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      in beauty and fashion

      Every Coat We Need to Discuss From “Emily in Paris”

      by

      OK, confession time: The plot of Emily in Paris wasn’t exactly my thing. I scoffed every time yet another perfect French man strolled into Emily’s life and rolled my eyes at her rapid Instagram growth with little effort. So what made me finish all 10 episodes in a mere weekend? Her clothes.Emily’s wardrobe is, in a word, perfection. It’s eclectic and fun and colorful and everything unexpected that we actually wanted this year. And my personal favorite part of all of it? Her coats and jackets. There is absolutely nothing that can steal the show like a fabulous jacket can, and Emily proved that in just about every scene in the show. I didn’t know I needed a metallic green jacket, but hell, I guess she showed me that I do now.
      Sit back, enjoy the show, and leave the frantic Googling to us—these are the closest dupes on the Internet to Emily Cooper’s swoon-worthy coat collection (all at price’s that are a lot less than her Chanel habits). 

      1.

      Of course Emily was on the shacket trend before anyone else. This red, plaid one is perfect to cozy up in for the holiday season.

      2.

      A classic blush coat is something you’ll never regret having. For extra Emily points, pair it with something bright underneath.

      3.

      Never did I think I’d want something turquoise in my wardrobe in 2020 (the same exact color as my senior year homecoming dress), but leave it to Emily to show us how fun and different it can be.

      4.

      One of Emily’s more classic looks, this plaid blazer pairs well with just about everything—and the beret to top it off is icing on the cake.

      5.

      This coat was, arguably, my favorite of the entire season and made me want to toss my black coats out the window immediately. If you ever needed inspiration to have fun with your outerwear, this is it.

      6.

      Mindy’s chic python blazer dress steals the show here, but we also can’t deny how fabulous this metallic, emerald look is either (again, who would’ve thought?). You can’t go wrong with either of these for a go-to for a statement look.

      7.

      Can you imagine walking into a Christmas party in this? Enough said.

      8.

      When Emily walked on-screen in this coat, I stopped what I was doing and searched “green coat” on every site I could think of. While this Chanel one is a liiiiiittle out of budget, you can get a similar look with these:

      9.

      This slouchy, black denim number captures that effortless Parisian vibe with little-to-no effort.

      10.

      A leather blazer was already on our 2020 wish list, and this solidified it near the top of the spot. Mindy also looks incredible in this out-of-the-box number, proving how fabulous bright patterns can be.

      11.

      Of all the blazers I’ve seen frequently, a classic red one isn’t on that last, and after seeing this one, I can’t figure out why that is. Wear it for the holiday season and beyond by pairing it with all your neutral pieces (or if you want to channel Emily even more, with something bright).

      12.

      While the leather beret is an obvious talking point here, this mid-toned green jacket checks a box that few other things can: it somehow is both classic and fun.

      13.

      A red, plaid blazer is the investment piece that will have you patting yourself on the back again and again. Pair it with one of this season’s out-of-the-box collared tops to capture this look seamlessly.

      14.

      When you’re covering your entire outfit with a coat, the coat might as well do all the talking; and what talks more than this bad boy?

      15.

      This classic coat would look just as amazing with black or white underneath, but Emily shows how versatile it is with these fun, bubblegum pink pieces.  More

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      in health and weelbeing

      Why I Talk About Feminism on First Dates

      by

      “I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to meet someone,” I said to my friends one day. But one of my friends quickly told me exactly why: it was because I expected too much from men. I even expected them to be feminists.I was immediately disheartened when I heard that she thought this was a lot to ask. I don’t expect the men I date to wear “women’s rights are human rights” T-shirts or have a PhD in gender studies. I don’t even expect them to identify as feminists, because it’s just a label and doesn’t carry much weight—I’ve met sexist men who call themselves “feminists.” But I do expect them to believe in gender equality, and I don’t think that’s too much to ask.
      Still, her comment got to me, and for a period of time, I was less outspoken about my beliefs, at least on first dates. It didn’t take me long to realize that holding these views back didn’t make dating any easier for me—in fact, it made it even more difficult. There are several reasons why I continue to talk about feminism on first dates.

      1. Gender equality should not be a radical idea. 
      I get that talking about politics, religion, or social justice issues on a first date could be perceived as intense. At the same time, gender equality should not be a radical idea. If I’m out with someone who is offended or discomforted by the idea that all genders are equal, that’s a red flag. 

      2. I don’t want to be several months in and find out that he harbors sexist views. 
      Speaking of red flags, I’d rather identify them early on than be several months into a relationship only to find out that my partner and I have opposing fundamental beliefs. Gender equality is not something minor to me. There are some things that I’m willing to agree to disagree about, and this is not one of them. The kinds of beliefs someone has about gender tells me a lot about their expectations for our relationship. During the time that I was avoiding talking about feminism on first dates, I still talked about politics and assumed that a guy I went out with was compatible with me because he was anti-racist and fairly left-wing. I only later found out that in addition to being mostly liberal, he’s also anti-abortion and is a strong proponent of traditional gender roles. Because I had already spent a bit of time getting to know him and I liked other things about him, I tried to make it work, but we argued on a regular basis, and I would never be the “good wife” he was truly looking for (and I didn’t want to be). If I’m dating a sexist man, I will find out eventually. Why wait until I’m already in deep? 

      3. I’m not scared of scaring someone away.
      We’ve heard it time and time again: don’t talk about religion or politics on the first date. But from my perspective, everything is political in some way. To avoid all political discussions is to have a pretty shallow conversation. I’m not dating to talk about the weather. I’m dating to truly get to know someone. During the time that I stopped talking about gender issues on first dates, I felt as if I was hiding part of myself. It’s not that my first dates are a two-hour long gender studies lecture; usually, gender issues come up organically because they’re connected to something else we’re talking about. If not, it’s natural for me to mention gender issues when someone asks about my passions or interests. Talking about feminist issues might scare some people away, but if I scare sexist guys away, I’m doing exactly what I want to do: filtering out people I’m not compatible with. 

      4. I want him to like me for who I am.
      When I had my first childhood crush, I actively tried to be the kind of girl I thought he would like. I was a proper chameleon, buying a jacket with his favorite football team’s logo on it, and adapting myself according to his interests. But I’ve lived and learned, and I’m not dating to stroke someone’s ego or to change myself until they finally accept me. I want to date someone who I truly like, and I want to date someone who truly likes me—not the idea of me or an altered, watered-down version of me. I once went out with a man who stopped me mid-sentence when I started talking about gender issues. “I don’t want to hear about this,” he said. “I want to hear about you.” Maybe he thought he was being romantic in a way, but he didn’t realize that they’re one in the same. I’m passionate about gender issues, and it’s part of who I am, not a separate entity. If a man doesn’t believe in gender equality, he’s not going to like me for who I am. It’s that simple. I now realize that the kind of man I want to date is one who is willing to engage in these conversations. 

      5. I can learn more about who this person truly is. 
      I don’t expect anyone to be perfect. I don’t expect a person I’m dating to know everything about gender issues (I don’t either, of course), or to fully understand something that he hasn’t experienced firsthand. But I do expect him to be open to listening. I do expect him to not be defensive. Talking about issues like this shows me how he reacts when faced with something uncomfortable or challenging. Is he just defensive when I’m simply having a discussion and not trying to argue, or does he want to know more? I once went out with a guy who said he didn’t believe some survivors of sexual assault because they reported it years after it happened. Extreme red flags aside, I tried to talk to him about why women might wait to come forward about sexual assault. As I was talking, he got up to add more sugar to his coffee and asked to change the subject once he returned. That told me exactly how he liked his version of reality: sugar-coated and easy to swallow. 

      6. I don’t want to tolerate sexist behavior anymore. 
      Gone are the days in which I would ignore casual and benevolent sexism because it “could be worse.” I’m willing to give second chances. People can change, especially if they didn’t recognize that the way they were thinking was sexist. But if he just doesn’t really care about sexism, thinks it’s not a big deal or says something along the lines of, “Well, that’s just the way things are,” I’m not here for that. Benevolent sexism is still sexism, and I don’t want it in my relationships. I want an equal partnership. Unfortunately, maybe that’s a lot to ask from a heterosexual relationship at this point in time. But I’m going to keep asking.  More

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      in health and weelbeing

      How I’m Learning to Live a More Authentic Life

      by

      I love a romantic comedy. The predictability of the storyline and the inevitable happy ending sucks me in every time. I watch them on rainy days, I watch them on days when I have cramps, and I watch them on days when I’m feeling down. I’ve seen hundreds of romantic comedies, yet I’ve never seen one that is a true reflection of my authentic life. There’s no romantic story that features a Black bohemian femme who goes to college three times to figure out that the career she’s best suited for doesn’t actually need a degree at all. They have not written my story because my life doesn’t fit the typical mold. I’m a 37-year-old world-traveling free-spirit, living my most authentic life. My life wasn’t always this way, but today I can say that I love my life and I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

      There’s no romantic story that features a Black bohemian femme who goes to college three times to figure out that the career she’s best suited for doesn’t actually need a degree at all.

      From a young age, I realized that I wasn’t your typical child. My interests were different from my friends, the way I wanted to dress was different from my sisters, and my Christmas lists for Santa were filled with non-traditional items. I remember one year I asked for a hot stone massager and essential oils—and this was the ‘90s, so the term “self-care” as we know it now wasn’t even invented yet.
      I struggled through high school because everyone was so excited to go to college. My friends wanted to be nurses and teachers and seemed like they had it all figured out at the age of 18. I didn’t want to go to college. I asked my mom if I could rent a van and travel the country (#vanlife) when I graduated instead of going to college, and she turned me down faster than the speed of light. 
      I was frustrated because I wasn’t given options to explore what I wanted and what was important to me. It didn’t’ feel like college was the right next step, and I wanted time to explore what felt right for my journey. I grew up in a small town, and the lifestyle that was available to me in my hometown was not the lifestyle that I wanted for myself. I had no idea how to mentally and physically get out, yet I was screaming on the inside for somebody to let me go. I was craving freedom and wanted permission to explore all the options that were available to me.
      Instead, I was pushed into following the same steps that everyone else was following, but those choices never made sense to me. I went to college and followed the rules, and if I look back on it now, college was a giant waste of time. Yes, I had fun, but that fun cost me $30,000 in student loans. 

      I was pushed into following the same steps that everyone else was following, but those choices never made sense to me.

      After I graduated from college, I was still trying to figure out how to lead a “normal” life. I got a 9-5 job, a one-bedroom apartment, and moved to Philadelphia to try my hand at adulting. I remember going shopping to get professional clothes (of which I had none). Everyone was so excited as I came out of the dressing room in different versions of dress pants, blouses, and black flats. I’ve never felt like crawling out of my skin more than I did on that day. 
      I believe that moving to Philadelphia (even though corporate life wasn’t for me) was the turning point in my life. Living in a big city on my own gave me the adult playground I craved for in highschool. In Philly,  I was able to encounter different cultures, lifestyles, foods, and careers that I wouldn’t have had access to in my hometown. I remember the first time I tasted Indian food. Wow! I fell instantly in love. The flavors and spices that I experienced that night were completely new to me. I was never exposed to Indian food growing and my mind was blown. If a simple dining experience could open up my mind in this way, I was excited to see what other new experiences were ahead of me. 
      It felt as if I was getting a second education, and this knowledge proved to be more beneficial to me than my geometry class ever was. Because I was able to interact with so many different people I felt confident to show who I truly was. Seeing different lifestyles exist and thrive allowed me to take that first steps to uncover my truth. I went from an unfulfilled, suit-wearing, meat-eating 22-year-old to a happy, thriving, afro-wearing, free-spirit 37-year-old! That transition didn’t happen overnight.  I knew what it felt like to live someone else’s life and I wasn’t willing to do it anymore, so I slowly began making changes that honored who I was. I wanted to celebrate what I loved about myself and stop hiding who I was from the rest of the world. It was time for me to step out as my full self, and I was ready to take that journey. 

      Seeing different lifestyles exist and thrive allowed me to take that first steps to uncover my truth.

      I spent 20+ years being someone I thought I was “supposed to be.” It wasn’t until I started paying attention and honoring who I truly was and what I needed that I began to lead my most authentic life.

      If you want to start living your life on your own terms, ask yourself these three questions:

      What do I love about myself?
      This was not a question that was posed to me growing up, so it wasn’t something I focused on until I was in my 20s. When you ask, “What do I love about myself?” you begin to unlock clues and truths that are meant to be seen. I discovered that I loved my creativity and that creativity was meant to be celebrated. As a child, I was always creating. I sang, danced, cooked, and came up with “science experiments” out of thin air. My thoughts bounce around and don’t necessarily follow a linear pattern. I think my creative mind frustrated the adults in my life, so I was never pushed to use it. Realizing that my creative mind pushed me to brainstorm and innovate allowed me to strengthen this muscle and has become one of my most valuable assets.
      Answer honestly. Let whatever answers come up to be the start of something new. Once you have your list, see if you can use that information to make some small changes. Did you realize that you love your funky fashion sense? Head out to the thrift stores and buy a few favorite items. Not everything on your list will change your life dramatically, but starting small can begin to build the confidence to continue living life on your own terms. Remember, the things you love about yourself may just be your most valuable asset too!

      What and how am I hiding?
      It was easier for me to hide in corporate work clothes than walk into a room rocking a tie-dyed kaftan with a full afro. Hiding who I was and what was important to me was a coping mechanism I created. In the ‘90s where I grew up, the kaftan version of me would have been too much for people to handle. It felt safer to hide that piece of me from the rest of the world instead of walking in my full truth. In hindsight, if I would have continued to stay hidden, I would have never allowed my creativity to help me build the successful business that I have today. That business has allowed me to help so many people, and I never would have gotten there if I continued to hide who I was. 

      It was easier for me to hide in corporate work clothes than walk into a room rocking a tie-dyed kaftan with a full afro.

      Are you hiding? Why? When you hide, who you are you limit yourself from experiencing your full life? You were created in your unique way, and the world needs to see you fully. Stop hiding and walk in your truth one step at a time. 
      In 2005, I decided that I wanted to do the big chop and begin to wear my hair completely natural. I gathered all of my courage and headed to the only Black salon in Philadelphia doing natural hair at the time and cut my shoulder-length hair down to one inch. When I walked out of that salon, it was undeniable that I looked fly. From that point on, I could no longer hide. 
      Discovering how and why you are hiding could require you to make some uncomfortable decisions. There is a reason why you have been hiding, and walking out as your full self may take some time. Be patient with yourself and take it slowly. Ask yourself, “Where do I feel safe as the real me?” Maybe spend some time there and see how it feels. It may just be five minutes, and that’s OK. Know that every day won’t feel like a party, but the work you are doing is important and necessary. 

      Where can I begin to walk in my truth?
      Living an authentic life takes time. It’s unlikely that you will be able to go from 0-100 in 24 hours (although if you do, I will be your biggest cheerleader), so find a place to start. The first unveiling of my truth came when I went cold turkey and became a vegetarian. I was no longer at home having to eat whatever was cooked for dinner. I could make my own choices, and vegetarianism made sense for me. Could I have quit my job, packed my car, cut my hair, and traveled the world? No. That wasn’t an option for me, so I started small. 
      You don’t have to make giant life-altering decisions to live your truth. Why not explore your love of writing by journaling for five minutes each day? There is much satisfaction from small changes that ultimately honor the real you. Take your time and discover the real you at your own pace; even one thing a week can lead to big changes! Every step forward unveils something new. Have fun and enjoy the process. 
      Living my most authentic life is non-negotiable. Our individuality is what makes us special, and we need to honor that uniqueness time and time again. Standing in your truth might be scary, but it’s what we are called here to do. Explore the freedom in being unapologetically you 365 days a year. Celebrate what you love about yourself, step into the light, and one step at a time, you will get closer and closer to living your most authentic life. More

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      in beauty and fashion

      Everything I Want to Buy After Binging ‘Emily in Paris’

      by

      A few months ago, I wrote about my current fashion muse and the joys of having a fictional character that inspires you to get out of your comfort zone with your wardrobe. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, it has you throwing your plain, grey sweaters aside and filling your cart up with pieces you never knew you’d touch.To absolutely everyone’s surprise, 2020 just delivered us something we didn’t know we needed, yet another fictional fashion icon: Emily, from Netflix’s new Emily in Paris. Played by the fabulous Lily Collins, as our Graphic Designer Kelly said in our weekly meeting yesterday, “She just makes you want to embrace maximalism.” Not only are her outfits made impeccable by the addition of the backdrop of Paris, but they all have the je ne sai quoi of looking like she effortless threw five different colors and patterns onto her body—and more often than not, topped it off with a wild hat—and they somehow just worked. 
      After binging the series in one weekend (naturally), our carts are full of eclectic, out-of-the-box pieces that are, quite frankly, exactly what we need to get out of our quarantine slumps. Get ready for some bright colors, a lot of prints, and hell, even a beret or two.

      Source: Netflix

      Wool Blend Beret

      Emily rarely leaves her apartment without some form of a hat (often a bucket hat, but I’m choosing to respectfully ignore that), and the standout was, by far and large, her series of berets. I bought a beret last year and wore it endlessly throughout winter, and Emily encouraged me to pick up another one to wear this year. Trust me: it’ll make you forget about your collection of pom hats.

      Knit Houndstooth Cardigan

      A good houndstooth makes an appearance a million times in this show, and this cardigan with gold detailing fits the Parisian-chic bill.

      Source: Netflix

      Arin Bouclé Trench Coat

      One of my favorite looks of the series is a quick scene (where Emily meets Camille, who is also a font of chic style inspo), but the coat is perfection. I haven’t loved a bold coat this much since my J.Crew obsession in 2008, but if I’ve learned anything from “Emily in Paris,” it’s that I should work some bright color back in my wardrobe.

      Jeffrey Campbell
      Bourdin Mary Jane Pump

      Emily basically wears only heels throughout the entire series, which in addition to giving me extreme anxiety because she is indeed wearing them on cobblestone streets, inspired me to be more daring about my footwear choices. These Mary Jane pumps combined with tights, a skirt, and a jacket are the makings of a perfectly Parisian look to wear all winter long.

      Faux Fur Jacket

      Emily’s coats are abundant and all statement-making, and I’d confidently state on the record that nothing is more statement-making than a hot pink fur coat.

      Source: Netflix

      Double Breasted Suit Jacket

      While I’m not going to be trotting out any crop tops to work, I do love the myriad of jackets and blazers Emily tosses over them.

      Silky Scarf

      One of the best parts of Emily’s style is that it feels true to what an American girl would wear in Paris (bonjour berets!), and the scarves are no exception. I love how she pairs them under cardigans and jackets for a silky pop of texture.

      Source: Netflix

      Wool-Blend Shacket

      At Emily’s influencer lunch, she wears a green Chanel jacket that, quite literally, took my breath away. Everything from the tailoring to the color was sheer perfection, and while this jacket is slightly more muted than hers was, the structure and pockets are nearly identical—and you don’t need to shop vintage Chanel to own it.

      Textured-Weave Jacket

      Emily wears a tweed jacket (or 10) throughout the series, and it got me thinking “Why do I have absolutely nothing made out of this incredibly chic material” and googled tweed jackets for hours after. This textured jacket screams Emily—especially paired with a mini skirt and heel.

      Source: Netflix

      Houndstooth Tweed Bomber Jacket

      There are several memorable houndstooth moments throughout the series, and it has completely reignited my love of the fabric. This bomber is the perfect mix of classic and trendy—pair with a bright dress or a complimenting pattern for an Emily-approved look.

      Quilted Chain Bag

      Emily has a series of impeccable Chanel bags to match every outfit, and while we aren’t all on a Chanel budget, we can emulate the classic bags with this (much, much, much) less expensive option. Its quilted details and gold hardware will give you the same feel of classic femininity that Emily’s bag collection gives her.

      Source: Netflix

      Jacquard-Knit Cardigan

      A wild print? That’s what Emily lives for (not to mention that H&M literally styled this with a collared shirt and plaid skirt—which is arguably exactly how she’d wear it).

      Source: Netflix

      Ruffled Cotton Blouse

      I was so into the extraordinarily ruffled shirt Emily dons to hide her outrageous hickey that I immediately bought this top. I can’t wait to pair it with that houndstooth bomber or a classic plaid blazer.

      Collared Pearl Sweater

      One of the most joyous things about this series for me was the excessive amount of statement collars that Emily wore—and what makes a collar a statement more than some pearl embellishments? Emily would approve on all fronts.

      Colburne Colorblock Coziest Textured Yarn Cardigan Sweater

      When I wasn’t busy falling for Gabriel, I was falling for all the cardigans Emily is running around in (the girl changes outfits on this show at the drop of a bucket hat). The color-blocking of this one is perfect. Throw on a scarf and you’re good to go.

        More

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      in beauty and fashion

      Harry Styles Is My Fall Fashion Inspiration—Here’s How I’m Copying His Most Popular Looks

      by

      Because I’m only going a few select places this fall, my wardrobe is shifting quite a bit, but probably not in the way you’d expect. The “trendiness” of my fashion sense has gone up about ten-fold. If I’m wearing an outfit anywhere, it’s going to be to the nine’s because what other excuse do I have to dress?! I’ve pretty much always dressed with the season’s trends in mind, but I’ve taken it to another level in fall 2020. The icon I’m using for all of my inspiration this fall? Harry Edward Styles. 🥰Does anyone remember that tweet that was like, “Does Harry think we just like the music or does he know that we would actually die for him?” I relate to that a lot. While I obviously fantasize about our adorable children (Xander Styles … is that not the coolest name on Earth?) and the miraculous love life we’d have together, I also just am absolutely enamored with him in every facet. His music? Revolutionary. The fact that he’s socially-conscious and aware? A dream. His sense of humor? Pretty good; I’m still thinking about that Sara Lee skit almost a year later. I’ve never seen a single interview with Harry Styles that makes me be like, “Ah, this guy’s overhyped.” He presents himself in the best way, and that, obviously, includes his style.
      I was a One Direction stan in high school, and I still follow about 10 Harry Styles accounts on Twitter and Instagram just for updates about his whereabouts. But the best account I follow is the Harry Styles Fashion Archive, which shares his exact pieces and outfits. After scouring that account for about an hour on a Saturday morning a few weeks ago, I pinned hundreds of Harry-inspired looks on my Pinterest board to copy this year. In the name of sharing everything about me on the Internet, I’ve put together Harry’s key pieces to get the look, plus a few outfits of his I’m dying to recreate. Turn on “Woman” and gush over HS with me!

      Key Pieces
      There are a few key items you can add to your wardrobe if you want to Harry-fy it just a bit. There’s no need to go full Gucci model to get inspired by his style; instead, grab a few of these pieces and mix-and-match with your personal style to make it your own. Basically, “There’s a piece of you in how I dress” is about us. It’s our Harry Styles capsule wardrobe if you will. 

      Old Skool Sneaker

      If Harry’s wearing a sneaker, it’s usually these. Pair them with trousers, denim, leggings, and more to make any look more casual.

      Stella and Haas
      Band Ring

      Harry’s always wearing rings, usually one on every single finger. Layer up your rings in your metal of choice (Harry’s a silver guy, which I can appreciate).

      Rayon Long-Sleeve Blouse

      Harry absolutely loves to layer. He almost never just wears a sweater; he always pairs a button-down collared top underneath. This is a super simple way to upgrade your sweater collection with one simple piece.

      Chinese Laundry
      Finn Bootie

      For Harry’s more dressed-up looks, he’s almost always in leather or suede booties. These are a great heel height, so you can walk in them all day long.

      Alice&Wonder
      United We Vote Tee

      Harry is a graphic tee fiend, and I’ll bet he has a few great voting tees in his closet as we speak. Not only is Harry Styles a talented musician, a lovely-looking person, and a great actor (we’ve all seen “Dunkirk,” right?), but he’s a huge supporter and ally of the LGBTQ+ community and Black Lives Matter. I have a feeling Harry wants us all to vote in 2020—even if he’s not a U.S. citizen.

      Wide-Leg Twill Pants

      You’ll be hard-pressed to find a picture of Harry in a skinny pant since 2018. He lives and breathes wide-leg and flare trousers and jeans, especially when they have a pattern like these plaid ones. If the wide-leg scares you, wear these with a bodysuit to keep your shape.

      LaPierre Cosmetics
      Nail Lacquer

      Harry always has manicured nails, usually in a fun, bright shade (or multiple—he loves rainbow nails!). His nails usually ever-so-slightly match a point in the outfit or the color scheme.

      Sam Edelman
      Notched Collar Wool Blend Coat

      In the fall and winter, Harry always dresses up his looks with a wool coat, often in camel or black. You’ll wear this to death, so we recommend investing if you can!

      Knit Sweater

      You’ll always see Harry in bright sweaters (like the green below!), especially in situations where he can color-block, a major fall trend. But if you’re not quite ready to wear something bright, this sweater also comes in a gorgeous beige I could also see Harry wearing. It’s all in the preppy details.

      Copy His Outfits

      wide-leg pants / green sweater / sneakers / pearl necklace
      The second I saw this outfit, I wanted to compile every piece and wear it myself. This is certainly the most “out there” look on this list, but that’s why I love it. Harry isn’t afraid of mixing colors and styles that seem counterintuitive. The hardest item to source was a sweater—Harry loves his graphic sweaters, but of course, they’re all astronomically priced—but I quickly found a green option that would work just as well. I love how the pearl necklace (a staple in Harry’s closet the last year or so) and trousers dress up this bright sweater and sneakers combo.
      If this outfit was a Harry song, it’d be: “Sunflower, Vol. 6”
       

      black skinny jeans / leopard button-up / gold ring / ankle boots / canvas tote
      This is a classic Harry look circa 2015. At the tail end of One Direction (gone, but never forgotten), Harry sported a version of this look basically every single day: button-up, black skinny jeans, and ankle boots. And even in 2015, I was furiously pinning it to my Pinterest style board. He’s found a way to make even basics look chic, typically by adding a cool bag (I think he’d appreciate this one from Etsy), lots of rings, and unbuttoning the top just enough to see his glorious tattoos.
      If this outfit was a Harry song, it’d be: “Sign of the Times”
       

      black trousers (plus-size option) / organza top (option 2) (plus-size) / black heels / pearl earrings / nail polish
      When I imagined this article, this wasn’t a look that immediately came to mind, but as I kept staring it, I realized this is actually quite an easy outfit to put-together for normal life, just with an added HS flair. Whether you’re going to a wedding this fall (don’t forget your mask!), happy hour on a patio, or just having a pretend girls’ night, this outfit should be top of mind. Tuck the top into the trousers to give the illusion that you’re wearing a jumpsuit, and don’t forget the classic Harry manicure—it truly completes the look.
      If this outfit was a Harry song, it’d be: “Lights Up”
       

      button-up / sweater vest / trousers (plus-size option) / loafers / sunglasses
      I went into our office twice this week, and somehow, I managed to wear a sweater vest both days. I can’t quit. I never thought I’d be so into the preppy style, but staring at photo after photo of Harry Styles absolutely rocking them has convinced me that it’s a must-have. Harry has made this his uniform lately, pairing it atop a button-up with wide-leg trousers and loafers. For a little extra ‘70s the HS way, add big, square sunglasses. Watermelon sugar hiiiiigh.
      If this outfit was a Harry song, it’d be: “Adore You”

      graphic tee / shacket / flare jeans (plus-size + budget-friendly option) / sneakers / cherry earrings
      Harry’s collection of graphic tees make me gasp every time. I love every single one, from the Christopher Kane “Sex” T-shirt (and pajama top!) he wore on SNL to the “But Daddy I Love Him” shirt he was seen wearing in NYC (the same weekend I was there—not saying it’s a conspiracy or anything, but …) to his very own merch while performing with Lizzo (game recognize game), he has mastered the art of the graphic tee, something I cannot say for myself. I love how he dresses them up and makes them look even cooler with plaid jackets and blazers, plus some extra pizazz whether it’s his jewelry, a fun nail design, or a statement pant. For this inspo, I’m head-over-heels for these cherry earrings—they’re handmade in Argentina by artisans using natural materials like glass, metals, and resin. Definitely Harry-approved. 
      If this outfit was a Harry song, it’d be: “Cherry” (duh!) More

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      in lifestyle and culture

      6 Ways to Be an Advocate for Women of Color in the Workplace

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      The workplace can present tricky situations and conversations to navigate for anyone. As we work as a nation towards actual change, it’s important to understand the places and ways where white people can make a difference and implement change, not just internally, but also on an organizational level at work. Being a leader, amplifying the voices of BIPOC colleagues, and advocating for BIPOC in the workplace are just some of the responsibilities of being a white ally. Your BIPOC coworkers shouldn’t feel as though they’re on their own. We connected with Dominique Fluker, Senior Contributor at ForbesWomen, to find out more about some of the most effective ways to be an advocate for your BIPOC coworkers—and why it’s so essential.

      1. Embrace discomfort
      Being an ally is going to come with feelings of discomfort. The conversations have the potential to be anxiety-provoking, like any road less traveled would be. Further, there could be an underlying guilt or shame behind the feeling of wishing you had done more sooner. The term ‘growing pains’ wasn’t coined without reason—with change of any kind comes uncomfortable situations, and embracing that idea will be a part of creating change. Acknowledge that in being an advocate for BIPOC in the workplace, you’re probably going to be faced with conversations or scenarios that you haven’t yet faced, and just because their newness doesn’t provide the same comfort as a routine scenario would, doesn’t mean they aren’t worthwhile. Discomfort and advocacy in the workplace are part of the necessary evolution we all need to have an active hand in creating. 

      Source: Bonnin Studio | Stocksy

      2. Amplify Voices
      Amplifying the voices of BIPOC in the workplace means more than posting infographics on social media. While that is a good first step, we asked Fluker the best ways to advocate. “Some powerful ways women can advocate effectively for WOC is to praise their work product, defend, and elevate them to the roles of senior leadership. Too often, you find Black women diminished and silenced within the workplace. Given the times that we’re living in, I encourage women to actively and not passively advocate for WOC and Black women in the workplace. We’re more than capable of making the tough leadership decisions and being visible on strategies and executing them.” Dominique highlighted key words: praising, defending, and elevating BIPOC in the workplace in an effort to make change. These verbs together all lead to amplifying the voices of BIPOC and give people a clear call to action in regards to what to do to be an advocate in the workplace. 

      Source: rawpixel

      3. Learn to Support in Multiple Ways
      We can all say that we support racial equality and that we want to have a hand in the change, but what does that really mean? Having the thought is a good start, but Dominique outlined clear ways to amplify BIPOC women in the workplace, and a lot of that amplification stems from trust. “Trust us to do our jobs well and support our creative ideas, without constantly second-guessing or doubting our abilities,” said Dominique. Trust is essential to teamwork and success in a workplace environment, and would build a solid foundation of support for your BIPOC colleagues.
      With a foundation solidified, other ways of support can come into play. “Elevate our voices, listen to our opinions, and encourage us to speak out more. Advocating publicly doesn’t JUST mean praising our work product and ideas, but it can also look like mentorship, sponsorship, and acceptance. Most Black women in corporate and in the workplace want to be promoted and paid accurately for our work. We’re now looking for sponsorship within the workplace; a sponsor is a senior-level staff member who’s invested in a protégé’s career success. We want senior leaders to be invested in us, just as much as we’re invested in producing quality and innovative work,” Dominique said. Perhaps in your workplace you’re in a position to shine a light on a BIPOC colleague’s work or success that’s going unnoticed by other senior leaders. By the same token, if you have that ability, you probably have the ability to make an effort to mentor a BIPOC colleague. 

      Source: Studio Firma | Stocksy

      4. Actively Educate
      Committing yourself to diversifying the media you consume, the influencers and accounts you follow, the articles and books you read, and the conversations you participate in revolving around white privilege and racial bias is essential to creating change. As an ally, take the responsibility to educate yourself, and don’t rely on BIPOC to educate you. The more you learn and progress, the more you can educate and help other white people to progress, and incite them to do the same.

      5. Be Unafraid
      “Most times, non-WOC are afraid to come forth and protect Black women in the workplace,” Dominique said. “I encourage all white women to be vocal when they know someone is being treated wrongly in the workplace, and if the employee has too heavy of a workload.” Speaking up for what is right can be scary, but allies must be unafraid of speaking up for change. There is a fear associated with speaking up, but as you flex that advocate muscle more and more, it’ll get stronger and you’ll learn and get better at navigating conversations. The work is far from over, which makes evolution increasingly important.

      Source: rawpixel

      6. Create Resources
      At your job, take note of the development opportunities. From my experience in a workplace environment and in graduate school, typically there are professional development requirements or training requirements, but are there opportunities for you and your colleagues to progress in terms of diversity and equality? Does the place you work for offer trainings around implicit bias and fairness in the workplace? If the answer is no, this is an opportunity for you to speak up about putting some of those trainings, discussions, or forums in place, and in turn, do your part of educating more people and spreading more awareness.
      At the end of the day, it comes down to the actual doing. Fluker said it well: “Don’t be silent. Silence is compliance. To be a true advocate and ally, try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes and think of active and helpful solutions for WOC that won’t always serve you personally. It’s not beneficial to pry and be overly involved in their personal lives or make assumptions about their household and career trajectory. You don’t own Black women. They are your colleagues.” Our peers deserve our acknowledgment, advocacy and respect in the workplace, and we must all take on the responsibility to help push the movement of equality forward. For most people, an office or work environment is where a large chunk of their time is spent, and it should be a place where everyone gets a fair shake. We must do our part, as advocates for BIPOC in the workplace, to make sure that happens.   More

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      in health and weelbeing

      4 Lessons I Learned From Grief—and How They’ve Changed My Life

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      As a child, I remember my friends going over to their grandparents’ homes for the weekend and coming home with mountains of homemade cookies and hand-knit sweaters. Me? I came home from my Grammy’s house smelling of patchouli and incense. I would hop back in the car from East Texas back to Dallas arm-in-arm with a pile of new books from the thrift store, a head chock full of Beatles songs, and lots of stories to chat about on the two-hour drive home.From what you can probably gather, my Grammy wasn’t the typical grandparent that you may have grown up with. She was a nurse dedicated to each and every patient that saw her, an activist for everyone who walked past her, an animal rehabber who took care of everything from chinchillas to possums, and a hippie at heart. When she died in 2017, I was wrecked—and so was everyone else. It wasn’t until I began to deal with my grief in a productive way that I realized something: the people we love leave us with lessons in the smallest, most magical of places—it’s just up to us to find them. 

      1. Life’s too short for boring
      I’ve always been a monochrome girl. I love a nice gray sweater, a fantastic pair of black jeans, and dainty gold jewelry. My room has always been decorated in neutrals (with the exception of an unfortunate satin purple bedspread in the 4th grade), and I’ve always been happy with it. My Grammy, on the other hand? Everything has always, always been an explosion of color. From the tie-dyed peace sign bumper stickers on her red Nissan Cube to the bright shirts and scrubs she wore on the daily to the card she carried as a member of the Red Hat Society, she was a huge proponent of rainbows and color bursts in any and every situation. 
      When she died, I wanted to honor her in little, everyday ways. For me, this looked like adding a rainbow quilt to my bed and a bright-colored tassel to my keys. More importantly, it was a reminder to me that she wasn’t one for normal things—and life was too short to be normal all the time. Loss is heavy, but finding bright spots to remember your loved one by is a way to lighten the load. By finding tangible, small ways to remember the person you lost, the grieving process might just shorten itself.
      My challenge to you: Add a little color to your bedroom with a bright pillow, swipe on some red lipstick, or pick up the bright blue socks from Target instead of the plain white ones.

      It was a reminder to me that she wasn’t one for normal things—and life was too short to be normal all the time. Loss is heavy, but finding bright spots to remember your loved one by is a way to lighten the load.

      2. Spread some love in your loved one’s honor
      As a (sometimes) vegetarian, an animal rehabber, and a seriously political woman, my Grammy did her absolute best to teach my sister, my cousin, and I about how lucky we were to have an Earth that supported us like it did. She also taught us how lucky we were to have animals that roamed the Earth and snuggled up next to us, and she was recycling everything in sight and carrying reusable bags way before it was the cool thing to do. She spent every extra second of her life volunteering somewhere, in some capacity, and I never once heard her complain. From picking up extra shifts as a hospice nurse on top of her normal ER hours and waking up at all hours of the night to bottle-feed injured possums, she never, ever put herself first. 
      In the years that have passed, I’ve become acutely aware of the holes in my community and the world that I could be helping with. Many of us probably understand the dichotomy that often occurs when we lose someone close to us—that balance between honoring someone while remembering they weren’t perfect people—that can add a confusing element to an already confusing time. While I’m sure my Grammy had qualities that were certainly not great, choosing to embrace her love for the world has helped me become a better person in every way. Grief is a messy, convoluted process, and none of it is particularly joyful. However, choosing to embrace and live out the spots in your loved one’s lives that gave them joy is the surest and quickest way to give yourself some spark.
      My challenge to you: Set up a recurring monthly donation to a political candidate that inspires you, go pet the puppies living in cages at your local animal shelter, and rinse the shampoo out of your bottle so you can recycle it, damn it!

      Grief is a messy, convoluted process, and none of it is particularly joyful. However, choosing to embrace and live out the spots in your loved one’s lives that gave them joy is the surest and quickest way to give yourself some spark.

      3. People make all the difference
      After my Grammy died, we had the intensely un-fun job at our hands to go through her things. I found myself near her bookshelves—the exact ceiling-to-floor shelves that had captivated me as a child—picking through the thousands of novels and self-help books that filled out. On the bottom shelf, I found a collection of all of her old high school yearbooks. They were coated in a thin layer of dust, and it was obvious that she hadn’t touched them in a while. I cracked them open, and the inside front and back covers were simply covered with long, handwritten notes about how grateful they were to have met a sweet spirit like her. As a high school teacher myself, I understand how rare it is for any high schoolers to write much more than “have a good summer” in anyone’s yearbook. 
      The truth is, our life is full of tiny little moments and seemingly ordinary encounters that can, quite literally, change lives. Whether we’re in line for an oil change or making friends at work, the same old adage rings true: people will simply never forget how you made them feel. In a world rife with turmoil and heavy with reminders that life can change on a dime, it’s our job to build meaningful relationships and love as well as we can. After all, not a single day is guaranteed.
      My challenge to you: Pick up the phone and call someone you haven’t talked to in a while, write a thank-you note to a teacher who made an impact on you, or make a point to have a true conversation with someone you love.

      The truth is, our life is full of tiny little moments and seemingly ordinary encounters that can, quite literally, change lives. Whether we’re in line for an oil change or making friends at work, the same old adage rings true: people will simply never forget how you made them feel.

      4. Never, ever stop searching for more
      My Grammy was always looking for something. I spent 23 years as her granddaughter before she died, and in that time I saw her explore transcendental meditation, dabble in Buddhist and Hindu prayers, twist herself into yoga positions, burn incense, and convert to Judaism from Methodism. She was on a constant quest for self-improvement, an understanding of the beyond, and a spiritual view of the world. While her method was unorthodox, it also reminds me of how important it is to never stop looking. While religion might be an extreme example, it’s our job to question the world we live in. It’s our job to look into things, to try new methods for life, and to be unorthodox while we still can. 
      Losing someone is a difficult mountain to climb, and it often opens up questions that weren’t there before. However, taking that heartbreak and sadness and making it into a learning experience? I feel like there’s nothing that could honor those we love any better than that. We’re only on this earth for a short while, and making the most of every single second is the only good way to do it.
      My challenge to you: Go to therapy, download an app and dabble in meditation, or crack open a new self-help book that challenges you.

      It’s our job to question the world we live in. It’s our job to look into things, to try new methods for life, and to be unorthodox while we still can. 

      Perhaps the most vivid memory from the week my Grammy died is getting the call that she had passed away and thinking to myself that it was my job to hold everyone else together. We’re a family of close-knit, like-minded women, and my mom lost her mother that day. The way I saw it, I couldn’t let myself cry or be overcome with grief. If I did, I was letting everyone else down and giving us permission to unravel from the inside out. I held my sister’s hand at the funeral and spoke to everyone gathered without a single shake in my voice, and I never, ever let anybody see me cry. 
      In hindsight, all that stoicism did was turn me away from every single lesson my Grammy had ever taught me. Feelings are there for a reason, and the people we love leaving us is staggeringly painful. Instead of sinking into ourselves, we’re all meant to rise up by loving people deeply, constantly bettering ourselves, sending love out in every direction, and doing it dressed in colorful clothes. After all, what’s left without color, light, love, and emotion? Nothing but darkness. When the people we love leave us with good, we have to carry it on. More

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      in health and weelbeing

      10 Books to Read That Remind You Everything Will Be Alright

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      Sometimes being an adult means realizing that you have no idea what you’re doing.  A lot of us have experienced moments where we are completely out of our depth and have no idea how or who to ask for advice and/or comfort.Taking care of our health—mentally and physically—should be a priority, but it’s sometimes hard to figure out and balance that with everything going on in our lives. How do we get through the day? 
      A lot of people have different ways of coping, such as praying, watching Netflix, working out, and exploring new hobbies. In addition to doing all of this, I’ve been asking friends to share some books that remind them that everything will be alright. This list is full of books that have inspired and helped people in my life and across the internet. Sometimes the wisdom of others is just what we need to get us through another week in quarantine. 

      Marie Kondo
      The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing

      Japanese cleaning guru Marie Kondo swept through American pop-culture with her show on Netflix. Our minds are often impacted by our environment, and with the coronavirus keeping us all inside, this is a perfect time to really declutter your home. Cleaning and clearing your environment will help inspire a calm, motivated, and peaceful mindset.

      Shonda Rhimes
      Year of Yes

      Even if you never watched any of her shows, Shonda Rhimes has become one of Hollywood’s most recognized producer-writers. Her first book is a poignant, passionate, and hilarious book about taking opportunities, looking past failure, and chasing dreams. She writes about how saying “Yes” changed her life and how it can change your life as well.

      Terry McMillan
      It’s Not All Downhill from Here

      “It’s Not All Downhill From Here” is a refreshing story of the strength and resilience of ‘’everyday’ Black women. Loretha Curry’s life is going well until a sudden loss turns her world upside down. Loretha will have to gather all of her strength to keep on thriving and to pursue joy, healing, and life in abundance.

      Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows
      The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

      I stumbled upon the Netflix movie on a random weekend over a year ago and was surprised by how heartfelt and inspiring it was. Juliet finds a letter from a man she’s never met who found her name written inside a book. The more they exchange letters, the more she is drawn into the eccentric world of the Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie society, and learns about their hopes and dreams, their books, and the impact of the German occupation on their lives.

      Michelle Obama
      Becoming

      We often look at prominent women like Michelle Obama as always having everything together and that life must be as perfect as it can get.”Becoming” is a beautiful, inspiring memoir that reminds us that even a First Lady of a country like the United States can be just as human as us—unfinished.

      Cheryl Strayed
      Tiny Beautiful Things

      Hearing other people’s stories and being able to learn from them is one of the best ways to help ourselves get over a slump, or find wisdom and courage to change things in our lives. “Tiny Beautiful Things” is a collection of some of the best of Chery’s Dear Sugar advice columns from “The Rumpus.” Chery’s words are heartwarming, compassionate, and insightful and might be exactly what you need to hear.

      Toni Morrison
      The Source of Self-Regard: Selected Essays, Speeches, and Meditations

      As one of the most celebrated and respected American authors of all time, Toni Morrison was well-known for her striking imagery and genre-defying prose and unabiding wisdom. In this book, she gives us a collection of her essays, speeches, and meditations where she writes about social issues, such as woman empowerment.

      Leslie Jamison
      The Empathy Exams: Essays

      This book is an incredibly thought provoking essay collection about something we all need more of: empathy. Regardless of where you are in life or what you’re going through, or if the news has you feeling hopeless about the future, learning and actively practicing empathy will help you be able to understand how you should care for the people around you and yourself. More