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    I’m Getting Married in Six Months–Here’s How I’m Preparing My Body and Mind

    Planning a wedding can be stressful AF regardless of how large or small your big day may be. From multiple dress fittings to coordinating with vendors to organizing every detail down to napkin colors, you may feel like you barely have a moment to breathe. On top of that, you want to look and feel your best for your wedding day. I’m six months out, and I’ve begun to dial in on managing my stress, anxiety, and physical health so I can feel my best in six months, but also so I can actually enjoy the process now. Keep reading for what I’m doing to feel my best at my wedding and health tips you can try today.

    Start a daily meditation practice
    All eyes are on you on your wedding day, which can be nerve-wracking to say the least. Aside from my tried-and-true self-care activities like yoga, journaling, and spending time in nature, I’m turning to meditation most often to help ease my anxiety. Prioritizing a daily meditation practice now will help manage the stress of wedding planning, but building up your practice will help you feel centered before all the big moments, from engagement parties to the wedding day, and everything in between. I prefer guided meditations that help me envision how the day will go. Consider it a manifestation meditation, if you will. I also find it helpful to repeat affirmations such as, “I choose calm” or “Peace begins with me” whenever I am feeling high anxiety. You can actually manifest your wedding day turning out exactly how you envisioned it. 

    Delegate tasks (no, but actually!)
    I’d like to think that I’m a cool-and-collected bride (not the stereotypical “bridezilla”), so when I realized that making the most of the major decisions and checking off all the to-dos were starting to feel a little too overwhelming, I looked for ways to delegate tasks to my friends and family. It may seem obvious, but when it comes to planning your big day it can feel challenging to hand over responsibilities to other people–even your loved ones (Will they do it “right?” What if they mess up? Will it just create more work for me?).
    So how do you decide what tasks to outsource and what ones to keep for yourself? My unsolicited advice is to make a list of the tasks that are the most important to you to complete on your own, and be realistic when determining how much time you’d actually have to spend on them and the skills and resources you have available. For example, I really wanted to design and print my own invites, but I don’t own a printer (and wasn’t going to buy one), nor did I feel like I really had the time to spend hours designing. So I decided that was a task I could outsource to my friend who works in graphic design, and I still felt like the invitations came out personal, despite not being hand designed by me. Delegating tasks has made the biggest difference in my stress levels and having more time. 

    Consistently remind yourself of what’s important
    Whether you’ve had a Pinterest wedding board for years or you obsessively started scouring the internet for inspiration after your engagement, social media makes it very easy to fall into the comparison trap. When I find myself spiraling into thoughts of, “I have to do this” or “Everything needs to be perfect,” I take a step back and remind myself of what’s actually important and realistic for my wedding. At the end of the day, your wedding is about celebrating your relationship with your partner, not throwing an Insta-worthy party. Keeping what’s special between the two of you at the forefront of your decision making will ensure you have a day that you’ll cherish forever. 

    Make an exercise plan 
    I’m a big believer that you shouldn’t have to change your appearance for your wedding day (your partner already loves you for who you are). But I also believe that there is nothing wrong with wanting to look and feel your best on your big day, especially since you’ll be reliving it through photos for a lifetime. Consistency has always been an issue for me when it comes to working out, and having a big event (read: my wedding) to look forward to was just what I needed to make a plan and stick to it.
    My goal with exercise has always been to take care of my body and feel stronger and more confident. I prefer low-impact movement such as walking, biking, Pilates, and yoga. To hold myself accountable to a workout routine, I sit down each Sunday and look at my schedule for the week ahead. Much like making a to-do list, I write down what workouts I plan to do each day and what time of day I will do them (what can I say, I’m Virgo rising). I find that physically writing my workouts down and seeing them every day holds me more accountable than inputting them in Google calendar. The key for me is not holding myself to rigid standards, but rather embracing that life happens and knowing that some movement in my day is better than no movement at all. By scheduling workouts I enjoy, I know that I’m not only going to feel my best on my big day ,but also keep up my workout routine well beyond the wedding. 

    Upgrade your skincare regimen for optimal glow
    I have struggled with breakouts since I was a teenager, so skincare is a huge part of caring for myself and feeling my best. I’m working with my dermatologist and have found a treatment plan that works great for me: to keep my skin looking clear and bright leading up to the wedding, I’m making sure to incorporate skin-enhancing foods, such as healthy fats (found in avocados, nuts, and fish), vitamin C, and antioxidants. And while I love a glass of red wine, I find that drinking alcohol can make my skin look dull and dry the next day. So for now, I’m sticking to enjoying an occasional drink on the weekends, rather than having a drink with dinner on the weekdays. Instead, I reach for some of my other favorites such as kombucha and try to keep up with my daily hydration goals. 
    As for what I am using on my skin, I swear by this mask from Origins. I use it 1-2 times per week at night, and it always makes my skin look bright and firm the next day. I’m very prone to sunburn due to my fair complexion and a prescription retinoid I currently use, so I always wear SPF (this one is my go-to under makeup) because the last thing you want to worry about on your wedding day is a sun burn or hyperpigmentation.

    10 Things to Stop Doing to Get in the Best Shape of Your Life More

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    8 UAE-based places to order bespoke premium cakes from

    Lifestyle

    by Sarah Joseph
    3 hours ago

    We’re all tired of the same old off-the-rack cakes and want to make each celebration even more memorable.
    Finding a trusted baker who can make your dream cake a reality, might sometimes be too much to ask for. Be it a specific baby-shower-themed cake or multi-layered decadent sponges decorated with edible flowers, there are endless options of cake ateliers in the UAE that can seamlessly execute the job.
    Be it birthdays, weddings or personal milestones, no cake is too hard to create for these well-established patisseries and talented bakers. From design and flavour to tasting, each customer is taken through the journey to be certain of the outcome and celebrate their big day without an inch of doubt.
    To help you narrow down the process, Emirates Woman has curated the ultimate premium cake guide for bespoke offerings in the UAE.

    – For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
    Images: Supplied & Feature Image: Pexels @avonnestalling More

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    Inside Princess Iman of Jordan’s Royal wedding with Jameel Alexander Thermiotis

    Lifestyle

    by Sarah Joseph
    58 mins ago

    The first royal wedding of 2023 officially took place this weekend.
    Jordan’s Princess Iman bint Abdullah II wed Jameel Alexander Thermiotis at Beit Al-Urdon Palace in a lavish ceremony on March 12, 2023, where she was donned in a stunning Dior gown.
    All her family members including Crown Prince Hussein with his fiancée Rajwa Al Saif along with King Abdullah and Queen Rania were present at the wedding. Other dignitaries from the GCC were also part of the celebrations such as Sheikh Khaled bin Mohamed bin Zayed Al-Nahyan, who is chairman of the Abu Dhabi Executive Office, Entissar Amer, the current First Lady of Egypt and more.
    Princess Iman, 26, was ushered into the ceremony by her brother, Crown Prince Hussein with photos of them seen walking down the aisle.
    With over 150 guests seen attending the wedding, the live broadcast of the ceremony took place on Jordan TV, the country’s national television service.
    “Iman, I pray this next chapter in your life brings you as much joy, love, and laughter as you have brought us over the years. Congratulations to the bride and groom!” Queen Rania shared on Instagram.
    Swipe through the gallery to see the best photos from the wedding.

    Here’s to a lifetime of happiness for the newlyweds!
    – For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
    Images: Instagram @Queen Rania More

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    This luxe Abu Dhabi hotel is the ultimate celebratory wedding venue

    Lifestyle

    by Team Emirates Woman
    2 hours ago

    In PARTNERSHIP: Choosing a venue can be one of the most stressful yet crucial parts of the wedding planning process.
    To make your big day special, Grand Hyatt Abu Dhabi Hotel & Residences promises to throw a lavish ceremony to remember for a lifetime.
    While Dubai delivers some of the most romantic wedding venues, there is no reason why Abu Dhabi shouldn’t be on your list.
    So if you’re looking for a potential wedding venue, this property offers a myriad of reasons why you should tie the knot here.
    Location
    Just minutes away from the city’s most notable landmarks, celebrate in the heart of the city at Grand Hyatt Abu Dhabi Hotel & Residences. Nestled in the iconic West Corniche district, it is an idyllic destination to exchange vows and craft memories weaved with emotions, opulence and sophistication.
    Wedding venues

    With its perfect blend of unparalleled grandeur, elegance and charm, Grand Hyatt Abu Dhabi Hotel & Residences is the ultimate location for big celebrations beyond every expectation. Offering one of the largest and most elegant wedding venues in the capital, every couple can choose between a micro wedding for an intimate celebration or a full-on wedding festivity.
    ‘Al Bateen’ is a high-celling ballroom that allows you to customize your big day to your style and preferences and can comfortably host large weddings of up to 600 guests, making for an excellent pick for an eloquent large-scale celebration. The venue boasts a theatrical staircase that leads you from the private entrance to the beautifully designed pre-function area as you make your way toward your magical ever-after. The well-appointed bridal suite and the plush VIP lounge are thoughtfully designed keeping in mind the comfort and privacy of the bride and the groom, making it one of the largest in the city, adorned with luxurious decors.

    For a more intimate affair, there is the ‘Mouza’, a stunning event space with floor-to-ceiling glass windows, a sea-view private terrace and a dedicated pre-function area. The ‘Lum’a Terrace’ offers a space apt for receptions and ceremonies, and delivers breathtaking views of the palace.
    For traditional weddings, Grand Hyatt Abu Dhabi Hotel & Residences also provides a private ladies-only setting in an exclusive set-up that includes female chefs, security personnel and hostesses.
    Dedicated wedding planners
    To ensure a smooth sailing wedding prep you will get to work with an experienced team of event consultants to do all your ‘wedmins’ and ensure your wedding perfectly matches your vision. From an elevated guest experience down to the smallest of details, their years of expertise will allow you a stress-free wedding prep and bring together tradition, culture, and your personal style to create exciting and memorable moments for you and your guests.
    Exquisite catering
    Embark on an epicurean journey with bespoke menus carefully curated by the master chefs, a personalized service, and a customized wedding cake on the house – these culinary offerings add a meaningful touch to your big day.
    Luxurious guest rooms and facilities
    When all the dancing and festivities wind down, Grand Hyatt Abu Dhabi Hotel & Residences can host you and your guests throughout the wedding celebration. The property features luxurious rooms and spacious suites and residences providing the perfect space to relax and prepare for your big day. Its world-class amenities include an outdoor pool, spa and in-house salon – allowing the utmost convenience for the day of your dreams. Special stay rates are offered for guests as well as a complimentary first night at the Grand Suite followed by a lavish breakfast spread for the newly-wedded couple.
    – For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
    Images: Supplied More

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    The most luxurious wedding venues to tie the knot in Dubai

    Lifestyle

    by Sarah Joseph
    1 hour ago

    Wedding season in Dubai is already and here and this destination continues to remain at the helm of all marital celebrations.
    From beachfront destinations to ballrooms that exude elegance, the emirate is home to an array of venues that are beyond sophisticated.
    For immaculate attention to detail, each property creates a bespoke proposal as per the bride and groom’s requirements.
    So, for those currently looking for the perfect place for their wedding vows, we’ve gathered a list of all the sophisticate venues for a potential wedding.
    Four Seasons Resort, Jumeirah Beach

    Combining the city’s modernity and old-time charm, this expansive venue includes the grand Dana ballroom and a plush garden for any outdoor festivities. Whether you wish to exchange your vows on the sand or in the lush seaside garden, this hotel makes any dream a reality. No matter the size, this exquisite property welcomes every guest in style. With incredible backdrops and on-side wedding experts working with them at every step makes the entire process easier.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Mandarin Oriental

    With world-class service and impeccable catering standards, the property will ensure any event is truly unforgettable. From flowers to venue decorations, Mandarin Oriental has relationships with external suppliers to ensure each detail is taken care of. For the bride to feel special on her wedding day, the property offers a magnificent suite with showcases expansive views of the Arabian Sea featuring a make-up station, a private lift, for bridal parties, and a spacious living space.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    One & Only Royal Mirage, The Palm

    This exceptional romantic beachfront resort promises a one-of-a-kind celebration with gourmet menus, serene spa treatments, and a timeless backdrop to enjoy with up to 50 guests. From catering to Moorish-style gardens to beginning a memorable journey, this venue caters to every request. Surrounded by nature, this property caters to refined pre-wedding photoshoots with pictures to capture those happy moments.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Nikki Beach Resort & Spa

    Couples can exchange their vows at this resort with views looking over the magnificent Arabian Gulf. Whether a small or grand occasion, the property caters to each client with world-class food, beverages menu, spa, and beauty services combined with an unending list of live entertainment. From a beach villa with a private pool for an intimate gathering to spacious ballrooms, the resort provides an exclusive service to assist customers in planning their special day.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Jumeirah Zabeel Saray

    To ensure each wedding is different from the other, the team of in-house experts has a keen eye for an ethereal setting. From overlooking the azure waters of the Arabian Gulf to preparing a plethora of delicious canapes, every bride and groom is made to feel special Whether custom lanterns or a bespoke culinary request, the property will do its best to cater to every need.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Fairmont, The Palm

    When starting your life together, a wedding becomes an important decision in any couple’s life and the wedding planners at Fairmont bring each dream to life with bespoke celebrations. By bringing a wow factor to the venue, the Sea View Garden is ideal for an al fresco experience allowing couples to celebrate with around 500 guests. To ensure the guests’ taste is carefully considered, each chef will create a gourmet dining experience for a successful wedding for a stress-free experience.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Bulgari Resort

    With Italian luxury at its heart, this exclusive property exudes an unmatched love for luxury. This beautiful venue features a 360sq metre ballroom located in the Yacht Club overlooking romantic seaside views and a welcoming space with earthy tones. With a birch walkway and candles subtly lit across the walkway, the hotel provides seamless service to make every minute count. With bespoke packages for each guest, the space can be rented for both daytime and evening events.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Raffles, The Palm

    Mona Kattan and Hassan Elamin recently exchanged their vows at Raffles The Palm and celebrated one of their occasions with all their special guests prior to their wedding. Whether intimate ceremonies or lavish celebrations, each setup can be designed according to the guests’ needs. With its palatial structure and vibrancy in every corner, this property has a host of facilities to offer for guests including spa facilities and other fine-dining restaurants.
    For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
    Images: Supplied & Feature Image: Instagram @haileybieber  More

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    The most romantic wedding venues in Dubai

    Lifestyle

    by Sarah Joseph
    3 hours ago

    Wedding season in Dubai is fast approaching and the venue remains at the helm of all marital celebrations.
    From beachfront destinations to ballrooms that exude elegance, Dubai is home to an array of venues that are beyond sophisticated.
    For immaculate attention to detail, each property creates a bespoke proposal as per the bride and groom’s requirements.
    So, for those currently looking for the perfect place to tie the knot, we’ve gathered a list of all the luxe venues for a potential wedding venue.
    Four Seasons Resort, Jumeirah Beach

    Combining the city’s modernity and old-time charm, this expansive venue includes the grand Dana ballroom and a plush garden for any outdoor festivities. Whether you wish to exchange your vows on the sand or in the lush seaside garden, this hotel makes any dream a reality. No matter the size, this exquisite property welcomes every guest in style. With incredible backdrops and on-side wedding experts working with them at every step makes the entire process easier.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Mandarin Oriental

    With world-class service and impeccable catering standards, the property will ensure any event is truly unforgettable. From flowers to venue decorations, Mandarin Oriental has relationships with external suppliers to ensure each detail is taken care of. For the bride to feel special on her wedding day, the property offers a magnificent suite with showcases expansive views of the Arabian Sea featuring a make-up station, a private lift, for bridal parties, and a spacious living space.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    One & Only Royal Mirage, The Palm

    This exceptional romantic beachfront resort promises a one-of-a-kind celebration with gourmet menus, serene spa treatments, and a timeless backdrop to enjoy with up to 50 guests. From catering to Moorish-style gardens to beginning a memorable journey, this venue caters to every request. Surrounded by nature, this property caters to refined pre-wedding photoshoots with pictures to capture those happy moments.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Nikki Beach Resort & Spa

    Couples can exchange their vows at this resort with views looking over the magnificent Arabian Gulf. Whether a small or grand occasion, the property caters to each client with world-class food, beverages menu, spa, and beauty services combined with an unending list of live entertainment. From a beach villa with a private pool for an intimate gathering to spacious ballrooms, the resort provides an exclusive service to assist customers in planning their special day.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Jumeirah Zabeel Saray

    To ensure each wedding is different from the other, the team of in-house experts has a keen eye for an ethereal setting. From overlooking the azure waters of the Arabian Gulf to preparing a plethora of delicious canapes, every bride and groom is made to feel special Whether custom lanterns or a bespoke culinary request, the property will do its best to cater to every need.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Fairmont, The Palm

    When starting your life together, a wedding becomes an important decision in any couple’s life and the wedding planners at Fairmont bring each dream to life with bespoke celebrations. By bringing a wow factor to the venue, the Sea View Garden is ideal for an al fresco experience allowing couples to celebrate with around 500 guests. To ensure the guests’ taste is carefully considered, each chef will create a gourmet dining experience for a successful wedding for a stress-free experience.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Bulgari Resort

    With Italian luxury at its heart, this exclusive property exudes an unmatched love for luxury. This beautiful venue features a 360sq metre ballroom located in the Yacht Club overlooking romantic seaside views and a welcoming space with earthy tones. With a birch walkway and candles subtly lit across the walkway, the hotel provides seamless service to make every minute count. With bespoke packages for each guest, the space can be rented for both daytime and evening events.
    To find out about the packages visit here.
    Raffles, The Palm

    Mona Kattan and Hassan Elamin recently exchanged their vows at Raffles The Palm and celebrated one of their occasions with all their special guests prior to their wedding. Whether intimate ceremonies or lavish celebrations, each setup can be designed according to the guests’ needs. With its palatial structure and vibrancy in every corner, this property has a host of facilities to offer for guests including spa facilities and other fine-dining restaurants.
    For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
    Images: Supplied & Feature Image: Instagram @haileybieber  More

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    The #1 Conversation You Need to Have Before Getting Married

    It started as a normal morning enjoying a cup of coffee together before the craziness of the day began. “Coffee time,” as we call it, is our daily ritual of couple time where no phones are allowed, and we just talk. Most days it’s an enjoyable conversation, but on this particular morning, we veered into dangerous territory: money. Before I could try to change the subject, an inevitable question surfaced.“Exactly how much debt do you have?” he asked as my body began to tense.
    For the record, I don’t have a lot of debt, but I do have some. My partner, on the other hand, has none. I immediately felt uneasy and insecure. We made it through the conversation unscathed, but it got me thinking about couples and finances and why it’s so hard to talk about money. Studies show that money is one of the most widespread, difficult, and persistent issues within marriages. It’s no wonder a new practice of premarital financial counseling seems to be gaining popularity among engaged couples. 

    Why is it so hard for couples to talk about money? 
    When two people decide to do life together, it’s much more than a merging of households and families. As a licensed couple and family therapist Michelle Collins explained, couples are also joining their pasts and future dreams. “Along with those things, they are joining their different orientations towards money,” Collins said.
    Our family culture, values, and past experiences help determine our views and beliefs about money. “One’s relationship with money develops the language they use when communicating about, interacting with, and showing others how they treat money,” Collins said. “It is common for partners to have different languages about money and when trying to bridge the gap, couples find they don’t have all the tools to translate—and listen—clearly.”
    It comes down to a communication issue. Collins works with couples to examine their family tree and discuss how each individual’s parents’ life experiences and views toward money have impacted their own relationship with money. “This conversation allows partners to better understand how the other person has developed their money language and then find ways to translate so they can be successful managing their finances.”

    What is premarital financial counseling?
    Think of it like couples counseling meets financial counseling. An unbiased, trained professional will help translate your different money languages so you can navigate important financial decisions. “Premarital financial counseling involves the creation of a budget, and the discussion of long-term and short-term financial goals like saving for a home, or the parties’ thoughts about retirement,” Holly Davis, a family law attorney at Kirker Davis LLP, explained. 
    You will discuss everything from spending habits and work ethic to how you’ll handle potential difficult financial situations. “These are so important to discuss because if you are engaged to a big spender, and you are a penny pincher, you have the opportunity to work with your fiancée to see if you can influence their behavior, or to see if you can soften your stance on the position,” Davis said. “Compromises need to be reached when two parties have two very different opinions on big financial topics.” You will learn a lot about your partner and your relationship when you get into the details of what you will do if someone loses their job, or how much money they think should be spent on vacations, entertainment, or clothing.

    Who can benefit from premarital financial counseling?
    Don’t let the word premarital fool you. Both Collins and Davis believe every couple can benefit from financial counseling. “I have never seen a couple not benefit from having a dedicated and structured conversation around money,” said Collins. 
    Davis pointed out that financial consultation is important any time a couple shares expenses or a living space regardless of the status of the relationship. “Waiting for an engagement to discuss these issues is oftentimes too late to change course if you are truly incompatible with someone financially,” she said. Even if you think you have similar views towards money because you come from similar families, Davis warned that could be a false sense of security. She said you must get into specific hypotheticals with your partner to know you’re really on the same page.

    Source: rawpixel

    How to avoid money issues in your relationship.
    First things first, stop avoiding talking about money. Davis recommended being proactive about discussing money frequently, rather than waiting until you’re in the middle of a financial issue. This, she explained, will help you become more self-aware and realize what triggers you when discussing money. “If you know your own roadmap to having a negative reaction, you can try to stop it before it starts,” Davis said.
    Don’t shy away from uncomfortable conversations. According to Collins and Davis, the following questions are important yet often avoided prior to marriage:

    Will we have a joint account? 
    Are there expectations for us to monitor or hold each other accountable about personal spending? 
    Do your family members have any financial expectations of you?
    Do you like to enjoy money, have it for security, or use it as a status symbol?
    If you were fired or laid off or couldn’t perform your current job, what would you do?  What’s your Plan B?  
    If you plan on having children, how does each person feel about what their role is in raising the children? Will one person primarily perform this function, or will it be a shared role between the two parties?

    Ultimately, it comes down to willingness to communicate and compromise. The earlier you identify and understand your different money languages, the quicker you can work on finding common ground. “The hardest part isn’t identifying differences, it’s actually changing your own default opinion in the face of a different opinion that is the hard work,” Davis explained. “If you are engaged to a person who is willing to do this, then your differences can likely be successfully bridged.” 
    And if these conversations are too difficult on your own, know that you can always bring in a professional. A trained couple’s counselor or premarital financial counselor will help navigate the conversation and close the gap between your different money languages without bias or emotion. They will ensure the conversation is productive and that you walk away with a clear understanding of your financial future before you walk down the aisle.
    As for my coffee time debt discussion with my partner, I’m sure it is the first of many uncomfortable conversations about money. And maybe therein lies the real value in it. After all, life isn’t always comfortable so for a relationship to last, it needs to be built on a foundation of honest, respectful communication, no matter what the topic.  More

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    4 Reasons You Shouldn’t Get Married

    Getting married is a big step—they don’t call it taking the plunge for nothing. The person you choose as a life partner will, in one way or another, affect every aspect of your life: your mental health, your peace of mind, how you get through tragedies and celebrate triumphs, how your children (should you choose to have them) will be raised, and more. The weight of these aspects of your life, not to mention the countless others you’ll share with a partner, makes the advice to “choose wisely” seem like an understatement. Still, the reasons we choose a partner are numerous and complicated. Whether you’re single or in a relationship, you’ve probably heard your fair share of unsolicited marriage advice from the well-intentioned (or sometimes jaded) wedded people in your life. 
    It can be difficult to filter through this advice for nuggets of wisdom, and even more challenging to take an objective look at your own motivations and see them for what they really are. Sometimes, your real intentions are buried a few layers deep, and you need something to gently shake them to the surface for you.
    We turned to relationship experts to identify the most common reasons people choose to get married that can lead to relationship challenges down the road. But this list is 100 percent a guide; the person and reasons you choose for marriage are, ultimately, your choice. The goal is to help you make that choice a little more wisely!

    1. Are you getting married because you don’t want to end up alone?
    For someone who is afraid of ending up alone, I present this counterargument: What is scarier, ending up alone, or choosing to marry the next person who comes along simply because you’re tired of being alone—and they wind up being a terrible match for you? Both Erin Parisi, LMHC, MCAP, a licensed mental health counselor, and Heidi McBain, MA, LMFT, LPC, PMH-C, a licensed marriage and family therapist, said that this is a common concern.
    Try not to let this fear get in the way of enjoying your current season of life or how you value yourself as an individual. The fear of ending up alone is rooted in how you’re judging and valuing yourself, and your value as a person is not determined by who you’re with. Take some time to develop yourself into who you want to be first, then find someone who is excited to be with you because you’re already living your best life.

    2. Do you feel obligated to get married?
    “Once a couple has announced an engagement, news spreads, wedding planning gets into motion, and it can feel like an unstoppable, runaway train. It can be easy to get swept up in excitement at first, and block out any negative, nagging thoughts a person could have,” Parisi said. “Even if a person does start to wonder if they’re making the right choice for themselves, they may feel like saying something would disappoint too many other people.”
    The thought of breaking your spouse-to-be’s heart, disappointing your parents, losing down payments, or feeling embarrassed about retracting an engagement on social media can create enough inner turmoil that pressures you to follow through on a marriage you’re not sure you want just to save face.
    Even before an engagement, obligation can take other forms, like family members telling you “your clock is ticking” or feeling as though you “owe” your significant other a wedding date because you’ve been dating for awhile. Even watching your friends get married can trigger feelings of obligation. 
    “I think that many people feel as though they ‘should’ be getting married when the other people in their friend group are getting married,” Parisi said. Not wanting to be the third or fifth or tenth wheel all the time can affect your reasons for choosing to get married.
    Obligation can also be subtle, such as thinking of marriage as a status symbol, or a point on a made-up timeline that must be checked off. 
    Whatever it is, getting married to prove something to someone else—or even to yourself—can lead you to choose someone you might not have chosen otherwise.

    3. Are you getting married for monetary reasons or financial stability?
    “There are other benefits that come with being married, like financial or healthcare benefits, or being able to follow a partner deployed in the military, that may lead couples to get married before they are otherwise ready to do so,” Parisi explained. 
    The reality is, marrying for reasons like these may cause you to overlook major value or personality differences, stick with someone who doesn’t want the same things out of life as you do, or who doesn’t have the same expectations of marriage as you.  

    4. Are concerns about your age making you want to tie the knot?
    “Plenty of people have an idea of how they want their lives to look at certain ages, and one of the milestones for many people is marriage,” Parisi said. “For someone approaching an age they’ve identified as the age they ‘should’ be married, being married may become more important than who they’re marrying.” 
    Age aside, your own mindset about getting married can also rush you down the aisle. “Feeling ready to get married and not wanting to wait any longer for the ‘right’ person can make you feel like the person you’re with is ‘good enough,’ even though you know you are settling in some important areas to you,” McBain said.

    It can be incredibly difficult to ask ourselves these questions, let alone answer them honestly. That’s because, Parisi said, we’re emotionally invested in our relationships, which means we might not be able to see the red flags that outsiders see.  
    Plus, none of us can see into the future! We all want to hope for the best and believe the future will unfold that way, even with evidence to the contrary. Many of us even believe that marriage will magically fix existing problems, but in many cases, getting married prematurely can make them worse. 
    McBain added, “There are often positive things about the relationship, even though there are negatives, too. It can be hard to figure out if those negatives outweigh the positives. There are usually emotions around not wanting to hurt the other person as well, as you typically care about them on some level at least.”
    But if you’re reading this list and something resonates with you, know that it’s OK if you still want to get married. Only you can decide what’s right for you. Parisi and McBain both recommended counseling, both by yourself as well as with your partner, so that you have a safe space to process these emotions and figure out the best next step for you, for both of you. 
    Parisi recommended that you continue to ask questions: “What would things be like if I didn’t get married right now and/or to this person? If I changed my mind about getting married, how would I communicate that, or how would I handle the responses from other people?” You’ll be able to more objectively assess your situation, so that if you ever decide that you no longer want to be in the relationship, you’ll already know what to do.  
    While thinking through questions like these might not seem like a very romantic idea on the surface, what’s more romantic than staying with someone because you want to, and not because you have to?  More