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    TV Producer, Actress And Author Tshiamo Modisane On How Writing Her Debut Book Liberated Her

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    Earlier this year, TV Producer, actress and author Tshiamo Modisane released a memoir that detailed her journey to healing from past hurts and traumas. Growing up, Tshiamo always felt that she was born in the wrong body and assigned the wrong biological gender. True freedom finally showed up at her door when she changed her name from ‘Kgosi’ to ‘Tshiamo’ and embraced womanhood entirely – this, despite the rejection she faced from loved ones.

    On penning I Am Tshiamo: My Journey To Self-Acceptance and Womanhood, she says: “I call it my shedding and healing phase. I cried so much while writing this book. I wanted to be as honest and authentic as I could possibly be. I understood that this was a God-given assignment and thus needed to be treated with the respect it deserved.” Was she ready to relive some of the past hurts? Certainly not, she admits. “In all honesty, I wrote most of the book scared. But nothing could’ve prepared me for the warm feedback I’ve received from all corners of the country and world.” Below, she lets us into her wellness routine.

    READ MORE: How Curiosity Led Mpoomy Ledwaba To A Fulfilling Career

    Best way to start my day…

    With prayer, a scripture reading then, depending on the weather, I will step outside to work out – something I really love doing. When that’s done, I tackle emails, calls and deadlines. On a really good day, I usually sneak in a lunch or dinner.

    Best way to shake off a bad day…

    A good worship song, church sermon and long phone call with my manager-friend Makgotso Kgooe usually lift me out of a bad space. And if any of these don’t work, a cuddle session with my two fur babies – Oreo and Pompom – over a series definitely does the trick. 

    Go-to quick, favourite, healthy meal…

    I’m obsessed with grilled fish or a Thai chicken salad. There’s never a week that goes by where I don’t find myself face-deep into a Nandos chicken salad. In 2021, after arriving at the decision that I needed to write my book – as part of my healing journey I made the decision to cleanse myself off red meat and follow a strictly pescatarian diet. This helped me heal both physically and spiritually. My weight dropped to a size that I’d always desired.

    READ MORE: Queen Modjadji’s Breakout Star Masutang Rasekele On Life, Wellness And Finally Living Her Dream

    Wellness rule that you secretly break all the time…

    Sugar! I have a sweet tooth and I won’t even lie about it. It’s a trait I inherited from my late mother. I will deny myself any and everything except a slice of cake or ice cream [chuckles].

    If you could bottle up any personality trait of yours and sell it as a wellness product, what would it be?

    Attention to detail. I always aim to do everything right. During workouts, form and technique are important to me. Kindness too – I believe the key to healthy skin is found in being kind to people.

    What’s one weird healthy food combo that you swear by, even though everyone else thinks it’s gross?

    I don’t have one. I do, however, believe in not skipping breakfast. Whenever I skip breakfast, I find that I’m less effective and tend to even do fewer workouts in the gym.

    Assign a song to your morning routine… 

    Say A Little Prayer by Aretha Franklin. It literally sums up my mood every morning. I always imagine myself singing it for my baby – with my husband in the shower singing it too. 

    READ MORE: Actress Temi Otedola On Why She Prefers A Simple Wellness Routine

    Road running, weight lifting or yoga/Pilates – which one would you marry, date and ditch? And why?

    Marry: Weight-lifting. Nothing gets you that sculpted, toned body like weight-lifting. It also just reminds me that I AM THAT GIRL!

    Date: Road running. I am a dog mom, that just means endless walks that often end up with me chasing after my fur babies.  

    Ditch: Yoga. I can never get the flow right which stresses me because I have rhythm. Apart from the breathing techniques that I’ve now adopted into my daily routine, the flow of things always has me stuck between child and lotus pose.

    Skincare routine that you swear by…

    Serums! Your skin will thank you. That paired with minding your business and drinking water will set you on the right path [chuckles]. I chop and change between serums, but my top three favourites are Neutrogena’s Hydro Boost Supercharged Serum, Estée Lauder Advanced Night Repair Face Serum and the Lancôme Advanced Génifique Youth Activating Concentrate. More

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      How Nomzamo Mbatha Is Nurturing Good Wellness Habits

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      You’d have to be on a different level of stubborn to spend hours chatting up a storm with award-winning actress, Shaka iLembe executive producer and humanitarian Nomzamo Mbatha and not be inspired to change your eating habits. The 35-year-old, who happens to be on the cover of our July/August 2025 edition – is very clear about one thing: she believes in mindful eating so that she can have license to indulge when the moment calls for it. Four years ago, a life-changing diagnosis (more on this in the new issue) saw her overhaul her lifestyle choices. Below, she shares a few of the wellness practices that have her living her best life!

      READ MORE: The Confidence Issue Just Dropped – And Nomzamo’s Got It On Lock

      On Her Favourite Dish…

      “Oooh chiiiild, don’t put pasta in front of me [chuckles]. I’m generally good at pasta dishes and usually make all my pasta sauces from scratch. Honestly, I can make any pasta dish – from the simplest to the most complicated Italian pasta dishes. My favourite is a vodka pasta dish, pink in colour, that I picked up on one of my travels – it has no vodka, though! I’m also good at rice dishes too – and make a mean fish.”

      On Preferring Natural Remedies…

      “For instance, I’m gluten intolerant, but really don’t mind taking a gamble with pasta. I usually chew on ginger afterwards to help with any discomfort. I do love natural ingredients and homoeopathic remedies, even though I take conventional supplements. My friends always joke that I’m a walking pharmacy [chuckles]. I’m currently on a hair supplement called Nutrafol, which is great for hair; then hyaluronic acid for skin; vitamin C, elderberry and zinc for my immune system because I’m exposed to so many different climates during my travels. I’m also on collagen and probiotics. In fact, every woman should be on probiotics!”

      READ MORE: The Exact Supplements Women Need To Be Taking, According To Studies

      On Her Relationship With Meat…

      “I’m not a big meat person. I find it chewy and it makes me feel heavy. I’ve read that we have to listen to how our bodies react to certain foods – that if something makes you feel lethargic, then your body’s probably not digesting it.” 

      On The Lessons Learnt During Her 72-hour Water Fasts…

      “I can be disciplined, if I choose to be. I sometimes rest on my laurels when it comes to my body and health because I know I’m blessed with good genes and muscle memory. However, my body is my investment. I have to take care of it. The nature of my career calls for me to always be in the best form possible and impact – so I have to be very mindful of how I treat myself, my body and my skin.”

      On The Wildest Form Of Training She’s Tried To Date…

      “I dabble in Lagree from time to time, a high-intensity workout that strengthens and reshapes muscles. The class I take is called ‘The Shake’ because literally everything shakes when you’re in there [chuckles]. You know how Pilates uses a slim reformer? Lagree is performed on a megaformer, where you do slow movements of three in and out. It’s the most intense thing. It makes you feel so out of shape. For the next two to three days straight, your muscles are still moving on their own.”

      READ MORE: In-Flight Skincare Secrets A Dermatologist Refuses To Gatekeep

      On Self-Care During Her Travels…

      “I’ve become very clever in that whenever I have to travel for work, I always give myself two to three free days to acclimatise – find some cute coffee shops or a little restaurant to spend time alone, especially if it’s a city that I’ve never been to. I also battle with water retention during my travels so I always book a deep tissue massage for some lymphatic system drainage. If it doesn’t work, it is what it is!”

      ​​On The One Thing She Never Skimps On…

      “I don’t mess around with my hydration, especially when I’m travelling because my skin suffers a lot. I believe in electrolytes, but any electrolyte brand that is too sweet can miss me (no shade!). I’m a big fan of the electrolyte brand Metagenics, especially the lemon flavour. Lemon has a way of encouraging you to drink water because it’s quite refreshing. I also activate my water with coarse salt for maximum hydration benefits. Other times, I add chlorophyll drops to my water and MCT drops to my coffee to get that brain food that helps me function – especially during my 72-hour water fasts.”

      On Her Love For Salads…

      “They’re so filling and good for my gut, too!. You know how people judge Kourtney Kardashian for loving salads? I’m like, ‘That’s because you don’t know good salads. Do you know how versatile salads can be?’ Babe, I’m out here spending $22 (R390) everyday on a salad at a Sweetgreen – a U.S. salad chain with 40 ingredients to choose from that aims to get people excited about eating their greens. Sweetgreen has really taken my love for salads to another level. I’m now the trusted salad queen among her family and friends. My dream is to actually open a salad bar because we don’t have a salad culture here at home.” 

      Read Nomzamo Mbatha’s full cover story in the July/August 2025 issue of Women’s Health (Confidence Issue) on shelves now – or get the digital copy. Happy reading! More

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      What Is Oxidative Stress? Causes And How To Reduce It, According To Experts

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      When you think of stress, you might turn to the family drama that kept you from sleeping at night or an overwhelming, heart-racing panic about an anxiety-inducing work project. However, there could be another type of stress occurring in your body that you likely aren’t aware of, and it has some long-term health effects. Fortunately, there are ways to reduce it and keep your body healthy.Oxidative stress, also sometimes called oxidative damage, is an imbalance of free radicals and antioxidants in the body that can have a negative effect on your cells and tissues. As a result, this can increase your risk of chronic diseases, according to rheumatologist Richard Loeser. Those can include cancer, diabetes, arthritis, heart disease, Alzheimer’s and other inflammatory conditions.Meet the experts: Richard Loeser, MD, a rheumatologist and director of the Thurston Arthritis Research Center at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. Trevor Cates is a naturopathic physician in Utah and the founder of The Spa Dr. skincare line. Thara Vayali is a naturopathic physician in Vancouver and the co-founder and Chief Medical Officer of the women’s wellness brand hey freya. Melinda Ring, MD, is the Director of the Osher Center for Integrative Health at Northwestern University.What Are Free Radicals?Free radicals are unstable oxygen molecules created from the body’s normal functions, like metabolising food, says naturopathic physician Thara Vayali. They can also come from environmental exposures, like spending too much time in the sun without skin protection, adds naturopathic physician Trevor Cates. Free radicals do their damage in your body when there aren’t enough antioxidants to keep them in check, explains Vayali.That might sound scary, but free radicals aren’t all bad – it’s the amount of them that determines the extent of the damage, says Loeser. A certain amount of free radicals are necessary to keep our bodies functioning normally, but it’s “when these become increased to excessive levels that oxidative stress occurs,” he says. That’s when you’re in danger of those chronic health issues.The concept of oxidative stress has been a topic in the health industry for decades, but current discussions in the news about preventing chronic disease make paying attention to oxidative stress more important than ever. Here’s what to know about oxidative stress, including how it occurs and how to fight it, according to experts.Why Oxidative Stress Can Be Damaging To The BodyIn a nutshell, free radicals are unstable molecules that are missing an electron. To get the right amount of electrons to be complete, they might take them from other complete molecules in your body. In the process, they damage those complete molecules.That’s why free radicals need antioxidants, which normally neutralise free radicals by providing an electron, says Vayali. The body needs both free radicals and antioxidants, but having too many free radicals creates oxidative stress, Dr. Loeser says.Oxidative stress occurs through:AgeingThe natural process of getting older (unfortunately) produces free radicals. Oxidative damage can also speed up the ageing process. The damage accumulates and can cause age-related disease earlier in life.DietThe body needs healthy, antioxidant-rich food, like colourful fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds and spices, to maintain a healthy balance between free radicals and antioxidants, says Melinda Ring.READ MORE: What Is The 30 Plants Per Week Challenge?Environmental ExposuresChemicals and pollution can be found in our air, water, (ultraprocessed) food, alcohol, personal care products, and cleaning products, Cates says. After encountering these, your body will repair damage from the exposure – but it forms free radicals in the process, leading to oxidative stress, she says.Excessive UVSpending too much time exposed to UV rays without proper protection can cause skin damage from oxidative stress. That shows up as sunburn, premature ageing, hyperpigmentation and even skin cancer, says Cates.How Do You Know If You Have Oxidative StressUnfortunately, there’s no way to know for sure if you have oxidative stress because there are no specific symptoms, Dr. Loeser says. Some signs could include inflammation, aches, chronic pain and wrinkles, but having these symptoms doesn’t necessarily mean you have oxidative damage. And when someone develops a chronic condition like cancer, there’s no definitive way to prove that it was caused entirely by oxidative stress, Vayali adds. Still, there are ways to control oxidative stress in your body.How To Reduce Oxidative Stress1. Eat an antioxidant-rich diet.While your body naturally produces antioxidants, consuming additional antioxidants through your diet is “the best way” to combat oxidative stress with our current understanding of it, says Dr. Loeser.Any naturally colourful fruit, vegetable, or legume is likely a quality source of antioxidants, Cates says. She recommends consuming at least three to seven servings of colourful vegetables and one to two servings of colourful fruits, legumes and grains daily.Cates recommends adding these foods into your diet because they’re the most antioxidant-rich:Blueberries

      Black beans

      Wild salmon

      Pomegranate seeds

      Turmeric

      Walnuts

      Chia seeds

      FlaxseedsREAD MORE: How To Add More Vegetables To Your Diet, Even If You’re Busy2. Get enough sleep.Having a sufficient amount of rest, between seven and nine hours per night, can help repair the body, especially with oxidative stress, says Vayali. The brain’s glymphatic system, a “sanitation system that cleans up those free radicals,” only works when you’re sleeping, she says. So, make sure you’re getting those Zzz’s in – they don’t call it beauty sleep for nothing.READ MORE: Fall Asleep Faster With These 7 Hacks For Better Sleep3. Avoid environmental exposures as much as possible.Staying away from alcohol, ultraprocessed foods, environmental pollutants, and excessive UV will decrease chronic inflammation caused by excess free radicals, says Vayali. Tweaking your lifestyle to make healthier choices when possible – like avoiding time in direct sun and exposure to chemicals in cleaning products – can help maintain a healthy balance between antioxidants and free radicals, says Cates.Remember, oxidative stress is bound to occur in your body within the shuffle of everyday life, and some is okay. Just find little ways to minimise oxidative stress and keep excess free radicals in check to help your body do what it needs to do for you.This article by Kaitlyn Luckoff was originally published on Women’s Health US. More

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      Soft Girl Autumn: 6 Ways To Maintain Your Routine & Stay Active In The Cold

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      Bad news, babe: the weather has officially become nippier, the days shorter, and summer is on her last legs. To make the transition softer, might we introduce you to soft girl autumn? It’s a form of autumn self-care – popularised on social media – that helps soften the landing from summer to harsh, icy winter.We’re only in the second quarter of the year, but many people are already reporting feelings of burnout and fatigue. A new report finds that 62% of call centre workers are burnt out from pursuing aggressive quotas. A Gallup report shows that 36% of South African workers experience “excessive daily stress”.Why Autumn Self-Care MattersWhile there isn’t always much we can do to lessen our responsibilities, there is plenty we can do to protect our physical and mental health. Self-care is one of the best things you can do when feeling tired, overwhelmed or stressed. Looking after your body and mind has significant health benefits – it’s easier than you think! Self-care doesn’t necessarily mean a day at the spa; it can be a nutritious snack, a few relaxing moments in the bathtub or an hour with a good book.We’re constantly told to eat clean, exercise daily, manage stress, get enough sleep, and somehow glow while doing it all. But when we skip a workout or reach for something quick and comforting to eat, it can leave us feeling like we’ve failed.This perfectionist mindset can be more harmful than helpful, says Karen Bester, Medical Training Manager at Lamelle Pharmaceuticals. “Health doesn’t have to mean getting everything right all the time. It’s about consistency, doing the little things regularly that support your body and mental well-being. Progress, not perfection, is what leads to lasting change.”READ MORE: Why Is Everyone Buzzing About ‘Dopamine Menus’?So, Where Do You Start?Start small and stay kind to yourself by picking one or two habits you can realistically stick with. It might look like taking a short walk in the morning, drinking more water, or building a simple bedtime routine that includes a nurturing skincare regimen. These soft girl autumn self-care tips will help:Maintain A Consistent RoutineAccording to Northwestern Medicine, routines improve your health by providing structure and organisation. A good routine can help manage stress, improve sleep and diet and exercise. Consistency in sleep, meals, and physical activity helps regulate your body’s internal clock, which is especially beneficial during the shorter daylight hours of winter.READ MORE: How To Turn Those Forgotten Resolutions Into Attainable GoalsPrioritise Natural LightLimited sunlight in winter can lead to decreased serotonin levels, affecting mood and energy. Spending time outdoors during daylight hours, even on cloudy days, can help mitigate these effects. Your move: step outside first thing with a warm cup of tea or throw open the curtains and meditate in the morning light. Up before sunrise? Consider a daylight therapy lamp, which wakes you up with gentle, bright light to stimulate alertness.Schedule Exercise – RegularlyPencil it in. Make a date. Tick it off the list. Regular movement is the key to maintaining health in colder months. Regular exercise not only elevates mood and boosts energy levels but also supports immune function. Whether you prefer indoor workouts like yoga and stretching or outdoor activities such as brisk walking, staying active is crucial. Even short, daily sessions can have a notable impact.See Your FriendsLike, actually see them. Studies have demonstrated that having a robust support network and actively engaging in social interactions can significantly contribute to lessening negative mental health symptoms. Make it cute: schedule a spa day with DIY masks, nail art and more. Or, read that book together you’ve been eyeing and make PPTs unpacking the best parts.Get MindfulWhether it’s taking ten minutes to be screen-free to stare at a swaying tree branch or to do some manifesting in the shower, mindfulness is a powerful tool to encourage yourself, reduce stress and improve mood. Can’t find the motivation to go for a run? Cue a meditating playlist, then step outside and get going!READ MORE: Time For A Training Overhaul? Here’s How To Know When To Change Your RoutineRomanticise The Small ThingsTurns out, romanticising your life by engaging in soft girl autumn self-care routines can yield mental health benefits – no filter needed. It’s all about adding rose-tinted lenses to the mundane, kind of like imagining your life is a montage from Breathless. According to experts, this positive mindset can help you find joy in everyday things. Ideas:Light a candle

      Burn incense

      Buy yourself flowers and smell them

      Curate a playlist and play it

      Add colour to your journal with coloured pencils

      Hang lavender or eucalyptus in your shower

      Take your time slathering on body oil

      Pick a colour and take a photo everytime you see it. (Beige in sand, croissants, wooden floors, curtains!)

      Focus on your senses during meals

      Make your living space look pretty

      Pick a special mug for your coffee or tea

      Take regular breaks for coffee or tea

      Try to make your plate of food look as pretty as possible (a great excuse to add colourful veg!)

      Pick a spot in nature to work out or work

      Reflect on each day More

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      How To Decentre Alcohol From Your Social Life

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      Whether you’re one of the many who identifies as sober curious, soberish or California sober – it’s hard to deny: More and more people are looking for ways to decrease the role that alcohol plays in their lives. Between hangovers, hangxiety and um, the fact that alcohol is a known carcinogen, there’s plenty of reasons to limit just how much you’re consuming. But it’s easier said than done when alcohol is the focal point that many people’s social lives are centred around. That’s why we consulted the experts to show you how to cut back on drinking alcohol without your social life taking a knock.“It’s hard to go anywhere without someone offering you a drink,” says licensed clinical professional counsellor Leah Young, a Clinical Manager at Pathlight Mood & Anxiety Centre. Even if you’re not someone who struggles with alcohol addiction, it can be hard to decrease your alcohol intake. This is because alcohol shows up *a lot* in our day-to-day. It’s at sports games, company events and for some people, a regular night out with friends. “Alcohol has really permeated both happy moments and celebrations and sad ones when people are grieving and everything in between, including even when people are bored,” says Hilary Sheinbaum, author of The Dry Challenge: How to Lose the Booze for Dry January, Sober October, and Any Other Alcohol-Free Month. “It’s become almost the main character in social situations.” (Think: post-work happy hour, first-date drinks, best friends’ birthday parties, cry sessions after a breakup.) Chances are, you’re never too far from the next opportunity to drink, which only makes it harder to cut back.READ MORE: 13 Simple Mocktail Recipes To Keep On Hand All Year LongWhat to expect when you cut back on drinkingThe truth is that alcohol – through marketing, media and thousands of years of traditions – has wormed its way into a prominent role in our lives, both consciously and subconsciously. Sometimes, it provides a reason to get together with friends and other times it helps make a social situation feel a little bit smoother. Trying to decentre it then comes with some logistical and personal challenges. Like, can you still go to the bar with your friends? And, how do you handle how other people might react to you not drinking?Because drinking is so normalised, deciding not to might come with questions. You can expect that some people will be curious, says Young. But, it might also come with seemingly some discomfort or disappointment from friends. Those moments can be thought of as a “them thing, and less of a you thing,” says licensed clinical social worker Shani Gardner, a therapist at Soulful Grace Therapy. Switching up your behaviour might make people question their own and result in them projecting onto you. Approach that with kindness and compassion – but don’t take it personally, she says.READ MORE: Seriously Now, Is Alcohol Really THAT Bad For Your Sleep?“It’s become almost the main character in social situations.”At the same time *you* might be the one projecting. “We fill in the gaps in our head with what we think other people are thinking or feeling about us,” says Dr Hayley Treloar Padovano, an associate professor of behavioural and social sciences at the Centre for Alcohol and Addiction Studies at Brown University. “A lot of times those things aren’t true.” You might be worried about your friends judging you for not drinking, but it’s a misconception that drinking less or not drinking at all necessarily needs to turn your entire social life upside down. “You’re still going to be as fun. You’re still going to be as engaged – if not more engaged – in the conversation,” says Sheinbaum. “It’s just that you are going to have something different in your hands.”Untangling alcohol from your social life might feel like a big task, but on the other side of it is better sleep, better digestion and financial savings, to name a few, says Sheinbaum, who is sober curious herself and only drinks about once a month. Luckily, these expert tips for people looking to drink less make it a lot simpler.Meet the experts: Hilary Sheinbaum is a journalist, the founder of GoingDry.co, and author of The Dry Challenge: How to Lose the Booze for Dry January, Sober October, and Any Other Alcohol-Free Month and Going Dry: A Workbook: A Practical Guide to Drinking Less and Living More. Leah Young is a licensed clinical professional counsellor and the Clinical Manager at Pathlight Mood & Anxiety Centre. Shani Gardner is a licensed clinical social worker and the founder and therapist at Soulful Grace Therapy. Dr Hayley Treloar Padovano is an Associate Professor of Psychiatry and Human Behaviour at Brown University’s Centre for Alcohol and Addiction Studies.6 Tips To Decentre Alcohol From Your Life & How To Cut Back On Drink Alcohol1. Practice turning down alcohol in advance.If you know you’re heading to an event where you’ll be offered alcohol, prepare what you’re going to say before you get there, says Young. You don’t owe anyone a lengthy explanation, but coming up with something short and sweet beforehand can help minimise attention to your lack of drinking and make you feel more confident about navigating the convo.“You can have one statement ready to go for everybody, or you can vary and tailor it depending on your relationship with the person,” says Young. “But it’s important to practice it, otherwise you might stand there looking like a fish gasping for air.”You can stick to something simple, like, “Thank you, but I have a huge day at work tomorrow, so I’m not planning on drinking tonight” or “Actually, what I’m really craving right now is a Diet Coke.” Or, give more insight by saying something along the lines of, “I’ve been experimenting with drinking less to see if it boosts my energy/improves my mental focus/clears my skin,” – or whatever your reason is for cutting down on alcohol. You might even find that others have the same goal. But how you say it matters. Confidence is key, says Young. So is making sure you’re firm if you need to be, adds Sheinbaum. READ MORE: How To Do Social Season Sober, Plus The 15 Best Alcohol-Free Drinks2. Delay your drinking by 30 minutes.Ordering a drink upon arrival to your destination might feel like an icebreaker or a way to ease yourself into a social situation, and it often happens out of habit. By setting a goal to wait 30 minutes before you order your first glass of rosé, you can learn to tolerate any discomfort – and discover that you don’t need the alcohol in the first place. “If you put yourself in that situation and you say, ‘Okay, for 30 minutes I’m not going to drink and I’m just going to see what happens,’ you’ll discover that what goes up must go down; Our anxiety just can’t keep going up forever,” says Treloar Padovano. It’s kind of like exposure therapy for not drinking for longer periods of time. You’ll get better at navigating spaces without an alcoholic beverage in hand and build up the muscle to deal with the anxiety you have about not drinking. When the 30 minutes is up, feel free to order an alcoholic drink if you want one – or maybe you end up opting to wait another 30 minutes, and then another 30 and so on.3. Take the lead when ordering a drink or making plans.Have you ever been out to dinner and the first person to order gets an espresso martini and then suddenly everyone else at the table orders an espresso martini? That’s because drinking can also be about sharing an experience, says Sheinbaum. The thing is, your shared experience doesn’t have to be with alcohol. Set the tone by ordering a creative mocktail, the house-made lemonade or a classic Shirley Temple. Your friends might just follow suit. (Pro tip: If you pick the restaurant, you can be sure that there are plenty of delicious-sounding non-alc options.)You can also take the lead in other ways by volunteering to host or inviting people to get togethers where alcohol isn’t centre-stage or even present at all, says Young. Game or craft nights, bowling, museum-exploring and pottery are all things that can be done sans-alcohol (though your friends might bring some anyway). What you can control is serving a killer mocktail for the evening and providing your friends with something fun to do that isn’t sipping on alcohol. “Anything that is using your hands or using your body is fun,” says Gardner. “How could you drink alcohol and be wheel throwing at the same time? It just would be a little bit challenging to do that.” When the main event isn’t just showing up to a bar, it takes some of the pressure off of drinking.At the end of the day, remember that drinking is just one of the many activities you can do with loved ones, says Gardner. Adding some variety can help not only decrease your weekly drink count, but also expose you to new hobbies.READ MORE: 3 Easy Summer Mocktails For Social Gatherings4. Make your intentions clear to trusted friends and voice what type of support you need from them.While you don’t need to discuss your drinking habits with everyone, bringing a few friends in on your intention is a good idea, says Treloar Padovano. “Find a believer,” she says, or someone who is supportive of you. You can be vulnerable and open up the conversation before you head out to your plans, says Gardner. Start by sharing your goal, and then what you’re hoping your friend can do to help. It doesn’t need to be a super-intense talk. You can casually and confidently mention that you’re trying to drink less – and why. One reason to talk it out? You might find that some of your friends feel the same way, and this can help you feel more confident and comfortable with your decision. Even better: If you’re concerned about other people harping on the decision while you’re out, having an ally can help by distracting or backing you up when the topic arises about what’s in your cup, says Young. “Or you can even find somebody who’s willing to not drink with you that night,” she says. Whatever you need, just make sure to communicate it with your friends.Having a conversation in advance can also help set expectations on your friends’ part. This way, by the time you get to your destination for the evening, they know you won’t be drinking and have managed their own ideas for how the night will go. It also might help navigate any weirdness or surprises later on. For example, when it comes to the ever-popular suggestion of first-date drinks, mention that you probably won’t be drinking – but that they should free to – before making set plans.READ MORE: Here’s How To Spot Secret Addictions And Tips To Break The Cycle5. Find something else to calm your nerves.If you feel like alcohol helps you in a social setting, whether it’s by making you more calm or confident, just know that there are other, potentially healthier options for getting that effect, says Gardner.Instead of pregaming your date with a White Claw, turn on your favourite pump-up playlist to boost your confidence or try a quickie yoga meditation to quiet your nerves. If you show up to a social event and suddenly feel a little overwhelmed and nervous, head over to the bathroom for a deep-breathing break. This also might be a good time to call on the friend you’ve told about your decreased-drinking goals. They could make the ultimate hype person.You’ll have to find what works for you, but it starts with identifying what you’re perceiving alcohol to help you with and finding something else that does the same, says Gardner. 6. Try a dry challenge.While going cold-turkey from alcohol might not work for everyone, for some, a short dry challenge might be a helpful way to disrupt your drinking habits and have a long-term impact. “In some ways, not drinking at all is easier because you take the decision-making out of it,” says Treloar Padovano. Having a hard line to draw might simplify drinking less, rather than having to decide each time how much (or how little) you plan on drinking.For Sheinbaum, doing a dry challenge started out as a competition with her friend, but it turned into something much more. “I’m a stubborn Aries, so I was very dedicated to this challenge,” she says. And, while Sheinbaum was technically the winner because she didn’t drink for the entire month while her friend had one cocktail (and was treated to [a pricy] dinner as a result), both she and her friend saw benefits. “I say that we both ended up winning because it changed my perspective entirely about how alcohol is affecting my brain, my body, my mood, my life and my career,” she says.READ MORE: 5 Ways To Protect Your Liver From “Summer Season” DamageTake on the challenge with a friendJoining in on challenges like Dry January and Sober October – two months during which people abstain from alcohol – are also a built-in explanation for not drinking and likely mean you won’t be making the decision alone, too. Doing a dry challenge with a friend gives you a built-in support to vent to and cheer you on. Another perk: When you set a time goal to abstain from alcohol, every day you can track your progress, Sheinbaum says. Each day you get closer to your goal simply by skipping a post-work glass of wine. Plus, the effects are noticeable fast, she says. “Within the first ten days I noticed better sleep and my skin definitely improved,” she says.This article is intended for those looking to change their relationship with alcohol socially. If you are someone who deals with addiction, find emergency hotlines, counselling and treatment options here.This article by Olivia Luppino was originally published on Women’s Health US. More

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      Why Practicing Self-Efficacy Is Key To Becoming The Best Version Of Yourself

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      There’s a reason the words “believe in yourself” are plastered on classroom signs and cross-stitched on throw pillows. Your sense of self-efficacy, or the belief that you can accomplish what you set out to do – whether that’s finishing a 5K or a master’s degree – plays a huge role in whether or not you succeed, according to experts and research.While this may seem quite obvious, developing (and, later, maintaining) an I-can-do attitude is easier said than done. A person’s sense of self-efficacy is built up over time as they experience life and, inevitably, failure, says Jessica B. Stern, PhD, a licensed clinical psychologist, clinical assistant professor in the Department of Psychiatry at NYU Langone Health, and host of SiriusXM’s Doctor Radio. How people respond to messing up a presentation at work or getting their heart broken shapes future success. “Are you able to work through frustration? How you interpret that or extrapolate from that frustration is meaningful,” says Stern. If you always tell yourself that you will fail or that one misstep means you might as well quit altogether, you are less likely to succeed. Unfortunately, improving that self-talk can be a bit more challenging than ordering an inspirational pillow on Etsy.The good news? There are everyday strategies you can do to strengthen this mental muscle. Just like you’d need to build up your cardiovascular endurance before crushing that 5K, you need to work your self-efficacy in small ways to see lasting results, says Brian Licuanan, PhD, a California-based clinical psychologist and author of How to Get Your Resisting Loved One Into Treatment. Science backs this up, too: A 2020 study of medical students showed building up self-efficacy improved academic results. And self-efficacy was the strongest predictor for student success, according to a 2012 study.How To Assess Your Self-Efficacy LevelThe way you speak to yourself, especially in the face of obstacles, is an easy way to gauge your own sense of self-efficacy, says Thea Gallagher, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and associate professor at NYU Langone Health. A person with low self-efficacy will discount their achievements and blame themselves if they believe they made an error. “[They] might say, ‘Yeah, I did that thing, but other people could do it better,’ or ‘I didn’t do a great job,’ or ‘It wasn’t that hard,’” Gallagher says. “They add disclaimers to accomplishments and double down on the negative self-talk.”On the other end of the spectrum, a person with high self-efficacy has grace for their mistakes and speaks kindly to themselves, like they might talk to a friend. In the face of failure, they tend to recognise their error and start fresh with a new plan. It’s about the bounce back, not the setback.FYI: This doesn’t mean someone with high self-efficacy thinks they are perfect, says Gallagher. “It’s about keeping track of the thing you do that you’re proud of, or that might be a little bit hard for you.” And those who have high self-efficacy still need to work toward their goals, adds Licuanan. If you want to participate in Dry January, for example, you shouldn’t celebrate New Year’s Eve with a bottle of tequila and expect to wake up the next morning a new person. For your belief in yourself to work and, ultimately, help you achieve your goals, you need to start by breaking those goals down into small, realistic steps, he says.Self-Efficacy Vs. Self-Esteem: Many people either haven’t heard of self-efficacy or conflate it with self-esteem or self-confidence, says Licuanan. “[But] Self-esteem, or confidence, is just a general feeling of one’s worth and meaningfulness.” Self-esteem tends to be based on overall emotion toward oneself, whereas self-efficacy is tied to motivation, achievement and success. Learning to use your self-esteem and/or general sense of meaning in the world, can also strengthen that self-efficacy muscle, too. For example, think about your place in your world as you go about your daily tasks. This will help you recognise that others rely on you and you make a meaningful impact, says Licuanan, and keeping that top of mind is motivating.Ahead, the experts share six ways to build up your sense of self-efficacy every day:1. Start a to-do list of all of your tasks and cross them off as you finishWhile you may take it for granted that when your alarm goes off each morning, you work out, hop in the shower and make breakfast – all before heading to work for the day – taking a moment to acknowledge and celebrate your “micro successes” can help beginners build up their self-efficacy, says Licuanan. “From fixing your bed to being able to eat meals and go to the gym, we take those as routine activities, but those are highly successful activities.”Start taking stock of your micro successes by writing a to-do list for everything you do in a day and cross the tasks off as you finish them. Once you watch all those little wins pile up, you’ll be more willing to venture outside of your comfort zone and tackle bigger life goals, he says.2. Repeat positive affirmations to yourselfAs mentioned, self-talk plays a big role in building up a strong sense of self-efficacy. If your inner monologue is a bit negative, it can be understandably difficult to believe in your own success. This is where positive affirmations come in, the experts say. Something as simple as repeating ‘I will be more positive, I am patient, I am successful’ to yourself can have a profound impact on your mental state, says Licuanan. And while it may seem silly to repeat something, especially a phrase you may not believe in, what you are actually doing is subconsciously rewiring your brain by creating new neurological pathways. Over time, your brain will begin to truly believe what you’re telling yourself. It happens slowly, says Stern, but it is powerful.3. JournalWriting about your day, what is going on and how you feel about it all can be helpful here, says Stern. You can start by observing how you speak about yourself in your writing or begin to catalogue your wins throughout the day – from catching the early bus to having a great night out with your bestie. Taking the time to slow down and appreciate the positive moments already happening in your life can help build up your self-efficacy.READ MORE: 15 Best Journalling Apps To Start The New Year With More Mindfulness4. Look at the evidenceIf you tend to think in extremes (meaning, you’re either the worst or the best at everything with no room for nuance), pausing and questioning yourself can help you switch your self-talk, says Gallagher. Say you have a goal of drinking more water each day. Instead of questioning why you can’t get it together, look at the evidence. Are you making it easy to stay hydrated by bringing a water bottle with you? Are you speaking to yourself kindly, even when you realise at 6 p.m. you haven’t sipped anything other than cold brew?These are all steps in a positive direction and, although they may seem small, they matter. Looking at this evidence and giving yourself a pat on the back for trying is important, Gallagher says. Examining the facts versus what you’re telling yourself can illuminate differences in your narrative vs reality, helping you to get back and/or stay on track.5. Listen to positive messages like motivational talks and podcastsListening to stories from people who have overcome hardship to achieve their goals can also help expand your perspective. Seeing that other people, just like yourself, have survived their own struggles and emerged stronger can fortify your belief in your own success. Watching Ted Talks or motivational speeches on YouTube or incorporating an inspirational podcast into your daily routine is an easy way to build up your sense of self-efficacy, says Licuanan.READ MORE: These 3 Mental Exercises Can Help You Find Your Purpose In Life At Any Age6. Write down a list of your strengthsAn easy way to shut your inner sh*t talker up is to have a list of things you love about yourself in your back pocket. Take a few moments to write down your personal strengths, says Stern, whether on a piece of paper or in the Notes app of your phone. Maybe you are a good friend or a hard worker. When your inner monologue tells you otherwise, refer back to this list. Bonus points if you keep it on your phone, wallet, or somewhere else easily accessible.While believing in yourself isn’t always easy, developing and maintaining a strong sense of self-efficacy can help you achieve more and live a fuller life. So, next time you see a cheesy sign or cross-stitched pillow with the words “believe in yourself,” take a moment and let that sink in. After all, if you don’t believe in yourself, who will?This article by Jacqueline Tempera was originally published on Women’s Health US. More

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      Year-End Burnout? How To Cope, From A Doc

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      Year-end burnout can feel like a slow, painful crawl to mid-December when you’re finally allowed to cancel the alarm and enable that OOO. Right now, there are urgent memos everywhere, last-minute to-dos and all the things you said you’d finish by July, now threatening to swallow you whole.And since you’ve been working so hard, you’re likely feeling drained, fog-headed and beset with mystery colds. To stave off a complete meltdown, these tips from general practitioner Dr Unben Pillay will help. He’s a medical expert at Unu Health (a comprehensive telemedicine app) and has a special interest in chronic disease management. These tips will help manage your exhaustion and set up a way to prevent burnout in the future.Signs you have year-end burnoutThe signs of burnout, whether it’s at the end of the year, mid-way through or any other time, remain the same.Frequent or persistent colds

      Chronic stress

      Exhaustion

      Changes in appetite and sleeping patterns

      Stomach aches

      Trouble concentrating

      Frequent procrastination  READ MORE: People Pleasing Can Have Some Harmful Mental Health Effects — Experts Say This Is How To StopStart right nowYear-end burnout can become bad enough that it threatens your summer vacay. As soon as you realise your motivation is flagging, do something about it. “Exhaustion from the constant demands of life often accumulates over the course of the year, leading to a high risk of burnout in Q4,” says Dr Pillay. “If health concerns are ignored now, they can escalate into more serious issues, making it difficult to fully enjoy the holidays.” How that works? Following the steps below and seeking professional help if you need it.Take short, frequent breaksA meta-analysis in PLOS ONE found that micro-breaks worked for well-being and reducing fatigue. Some breaks were mere seconds, while others were a few minutes. The study also found that for more cognitive-heavy tasks, breaks of more than 10 minutes were likely needed.Your move: set a timer for 30 minutes and walk around or look at something other than your screen for just five minutes. Repeat the schedule for the day. Your break could be shorter; there’s no consensus on break duration. But take one!READ MORE: Yes, Happiness Can Boost Productivity – Here’s HowPrioritise sleepNot a new one – but something to *actually* implement. Multiple studies have linked low-quality sleep to everything from poor mental health to impaired brain function and even an increased risk of obesity, hypertension and stroke. As to your year-end burnout, a new study in Frontiers Public Health found that people who get less than seven hours of sleep were more likely to have burnout compared to those with more sleep.Your move: Get in the zone for sleep: light candles, have a bath or shower, journal or meditate, and allow yourself to drift off peacefully. Use these hacks to fall asleep faster.  Move moreIf your workouts have taken a back seat to your burgeoning to-do list, it’s time to add it back in – at the top. Doing it first thing eliminates it fast and boosts your mood and productivity for the day. And your workout doesn’t have to be HIIT. “Regular exercise helps combat fatigue and boosts energy levels, even if it’s just a short walk,” says Dr Pillay.READ MORE: 6 Energy-Boosting Hacks That Are Simple To IntegrateFocus on nutritionLook to foods that will energise you, and not drain you. A burger and fries will fill you up but the processed carbs won’t support your well-being. Try air-fried cauliflower and broccoli with a hummus dip – satisfying but packed with nutrients. Try these tips to add more veg to your diet without trying.Get professional help (early)“Don’t wait for your symptoms to become severe,” warns Dr Pillay. “Access medical advice sooner rather than later to prevent more serious issues.” A medical check-up can also reveal key deficiencies that lead to feelings of exhaustion, like low iron or vitamin D levels.   More

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      Queen Modjadji’s Breakout Star Masutang Rasekele On Life, Wellness And Finally Living Her Dream

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      There’s been a lot of curiosity around new kid on the block Masutang Hope Rasekele, who recently made her acting debut on Queen Modjadji, a new Mzansi Magic series that has had South Africans talking since its premiere on Sunday, 14 July. Delivered purely in Khelovedu, an indigenous South African language, the show is a celebration of the life and times of the legendary rainmaking Queen Modjadji of the Balobedu nation, whose story hasn’t been documented enough to date.

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      On the show, Masutang plays Dzugudini, a role she admits she got purely by being ‘at the right place at the right time’. Initially hired as a language and cultural advisor on Queen Modjadji, Masutang was recommended by a fellow crew member when the show’s ‘powers that be’ were specifically looking for an actress fluent in Khelovedu to play the fierce and controversial Princess Dzugudini. Below, the 26-year-old breakout star lets us in on her wellness practices.

      READ MORE: Food, Fitness & Family: How Zinhle Masango Juggles It All

      Best way to start your mornings…

      “I love ushering in my mornings with absolute silence. No phone, nothing – just meditating and gathering my thoughts from the previous day and deciding how I want to proceed with the new day, the kind of energy that I want to pour into the day and lots of positive affirmations. This practice of gathering my mind, body and soul in one space usually gets me into a good mental space, especially on days when I have lots of tasks ahead of me. All of this is usually sealed with a cup of tea at the end.”

      My name means…

      “Masutang (or Mmasutdani as I prefer to spell it), means ‘make way for me’. I was born on 24 May 1998, the same day on which my great grandmother passed on. My family believed that she made way for me to arrive safely in this lifetime. So, there is the Home Affairs spelling of my name, which is Masutang. ‘Mmasutdani’ is just me trying to reclaim the real spelling of my name, especially because Khelovedu is not an official language in South Africa. The latter spelling captures the true sound of my name.”

      Wellness routine that works best for your lifestyle 

      “I usually don’t have time to go to the gym. I stay active by dancing, stretching and walking wherever possible to get those steps in. I also meditate a lot and love spending time in absolute silence – it’s literally the only time I get to evaluate the state of my mental health. I also journal a lot, I find that it elevates my mood.”

      Lessons from the last book I read 

      “It’s a book called Zwireto by Makhwekhwe Volume 1, written by an old Bolobedu-based lady called Makhwekhwe. She documents the different idioms and proverbs used in Khelovedu. This is the best purchase I’ve ever made because we seldom have material that is aimed at preserving languages and cultures. Language is a huge part of anyone’s identity. Having a book written in Khelovedu and aimed at preserving my language is the best thing that I’ve come across – and I absolutely love it.”

      READ MORE: This Cape Malay Stuffed Linefish Is Simple And Delicious

      My favourite go-to breakfast

      Molatša (leftover pap) with hot eggs. The eggs must be extremely well done, please! [chuckles]

      How I nourish my body

      “I could definitely do better in this area of my life. I love to prep for salads and could have them any time of the day. I follow someone who does what’s called ‘salad chemistry’ which has inspired me to incorporate a lot of fresh foods in my own creations. I also drink a lot of sparkling water — I don’t know if sparkling water is healthy enough though?! [chuckles]. I also believe that nourishing the body alone isn’t enough. So, I also make an effort to be gentle with, and speak positively to, myself. I’m also very particular with what I surround myself with.”

      Best wellness advice I have received

      “It’s the very common phrase: ‘Your health is your wealth’. I can’t think of any truer statement. If you take care of yourself, you will definitely reap the rewards in the end. This includes listening to my body when it’s had enough, that way I’m able to replenish my energy levels and continue with whatever work needs to be done. My work requires good physical and mental health. So, it’s only through taking good care of myself that I’m able to deliver.”

      READ MORE: Advice For Your 20s And 30s: What They Don’t Tell You About Ageing

      The last song that made me cry

      “Bonus by J John The Big Baby & Huzz Beats. Loosely translated, this Tsonga song says ‘we’re not sleeping today because we’ve received a bonus in the form of blessings.’ The song may not make sense or be relevant to some but, for me, it signifies the day my life changed when I bagged my current role on Queen Modjadji. I play this song daily to remind myself how blessed I am. Anyone more qualified could’ve gotten this role, instead I was chosen. The song, in the context of my life story, brings me to tears because I’m finally walking in the direction of the life that I’ve always dreamt of. “

      Best way to end my day

      “I love wrapping up my days by watching something light and funny on TV and debriefing via journalling. The latter allows me to take stock of my emotions and how I responded to certain things throughout the day. I love to laugh and don’t enjoy going to sleep with a heavy heart – so comedy and some self-awareness do the trick for me.” More

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      Actress Temi Otedola On Why She Prefers A Simple Wellness Routine

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      At first glance, Temi Otedola (the newly announced L’oreal Paris Digital Brand Ambassador for sub-Saharan Africa) gives off the vibe of someone who doesn’t skimp on self-care. Always styled elegantly for a 28-year-old, and a fan of a clean make-up look that still allows her skin to breathe, it’s no wonder the Nigeria-based actress is one of Africa’s most loved personalities.

      Naturally, Temi is honoured to be L’Oreal Paris‘ first digital brand ambassador, a role that will see her face plastered on the brand’s digital, and some in-store campaigns, across Africa.

      “My job is to spread the L’Oreal Paris message across Africa digitally, as that is the new frontier,” she beams. She adds: “I hope to be the first of many incredible African women in this role, and not just from Nigeria. L’Oreal Paris is a brand with a very rich legacy, but it’s still new to our space. Not new in terms of products, but awareness. I look forward to sharing about the science-based research that they do on their products and melanated skin, specifically,” shares Temi, who also adds that she can’t wait to remind women that ‘they are worth it’, per the powerful L’Oreal Paris slogan.

      In addition, through this role, Temi hopes to leave behind a legacy of having reminded young women that there is no universal beauty standard – and that comfort with, and confidence in, self trump everything else. Below, Temi shares some of the wellness practices that help her step out into the world fully radiant (and with an assured bounce in her step).

      READ MORE: How To Tailor Your Skincare For Hormones, Per Experts

      Skincare routine that I swear by

      “To be honest, I’m very simple with my skincare. So long as my skin is hydrated and I’m wearing sunscreen, that’s really where it stops and ends. Where skin is concerned, I do think that less is more. I love using  hyaluronic acid  but I think the more things we use on our skin, the more irritated it becomes.”

      “I love a facial once a month. Like I said, hydration is my top priority. But, I also always say that it doesn’t matter how many skincare products you use, if you don’t drink water or sleep enough, it’s all pointless really! I know it’s clichéd, but self-care is more important a lot of the time. I’m on a plane every few days so if I don’t back it up with sleep, my skincare routine will be pointless.”  

      Sleep catch-ups

      “If you give me the time, I could sleep up to 14 hours – I am that person [chuckles]! Unfortunately, I’m not able to do that. I can’t nap, although I wish I was able to. Let’s say I have the odd one day off and I know the next three weeks are going to be crazy, I will happily sleep for 14 hours [chuckles]. This relationship with sleep runs in my family. My 92-year-old grandmother wakes up at 5am daily, goes to her farm and she’s in bed by 8pm. I hope to be like that at her age!”

      Favourite way to stay fit 

      “Yoga is my favourite thing ever! During the pandemic when we couldn’t go to the gym, I got into yoga classes on YouTube. I love YouTube because you can get anything you need – and it’s free. I enjoy walking as well, it’s the best way to experience a new city, especially when I’m travelling.”

      READ MORE: How To Change Up Your Skin Routine For More Hydrated Skin This Winter

      Favourite way to nourish my body

      “So, I have this amazing smoothie that I love to make in the morning. It has flax seeds, chia seeds, frozen berries, spirulina powder, almond butter and a few other good things. I just throw everything in because I can just sip on it while I’m on the move all morning. I also love taking green juice, as well as fresh ginger and lemon. With all the travelling that I do, if I don’t do this daily, I will fall ill at some point. I think it’s so important to give yourself these little boosts throughout the day, be it a ginger or turmeric shot, because they help boost your immune system.

      I was vegetarian for six years and that’s very rare in Nigeria [chuckles]. I was one of five out of a population of two hundred million. I found myself hopping on and off the vegetarian diet. Having seafood now and again is also good for my iron. I think it’s important to always listen to our bodies at all times.”

      My best way to stay focused

      “Let’s say I’m on a movie set, and call time is 4am and I know that I’m going to be there until midnight, it’s actually best to put my phone away and be as present as possible. The issue with our phones is that we can be in twenty different places at once – almost like you’re teleporting yourself. You could see one message or email that could change your entire mood for the day. I only touch my phone when I feel grounded in my day. When we were shooting with L’Oreal Paris, for instance, I tried to take in as much of the present moments as possible. Our phones are a great communication tool, but they can also be very addictive and disruptive.”

      READ MORE: Everything To Know About Double Cleansing – And Which Products To Use

      Best way to de-stress

      “I love all things aromatherapy, something I inherited from my mother. I always have incense or candles burning in my room. Amazon has these eucalyptus shower steamers which I love using after a long day. They help take weight off me.”

      Best way to hone confidence

      “Confidence and beauty are what’s underneath the skin, they’re not surface level. In the past, I’ve been very honest about my insecurities and my own journey with beauty – and how in the end, I actually decided that I didn’t want to be like everyone else. I’m only trying to be the best version of Temi. You want to try be the best version of yourself at any given time, it’s never about aspiring to be like anyone else.

      Social media has made made people feel like their lives are not enough. When in fact, we should be inspiring and encouraging each other, and constantly reminding ourselves that who we are is enough.” More