought foods, some products contain minimally-processed and nutrient-rich ingredients while other products are highly-processed and void of nutrients. As a general rule of thumb, Burdeos suggested opting for whole grain breads (think: 100% whole wheat), which consist of the entire grain, including the parts most concentrated with fiber, antioxidants, B vitamins, and healthy fats, as opposed to refined grains (i.e. conventional white bread, processed bakery items, etc.) that strip a lot of the nutrients away. “When buying bread, look at the ingredients to make sure the first ingredient says whole wheat,” Kulp affirmed. “If the word “whole” isn’t there, then the fiber has been removed.” 
    Another expert favorite? Good ol’ sourdough. Wirtz explained that some research suggests that sourdough bread acts as a prebiotic to feed the gut bacteria. Because it undergoes a fermentation process, eating sourdough bread allows better digestion, promotes higher nutritional uptake of minerals and vitamins, and improves gut health. The main takeaway? Not every type of bread will be high in nutrients, but that doesn’t mean you have to keep it at arm’s length in order to have a healthy diet.
     

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    Stressed RN? You Need To Hear This Psychologist’s Tips for Managing The Holidays

    Behind the tinsel, fa-la-la-la-las, visions of dancing sugarplums, and feel-good Christmas movies is the harsh truth: The most wonderful time of the year is also the most stressful. Before you write me off as the grinch (my ugly-sweater-wearing dachshund proves otherwise), it’s no secret that holiday stress is real. Need I mention the work rush before the holiday break, mad dashes to the mall and airport, and eating all the cookies in sight? Add to that your bank account feeling the pain from extra Starbucks runs, gift exchanges, party hopping, and playing hostess with the mostest. 
    In a recent survey of over 1,000 people across the U.S., more than one-third of respondents said their biggest concern about the holidays this year is finances, followed by worry or anxiety, maintaining healthy habits, general busyness/feeling overextended, and feelings of sadness/grief/loss. The silver lining? I asked Dr. Beth Pausic, Director of Behavioral Health at health brand, Hims & Hers, to share her Scrooge-proof tips to combat the top holiday stressors. Take notes for making this season (actually) merry and bright.

    Meet the expert
    Dr. Beth Pausic
    Clinical Psychologist and Director of Behavioral Health at Hims & Hers.
    Dr. Beth Pausic is a clinical psychologist and Director of Behavioral Health at Hims & Hers. Dr. Pausic has worked in senior roles at several behavioral healthcare startups. Her experience prior to working in telebehavioral health includes over 15+ years as a Clinical Administrator and Provider in clinical settings.

    Make a plan for your finances
    Playing Santa isn’t all fun and games. Sure, gift-giving has its perks (seeing your BFF’s  expression when she opens the red light therapy wand you scored for her: priceless), but with the social expectations associated with checking everyone off your nice list, not to mention the inflation we’re battling, it can feel like your wallet can’t catch a break. So how can you avoid a Grinchmas? “The most important thing to do is set a realistic budget for yourself,” Dr. Pausic stated. “Don’t overextend yourself and make your financial problems worse. Be honest about what you can and can’t spend.” And consider alternatives to the usual material gifts, like experiences (think: a fitness or cooking class), plants, DIY goodies (coffee scrub and bath bombs, anyone?), or your time. Talk about gifts that keep on giving!
    Dr. Pausic also suggested being open and honest with others about your limits on exchanging gifts or participating in social events. “Having conversations about finances with friends and family can be anxiety-provoking and feel awkward, but if it’s something you’re worried about during the holidays, it’s worth bringing up,” she affirmed. “It’s not easy to allow yourself to be vulnerable and honest when you are in a challenging financial situation, but you are taking better care of yourself by sharing your concerns.” That’s what I call self-care. 

    Set boundaries in advance
    While worry is a normal everyday emotion we all experience, there’s no denying that the holiday season can add an extra layer of stress (holiday madness is a thing). Because anxiety can present itself in different ways and at varying levels of intensity, continuously having check-ins with yourself, paying attention to your body cues, and increasing awareness of your anxiety triggers can make the difference between a meltdown and a jolly holiday. “If possible, minimize or avoid triggers,” Dr. Pausic advised. “If that isn’t possible, have a plan to address your anxiety by minimizing your exposure to these triggers by removing yourself from the situation, setting limits, and having strategies to help reduce your anxiety in tougher moments.”
    Dr. Pausic recommended trying the usual suspects: deep breathing, meditation, and mindfulness. Schedule time for consistent, preventative self-care to help keep tabs on your anxiety and alleviate the effects of it on a regular basis, just like you would your exercise routine. 

    Maintain (some) healthy habits
    Keeping up with your healthy eating and workout regimen is hard enough on any given day, but throw in frigid temps, packed calendars, and temptations everywhere you turn, and the holidays can make even the healthiest women forego their favorite routines. First off, Dr. Pausic pointed out that we’re inclined to become more sedentary during the winter months, so give yourself a break, but do your best to remain active and–if possible–aim to get some level of physical activity several days a week. Adapt your sweat sessions to the winter months by opting for slower, low-impact sweat sessions, like Pilates or yoga. Your body will thank you. 
    So you’ve got holiday soirée after holiday soirée for the foreseeable future, which means food and drinks galore and not enough quality Zzzs. Keep in mind that it’s not all or nothing—instead of swearing off gingerbread cookies and spiked eggnog, enjoy every bite and sip, and listen to your hunger signs. “While you don’t want to deprive yourself, there can be a fine line between holiday indulgence and holiday excess,” Dr. Pausic expressed. “Be mindful if you are eating or drinking more, and plan when you want to indulge and other days when you are a bit more conservative.” And prioritize those 7-9 hours of quality sleep every night to improve your mood, strengthen your immune system, relieve stress, and maintain a healthy weight. Cold and flu season, who?  

    Take frequent breaks
    From Christmas shopping and white elephant exchanges to holiday travel and family get-togethers—on top of maintaining your “normal” schedule—it’s only natural to feel overwhelmed right now. “If you find yourself feeling stressed about these things instead of enjoying them, it is time to take a break,” Dr. Pausic conveyed. “Don’t agree to every invitation and set realistic expectations for all of your activities during the season. It may seem impossible, but you can say “no”—and don’t forget to take care of yourself.”
    Enter: setting boundaries, letting go of “shoulds,” and embracing JOMO. Politely decline any social gatherings that you’d say “yes” to for the sole purpose of satisfying an obligation. Instead of throwing your usual Friendsmas only because your best pals are expecting you to, ask if someone else can take the reins (pun intended). And just because everyone around you is celebrating by decking the halls and baking cookies, you don’t have to partake. Do what feels good for you—even if that means not celebrating at all. Bottom line: Put yourself first. 

    Hold space for all emotions
    Despite this time of year’s theme of holiday cheer, the holidays have a way of intensifying existing feelings of sadness, loss, and grief. “When we are constantly being exposed to images of happiness, family, and being together, it can make your own grief feel even deeper and loss can feel more apparent,” Dr. Pausic explained. “It is OK to acknowledge that getting through the holidays may be hard for you.” You aren’t the only one feeling this way. 
    Whether you’re facing the loss of a loved one, family stress, a recent breakup, or not going home for the holidays, make space for all your emotions, give yourself grace, and don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself to feel happy. Dr. Pausic listed ways to help ease feelings of sadness/grief/loss:

    Be around others who are supportive
    Consider volunteering some of your time helping others
    Feel what you are feeling. Grief is normal. Don’t force yourself to feel any differently.
    Acknowledge the grief and loss that you are experiencing. Don’t tell yourself or others that you are fine if you aren’t.
    Plan out self-care and coping strategies that work best for you. While it is important to define these for yourself, some examples may be taking a walk, spending time with a friend, trying a new activity, getting some sun, and exercise.
    Reach out to your support network
    Consider talking to a mental health professional
    Be compassionate towards yourself 

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    I Tried the Taylor Swift Treadmill Workout for a Week—Here’s What Happened

    If there’s one thing you should know about me, it’s that I hate cardio: cycling, HIIT workouts, running–you name it, I hate it. And there’s nothing in the world that can make me do it willingly…except Taylor Swift apparently. When I first saw the Taylor Swift treadmill workout trend on TikTok, I thought to myself “That looks fun,” then immediately questioned “Who am I, and since when does cardio look fun?” But because I’m a Swiftie and I do enjoy walking, I decided to ditch my usual strength training workouts to give the Taylor workout a try for a week. Read on to find out what the workout entails, what happened when I tried it, and whether it’s worth trying for yourself.  

    The workout
    The workout, created by TikTok star Allie Bennett, is simple. All you have to do is walk (or strut, according to Allie) to the beat of her carefully curated playlists. Each playlist starts off with upbeat warm-up songs, then continues with a couple faster-paced songs perfect for running or fast walking, and ends with a slow song or two for the cool down. Pro tip: Make sure the playlist isn’t on shuffle so that the songs play in the correct order. Find your pace to the first song and increase your speed by .1 MPH every time the song changes. The result is a half-hour workout with a mix of low and high-impact exercises customizable to your fitness level and music taste.

    @benntheredonethat
    Replying to @norahhlouise the treadmill strut that started it all is back and BETTER THAN EVER BABY !! this TSTS has TWO running options (bc we all know all too well deserves its own moment 🧣) – let me know if you try this one out !! @benntheredonethat #treadmillstrut #taylorswift
    ♬ hour long taylor swift treadmill strut workout – allie bennett

    My experience
    I started off with Allie Bennett’s original Taylor Swift treadmill workout playlist. At first, I was nervous to strut in front of a bunch of strangers at the gym and had trouble finding the right speed for the first few songs (because not only am I a treadmill amateur, I also have no rhythm), but once I heard “Better Than Revenge,” I started hitting my stride. Despite the fact that the running songs on this playlist—“Shake it Off” and “…Ready For It?”—are some of my favorite hype songs, I was still too nervous to try running, so I kept my pace at a fast walk. The best part of the workout? Strutting to “Style” for the final song. Talk about main character energy. 
    Allie recently released a Midnights treadmill strut playlist, so I knew I had to try that one next since I’ve been listening to the album non-stop for the last two months. I was able to find my pacing much quicker and easier this time, but I still found it hard to stay on beat when each song would slow down during the bridge. This made me think the Midnights album might not be the best to strut to, but I pushed through and even tried (emphasis on “tried”) running to “The Great War.” All the TikToks I’ve seen make it look so fun and easy to run along to Taylor Swift songs, but in full disclosure, I only lasted about two minutes before I had to go back to a fast walk. I was proud of myself for trying though, since I can’t even remember the last time I ran. 
    I rounded things out by trying Allie’s hour-long Taylor Swift treadmill strut playlist. The idea of an hour-long cardio session seemed daunting at first, but after a successful first two days I was interested to see how this workout would go. And it didn’t disappoint. Before I knew it, I was three songs in and reminiscing about high school while strutting along to “Picture To Burn.” I didn’t look at the tracks beforehand, so it was exciting to anticipate what song would come on next, especially when I was surprised with a “Delicate” remix I’d never heard before. This playlist had two different options for the running portion: either “All Too Well (10 minute version)” or “Haunted,” “Out of the Woods,” and “Mr. Perfectly Fine.” Because I’m a true Swiftie, I chose to run during “All Too Well,” but I did more of a five-minute version because, again, I’m out of practice. 

    The verdict
    While I won’t be training for a marathon anytime soon, I can confidently say I’m a cardio convert thanks to Allie Bennett and her Taylor Swift treadmill strut workout. One of the reasons I’ve shied away from the treadmill in the past is because I easily get bored on it, even if I’m watching a show or listening to my favorite podcast. After five minutes, I’d find myself checking the clock to see how much time I had left, but that wasn’t the case with this workout. Focusing on walking to the beat and singing along to some of my favorite songs helped me think about something other than the fact that I was working out. Not only did that make the workout more enjoyable, but it also made it feel like time flew by.
    I also enjoyed how customizable the workout was. Since the intention of them is to walk to the beat, there’s no pressure to walk at a specific speed because everyone’s pace will vary based on their height. Similarly, I like that the running songs can also be fast walk songs if you’d prefer. I’m looking forward to trying out some of the other treadmill strut playlists (crossing my fingers for a Reputation version), and I’ll definitely be incorporating this workout into my gym routine.

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