health and weelbeing

Behind the tinsel, fa-la-la-la-las, visions of dancing sugarplums, and feel-good Christmas movies is the harsh truth: The most wonderful time of the year is also the most stressful. Before you write me off as the grinch (my ugly-sweater-wearing dachshund proves otherwise), it’s no secret that holiday stress is real. Need I mention the work rush before the holiday break, mad dashes to the mall and airport, and eating all the cookies in sight? Add to that your bank account feeling the pain from extra Starbucks runs, gift exchanges, party hopping, and playing hostess with the mostest. 
In a recent survey of over 1,000 people across the U.S., more than one-third of respondents said their biggest concern about the holidays this year is finances, followed by worry or anxiety, maintaining healthy habits, general busyness/feeling overextended, and feelings of sadness/grief/loss. The silver lining? I asked Dr. Beth Pausic, Director of Behavioral Health at health brand, Hims & Hers, to share her Scrooge-proof tips to combat the top holiday stressors. Take notes for making this season (actually) merry and bright.

Meet the expert
Dr. Beth Pausic
Clinical Psychologist and Director of Behavioral Health at Hims & Hers.
Dr. Beth Pausic is a clinical psychologist and Director of Behavioral Health at Hims & Hers. Dr. Pausic has worked in senior roles at several behavioral healthcare startups. Her experience prior to working in telebehavioral health includes over 15+ years as a Clinical Administrator and Provider in clinical settings.

Make a plan for your finances
Playing Santa isn’t all fun and games. Sure, gift-giving has its perks (seeing your BFF’s  expression when she opens the red light therapy wand you scored for her: priceless), but with the social expectations associated with checking everyone off your nice list, not to mention the inflation we’re battling, it can feel like your wallet can’t catch a break. So how can you avoid a Grinchmas? “The most important thing to do is set a realistic budget for yourself,” Dr. Pausic stated. “Don’t overextend yourself and make your financial problems worse. Be honest about what you can and can’t spend.” And consider alternatives to the usual material gifts, like experiences (think: a fitness or cooking class), plants, DIY goodies (coffee scrub and bath bombs, anyone?), or your time. Talk about gifts that keep on giving!
Dr. Pausic also suggested being open and honest with others about your limits on exchanging gifts or participating in social events. “Having conversations about finances with friends and family can be anxiety-provoking and feel awkward, but if it’s something you’re worried about during the holidays, it’s worth bringing up,” she affirmed. “It’s not easy to allow yourself to be vulnerable and honest when you are in a challenging financial situation, but you are taking better care of yourself by sharing your concerns.” That’s what I call self-care. 

Set boundaries in advance
While worry is a normal everyday emotion we all experience, there’s no denying that the holiday season can add an extra layer of stress (holiday madness is a thing). Because anxiety can present itself in different ways and at varying levels of intensity, continuously having check-ins with yourself, paying attention to your body cues, and increasing awareness of your anxiety triggers can make the difference between a meltdown and a jolly holiday. “If possible, minimize or avoid triggers,” Dr. Pausic advised. “If that isn’t possible, have a plan to address your anxiety by minimizing your exposure to these triggers by removing yourself from the situation, setting limits, and having strategies to help reduce your anxiety in tougher moments.”
Dr. Pausic recommended trying the usual suspects: deep breathing, meditation, and mindfulness. Schedule time for consistent, preventative self-care to help keep tabs on your anxiety and alleviate the effects of it on a regular basis, just like you would your exercise routine. 

Maintain (some) healthy habits
Keeping up with your healthy eating and workout regimen is hard enough on any given day, but throw in frigid temps, packed calendars, and temptations everywhere you turn, and the holidays can make even the healthiest women forego their favorite routines. First off, Dr. Pausic pointed out that we’re inclined to become more sedentary during the winter months, so give yourself a break, but do your best to remain active and–if possible–aim to get some level of physical activity several days a week. Adapt your sweat sessions to the winter months by opting for slower, low-impact sweat sessions, like Pilates or yoga. Your body will thank you. 
So you’ve got holiday soirée after holiday soirée for the foreseeable future, which means food and drinks galore and not enough quality Zzzs. Keep in mind that it’s not all or nothing—instead of swearing off gingerbread cookies and spiked eggnog, enjoy every bite and sip, and listen to your hunger signs. “While you don’t want to deprive yourself, there can be a fine line between holiday indulgence and holiday excess,” Dr. Pausic expressed. “Be mindful if you are eating or drinking more, and plan when you want to indulge and other days when you are a bit more conservative.” And prioritize those 7-9 hours of quality sleep every night to improve your mood, strengthen your immune system, relieve stress, and maintain a healthy weight. Cold and flu season, who?  

Take frequent breaks
From Christmas shopping and white elephant exchanges to holiday travel and family get-togethers—on top of maintaining your “normal” schedule—it’s only natural to feel overwhelmed right now. “If you find yourself feeling stressed about these things instead of enjoying them, it is time to take a break,” Dr. Pausic conveyed. “Don’t agree to every invitation and set realistic expectations for all of your activities during the season. It may seem impossible, but you can say “no”—and don’t forget to take care of yourself.”
Enter: setting boundaries, letting go of “shoulds,” and embracing JOMO. Politely decline any social gatherings that you’d say “yes” to for the sole purpose of satisfying an obligation. Instead of throwing your usual Friendsmas only because your best pals are expecting you to, ask if someone else can take the reins (pun intended). And just because everyone around you is celebrating by decking the halls and baking cookies, you don’t have to partake. Do what feels good for you—even if that means not celebrating at all. Bottom line: Put yourself first. 

Hold space for all emotions
Despite this time of year’s theme of holiday cheer, the holidays have a way of intensifying existing feelings of sadness, loss, and grief. “When we are constantly being exposed to images of happiness, family, and being together, it can make your own grief feel even deeper and loss can feel more apparent,” Dr. Pausic explained. “It is OK to acknowledge that getting through the holidays may be hard for you.” You aren’t the only one feeling this way. 
Whether you’re facing the loss of a loved one, family stress, a recent breakup, or not going home for the holidays, make space for all your emotions, give yourself grace, and don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself to feel happy. Dr. Pausic listed ways to help ease feelings of sadness/grief/loss:

Be around others who are supportive
Consider volunteering some of your time helping others
Feel what you are feeling. Grief is normal. Don’t force yourself to feel any differently.
Acknowledge the grief and loss that you are experiencing. Don’t tell yourself or others that you are fine if you aren’t.
Plan out self-care and coping strategies that work best for you. While it is important to define these for yourself, some examples may be taking a walk, spending time with a friend, trying a new activity, getting some sun, and exercise.
Reach out to your support network
Consider talking to a mental health professional
Be compassionate towards yourself 

10 Genius Health Hacks To Keep You Thriving Through the Holidays More

Watch any Hallmark Christmas movie and you’ll see a winter wonderland filled with family and friends, baking cookies, holiday shopping, and a lot of celebration. While I’m fully on board with festive movie marathons and indulging in the traditions that come with the holiday season, there is one part of it that peaks my anxiety: holiday parties. 
Between the office holiday party, annual family get-together, Friendsmas potluck, and white elephant exchange, it can feel like every weekend is committed to a social gathering. As an introvert with social anxiety, it’s hard to keep up with the constant holiday celebrations, but I’ve learned to prepare for such events in a way that I can enjoy the night and check my anxiety at the door. Ahead, the tips I keep in my back pocket to help me get through holiday parties with ease.

1. Meditate
Social anxiety doesn’t just occur at social events. It usually arrives well before the party has even begun, which is why it’s important to set yourself up for success ahead of time. My getting-ready routine not only involves a good playlist and make-up tutorial, but also setting aside some time to meditate before heading out. Meditation is already a part of my daily routine, but on a night when I’m attending a big event that I know will trigger my anxiety, I’ll add a 10-20 minute guided meditation sesh (through either the Unplug or Superhuman app) beforehand to help calm my nerves and get me in the right headspace. Just by prioritizing meditation, I can walk out the door feeling ready to socialize with confidence. 

2. Practice an affirmation
Affirmations often go hand-in-hand with meditation practices, but I find they’re also particularly helpful on their own to repeat to yourself during situations that may cause anxiety. The benefits come from repeating the word or phrase over and over again, which creates a focal point to align yourself in the present moment. You can create your own affirmations specific to the situations that cause you social anxiety or you can try some more general sayings, like “I am a friendly person,” “I am confident,” “I enjoy meeting new people,” and “I am relaxed in social situations.” Practicing an affirmation before or during a social event can be a great aid in working through any social anxiety that may arise. 

3. Bring a friend
Experiencing any mental health struggles can be especially difficult during this season, but the good news is you don’t have to go it alone. Despite the common perception that we have to face our struggles around anxiety on our own, having friends by my side who understand my anxiety has made it much easier for me to navigate social events. If there’s a party I don’t feel comfortable going to alone, I bring a friend. If simply the idea of attending a social event solo causes anxiety, bring someone you trust and who can be your support system throughout the night as your plus one. You just might find yourself so wrapped up in the holiday spirit that you forget why you were even anxious about attending the event in the first place.

4. Have a plan
For me, the lead-up to any event is when my anxiety creeps up. My mind often races between thoughts like, “What if I have no one to talk to?” and “What if I get stuck seated next to someone I don’t know?” I obsess over what time to arrive, what to wear, who is attending, and what will happen at the event. It can become so overwhelming that oftentimes it feels easier to just not attend at all. But over the years, I’ve learned not to let my anxiety get in the way of having fun, because yes, holiday parties can be a lot of fun!  You just have to be mentally prepared with a game plan.
Anxiety takes over when you feel a lack of control, so for starters, I think of every social anxiety-inducing situation that could happen at the party and come up with a plan. One might be standing alone and not feeling comfortable joining a conversation. In that case, make your way to a space you feel comfortable in and that will make it easier for you to socialize, like the bar/food area or even the bathroom (a lot of people love to socialize in restrooms of restaurants, bars, etc.). You can even have some questions in the back of your mind to ask people if you feel stuck, such as “What are your plans for the holidays?” 

5. Congratulate yourself
Living with social anxiety can feel like an ongoing battle. Sometimes you don’t know when or how it will arise. So when you do have to face it, whether at a holiday party or a work dinner, it’s important to remember that just leaving the house is a win. Congratulate yourself for putting on that LBD and spending a couple of hours in a social situation that may make you want to run home and crawl into bed. Try making a list of all the little wins you had that evening, and remember them the next time you are attending a social event. We often forget to stop and take note of what we’ve accomplished, which includes surviving social anxiety during the holiday season.

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