More stories

  • in

    5 Tips to Stop Obsessive Thinking

    Obsessive thinking, also known as rumination, is like a hamster wheel or a broken record that plays the same bad song over and over again. It’s like you’re hyper-focused on the negative, whether it’s one bad test score, work presentation, or conversation with a friend that didn’t go as planned. It’s as if our brains work to hold on to the negative experiences and totally forget about all the positive. Rumination can be problematic because it rarely offers new insights or solutions on how to handle a situation. Instead, it emotionally hijacks us and intensifies our negative feelings. So, how can we free ourselves from getting obsessive over negative thinking? Read on for five tools for a less negative you. 

    1. Work on self-awareness 
    The first step in changing any behavior is becoming conscious of it when it’s coming up. In other words, we have to recognize our patterns before we can change them. Often, when we are stuck in a cognitive loop, we engage in a well-established habit. It’s similar to biting nails or checking social media every few minutes—it happens unconsciously. The next time you catch yourself ruminating, think “Stop!” (say it out loud or in your head as a way to break the cycle). I also have my clients practice visualization by imagining putting a negative thought in a trashcan. Whatever works for you, repeat one word or routine every time you notice yourself obsessing over a negative thought.

    2. Name it
    When we are caught in the cycle of rumination, generally there is an underlying fear that something bad is going to happen. You might be obsessing over a mistake at work, an unfinished conversation with your partner, a fight with a friend, or not living the life you envisioned for yourself. Whatever the reason, try to sum up your negative thinking into one single sentence like “I am scared that I’m going to lose my job” or “I’m angry at my friend for the way she treated me.” You gain control by being able to address the real situation. If you can identify your greatest worry or fear, ask yourself, “What’s the worst thing that can happen? Can I handle that?” Most likely, the answer is yes. You’ll deal with it in the moment just like you’ve always dealt with any hardship. This will help remove some of the fear. 

    3. Practice mindfulness
    We spend so much time dwelling on past mistakes or worrying about future events that we rarely spend time in the here and now. The practice of mindfulness can help us reduce our “thinking” and increase our “sensing.” For example, any time you find yourself in “auto-pilot” mode, like if you’re eating lunch at your desk or checking Instagram while you wait for an elevator, try to just sit and be with yourself. Focus on what you see, hear, smell, feel, and taste. This can help ground you in the present moment. When you catch your attention wandering into the past or future, gently guide yourself back to the present moment. Eventually, you’ll realize that the obsessive thought is coming from worry about the future or past, and not rooted in reality. 

    4. Acceptance
    Pause for a moment and identify the source of your worries. A lot of them probably have to do with future projections or past hurts, mistakes, or regrets. Try to accept your situation as it is right now. I know how hard this can be, but I also know that pain and suffering gets worse depending on how we think about it. Accept your current state as it is. Stop wanting things to be different. When you find yourself obsessing about the past or worrying about the future, ask yourself, “Can I do anything about this right now?” If the answer is no, do your best to accept what is. Take a deep breath and do something that brings you joy. If the answer is yes, identify what you can do and do it.

    5. Schedule a worry break
    For me, falling asleep has always been difficult because of worry. My thoughts bounced all over the place at bedtime: relationships, body image, career, finances, the future, and what I was going to eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. It was exhausting and it kept me awake and anxious. Eventually, I found that allowing myself a short period of time to worry (about 15-30 minutes) helped me have better boundaries. During the “worry time” I write down what’s on my mind. At night when my thoughts keep me awake, I say to myself, “Nothing is going to get solved right now, it’s time to sleep. You can think about it tomorrow.”
    Like any new skill, it takes practice, repetition, and self-love. Be compassionate with yourself and remember you don’t have to do it all at once—don’t feel like you’ve failed if you have a fearful or anxious thought. However, if obsessive thoughts are affecting your life or hard to get over, we recommend seeking a therapist who can help.

    3 Types of Negative Mindsets That Can Cause Real Harm—And How to Overcome Them More

  • in

    Small, Easy Changes to Make If You Want to Lose Weight

    As a health coach, I’ve found that many clients feel uncomfortable saying they’d like to lose weight, as if it’s materialistic or wrong. They’ll preface a goal to lose 15 pounds with “I know weight doesn’t matter, but…” On the flip side, other clients feel like they’re supposed to want to lose weight, even if they feel great as they are, because weight loss and diet culture are so normalized. When I ask why weight loss is a goal, they’ll answer with “I don’t know, isn’t that healthy?” (The short answer: No, it’s not. “Healthy” is doing whatever makes you feel your best)
    So here’s my preface: Instead of shaming yourself for whatever goal you do or don’t have, listen to your body, respect other women’s health goals, and know that what makes you feel good in your body is going to be different from anyone else. Now that we have that out of the way, if weight loss is a goal you know will help you feel energized, confident, and healthy, here are 11 easy weight loss tips you can follow to get you there.
     
    1. First of all, chill out
    Whether it’s around the holidays when we’re eating more sugar cookies or after 2020 when we did nothing but wait for the new binge-worthy Netflix show to drop, it’s normal for weight to fluctuate. Weight gain does not mean anything besides just that: You gained weight. It doesn’t mean you’re less attractive, strong, or lovable. It simply means your body is adjusting to a changing routine, and that’s OK. Your routine, lifestyle, and needs should change week to week, season to season, and year to year, and so should your body. Stress over weight gain is worse for your body than a bag of potato chips or carton of ice cream, so try not to feel guilt, shame, or stress. Instead, know that your body is doing what it’s supposed to. If you want to lose weight because you feel less connected to your body and just overall less healthy, then I commend you for knowing your body well enough to identify what it needs. But prioritize losing the shame around weight gain before losing the weight.
     
    2. Don’t ignore cravings
    Cravings are not your body’s way of sabotaging weight loss or health goals. Cravings are actually one of the key ways our bodies communicate with us what they need. Plus, if we have a major craving for delicious tacos and force ourselves to eat another boring salad instead, it can lead to bingeing, restrictive eating, and an unhealthy relationship with food. Now that will sabotage your health goals. 
    Instead, find alternatives with nutritious whole foods to nourish your body. For example, if you have a sweet tooth, grab a square of dark chocolate after dinner. If you’re craving chips or fries, DIY sweet potato fries, or if comfort foods are more your medicine of choice, try a cauliflower crust pizza or spaghetti squash to sneak in some extra veggies. For any other craving, check out these recipes to find a healthier alternative. Bottom line: Honor your body’s cravings in a way that will fit in as many nutrients as possible. 
      

    3. Take a work break with movement
    You know when you mindlessly reach for your phone to scroll through Instagram or Tiktok after finishing a major task you’ve been working on for hours? Even though it’s a mindless habit, there’s actually a reason we reach for our phones throughout the workday–either your brain needs a break or you need a few minutes “off” to transition into the next task. The answer to break the habit (and help you lose weight) is not to push through and keep working. Honor your body and give it what it needs: a break. But instead of reaching for your phone, get up and move. Do some stretching, go through a yoga flow, or do 10 jumping jacks. Not only will movement help you refocus and reenergize better than an Instagram scroll ever would, but it’s also an easy way to fit in more movement and motivate yourself to make better choices for the rest of the day. 10 to 60 seconds of movement may not sound like a lot, but it all adds up to make a huge difference. 
     
    4. Drink more water
    Drinking water is a tale as old as time, but there’s a reason it’s the most basic, universal health hack in the book. For me, drinking a big glass of water first thing when waking up, sipping on a reusable straw throughout the day (I’m partial to these pretty gold ones), and having three drinks at a time to achieve optimal hydration (like lemon water and green juice with my coffee) have made a drastic difference in how my body feels. If I get hungry soon after eating, I drink a big glass of water rather than going straight to the pantry to mindlessly snack (more on that below!). Of course, if I’m still hungry afterward, I’ll eat something nourishing (the body knows what it needs), but I’ve also learned that a lot of hunger cues are actually thirst. Try drinking more water every day and just watch how much better your body feels. 

      
    5. Go on a walk every day
    Intense workout plans don’t always help us achieve health goals like we expect, and it’s often because the harder (or less enjoyable) a routine is, the less likely we are to stay consistent. If your idea of a worthwhile workout is a 60-minute intense HIIT session, you’re more likely to totally forego exercise altogether on days where you don’t have time or are too tired to find motivation. Instead, shift your focus to living less sedentary and moving more often. Whether workouts are a part of your daily routine or you haven’t worked out since P.E. class in high school, make it a goal to go on walks every day. Take your dog for a walk in the morning, go on a walk while listening to a podcast on a work break, or grab your significant other for a stroll in the evening and catch up on your days. Weight loss doesn’t need to come from sweaty workouts or hours spent at the gym. Instead, the secret lies in consistency and moving the body more often in whatever way feels best for you. 
      
    6. Get curious about your eating habits
    Yes, cravings can tell us what our bodies need, but it’s not always about food. More often than not, whenever we mindlessly snack (like snacking while working or watching TV), it’s because our bodies are lacking something else, whether it’s a break, excitement, comfort, or joy. Every time you subconsciously reach for the bag of chips or Cheez-Its, ask yourself if you’re hungry or not. If you are, then great! You’re listening to your body’s cues. Proceed with the snack or make a snack that might feel more fulfilling and satisfying.
    If you’re not hungry, ask yourself what void your body is trying to fill. Are you stressed and your body’s telling you to take a break from work or are you looking for a way to comfort yourself because you’ve been feeling extra anxious lately? Maybe it’s the lack of anything exciting to look forward to, so you’re supplementing with cheesy, delicious snacks that attempt to fill the void (but don’t really!). If you identify it is emotional snacking, try to feed your body in other ways: Take a work break and go for a walk, plan a fun movie night with your roommate, or just give yourself a little extra love. 
      

    7. Stop weighing yourself
    PSA: You’ll see the most drastic changes when you enjoy healthy habits for both the mind and body rather than thinking you have to do them for weight loss. You’ll stop hating yourself when the scale isn’t moving quickly enough and instead will naturally look, feel, and be better when you give yourself the patience, trust, and self-love it requires to achieve health goals. This is not some BS self-help advice—being healthy for benefits like mental health and energy is what made the most drastic changes in my body (oh, and it was actually sustainable). When you’re focused on a number on the scale, you naturally feel more stressed, restricted, and disappointed. Instead, focus on how you feel to measure where you are. Don’t rely on an objective number to tell you how you’re supposed to feel. 
      
    8. Turn workouts into a social activity 
    Workouts don’t have to be another chore on your to-do list or something you have to force yourself to get through. In fact, you can reframe exercise so it’s as fun as happy hour with your friends and something you look forward to, like catching up with your sister. Especially if you have trouble sticking with exercise, working out with a friend will help keep you accountable and maybe even make you work harder if you’re competitive. Suggest going on a hike with a friend instead of meeting for coffee, start hitting the gym before work with your work wife, or invite your friends to your favorite workout class. Not only will you feel happier with more social connection and turn exercise into something to look forward to, but you’re also more likely to work out since you’ll have a friend to hold you accountable.
     
    9. Eat more vegetables with every meal
    One of the most effective changes you could make is learning about foods and the effects they have on the body. When you’re aware of the nutrients and benefits that come from whole foods, you start to see them as medicine and fuel rather than in categories of “good” or “bad” foods that you’re either supposed to eat or not supposed to eat (and just like bad boys and the cookie jar, we want it more when it’s off-limits).
    Eating more vegetables can not only help you feel your best and start to crave fruits and vegetables (seriously), but it can also subconsciously crowd out processed and sugary foods (totally guilt-free). Do you typically have eggs for breakfast? No need to shift what you’re used to or enjoy. Instead, add some spinach to an omelet or put some avocado on top. Is pasta your go-to? Throw in some kale and asparagus and you’ll never feel deprived, and you’ll be giving your body nutrients that keep it healthy and crowding out the foods that don’t make you feel good.
     

    10. Invest in your health
    There’s a reason pricey gyms and diet programs work (even if it’s only temporarily): When people invest money, they’re more likely to show up. If your workout plan involves YouTube videos or yoga flows on your own and you find yourself never making time for exercise, it might be because you don’t have anything on the line. Try investing in an online subscription, a gym membership, or a pretty yoga mat or pair of dumbbells. Likewise, invest in healthy produce. Because fresh produce goes bad much quicker than a box of mac n’ cheese or a frozen pizza, you’re more likely to go for a meal incorporating the fruits and veggies, if for no other reason than that you don’t want your money to go to waste. There’s nothing more worthy of time and money than your most energetic, happiest, healthiest self, so start spending like it. 
     
    11. Ask yourself “why”
    You already know that setting goals (like “work out more,” “eat healthier,” and yes, “lose weight”) are important so you know what to work toward. But why do you want to reach that goal? Why do you want to lose weight? Is it to feel more confident, to feel less sluggish, or to heal symptoms? The root reason you want to reach your goals is so much more motivating than the goal itself could ever be. As much as you may feel like you want to lose weight or work out more, the feeling of confidence or knowing you’re investing in your future self for a long, healthy life is so much more motivating. 
    Also, reflecting on why you want to achieve your goals will help you find more clarity on how to achieve them (and whether or not you really want to achieve them). For example, if your goal is to be more confident, will losing weight truly help? If you know it would, what other things can you work on while simultaneously trying to lose weight to help boost your confidence? You’ll realize that any health goal (weight loss included) is a holistic process that isn’t just about diet or exercise but about every aspect of your life.

    7 Weight Loss Tips You Haven’t Tried Yet
    (We Promise)

      More

  • in

    7 Workout Benefits That Are More Important Than How Many Calories You Burned

    Fitness trackers and watches can be a blessing and a curse. They give us insight into our workouts, bodies, and rest and recovery, but they also provide us with data that is easy to obsess over, like how many calories we burn during a workout. While it can be rewarding to feel like you got a good burn after an intense workout, it’s important to remember that exercise is about much more than that. Next time you lace up for a run, swing a kettlebell, or clip in for a cycling class, focus on these seven workout benefits that are more important than calories (I promise!) and watch how your relationship with exercise changes as a result.

    1. How you physically feel
    After a good workout, there’s an unmistakable feeling of accomplishment, adrenaline, and pride that can’t be beat. Exercise opens the blood vessels to allow more blood to the muscles, which makes the body feel refreshed. The heart rate comes down, which brings an overwhelming sense of calmness to the body, and adrenaline and endorphins flow through the body. No matter how challenging the workout, the way your body feels afterward is almost always worth it. By celebrating this feeling (as opposed to a numerical metric), you’ll start to look forward to exercise instead of it being another item on your to-do list.  The next time you work out, pay close attention to how your body feels afterward and how that feeling impacts the rest of your day.

    2. How you mentally feel
    The famous Legally Blonde quote about how exercise makes people happy (“and happy people just don’t kill their husbands!”), is not just iconic, it’s true (well, at least about the exercising making people happy part): Exercise increases the brain chemicals that are responsible for a boosted mood. “Physical activity stimulates various brain chemicals that help you feel happier, more relaxed, and less anxious,” explained Dr. Kristin Hughes, MD, a board-certified emergency medicine physician and concierge health strategist. When you make a workout part of your everyday routine, you’ll notice big changes in your mood, emotional outlook, and stress levels, which are much more impactful than caloric burn.

    3. Progress made
    Calories are a measurement of how much energy the body expends, which means that as you get more fit, your calories burned per workout should decrease since your body will be expending less energy as it adapts. The better you get, the less calories you’ll burn, and therefore, using calories as a measure of success is a losing game. Instead, put more focus on the progress you’ve made, whether it’s increasing weights, speed, number of reps, or increased confidence. The next time you start a workout, look for all the ways you’ve improved. If you’re just starting out, make sure to take note of where you’re at so you can measure your progress as it happens.

    4. Strength gained
    While physical strength is majorly important for a healthy and happy life, nothing compares to the emotional strength that regular exercise provides. Completing a tough workout is a major accomplishment, and the “I can do anything” feeling you get afterward can have a domino effect on the rest of your day. Whether your exercise affirmation is “If I can get through this, I can get through anything” or “I am strong enough to conquer all of today’s challenges,” a good workout will remind you that you are stronger than you think. Calories or weight can’t measure strength, so start taking note of which workouts make you feel like a superhero and proceed with your day accordingly. 

    5. Commitment and dedication to yourself
    Following through with our commitments to others is often a non-negotiable in careers and relationships, but our commitments to ourselves can easily be the first things we abandon when life gets busy and overwhelming. By dedicating time for your body and honoring that commitment, you tell yourself (and others) that you value your own needs, and that attitude will rub off on the rest of your life. Filling your own cup is necessary for a balanced life, and spending time doing something that benefits you, makes you feel good, and improves your day is something you should be proud of. By honoring your commitment and dedication to yourself, you’re putting yourself in a better position to serve others, and that’s something to celebrate. 

    6. Energy levels and sleep patterns
    Maybe you no longer need a 3 p.m. coffee pick-me-up because you have more energy when working out regularly, or you’ve been falling and staying asleep more easily at night since having a consistent exercise routine. Working out affects energy levels and sleep, which is way better motivation to move your body than a calorie burn could ever be. The next time you crush a workout, take note of how much more awake, alert, and attentive you feel throughout the day and how easily you fall asleep at night. Burning calories is great, but if you don’t have the energy to get through your day, what’s the point?

    7. Your self-esteem
    More important than any other aspect of physical fitness is how it affects our relationship with ourselves. Fitness trackers can’t measure your confidence, pride, success, or self-esteem, but those things are far more important and longer lasting than calories burned or weight lost. Whether you’re improving as an athlete, see positive physical or emotional changes, feel less stressed, or are simply honoring more time for yourself, pay close attention to how your workouts impact your self-confidence and start using that as a metric of success. Calories are cool, but confidence is everything.

    8 Proven Benefits of Exercise
    (That Have Nothing to Do With Weight Loss) More

  • in

    The Crucial Thing Missing From Your Workout Routine

    So you know to prioritize both cardio and strengthening, fit in a walk or yoga flow even when you don’t have time for a full workout, and eat nutritious food to help your body feel its best while exercising. But the one crucial part of a healthy fitness routine you might be neglecting? Stretching. Stretching is not just an excuse to nap in Savasana for five minutes or for impressing your friends by doing splits during a night out (looking at you, Kyle Richards).
    Stretching keeps the body flexible, strong, and healthy. When your muscles are flexible, they’re able to maintain a range of motion to prevent injuries and improve both endurance and strength. In other words, a flexible body is a healthy body. Yes, we need to stretch to accompany our workouts, but we also need to stretch to relieve tension, counteract the effects of sitting all day, and improve the overall health of the body. 
    You don’t need to dedicate an hour a day or change your entire routine to stretch more. To prove it, we rounded up a list of obé Fitness stretching classes that range from a quick five-minute flow to a 30-minute sculpt workout that fits in the stretching for you. Whether you prefer to give your muscles some extra love during your morning routine, night routine, before a workout, after a workout, or throughout your workday, there’s an obé class for you. Scroll on to find the stretching sequence that appeals to you—your muscles can thank me later. 
    For 50% off your first month and a free 7-day trial, use code “TEG50” at checkout!

    If you’re on your lunch break or taking a quick 10-minute break, this is the stretch for you. It’s meant to not only stretch out your entire body from head to toe but is also meant to energize you. Think of this stretch series as your 3 p.m. coffee alternative. Trust me, you won’t need a shot of espresso when you use this to treat your afternoon slump. 

    PSA to runners, joggers, and cardio-lovers: You need to be stretching. Not only is stretching before and after cardio workouts crucial in preventing injuries, but properly preparing your muscles can also help improve endurance and speed. Try this stretching warmup, whether you’re about to hit the treadmill or sprint on a track. 

    If mornings are your sacred time to prepare your mind and body for the day ahead, I got you. For those of us who prefer to wake up slowly and peacefully instead of rush right into a workout first thing in the morning, this flow will help center you and energize you after waking up while also providing you with calm energy to take on your day. 

    Picture this: You crushed a killer leg day yesterday and now it’s painful to walk. Or maybe you keep a lot of tension in your hips (guilty!), and your hamstrings and glutes are always tight. Look no further than this lower-body stretch, designed to gently open up your hips and stretch out the hamstrings. 

    I get a lot of tension headaches, and after my doctor suggested the tension was coming from my neck, shoulders, and upper back, I started doing this five-minute neck and upper back stretch every day. Spoiler alert: My tension headaches went away. This is also good for tech neck (also guilty) or people who sit at a desk all day (AKA most of us). 

    If you’re a seasoned stretcher who wants something that goes a little deeper than your normal body stretches (but without paying for fancy equipment you most likely won’t use), good news. All you need to get deeper and stretch every muscle group in the body is a chair. Grab the one from your office or a dining chair from the kitchen and give your muscles a little TLC. 

    By now, you know you need a dynamic stretch at the beginning of your workout to warm up, but it’s just as important to do a cool down stretch to help release and stretch out the muscles that just put in a lot of hard work. Whether you prefer jogging, barre, or yoga, try this cool down stretch after your workout of choice to prevent soreness and lengthen muscles. 

    If you swear you don’t even have five minutes to spare during your busiest days, you can still fit in a good stretch to help your body feel its best. All of these stretches can be done at your desk. That’s right, you can get a full-body stretch in while sitting in your chair. Try these movements while transitioning between tasks at your desk or even while you’re in a Zoom meeting (but insider tip: turn your camera off). 

    If you prefer stretching to be seamlessly incorporated into your workout or you only have 30 minutes a day to dedicate to your body, try this combo stretch and sculpt class. You’ll be toning and strengthening all the important muscle groups, and then stretching out what you just worked for lengthened muscles and a healthier body. 

    Got 10 minutes to spare but don’t know where to start? This full body stretch goes through all the best basics to relieve tension and stretch out every muscle group in the body. Whether you’re wrapping up a workout, taking a lunch break, or just want to move your body for an extra 10 minutes throughout the day, give your entire body some TLC with these stretches. 

    Certain stretches are the perfect way to wake up and energize the body, but other stretches can work to relax the body for your most peaceful night of sleep ever. These stretches improve your mobility and flexibility like other stretches, but the sequence is also designed to release tension from the body and leave you in a blissed out state by the end. Pro tip: Do these stretches in your PJs because you’re going to want to hop right into bed when you’re done. 

    If I haven’t convinced you to stretch more yet, this will probably do it. Whether you just wrapped up a tough workday or you would never miss a happy hour, kill two birds with one stone by having your glass of wine while stretching the body.
    Sure, this is just a regular series of amazing stretches you can do without wine at any time of day (or with any beverage of choice), but I like this idea of fitting in whatever feels best for you. It’s a good reminder that you don’t have to be on a yoga mat, have on your workout clothes, or be at the optimal time to get a stretch in. You can stretch whenever, wherever, and however feels best for you, so fit it in where you can and make it as enjoyable as possible (yes, even if that means with a glass of Pinot Noir). 

    Sit at a Desk All Day? We Asked a Physical Therapist What To Do About It

    This post is sponsored by obé, but all of the opinions within are those of The Everygirl editorial board. More

  • in

    12 Self-Care Practices You Haven’t Thought Of (That Are Completely Free)

    The buzzword “self-care” is certainly having a moment, but the concept of caring for your mind and body is not going anywhere. It’s easy to get swept up in work, friends, relationships, and to-do lists, and our own wellbeing often gets put on the back burner. Most of us are more comfortable prioritizing other people over ourselves, and we forget that self-care actually helps put us in a better state to provide for the other people in your life. We cannot be the best versions of ourselves if we are not practicing regular self-care and attending to our own needs. 
    But self-care looks different to everyone. What makes me feel good may not be so relaxing to you, and vice versa. The great thing about the rising buzz factor of different self-care methods is that there really is no shortage of options. The potential downside is that many of these options come with a price tag (looking at you, pricey bath salts and candles). To help us all add a little self-care into our lives without breaking the bank, I caught up with Morgan Raphael, creator of the Self-Care Society, to put together a list of 12 self-care practices you can start today (and not one of them requires your credit card).

    Meet the expert
    Morgan Raphael
    FOUNDER OF THE SELF-CARE SOCIETY
    Morgan is a wellness blogger, entrepreneur, and creator of the Self-Care Society, a community and resource for women to prioritize their mental health.

    1. Start a daily journaling practice
    There are so many great options out there when it comes to a daily journal with prompts, affirmations, and quotes. Morgan has her own version (which I love and highly recommend), but it can be just as impactful to simply put pen to paper on your own. Set aside a few minutes at the start or end of your day to do a “brain dump” and release those pent up emotions that may otherwise stay locked in your head.

    2. Make a daily gratitude list
    Practicing gratitude is huge when it comes to manifesting more good things into your life and is an extremely beneficial method of self-care that costs absolutely nothing. Start small by simply listing out three to five different things that you’re grateful for each day. But don’t just scribble out the basics—take time to appreciate each thing on your list and why you are grateful for it. The more gratitude you practice, the more you will find to be grateful for.

    3. Go for a walk (without headphones)
    For me, walks are crucial. I love stepping outside with no destination and no scrolling. I purposely take this time to myself without any music or distractions so I can really tune into my thoughts and how I am feeling. You will be so surprised with the amazing ideas you have and clarity you gain when you just take 5-10 minutes to unplug, get outside, and move the body.

    4. Call a friend who always lifts your mood
    Is there someone in your life who always seems to know what to say? Or maybe they always make you laugh, even when you’re in a bad mood? Sometimes the best form of self-care is knowing that you need a friend. Don’t take those friendships for granted and don’t hesitate to lean on the people in your life when you need them. Set aside some time in your busy week to connect with a friend, family member, or coworker who will lift your mood. Bonus: Taking this time for yourself will help you be that person for someone else too.

    5. Write a list of your accomplishments and goals
    Why don’t we do this more often? Goal setting is huge for me, but so is acknowledging what I’ve achieved. If you are ever feeling down about something in your life or you’re comparing yourself to other people, take a moment to list out everything you have accomplished (both big and small), and hold onto that list to come back to the next time you’re questioning yourself. Let’s all celebrate our wins a little more.

    6. Donate 10 items you no longer need
    Hello, Marie Kondo! Having moved nine times in the past 10 years, let’s just say I have perfected the art of tidying up. I have no issue saying goodbye to items that I know no longer serve me. Whether that means a Zara top you bought three years ago and never wore or an old stack of books collecting dust under your bed, never underestimate the power of simply releasing things that you don’t need in your life, and bonus points if you give them to someone who does.

    7. Indulge in a book, movie, or TV show that makes you feel good
    Did you spend your Sunday lounged in front of the TV watching old rom-coms and then feeling guilty about your lack of productivity? Lose the guilt! TV binging totally counts as self-care, and losing yourself in a feel-good show or movie can be a great way to turn off for a bit and recharge. For me, books are the ultimate self-care because it is one thing I know I won’t be multitasking (scrolling) during. Check out these 20 new books to add to your bookshelf ASAP.

    8. Stretch your legs up the wall
    I do this for at least 10 minutes a day, every day, without fail. Legs-up-the-wall is one of the simplest yoga poses and is considered a restorative yoga posture that offers many benefits like helping the body relax and reducing stress. To try for yourself, lie flat on your back with your legs stretched straight up the wall, set your timer for 10-20 minutes and simply relax. Try a guided meditation, listen to a podcast, or even read your favorite book while letting the body be still.

    9. Listen to a favorite playlist or podcast
    Personally, I thrive on building playlists on Apple and Spotify, knowing just what song I need to hear for my current mood. Sometimes that’s a Kygo pump-up song, and other times, it’s a break-up ballad to get those tears out. No matter what your mood, music can totally provide that much-needed release. More of a podcast fan? Choose one based on your mood, whether you need something light-hearted and fun or motivating. Click here for podcasts based on any mood, and click here for 10 of our favorite women-run podcasts. 

    10. Meditate
    This is one of those self-care practices that looks different for everyone. I personally prefer a walking guided meditation, but many people prefer to do their meditations sitting or lying down, reading or journaling, or without any music or prompts at all. No matter your meditation form of choice, there are many free apps and trackers you can download to start your meditation practice, and even just a few minutes a day can be extremely beneficial in relieving stress.

    11. Clean up your space
    Recently, as soon as my schedule got busier and I left my room in a mess every night, I started having trouble sleeping. Once I straightened things up, my sleeping patterns went back to normal. Coincidence? Perhaps, but clutter in your space directly correlates to clutter in the mind. The cleanliness of your home really does impact your headspace, and you should always aim to keep your home the same you would want it to look for visitors (because if visitors can enjoy it in tip-top shape, why shouldn’t you?). Take 15 minutes before bed to put away laundry, wipe off counters, and do the dishes. 

    12. Detox your social media
    Yes, social media can be a great place to discover new people, brands, and products or to catch up with friends and family. But we also can absorb negative content or get caught in comparison traps and feel bad about ourselves from a social media scroll. Take time to regularly go through your accounts and mute or unfollow anyone whose energy does not serve you. Your goal should be to make social media a place that provides you with nothing but joy and inspiration rather than comparison and negativity.

    The Next Self-Care Activity You Should Try
    Based On Your Zodiac Sign More

  • in

    I Asked Shay Mitchell’s Trainer How to Get More Toned—Here’s What She Said

    You know her, you love her, and you grew up with her on Pretty Little Liars and rooted for her in You (I’m a Peach fan forever): Shay Mitchell is the relatable-but-stunningly-gorgeous queen we didn’t know we needed. Despite her unreal mansion, undeniable fame, and multi-million dollar company, she’s relatable enough to be our best friend (I mean, she posts herself eating pizza, so that’s something, right?). But there’s another superstar on her team who helps Shay be, well, Shay, and she’s becoming a celeb in her own right.
    Kelsey Heenan is a celebrity trainer, media personality, keynote speaker, and fitness host. Most recently, she was featured on Shay Mitchell’s workout series (it’s like breaking a sweat with Shay for free and from the comfort of your own home). What impressed me so much about Kelsey is not only that she has a celebrity clientele as impressive as her biceps, but her whole mission is to help people love and accept their bodies through food, nutrition, and mindset shifts. So, being the wellness nerd I am, you know I had to grill Kelsey for all her best nutrition and fitness tips to achieve your healthiest body ever. Read on for nine of her best secrets to crush a workout, eat foods that nourish your body, and help you get toned (Shay-Mitchell approved):

    Meet the expert
    Kelsey Heenan
    Celebrity Trainer, Nutrition Coach, and Co-Founder of HIIT BURN
    Kelsey has been featured in publications like Shape, Women’s Health, Forbes, and Nike Training, and she works with clients to improve their relationship with food, exercise, and their bodies.

    1. Focus on progressive overload
    Between HIIT, yoga sculpt, or good old fashioned strength-training, there’s a lot of confusion over the best type of workout to get stronger, but Kelsey is a big believer that strengthening is as simple as increasing intensity overtime, whatever that looks like to you. Her #1 tip for clients looking to get stronger is progressive overload. “Over time, increase the amount of resistance and tension you are putting on your muscles. Simple examples of this are lifting heavier weights or increasing reps of challenging bodyweight strength movements like push-ups and pull-ups.”
    In other words, be strategic about reps and weights. When you feel comfortable with one weight or rep count, increase slightly for a greater challenge and to strengthen muscles (but make sure it doesn’t sacrifice form so you don’t risk injury!). Also, be patient. Don’t start with 10 pounds and expect to get to 30 pounds by the end of the week. Take a couple weeks to feel comfortable with 10 pounds, increase to 12-15 pounds for a week or two, then move up to 20 pounds, etc. 

    2. Aim for just five minutes
    Spoiler alert: Even celebrity trainers can lack motivation. Whether it’s a busy day, a change in seasons that makes you feel lethargic, or just a period of life where you don’t feel like getting to the gym, Kelsey tells her clients that the most important thing is just to do five minutes of something. “During days and seasons where it feels impossible to stay motivated, commit to moving for just five minutes,” she said. “Stretch, walk, or do some squats and push-ups. Once you start moving, it’s often easier to keep going. If you still aren’t feeling it after five minutes, then be done for the day. Either way, you stayed true to your commitment and did what you said you’d do.” No, you don’t need to fit in a 60-minute intense workout every day to be fit. You just need to commit to five minutes when you’re lacking motivation.

    3. Prioritize whole foods, but be flexible
    I’m a huge fan of Kelsey because even though she’s a celeb trainer and a top expert in health, her approach is, well, approachable. You know I had to pick her brain for her best nutrition tips (because I refuse to believe that Shay Mitchell eats nothing except pizza, as her Instagram portrays). Her answer: Prioritize whole foods, but be flexible. “Prioritize one-ingredient foods for the majority of your meals like meat, veggies, avocado, nuts, rice, fruit, etc., but also enjoy your favorite foods periodically,” she suggested. Your diet should not feel restrictive (that’s just a recipe for failure), and food should not be separated into two different lists of ‘Eat This’ and ‘Don’t Eat This.’” 
    Instead, a healthy diet is a series of mindful choices to nourish your body and mind as much as possible. Kelsey gave an example of being on vacation: If you know you’re hitting up a delicious pizza spot for lunch, choose a veggie omelet at breakfast instead of French toast or split the French toast with the table so you can have a few bites but can still prioritize nourishing protein and veggies. Bottom line: Make choices that make you feel good while still allowing yourself to eat your favorite foods. “If an approach to nutrition is too strict, it will always be a means to an end.”

    4. Make sure you enjoy the workout
    No matter what workout you heard is best for weight loss, toning, or strengthening, it doesn’t matter if you’re not enjoying it enough to want to do it consistently. When you’re busy or unmotivated, you’re not going to do a workout you dread or makes you bored. While Kelsey likes strength training and HIIT, she said the best type of workout is the one you enjoy most. “There are so many ways to work out; the best one is the one you’ll actually do.” You may have to experiment with various types of workouts, gyms, or even playlists for your daily walks, but try new things until you identify the perfect formula that you look forward to and enjoy, and adjust when you start to feel bored of the routine.

    5. Find a balance of cardio and strengthening (that’s right for you)
    As a wellness editor, I get asked all the time if strength-training or cardio is more important and if you really need both. For example, does a runner really need a day of weight-lifting, or does a gym rat really need to spend some time on the elliptical instead of just the weight floor? Naturally, I asked Kelsey, and she gave me all the tea. “Everyone should focus both on getting stronger and regularly getting their hearts pumping, but there are many ways you can do that,” she said.
    Yes, everyone needs a healthy balance of both cardio and strengthening, but that balance will look different to everyone. For strength-training, Kelsey suggested lifting weights, bodyweight exercises, or carrying heavy groceries as ways you’re working the muscles. Likewise for cardio, whether you’re going for a run, walking, doing HIIT, dancing, spin, hill sprints, or chasing your kid around the playground, you’ll be improving cardiovascular fitness for longterm health. “There is no one type of workout that everyone has to do to be healthy. Personally, I don’t like going on long runs and would instead lift weights while getting in cardio with sprints. I enjoy these things and they align with my goals.”

    6. Protein and carbohydrates are key before and after a workout
    So you’ve already mastered the eating-whole-foods-with-flexibility thing? If you’re looking to get even more specific, veggie-filled meals with a balance of fats, protein, and carbohydrates are always important, but Kelsey recommended especially focusing on protein and carbohydrates before and after workouts for energy and recovery. “Before a workout, protein and carbohydrates can give energy, while after a workout, they both help refuel the muscles,” she said. But before you grab protein powders or processed bars, try to refuel using whole foods. Kelsey is a fan of eggs and fruit, chicken and sweet potatoes or rice, and a protein shake with some fruit. But more importantly, get to know what’s right for your body. “Everyone is different, so identifying what foods help you feel fueled well is really important,” she suggested.

    7. Rest is crucial
    Do you feel like you’re lazy or behind if you take a day off? FYI, you’re not lazy or behind, you’re healthy. We’ve talked a lot about why rest days are not only crucial for recovery, but taking time off also helps you be as fit as possible, and Kelsey totally agreed. “Rest is essential,” she stressed. “Rest days help the body and mind repair and recover as well as help avoid injury and burnout.” Take at least one or two days off every week to do light stretching, relaxing yoga flows, or gentle walks. Also, prioritize sleep (yes, that means even before that early morning workout) and never overdo it with your workouts. Listen to your body when it’s asking for a break, knowing that your body cannot be its fittest, strongest, or healthiest without it. 

    8. Honor hunger and respect fullness
    Being toned and healthy is not only about what you eat but also when and how. Kelsey knows that true health is freeing, so she doesn’t coach her clients to count calories, weigh their food, or have intense restrictions. Bottom line: If you’re hungry, eat. “A lot of people try to ignore hunger cues and eat a small meal or wait until the next meal because they feel like they ‘shouldn’t’ be hungry but then end up thinking about food all day, snacking more, or overeating later,” she said. “It’s not a bad thing to be hungrier on some days than others. Honor the body by feeding it when it’s hungry, pay attention to when you are starting to feel full, and slow down to evaluate if your hunger is satisfied.”  

    9. Prioritize your relationship with your body
    We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: Mindset is everything. You can work out every day and eat totally plant-based at every meal, but if you don’t have a healthy relationship with your body, you cannot be truly healthy. Even if you’re looking to lose weight, look more toned, or change the way your body looks in any other way, you can still accept your body for where it is now. “There’s nothing inherently wrong with wanting to make changes to how your body looks, but even in the midst of body changes, we have to practice respect for our bodies,” Kelsey said. “Most people struggle with body image, but no matter your jeans size, it’s crucial to learn to accept the body.” 
    Why is body acceptance so important, besides that your mom used to tell you to love your body when you were in middle school? Negative language about our bodies can cut deep into our self-worth. We start working out and eating nutritious foods as a way to punish or change our bodies rather than because our bodies inherently deserve nourishment as they are. So how do we work on the relationship with our bodies? Kelsey recommended gratitude. “No one is going to love every part of their body every day, but practicing gratitude for what our bodies do for us will help us experience more grace and respect for our bodies.” Now that’s a fitness tip that I can get behind.

    7 Secrets To Maximize Your Workouts From a Personal Trainer

      More

  • in

    The French Girl’s Guide to Self-Care

    “Self-care” has become one of the trendiest buzzwords: We spend money on scented candles, at-home facials, matcha lattes, and quinoa; meditation apps are as popular as the latest Netflix show; and if you’re not glowing with the confidence that comes with “I Woke Up Like This” athleisure style, you’re not doing self-care right. We Instagram our “true selves” with #nofilter and post mirror pictures of our fat rolls because models and fitness bloggers made it fashionable.
    While all of these wellness movements are promoting important (and even revolutionary!) ideas in body positivity and health, I learned after living in Paris that self-care looks a little different to French girls. Parisians do not always feel the need to spend fortunes on health treatments and workout classes, cook the latest health-food crazes from TikTok, or feel stressed out and guilty when they don’t fit in gratitude journaling or meditation. The way they care for themselves is muted, private, and not trend-driven at all. Read on for five lessons I learned about self-care from Parisian women.

    1. They indulge regularly in what they enjoy
    No doubt, Parisians will have a glass of wine with lunch or an Èclair au Chocolat after work for no other reason besides wanting to enjoy it. Because they don’t fight cravings, you’d rarely find a Parisian overindulging. She enjoys every bite because she does not restrict herself from eating what she wants or hate herself when she indulges. PSA: Joy is a nutrient too. Yes, caring for yourself means giving your body nutrients that help you feel your best, but it also means knowing that food (and life) is meant to be enjoyed. 

    2. They accept their flaws
    No one is totally exempt from insecurities and pressure, Parisian or not. We can (and should) all be working on more self-acceptance, but I did notice a difference in how we think about and address our insecurities. When I left for Paris, I had the mindset of covering up flaws with makeup and fake tanner and adapting my beauty routine to whatever was trending or considered “beautiful” in society. I soon learned that covering up flaws is not very French. Parisians know how to accentuate, appreciate, live with, and maybe even love flaws. Makeup is used to emphasize unique features and fashion is used to show off curves instead of hide them. Parisians show up consistently as who they truly are rather than faking the beauty trend, clothing style, or personality du jour. 

    3. They are choosy with friendships
    Maybe you’ve heard the stereotype that the French can be cold or abrupt (I did not find that in my experience, BTW). I don’t think they get this reputation from actually being rude; rather, they’re selective about who they give their time and energy to. When I first arrived in Paris, mon professeur gave me tips on assimilating to French culture. I’ll never forget hearing that topics like religion and politics are commonly discussed with friends, coworkers, and strangers alike. Small talk like the weather that is considered “polite” to Americans is simply boring, and Parisians would rather talk about things that matter, even with a stranger on a bus or during dinner with friends.
    I found that French women are less likely to be “fake-nice” to someone they dislike out of politeness and won’t waste time or energy with people who don’t bring them joy. Therefore, friendships are always deep, meaningful, and lifelong. They find the people they click with and then are fiercely loyal to those friendships. After all, one of the best ways we can care for ourselves is to foster joy in our connections with other people we care about. 

    4. They have rituals that they stick to
    I’ll admit I’m a sucker for basically any new wellness fad or self-care trend (as a wellness editor, I tell myself it’s all for “research”). In France, you’re less likely to find cycling wellness trends or health practices that come and go. Instead, French women have tried-and-true go-tos for when they’re feeling extra stressed or their pores need unclogging (many that they learned from their mothers instead of fashion magazines). Bottom line: They prioritize rituals and routines that work for them instead of what’s making headlines, and they listen to what their bodies need, knowing they have an arsenal of go-to rituals to help it feel its best. 

    5. They prioritize simplicity
    There’s a reason infamous French beauty routines consist of a good moisturizer, a swipe of mascara, and smudged eyeliner: Parisians know that simple is best, and that goes for other areas of life too. Their meals aren’t complicated or packaged. Instead, they keep it simple: a cup of espresso, freshly baked bread, or a homemade salad dressing with Dijon, vinegar, and olive oil. They find pleasure in the details, indulge in whole ingredients, and spend money on the highest quality of fewer things instead of the cheapest, biggest, and fastest. The book French Women Don’t Get Fat explains that French women eat fewer, whole, high-quality ingredients instead of stocking a pantry full of complicated vegan snack foods in the name of health (not to out myself or anything) or grabbing something quick on the go. 

    I Used Self-Care as a Cop Out for Self-Love More

  • in

    10 Celebrity Workouts You Can Try at Home RN

    PSA: Most celebs credit more than just good genes for their I-woke-up-like-this glow or flawless looks. It’s not like there’s something in the Hollywood water that keeps every A-lister in tip top shape and otherworldly beautiful (but if there is, I will get to the bottom of it). Most celebrities have entire teams behind them to help them be their best selves and put in a lot of effort to get fit for a movie or build up endurance for a world tour. 
    Lucky for us, celebrities are no longer just faces in our favorite films or voices on the radio. It’s the age of social media—we can look to the stars for hair inspo or beauty tips and can even use celebrities to plan workouts. Our favorite stars and their famous trainers have been sharing at-home workouts on their social media accounts so that us mere mortals have access to the behind-the-scenes teams, getting our own sip of the Hollywood water. Here are 10 celebrity workouts that you can do (for free!) RN:

    What you’ll need: One set of medium to heavy weights

    What you’ll need: One set of light weights and one set of medium to heavy weights

    3. Lizzo’s Strength Training Intervals

    @lizzoSeen a lot of slim chicks posting they workouts on here so I thought I’d join the fun. If you’re watching this just know you’re beautiful!♬ Tempo (feat. Missy Elliott) – Lizzo

    What you’ll need: Cable ropes and resistance bands or hand weights

    [embedded content]
    What you’ll need: A medicine ball, resistance band, and one set of medium to heavy weights

    What you’ll need: A 10- to 25-pound kettlebell, Bosu ball, and a set of medium weights

    [embedded content]
    What you’ll need: A long resistance band and a set of sliders (or use a folded-up towel!)

    What you’ll need: A Yoga mat or soft surface

    [embedded content]
    What you’ll need: A pair of light to medium weights

    [embedded content]
    What you’ll need: A yoga mat or soft surface
     

    [embedded content]
    What you’ll need: A yoga mat or soft surface

    The Best Workout Equipment You Can Get on Amazon More