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    New Year’s Sucks When You’re Plus-Size—Here’s How to Manage the Weight Loss Pressure

    Every New Year’s Eve on the dot, I grab a fresh new notebook and write some goals. And you might be surprised to know that even as a proud, plus-size woman who is in recovery for an eating disorder, without fail, “lose weight” always weasels its way onto the list. Somehow, I always manage to convince myself after years of trying and failing that “this year will be the year!” And almost always, it doesn’t start with me creating a workout plan or trying to become healthier; I retreat to negative emotions and behaviors that mimic disordered eating patterns I thought I’d left in the past.
    But why do I make this lofty goal every single year? Because we’re told it’s the #1 goal to make, especially if you’re overweight (which, might I add, is so subjective and means very little about someone’s overall health). Every year, we see commercials, ads, magazines, articles, and more about the best ways to lose weight, how to drop the pounds (usually with some form of “finally!” or “once and for all!”), and I expect in 2020, how to lose all the weight you gained in quarantine. And as a plus-size person, it’s damn exhausting. 

    We’re inundated with reasons why looking like us is a problem
    It’s one thing to make a goal to get healthier. I think it’s a goal most of us should have every year. We could all stand to drink a little more water, try therapy, find a new vegetable you love, and hit a fitness goal or milestone. But as a plus-size person, seeing hundreds of people on social media, in ads, and more make it their #1 goal for the year to lose 10, 15, 20 pounds just makes us feel like our bodies are wrong.
    Of course, it’s optimal to want to feel and look your best; and for many people, losing weight helps them do that. I don’t want to take that away. But it’s always rooted in fatphobia. People are horrified that they’ve gained weight because being anything but thin is the worst thing there is. This time of the year, it feels like I’m being thrown reason after reason why my body isn’t what people want to look at. 

    This time of the year, it feels like I’m being thrown reason after reason why my body isn’t what people want to look at. 

    Not making a weight loss goal is often seen as “brave”
    But then, we have the people who want to call us out when we don’t make a weight loss goal. When I say that my #1 goal of the year is to love myself, regardless of my size or how I look, people respond as if sharing my authentic self is courageous and brave, when I don’t have a choice. Why are we brave for simply choosing to not give into the pressures of diet culture? Why is it brave to not have the mental capacity to try keto or paleo or whatever random diet being shoved down our throats in that blip in time? I’m not brave for choosing to love myself instead of promote the thin ideal, and to say so makes the point that wanting to lose weight should just be the norm, when in fact we should be actively moving away from that ideal.

    My body constantly looks like a before picture
    We’ve probably all seen the memes about “expectations and reality” on Instagram, sharing how posing can make your body look different. I appreciate and love the message that all bodies are beautiful, and I think it’s important to see that even people you think are the most beautiful and thin have insecurities. But as a fat person, I don’t have the option to pose in a way that makes it look like I don’t have rolls or so you can’t see my double chin—my natural body looks like the before picture for some of these memes. The body positivity movement was created by fat people, for fat people, and it’s frustrating to see these posts that are still entirely rooted in diet culture and white thin privilege be spouted as “loving oneself.” It’s crushing to constantly see a body that looks like mine be torn apart or told that it’s wrong; that having love handles is undesirable, that the sheer nature of becoming thinner will make you a happier person, when my body looks just like all of these pictures we’re supposed to be disgusted by. 
    Like I said, I want people to be healthy and happy, and I cannot deny that for some, losing weight can be a healthy process that makes them feel better about themselves physically and mentally. If losing weight is something you can do in a healthy way, I’m so into it. And having before pictures to recognize your progress might be a good tool for you to use. But watch how you talk about yourself in them. You were beautiful before; there was nothing aesthetically wrong with your body before. 

    When people we already deem as thin are told to lose weight, it sets the ideal that even thin bodies aren’t good enough
    Since I was young, I’ve had a hard time discerning how someone who’s already thin could be insecure. My weight has been a topic of anxiety my whole life; how could one possibly feel bad about themself if they already have everything I’ve ever wanted? But when it’s a goal for everyone to lose weight, what’s the ideal? If thin bodies aren’t good enough, what does that make mine? It feels like I’m chasing after something I can’t even achieve because even once you achieve it, you’re expected to do more, be more. 

    So, how can you deal? 
    There’s no way for us to get around New Year’s resolutions, but there are ways to handle the season without feeling like the punchline all the time.

    Set boundaries with loved ones

    If you have loved ones who make comments about weight often, engage in assertive communication about how it affects you. There’s nothing worse than working on something within yourself all to have to deal with the people around you not understanding it. Set boundaries for the communication you have with each other, whether it’s talking about meals, health goals, how much or how little you’re eating, how much activity you’re engaging in, and more. 

    Set intentions

    When you feel the weight loss pressure come along as you’re working on being healthier, it’s important to set really clear intentions for yourself. What do you truly want to accomplish? “Get healthier” might feel like an easy goal, but it’s easy to get jumbled. Make this goal tangible, like do 10 pull-ups or eat more protein three times a week for a month. 

    Address all-or-nothing thinking

    When you feel yourself leaning into the mindset that someone smaller than you wanting to lose weight has a reflection of your own self-worth, it’s time to reassess your focus. Is there fact in what you’re thinking, or are you creating this narrative in your head because you’re self-conscious? Therapy is a great tool to learn coping mechanisms to help with this type of thinking, or I love journaling. More

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    Our Favorite Pieces of 2020 That We’ll Still Be Wearing Next Year

    In 2020, our clothes didn’t get much use. I can confidently say that I touched roughly 15 percent of my wardrobe this year, and that might even be generous. Have I bought new things? Yes. Do I regret it? Well, sort of.Despite the fresh hell that was this year, trends still existed as they would in any other year, and we added some new pieces to our wardrobe that only our pets and the dust bunnies under our couch saw. But the good news? Most of them aren’t going away next year, and we can hold out hope that one day, fellow train passengers will see us in them on our way to the office.
    These are our absolute favorite pieces we’ve worn in 2020, all of which we’re planning on wearing throughout the entirety of 2021. Will anyone else see us in them? Only time will tell, but that doesn’t mean we love them any less.

    1. Our loungewear

    Source: @caitlynwarakomski

    2020 was nothing if not the year of loungewear; we learned that it doesn’t equate to feeling frumpy, and since it turned into our full-time wear, we made it as chic as possible. For reasons beyond quarantine, our matching sets and elevated loungewear will continue into 2021 and beyond. These editor-favorite pieces are the ones we can’t wait to get more use out of.

     

    2. Teddy coats

    Source: @crystalinmarie

    Teddy coats are the gift that keep on giving year after year: they’re cozy, cute as all hell, and never really go out of style. They’re the coat that we can count on both for warmth and to make us look like a cousin of Cruella de Vil, and what more could we possible ask for?

     

    3. Faux-leather pants

    Source: @simplytandya

    Since last January, faux leather has creeped into everything from our pants to our shirts. It’s a far cry from the pleather of the past; now, faux leather is as close as it could be to the real thing, which makes it a welcome part of our wardrobes. Once we’re out and about again, we’ll be wearing our faux-leather pants as much as our jeans.

     

    4. Shackets

    Source: Charlotte Bridgeman | @charlottebridgeman

    The shirt jacket, aptly shortened to just “shacket” this year, is about as versatile as it can get. We wore them as our outerwear in fall over T-shirts, and now that it’s chillier out, are throwing them on top of our chunkier sweaters. With a million different fabrics, colors, and prints to choose from, the shacket is our new denim jacket.

     

    5. Long, straight denim

    Source: @kateogata

    Longer lengths of denim made its way to graze the tops of our feet this year, and come 2021 when we’re wearing jeans again, they’ll be the ones we choose. Something about them feel more effortless and just a little bit cooler.

     

    6. Chunky boots

    Source: @theyusufs

    Something we actually did get wear out of this year? Chunky combat boots. If you’re anywhere that experiences winter, they’re about as practical as a trend can get, and we’re as likely to trudge to the grocery store in them as we are to wear them out to dinner.

     

    7. Puffer coats

    Source: @twentysomethingplus

    This year, when all we were wearing were various forms of sweats, we learned the value of a good puffer coat; they kept us warm and can be bought in a color or pattern fun enough to disguise the fact that we’re wearing a groufit underneath.

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    A Ranking of Our Editors’ Favorite Glossier Products

    Everyone has a brand they’re incredibly loyal to. For us, it’s Glossier. Their products are innovative, budget-friendly, and high-quality to boot. Between our editors, we’ve tried a mountain of their products from skincare to makeup to body care. Heck, we’re even fond of their GlossiWEAR clothing. So, what do we think about all the products we’ve tried? We sat down to rank our Glossier purchases, of course.Ranking your beauty products is honestly an impossible task. How am I supposed to say if this cleanser is better than this mascara which is better than a lip gloss? It’s just apples to oranges, people. But we can tell you exactly what’s worth your money and what you should remove from your cart immediately. Note that beauty is really subjective, so while there were some products that were a favorite for one editor, another editor hated it. Based on our descriptions, you should be able to decide if a product will be your new best friend or not. Here’s what we’d recommend, what was so-so, and what we’d skip!
    This certainly doesn’t include every single product in Glossier’s inventory, so if something is missing, it just means we need to add it to one of our next orders! 

    Our Editors’ Absolute Favorites:

    6 shades available
    Cloud Paint

    Glossier makes a few of my favorite skincare and beauty items, but the Cloud Paint really impressed me. Usually, when I hear that everyone likes a product, I’m skeptical about the hype. However, the Haze Cloud Paint is now the only blush I use because it’s so natural and hydrating. The hype is valid.- Bianca Lambert, Contributing Editor
    Every editor who’s tried this ranked these at least top three, so you know there’s gotta be something to the hype!

    4 shades available
    Boy Brow

    This product was widely loved by the entirety of our team (almost everyone mentioned it as a top product!)—you can’t go wrong with this cult-favorite brow product.

    Futuredew

    I’ve only tried FutureDew (I need to try out more Glossier products ASAP)! However, I love to use FutureDew as a makeup primer for an all-day glow. It’s the perfect extra touch to make my skin glowy and give me a great base for makeup. I also wear it on no-makeup days if I just want a little extra something! I love that it’s not too heavy or sticky.- Jessica Welsh, Editorial Assistant

    8 flavors available
    Balm Dotcom

    As someone with consistently dry lips, a love for all things in chic packaging, and the unfortunate habit of losing things often, you’d think I would not be a prime candidate for fancy lip balm. Well, you’d think wrong! I absolutely love balm dot com and carry them around with me everywhere I go (which, these days, is really just back and forth between my bed and my desk). It’s SUPER hydrating, the tubes are cute as heck, and the flavors/tints are light but noticeable. I’m a lifelong fan.- Abigail Yonker, Social Media Editor
    Basically our entire team raves about this lip balm. Bianca said she loves to use it on her cuticles and elbows too!

    You Perfume

    This is, by far, my favorite scent of all-time, and it’s around half the price of other really popular perfumes. It does really make you smell like yourself but better, and it’s the only perfume I’ve ever gone through multiple bottles of.
    – Madeline Galassi, Associate Editor
    Kelly and Beth also raved about this perfume! The scent is so distinguishable in the best way, and the price is really competitive for a high-end perfume.

    6 colors available
    Generation G Lipstick

    OK—so I’ve definitely heard mixed reviews on this one, as with the older packaging, people didn’t love how it was quite flimsy and how the formula turned out. I can only speak for the newer packaging version of these when I say that I freaking love this product. For a bit of background, I have always had a timid relationship with lip colors, and don’t like the look that most lipsticks and tinted balms I’ve tried give off. I wanted a buildable, sheer formula with a soft matte finish that faded evenly and subtly as the day went on, and for that reason, Gen G is perfect. Bonus: the lychee rose scent is fab, and none of the colors I’ve worn have come off on a mask so far!- Shriya Khanna, Editorial Intern
    Beth loves these too for a natural lip look!

    12 shades available
    Stretch Concealer

    I’ve struggled with acne for half my life—but now that my derm and I have finally gotten it under control, I’m feeling more prepared to ditch heavy makeup and go for lighter coverage. I first used the stretch concealer while my skin was at some of its worst—so you can rest assured that it does provide hydrating (read: non-cakey) coverage for breakouts and scarring—but when used to brighten up dark circles, it really shines. It’s light, breathable, and looks very natural.- Abigail Yonker, Social Media Editor

    3 shades available
    Haloscope Highlighter

    I’ve been using Haloscope for years! I tend to go for a more natural makeup look for day-to-day, and this highlighter gives the exact look that I want. I’m obsessed with the warm, dewy glow that it gives me. I’m no makeup guru, so I also appreciate how easy it is to use. I just slide it on the top of my cheekbones and blend it in with my finger. It’s also a great product for the summer when it’s hot and I don’t want a lot of heavy products on my face!- Keely Geist, The Everymom Social Media Editor

    Pro Tip Liquid Eyeliner

    A good, solid black eyeliner is without a doubt my #1 makeup must-haves (especially when all you can see is my eye makeup these days!). A liquid liner has to have three attributes for me to deem it worthy of repurchasing: it has to be an easy-to-use pen (versus the brush-and-dip-type deal); it should dry fast and be smudge-proof; it should be free of any strange fragrance (because trust me, I’ve met my fair share of smelly liners that just end up irritating my eyes). This baby passed the test with flying colors.- Shriya Khanna, Editorial Intern

    Lash Slick Mascara

    This is hands down my favorite everyday mascara! I always buy a new one before I finish my current one so I never run out. There are a few things I never leave the house without on my face, and this is definitely one of them. I love how naturally long it makes my lashes look without getting all clumpy and gross. I’ve even had people ask if I had on extensions while wearing Lask Slick, so my suggestion to you is to save yourself a lot of money and try this instead.- Keely Geist, The Everymom Social Media Editor
    Josie also loves this mascara for lengthening her lashes to the extreme—this picture! is enough explanation! She says it’s the only mascara she owns.

    3 shades available
    Lip Gloss

    Lipgloss is one of my favorite makeup products, especially now that no one but me ever really sees my lips. I have both the clear gloss and the cherry red, and I love them both the same. They’re really hydrating and comfortable to wear all day long with whatever look I create, whether it’s a smokey eye or no makeup.- Beth Gillette, Associate Editor
    However, Shriya said she thought it was a little too sticky, so if you’re sensitive to lip gloss formulas, this might be a skip for you.

    6 shades available
    Lidstar Glistening Eye Glow

    My makeup vice of choice has always been lipstick and I usually skip the big palettes of eyeshadows due to inevitably only using a single shade. But I fell hook, line, and sinker for the simplicity of Lidstar and the slick, matte-yet-gloss consistency.
    I love that it’s foolproof to use (no need to mess with your crease and multiple shades) and you can just swipe, tap, and go. I have the shades Cub and Moon, which are both are perfect for that slightest bit of shimmer. Moon is by far my favorite—it’s so barely there it’s almost just a reflection. As if you’re dancing on a patio with a handsome stranger, you close your eyes for the barest moment, the moonlight kissing your face. And they think, “Wow, she is resplendent.” And you open your eyes, look to the camera, wink and say, “Thank you, Lidstar!” This fantasy brought to you by Lidstar.- Kelly Etz, Online Course Director and Senior Graphic Designer

    The So-Sos:

    14 shades available
    Colorslide Technogel Eyeliner Pencil

    I snagged the mustard shade of this liner the day Glossier released their “Play” makeup line, and it’s been a favorite liner of mine ever since. It’s really smooth and glides on with ease, and I absolutely love the color options. I don’t usually pay this much for an eye pencil (these from NYX are so good and SO cheap!), but these come in so many unique shades I’ve never seen anywhere else. They’re also really pigmented, so I use mine for fun winged liner, blended as a shadow on the lid, on the lower lashline, or for a pop of color in the inner corner. Writing this right now is reminding me that I need to order more shades ASAP! This gorgeous burgundy is my fall dream.- Beth Gillette, Associate Editor

    Body Hero Oil Body Wash

    Back when we still went to weddings, I was attending one with our very own Editorial Director, Allyson. I remember arriving, hugging her, then immediately accusing her of being a witch because her skin was SO SOFT. When she attributed it to Glossier’s Body Hero products, I bought them the literal next day because I don’t waste time. I like both of the products just fine; I think the oil wash had a nice lather in the shower and the Daily Perfecting Cream blended in to my skin pretty well. However that was the first and last time I bought these products because THE SCENT.
    What to say about this smell? It felt like living inside a bottle of Tom Ford’s Neroli Portofino without all the interest and decadence. Truly just a straight hit of neroli that was so overpowering at one point I had to open the shower curtain to try and get a cross breeze going. Scents are incredibly personal (I’m a huge fan of the polarizing Ouai shampoo smell and I love a good hint of gasoline) so I’d recommend getting a sample of these before committing because you might love it. But if you’re not into fragrance or strong smells, steer clear, my friends. Just a hot tip from me to you.- Kelly Etz, Online Course Director and Senior Graphic Designer

    3 shades available
    Brow Flick Liquid Eyebrow Pen

    So, here it is: I really do love this product, but the shade range is absolute garbage. I got the lightest shade because I was worried that the brown would be too dark on my eyebrows. Lo and behold: the “blonde” shade is way too light that it barely looks like anything on my skin. But I absolutely love the result when I can build the color up. It’s the most natural-looking brow ever, as if I have real hairs in all the sparse places. I would rate this so much higher if the shades were better.- Beth Gillette, Associate Editor

    Priming Moisturizer

    On my first impression of this stuff years ago, I loved how rich and creamy this priming moisturizer was! It served as a light, moisturizing base for makeup, but once it ran out, I again opted for more affordable brands (like the CeraVe Daily Moisturizing Lotion and The Ordinary Natural Moisturizing Factors + HA which have been saviors for my super dry skin).- Ashley Selleke, Editorial Assistant
    I’ve tried the Priming Moisturizer Rich as well, and would say it is so-so. I much-preferred the consistency of the original Priming Moisturizer because it was lightweight, whereas the Rich formula didn’t make me feel any more hydrated, just heavier on the skin.- Beth Gillette, Associate Editor

    4 shades available
    Niteshine Highlighter

    If you’re between Glossier’s two highlighters, I’d go with Haloscope instead unless you really love a metallic highlight. This one is pretty, but it does dry down to a more matte finish, which is typically the opposite of what I’m going for with my highlighter. I already spent money on it, so to use it up I like to put it underneath my foundation or I’ll use a clear face gloss on top (like Haloscope in Quartz) to make it dewier. This product isn’t bad, and maybe you’ll absolutely fall in love with it if you have really oily skin, but it definitely wasn’t for me.- Beth Gillette, Associate Editor

    Skips:

    Super Glow Vitamin C Serum

    This Vitamin C serum was the first serum I ever purchased so I’m quite nostalgic about it. I had heard that vitamin C serum was good for anti-aging and improving the skin’s radiance so it wasn’t a difficult choice when I decided to give it a go! The serum worked in helping to brighten my complexion and added some hydration to my face, but I simply didn’t replace it because I started using The Ordinary Vitamin C Suspension which boasted a better price.- Ashley Selleke, Editorial Assistant

    Solution Exfoliating Skin Perfector

    I got this right when it came out and had such high hopes. I had scoured Reddit and YouTube, seeing basically all positive reviews. So when I used up a whole bottle and noticed not a single difference in my skin, I was pretty disappointed. It didn’t hurt my skin at all, and I’m sure it was doing some micro-effects I couldn’t notice, but I experienced zero physical differences, which made the $24 price tag just not worth it to me.- Beth Gillette, Associate Editor

    Bubblewrap Eye + Lip Cream

    Back in January when I was visiting London, they just happened to have the biggest, most grandiose Glossier pop-up set up in the heart of Covent Garden. I didn’t need anything, per se, but I was feeling festive and felt compelled to purchase something that I could qualify as “practical enough.” With it being the coldest month of the year and my lips looking like I had recently risen from the dead, I asked about the best products to hydrate lips and I was recommended Bubblewrap, which doubles both as eye and lip cream. I only utilized it on my lips a few times during that trip, and instead of the “slightly soft tingle” I was promised, it felt more like I had badly sunburned my entire mouth, with a weird chalky essence to top it off. Sadly, I had to plod back into fancy London Glossier to return this.- Shriya Khanna, Editorial Intern More

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    Our Favorite Things We Splurged on This Year

    Deciding when to take the plunge on a splurge is hard; it’s a lengthy process that takes some evaluating, strategizing, and a whole lot of review-reading.But when the day comes that you can wait for the UPS truck to come drop off your much-debated purchase and you finally have it in your hands, sometimes, you automatically know it was worth it—and when it was, you want to shout it from the rooftops.
    Our team has a wide variety of tastes and priorities in what we spend our money on, but this year, these were the very best things we splurged on; the ones we’d buy again in a heartbeat. 2020 didn’t bring us much, but it did bring us these stellar shopping choices.

    JENNI KAYNE
    Cashmere Cocoon Cardigan

    I fell in love with all things Jenni Kayne well over a year ago but just could not justify pulling the trigger on the high price point. When I found myself 7 months pregnant, in a global pandemic on my birthday this year, I finally splurged and invested in the Cocoon Cardigan for myself. It was the best clothing investment I have ever made and if I could throw out all of my other sweaters and only wear this forever I would. I have worn it multiple times per week since it arrived and it is the softest, oversized, and flattering staple in my closet. It looks adorable over jeans, skirts, dresses, and even joggers! My cost per wear at this point is significantly less than my $100 sweaters and they often offer discount codes of 15-20% off if you sign up for email or get their catalog in the mail. I give this purchase 5 out of 5 stars!

     

    N1 NANO

    I had my eye on this bag for over a year, and after hitting a few of my personal goals this year, I decided to take the plunge. Polène has been around for a minute now, but while I see their bags on Instagram a lot, I’ve never seen another person have one in real life. I love that it has a unique structure and design and could be recognizable to some, but that it doesn’t have any obvious branding on it. It is so, so beautifully made, comes with a real luxury experience (their packaging is beautiful), and is in a price range that is well below designer bags (I didn’t feel sick about the price, but it was also a huge treat to buy it!). The next bag I buy will inevitably be another one of their bags—I couldn’t be happier I took the plunge on this.

    PAT McGRATH LABS
    Mothership V Eyeshadow Palette – Bronze Seduction

    At the beginning of 2020, I swore to myself that I’d finally splurge on this palette when it went on sale, and when my bank account and a 25 percent off code aligned, I pulled the trigger on the most expensive makeup item in my collection … and I could not be happier about it. Pat McGrath is arguably the most renowned makeup artist in the world right now, and you can tell through her formula. These eyeshadows blend like an absolute dream—I barely even have to do any work. Plus, this includes four of her “special shades”: ultra-glittery, shimmery shades that are like nothing else on the market. At $125, this guy is a bit much, but if you find it on a sale, snag immediately.

    BreatheSmart 45i True HEPA Air Purifier

    If this year has taught me anything, it’s definitely taught me to be more mindful of my overall quality of life, including the air I breathe while spending more time at home. I put more effort into learning about air purifiers the past few months, especially after purchasing a new home, and decided to give the Alen BreatheSmart True HEPA Air Purifier a try. This air purifier cleans the air of harmful particles throughout the day while detecting when the home’s air quality changes with its LED smart sensor that changes colors depending on the quality. It works quietly in the middle of my home killing mold and bacteria and getting rid of unwanted odors (especially that outside puppy smell!). This a great purchase for overall better air quality, especially during cold and flu season.

     

    V7 Trigger Cordfree Handheld Vacuum

    This was my first impulse quarantine purchase and it’s one that I’ll never, ever regret. At the time, I already had a pretty decent vacuum, but pulling it out of the closet and zig zagging around with a cord as a tether to pick up a small mess was the bane of my existence. So when I found out that Dyson had a handheld, cordless vacuum that I’d be able to quickly grab to address spills and cat hair galore, I lost my marbles and added it to my cart at an alarming rate. I reach for this at least once a day and honestly, I never knew that vacuuming could be so fun. So much so that I asked for the Dyson V8 cordless vacuum for Christmas.

    Nespresso Vertuo
    Coffee and Espresso Machine Bundle

    I never thought I’d be a person to enjoy at-home coffee but alas, this Nespresso machine totally changed the game for me. Making my vanilla oat milk latte has become my favorite part of the day. This bundle came with a frother which has allowed me to create some super frothy, satisfying coffee pours! With five dollar lattes being a thing of the past, this splurge ultimately saved me so much money.

     

    Roomba 614 Robot Vacuum

    Not only my favorite splurge item this year, but perhaps my favorite splurge item ever, the Roomba is like family to me at this point. My floor has never looked cleaner and I haven’t had to put in any effort to get it there, thanks to this nifty floor vacuum that sucks up all crumbs, dust, and dog hair. I have it automatically set to do a full-apartment sweep every night around 8 p.m. (so it’s typically after I’ve cooked dinner to get all those crumbs) to fall asleep with a clean home, but I also love starting Elsa up (yes, I did name my vacuum, and yes, the name is Elsa) when I’m doing an apartment deep clean whether it’s for weekly cleaning or before company comes over (pre-pandemic, of course). It’s like we’re in this together! My home is so much cleaner than ever before, without any energy or time from me. Thank you, Elsa!

    Barefoot Dreams
    Cozy-Chic Heathered Throw Blanket

    In 2019, I would’ve never believed a throw blanket would be one of my splurge items of the year (I would’ve much rather saved my money for facials and shoes). But 2020 came in hot and I felt a strong feeling like I needed to pull the trigger on a Barefoot Dreams blanket, which I had lusted over for years. When it arrived and I finally felt it, I was immediately mad at myself for not pulling the trigger sooner. I’ll explain it like this: it is cozy in a way you did not even know cozy could be. I have at least five other throws in my apartment (most of which I would have deemed “soft” before I felt the heavenly fabric that is Barefoot Dreams), but have not touched any of them since getting this blanket because nothing can compare. It is draped around my legs while I work everyday and my favorite item to snuggle up with during a Netflix binge (yes, even more so than my boyfriend). Trust me, you will never regret purchasing this throw blanket, but you’ll probably regret not getting it sooner.

     

    Simple Suede Tote

    This is not the EXACT tote I got (mine is a deep green leopard print, which sounds weirder than it is—but that colorway is no longer available), but it’s the same style and material. I first saw it, the tote of my dreams, at the Nordstrom sale, and I was OBSESSED (I scoured the website practically hourly, since it kept going in and out of stock). Once I finally ordered it and received it in the mail, I’ve never looked back. Not only does it look chic and just different enough from other totes out there, but it’s also incredibly high quality. It’s one of the most grown-up purchases I’ve ever made, and I don’t regret it for a second. It holds a ton, and I get compliments on it allll the time!

     

    Crate & Barrel
    Edge Black Arch Wall Mirror

    I’d been wanting a big statement mirror for years and I knew it was going to be a splurge item. I hesitated and wished over this particular one—that shape!—for what feels like ages and finally bought it earlier this year. And drumroll please because… I ADORE IT. It is incredibly heavy and feels like such a quality piece, definitely lives up to the price. It’s one of the most complimented and asked about items in my apartment and when I moved earlier this year to a new space, it fit seamlessly in. I know I’ll have it for many more apartments and homes to come and I love that it will move and grow with me.

    Apple Watch SE

    I bought myself an Apple Watch this year and I honestly felt kind of embarrassed by it because I’m not particularly sporty and am more of an “indoor” gal. But I actually really love the watch, I think it’s helped me move so much more than I would otherwise, especially during this year where my only commute is from my bed to the couch. My sister-in-law recently bought one as well and we’ve been sharing our activity data and it’s helped keep me motivated and connected to her and to a feeling of wanting to be healthier and more active. I’m definitely still not a sporty person or a runner by any means, but even just the reminders to stand up throughout the day help me feel more accomplished. It’s the little things these days.

    Nespresso Vertuo
    Coffee and Espresso Machine Bundle

    OK, I know this is the second time this item is appearing on this list, but maybe that just goes to show how absolutely amazing this is. I actually have the version with rose gold accents (which really sold me even more), but that is currently out of stock everywhere. This might sound crazy, but my Nespresso has been a shining light of 2020. I love to use espresso pods and oat milk in the frother to make iced lattes at home, so not only am I saving money, they are DELICIOUS. I will never accept another at-home coffee maker again.

    Abercrombie & Fitch
    Ultra Tech Parka

    I’ve had the same black Michael Kors parka (I’m sure you know the one) since my freshman year of college, and while it’s served me well, it was time for an upgrade. Honestly, I’ve been searching the internet since last winter for a new one that I loved, but none were really standing out to me. A couple of weeks ago, however (during a sale of course), I saw this one from Abercrombie and fell in love with the cream color. I love that it’s different but still neutral and I’m obsessed with the matching fur on the hood. When it arrived, it did not disappoint! It is so cozy and warm, and I know it will serve me well in the cold that is still to come this winter. And FYI, I did have to exchange it for one size up from my typical size in order for it to be comfortable enough to wear sweaters with it!

    SET ACTIVE
    Sculptflex Leggings and Box Cut Bra

    Believe it or not, before I purchased these leggings – I had yet to find my favorite black pair and when I say these are life changing and not just a “trend” – I’m being serious. They suck you in and are so smooth and tight, just the way I like it. It’s quite pricey but worth the price – 1 million percent. Also, if you’re feeling like treating yourself a tad bit more, add the box bra and you have an entire fit and you’re ready to get out the door.

    The North Face
    Gotham 550 Fill Power Down Hooded Parka

    A really good, warm winter coat is definitely an investment piece, and one I normally hang on to for the better part of a decade. This year though, I left mine in Chicago, where it is currently sitting in storage, when I came home for the pandemic. I’m not sure when exactly I’ll go back and get it so, in the meantime, I purchased another super warm, durable coat to get me through the impending cold New England winter.

    AWE Inspired
    Harriet Tubman Coin Necklace

    After seeing stacked gold jewelry everywhere this year, I decided I wanted in. I wanted to make sure I was purchasing a piece that would last and was meaningful, so I decided on this coin necklace. I love that it represents strength, and 100 percent of proceeds from each sale—along with a matching donation—are donated to the NAACP.

    Bike + Essentials

    After a year of talking about the Peloton, my husband and I decided to split one in February. We both have birthdays in the same week and agreed this was our Valentines/Birthday/Anniversary/Christmas present for the year. At first I was worried about it being a fad, but then the world shut down a week after it was delivered. It quickly became our saving grace through isolation. From 15 minute quick blasts that will leave you breathless (yes, really) to a 45 minute Backstreet Boys ride that is an instant boost of serotonin, you can always find a workout that works for you. Even with gyms in our area opening back up, we have no desire to abandon our bike. It was our best purchase of 2020, hands down. More

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    Headbands Are My Holiday Hairstyle Secret Weapon—Here’s How I Style Them

    Going natural is one of the best things I’ve ever done. My 4-type hair can shapeshift into many different styles while keeping its unique curl pattern. However, one style that I love to see on others but have been afraid to try is pulling my hair back into a sleek, middle-parted bun. I have seen the simple-but-classic style everywhere lately, and two of my beauty icons—Sade and Meghan Markle—wear the style so well, but their hair types are totally different from mine.

    Luckily, I’ve seen many ladies with coiler hair textures on YouTube and social media taking this style on, which inspired me to give the look a try myself. I am happy to report that I achieved the look with a couple of products I already had in my bathroom, and I even added a sparkly holiday hair accessory for good measure. Here’s how I achieve my new look!

    I start with my wash day 

    One thing I’ve learned about my hair over the last few years is that water is my curl’s best friend. Water not only hydrates my curls, but it gives me the ability to work with them without damage or excessive breakage. With that in mind, I start my journey to a slicked-back bun with—you guessed it—H2o. I wash, condition, and apply all of my products in the shower. In-shower product application is important for my hair because I have low-porosity hair, meaning my hair gets the most benefit from products when it’s soaking wet.
    After applying my leave-in conditioner, it’s time to apply the products to mold my springy, tightly-coiled curls into a bun. I start by hopping out of the shower for a few moments to part my hair down the middle and hop back in to apply my Aunt Jackie’s Grape Seed Frizz Patrol Setting Mousse. I love it because it doesn’t flake and has a firm hold without the crunch. I re-soak my hair with water and then apply three pumps of mousse to the front of my head, three pumps to the crown, and two pumps to my ends. Next, I use my Felicia Leatherwood Detangler Brush to smooth all of these products through my hair from root to tip. Once my cocktail of products is evenly distributed and my hair is detangled, I braid my hair length to the end to keep the most fragile (and dryness-prone) part of my hair protected. 

    I add a few more products post-shower for hold and shine

    Once I get out of the shower, I apply a few more pumps of mousse, followed by a palm-full of Creme of Nature’s edge control to keep my hair down without the crispy crunch that gel can leave behind. Lastly, I add Prose’s shimmer oil for shine and to lock in the moisture. For those with coiler hair textures, at least from my own experience, tying the hair down with a satin or silk scarf after molding it is crucial. Because my hair is soaking wet at this step, I sit under a bonnet dryer for about an hour. If you don’t have a bonnet or hooded dryer, you can always tie your hair down overnight to set it, but it may not be completely dry the following morning, so keep that in mind. 

    Once my hair is dry, I use a hair tie to secure my braided ponytail and add a couple of bobby pins to secure my braid into a bun. One thing I want to note: if you have coily hair, shrinkage is still going to be a thing even when setting and stretching your hair with minimal heat. So, don’t get discouraged. If you want a sleeker ponytail, blow your hair out first. But if you want a no-heat style, this is the way to go. 

    I felt a little self-conscious the first time I tried this style and my hair was set because my entire face was in full view with no curls or bangs to frame it. But once I added my headband, I felt like I was four again, when headbands and anything sparkly instantly made me feel like I was walking into one of my beloved Disney movies, and I felt like my face had some framing. I want to note that my Lele Sadoughi headband is an investment piece. I love that it’s got bling, it’s gold (which is my favorite color and can go with almost anything), it’s well-made, and best of all, it’s comfortable. No headband headaches over here. With that in mind, I want to share a few of my budget-friendly favorites that can bring on the holiday glam and cheer: 

     
    As a woman with 4-type hair, I have heard every negative thing you could imagine about my curls, from “Your hair isn’t professional” to “You can’t do that with your hair.” I love to prove the hair-shamers, colorists, and even myself wrong as I continue to shine a light on Black hair’s beauty and versatility. Black hair can do anything, no matter the texture, and my little holiday hairstyle further proves that point.  More

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    5 Cute Ways to Style Your Uggs This Winter

    Now I’m not saying I’m a trendsetter by any means, but mark my words: Uggs are taking the front seat in your wardrobe this year. The comfortable, cozy footwear option is finally getting the recognition it deserves. And as a self-proclaimed Ugg stan, it feels like my shining moment.A few years ago, I noticed a whole slew of cute Uggs hitting the shelves at trendy retailers, and then I saw a few people styling them for more than just the “leggings and sweatshirt” look for errands and how we wore them in high school. I bought them hoping to get in on a trend early, and finally in 2020, my time has come. 
    Upon reviewing Ugg outfit choices as of late (do not dare Pinterest “Uggs outfit”; you will regret the 2008 flashback), I saw a common thread: people think this footwear is only for running errands or wearing with your favorite black leggings. While this is essentially the best and most comfortable way to wear them, Uggs can be much more of a fashion statement than you think. When you style them up, you look less slob and more cool girl. If you splurged on them this year (or years past such as myself), here are a few ways I love wearing mine that look like a full-on moment rather than just my “morning after” ‘fit.
    Shop My Faves:

    Bailey Button II Boot

    These are next on my to-buy list because they’d be perfect to fold-over and wear with leggings!
    3 colors available

    1. I just hopped off my private jet to Lake Tahoe

    leggings / teddy jacket / teddy jacket (straight-size) / turtleneck / gold necklace
    For one, the monochrome of this look is *chef’s kiss*, but my #1 way to wear my Uggs is with anything cozy. Uggs are already the quintessential cozy item, so I up that with a few other pieces, like a teddy coat like this. This dresses up that typical “Uggs and leggings” pairing just a bit. I pulled my hair back with a clip because LOL why would I do my hair, and added a little necklace under the jacket for ~visual interest~ (AKA to distract that I was wearing a red bra under this white top like an absolute buffoon). 

    2. Just in case the paparazzi are lurking outside my building on my quarantine walk

    leggings / camel coat / graphic tee (small business) / beanie
    When I looked up celebrity Ugg outfits, I saw a lot like this (namely a very cute old pic of Gigi Hadid). A classic trench-style coat + graphic tee + leggings + Uggs. I even saw this look with the taller Uggs, which I’m going to be honest, I am even considering now. This is the perfect errand outfit when you don’t want to feel like you rolled out bed, but you’re still wearing the most comfortable, warm pieces. And apparently, it is oh, so very paparazzi-worthy. I feel weird without some color in my wardrobe, so a beanie was the perfect addition.

    3. The 2000s called: they want their look back

    sweater / blue sweater plus-size / straight-leg jeans / necklace (Black-owned brand) 
    If you’re not wearing your Uggs with straight-leg jeans, let me introduce you. A few tips: opt for a cropped cut to let your Uggs shine (especially if you have the Minis like me and not the Ultra Mini) without them getting jumbled up under fabric. Also, make sure they are true straight jeans, maybe even something with a slight flair (I have unnecessarily skinny ankles or something and every straight leg jean looks like a flair on me), so they just graze the top of the shoes. This look gives me total 2000s vibes, and I love every bit of it. I’m just a girl waiting for the cute boy from the rival school to notice me in the mall food court!

    4. Oooh, festive! 

    leather leggings / red turtleneck / red turtleneck plus-size / bag (similar—this is a sustainable version, is on sale, and is on my wishlist!) / hoop earrings (Black-owned brand)
    It’s all about juxtaposition, baby. I pair my leather leggings with Uggs more often than I wear them with cute shoes. I just love the cozy, casual feel they bring to an outfit that is usually too dressy for the occasion anyway. This is something I’d wear to go watch movies and drink wine with my quarantine crew—which is basically all I do. For good measure, I keep my hair and makeup polished but subdued. Here, I tucked my straightened hair under the turtleneck for ~vibes~. “I am just such a busy girl, I couldn’t BEAR to pull my hair out of here! Silly me!” 

    5. Blogger at the airport—or in 2020, blogger every day

    sweatpants (on sale!) / graphic tee option 1 (small business) / graphic sweatshirt / leather jacket / leather jacket plus-size / mug (my current favorite when I’m not sippin’ Starbs) 
    I am the worst Sagittarius ever and didn’t enter the airport consciously until I was 22 years old. However, I make up for all that lost time by going to absolutely unnecessary measures to pull off these classic “blogger at the airport” as often as I can. I love dressing up these loungewear pieces, like Uggs and sweats, with a dressier jacket, like leather. I won’t be heading to the airport for quite a while, but I can sure pretend!  More