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      10 Game-Changing Habits to Reach for When You Feel Out of Shape

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      So January 1 came, 2020 ended (finally!), and you set some goals to get healthier this year. But you know how resolutions go: by February or March, your well-intended resolutions will have become a thing of the past. Or perhaps you’ve been hibernating all winter (or all of 2020), and healthy habits were the least of your concerns. No matter how on track you feel now, there will be times when your motivation waivers and workouts fall by wayside. You might even find yourself complaining to your mom or best friend about how you’re out of shape, as if there’s a “shape” that defines whether you’re healthy or not.First of all, let’s rebrand this “in shape” idea to mean your healthiest self, which looks and feels different to everyone. Being in shape is not a number on a scale or even a six-pack of abs. After all, a dress size could never be powerful enough to give you limitless energy or radiant confidence. Instead, being in shape is a way you feel. When you don’t feel in shape (thanks to that aforementioned lack of motivation or, you know, 2020), here are 10 habits to adapt to get back in shape and feel your best. 

      1. Fit in more non-exercise movement
      You don’t need a 60-minute workout session or access to a gym to get in shape. Instead, live a more active lifestyle overall by fitting in non-exercise movement into your routine. Even if you have a typical desk job, there are many ways to move more. For example, walk your dog more often, stand while working, try gardening if you have a yard, clean your house more frequently, walk everywhere you can, dance while cooking or getting ready, stretch while watching TV, and get outside to take conference calls. Change your goal from fitting in workouts to just living less sedentarily. For more ways to fit in movement, click here.

      2. Don’t ignore cravings
      Cravings are not mistakes or punishments, and they’re not there to sabotage your health goals. Cravings are actually one of the ways our bodies try to communicate with us. Plus, if we have a major craving for pizza and force ourselves to eat another boring salad instead, it can lead to bingeing, restrictive eating, and an unhealthy relationship with food. Instead, find alternatives with nutritious whole foods to nourish your body, like dark chocolate squares (for your sweet tooth) and sweet potato fries (for your salty cravings). If that pizza craving strikes again, score a frozen cauliflower crust from Trader Joe’s to top with tomato sauce and organic cheese, or try spaghetti squash in your favorite pasta recipe. For any other craving, check out these recipes to find a healthier alternative. 
       
      3. Make exercise enjoyable
      Maybe you think those always-in-shape women are the rare breed that came out of the womb loving jumping jacks and jogging, and you just happened to miss out on the magic workout-loving genes. But guess what: that isn’t true. You may not innately enjoy exercise, but you can find joy in exercise. For example, try a workout like dance that feels more creative, notice how centered and peaceful you feel after going on runs, or maybe even fall in love with the stability and routine of moving your body every day. Don’t work out because you have to; work out because you want to. Focus on how exercise makes you feel, and if you don’t enjoy HIIT circuits or weight lifting, find a new workout you’ll look forward to. 

      4. Keep a routine
      Getting (and staying) in shape is a series of simple habits. That’s it. Turning healthy practices into habits is helpful because you won’t have to debate whether or not to follow through with each healthy habit; you make like Nike and just do it. If a yoga flow is part of your daily routine, you don’t think about whether or not you should fit it in on a busy day. You’ll prioritize it because it’s a non-negotiable, just like brushing your teeth or scrolling through Instagram (guilty). To build habits, start with something even easier than you think. Even two push-ups a day can turn into 60-minute workouts. Also, designated morning and nighttime routines are crucial for an overall healthy life because they set your entire day up for success.

      5. Utilize your calendar
      Working out takes more than just deciding you’re going to work out. Making a plan and then adding it to your calendar ensures you’re not only setting realistic expectations, but you will follow through on them. When it comes to figuring out a workout routine, begin with what you know will work for you, not with a challenge. You can’t get to five or six workouts a week if you don’t master one, so start with whatever feels doable. Whether it’s Monday morning or Saturday afternoon, find a time that works for you to exercise. Write it on your calendar and treat it like any other work meeting or appointment: show up on time, be prepared, and don’t skip.

      6. Eat more vegetables with every meal
      Hoping to make some diet changes but not sure where to start? Or maybe going clean feels overwhelming because you’re so used to takeout? The answer: don’t worry about changing, transforming, or taking away food groups. Instead, eat more vegetables. Adding veggies can not only make you crave vegetables (yes, really), but it can also subconsciously crowd out processed and sugary foods (totally guilt-free). Do you love eggs for breakfast? Instead of forcing yourself to have a smoothie, add spinach to an omelet or put avocado on top. Do you eat pasta regularly? Throw in some kale and asparagus for nutrients that keep the body healthy without feeling deprived. When you focus on adding in more of the good stuff, you see food as fuel, rather than in categories of “good” or “bad” (and just like bad boys and the cookie jar, we want it more when it’s off-limits).
       

       
      7. Be flexible
      Reality check: there will be times when you’re too tired to work out, or you want to enjoy a glass of wine and an entire box of mac n’ cheese. Maybe you sleep through your alarm and miss a morning workout, or you’re not in the mood for a smoothie. Those times don’t mean you’re out of shape; they mean you’re listening to your body. Have an easy and flexible backup plan so that you don’t give up when your plan doesn’t pan out. If you’re exhausted or busy, go on a walk after dinner or do a yoga flow before bed instead of a workout. Likewise, have a wide range of healthy meal options so that when you’re not in the mood for the meal you had planned, fast food isn’t the only alternative. Have back-ups, be flexible, and listen to your body (even above listening to your workout plan or schedule).
       
      8. Invest in your health
      There’s a reason pricey programs work (even if only temporarily): when people invest money, they’re more likely to stay on track. Try investing in an online subscription, a new pair of leggings, or a pretty yoga mat, and see if your motivation changes. Likewise, invest in healthy produce. Because fresh produce goes bad much quicker than a frozen pizza, you’re more likely to go for a meal incorporating the fruits and veggies, if for no other reason than you don’t want your money to go to waste. Also, think of how you can invest time and energy too; the more you invest in yourself, the more you will become a priority. After all, there’s nothing more worthy of time, energy, or money than your healthiest, happiest self. Invest accordingly. 

      9. Focus on each individual choice
      When it comes to health, we often think we have to be all in or all out. Have you ever thought, “I’ll start eating healthy again on Monday,” or “I’ll work out once this stressful week is over?” Maybe you had a few slices of pizza one night, and your diet spiraled the next few days (might as well eat the whole carton of ice cream and get McDonald’s for breakfast since you already “slipped up,” right?). But all-or-nothing thinking automatically sets us up for failure. Instead of seeing “getting in shape” as a long-term project, focus on each individual choice. You don’t have to wait until the next day, week, or month to start over. In fact, you don’t ever need to “start over.” Some decisions will be out of pleasure (you deserve that slice of pizza!), but those decisions don’t mean anything other than you wanted a slice of pizza, and they shouldn’t impact future decisions.

      10. Change your motivation
      If you’ve skipped workouts for weeks or are ordering takeout more often than you’re cooking, your motivation might not be motivating enough. Reevaluate why you want to get in shape in the first place. “Going to the gym every day” or “running a marathon” are fine resolutions, but you need to look at the bigger picture to stay motivated. Will getting in shape help you live a longer, healthier life? Will running a marathon increase your confidence?
      When you identify the true motivation and find a purpose for staying in shape that has nothing to do with the way you look, healthy habits not only become sustainable, but become enjoyable. You’ll no longer feel like you have to exercise. Instead, you’ll want to exercise because it will make you less stressed throughout the day, or because being active now means you’ll stay healthy as you get older, so you can live a long life with the people you love. Now that’s more motivating than a number on the scale.
       
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      The Best At-Home Valentine’s Day Plans

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      No matter if you’re newly dating, recently single, have been in an LTR relationship for a decade, or if the longest relationship you’ve ever had is with your work wife, Valentine’s Day is historically stressful. Pricey menus, overbooked restaurants, or the shame of being single? No, thank you. And don’t get me started on that awkward phase when you just started seeing each other and aren’t sure if you’re at the buying-presents level or if you should keep it casual (for reference, I started dating my boyfriend around Valentine’s Day years ago. He got me a nice bracelet, and I got him a joke golf ball holder that looked like a pile of poop).It’s true: Valentine’s Day can kind of suck. But not this year! We’ve dealt with a hellish 10+ months and a crazy increase in stress, so we all deserve a little extra love on February 14. No matter what your relationship status says on Facebook, here are the best at-home plans to make your Valentine’s Day stress-free, enjoyable, and special. Overpriced restaurant menus and depressing nights alone need not apply.

      Order a hosting box to upgrade your night in
      If you’re looking to make your night special but don’t have the time (or energy) to figure out how, why not order everything you need straight to your door? Pass the Salt elevates your night in by delivering a box based on your needs and your night. Complete with seasonal cocktail fixings, tablescape accents, conversation-starters to help you reconnect, a playlist to set the mood, and an on-theme movie night rec in case your date night turns into movie night (it always does, right?). The best part? Pass the Salt works with small artisan brands and family-run companies, so not only will your date night in be filled with unique accents and interesting pieces that no one else has, but you’ll feel good about what you buy. Your significant other will be so impressed! 

       
      Have a picnic
      Because what’s more worthy of a romantic holiday than a picnic? If it’s warm where you live, enjoy the weather by spreading a picnic blanket in the backyard or nearby park, and enjoy dinner (and a bottle of wine) sitting under the stars. And if you live by a beach, lake, or forest? Even better. If it’s too cold outside, DIY your own picnic by lying a blanket on the floor in the living room. Make it extra cozy with a lit fire or candles, and enjoy a romantic evening that will feel more special than your average night in. If you’re long-distance, mail your partner candles, order pizza on Postmates (for both of you), and send over a Zoom link so you can have the same experience together from miles away.
       
      Relive one of your favorite trips
      After almost a year of staying at home, Valentine’s Day might feel like just another milestone cooped up at home. The answer? Bring vacation to you. If you had a magnifique trip to France a couple of years ago, look through pictures, play French music, and cook some croque monsieurs. If you were planning on taking a beach trip this year that got canceled, make some piña coladas and put on a sundress. You can also recreate the trip you’ve always wanted to take together: make sushi if you’ve both been dreaming of visiting Japan, or set up a DIY poker table to transport yourselves to Las Vegas. And if you’re in different locations this year, reminiscing about experiences and reliving happy memories will make your Facetime date feel more special. 
       
      Recreate your favorite restaurant or hotel at home
      Do you miss fancy date nights out? Get takeout from your favorite date-night restaurant (bonus points for supporting local businesses), or mix it up by ordering a few different kinds of food for a buffet of all your favorites (eggplant parmesan and spicy tuna rolls? Yes, please!). Light candles and get out a nice table cloth to create a romantic atmosphere. Make it extra special by dressing up in nice clothes or even just spritzing on your nice perfume. You’ll feel like you’re at a fancy restaurant, but without the expensive prices and sometimes weird food (who likes escargot, like really?). Oh, and if you miss romantic sleepovers at hotels, change your sheets, hang up fancy robes in the closet, and leave all distractions outside of the bedroom. 

      Create your own spa experience
      Breakups are never easy, especially when the month of love comes along to remind you. The fix? Put all your energy and love into self-care with an at-home spa experience. First, set the atmosphere. Dim the lights, light candles, diffuse essential oils, turn on relaxing music, and put on a cozy robe. Stock up on all the luxurious products you love, whether it’s a CBD bath bomb or a high-quality hair mask, and get ready for a full day of pampering. Take a bath, indulge in dry brushing or exfoliating, give yourself a facial massage for relaxation and de-puffing, and finish off with a manicure or pedicure in your favorite color. End the night with a glass of champagne or a cup of tea.

      Have breakfast in bed
      Sure, breakfast in bed is typically for mornings, but why not make it a nighttime thing? Breakfast for dinner is always fun (scrambled eggs, anyone?), and eating it in bed (with a mimosa or two) will feel like you’re at a luxurious hotel or on vacation. Trust me, you’ll be thrilled you don’t have to go out for date night when you’re relaxing in pajamas, eating pancakes, and bingeing Sex and the City for five hours straight (without anyone telling you to change the channel). 

      Do all your favorite traditions for yourself
      If you love typically love Valentine’s Day, carry on with all the same traditions. But this year, dedicate the traditions to the most worthy relationship: the one you have with yourself. Buy yourself your favorite flowers, indulge in a fancy box of chocolates, or treat yo’ self to that splurge item you’ve been wanting. Write yourself a love letter, cook your favorite meal, and light some candles for some romantic NSFW time (thank god you don’t need two people to orgasm, am I right?). While it may sound cheesy and feel silly, spending the money, time, and energy on yourself that you would normally spend on someone else will remind you that self-love is truly the best kind.

      DIY a wine and paint night
      Wine and painting classes are all the rage these days, so why not recreate them from the comfort of your own home? Order some cheap canvases and paint supplies online, look up a Youtube video for step-by-step painting, and pour a couple of glasses of wine for your friends. You’ll have a lot of fun, get your creativity on, and maybe even come away with new portraits to hang up in your homes (or you’ll laugh at how bad they turned out, but either way, it will be a great time). 

      Host a tasting
      Since you can’t take a girl’s trip to Napa Valley this year, bring Napa Valley to you. Host a simple wine tasting by sampling a few local wines (#supportlocalbusinesses), or get more detailed with cheese or chocolate pairings. Don’t forget an Insta-worthy cheese board, which is always a crowd-pleaser. And if you want to step up your game, create cards for the titles or origins of each wine, the different notes in each sample, and what foods they pair well with (so bougie). If beer or whiskey is more your friend group’s style, sample a few different types for a DIY flight. Pair with pretzels and beer cheese or takeout from your favorite brewery. This is your important reminder that a box of chocolates pairs well with just about any alcohol. 

      Bring the sports bar to you
      If your group of friends is more the “screw Valentine’s Day” type, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have fun on February 14. Forget the fancy foods and elegant wine; opt for something a little more casual and enjoyable by turning your home into your favorite local sports bar (every friend group has one). Turn on a pre-recorded game, ESPN Sports Center, or any past-season highlights to set the scene. Grab some beers and make (or order) all of your favorite bar appetizers like wings, pizza, or onion rings. If the night breaks out into a game of good old-fashioned beer pong, we’d call you genius. Loungewear attire required. 

      Have a party for one
      Because you don’t need to have company over to have a dinner party, plan a special night in for just you. Hang up string lights, make some mini appetizers, pop the nice champagne, turn on jazz music, and dress up in your favorite dinner-party attire. Why should you dress up your home (and your OOTD) just for other people? After all, celebrating yourself is the best possible occasion to bring out the nice silverware. Oh, and if your idea of a “party” looks more like beer kegs and loud music, why not throw one at home for yourself? A beer keg might be excessive (no judgment, either way), but pour yourself a cold beer, turn on the playlist that makes you want to dance, and snack on your favorite party food. Rager for one, please!

      Movie marathon
      For a special night at home, don’t settle for the same Netflix show you watch every night (Bridgerton can wait until tomorrow). Switch it up by planning a special movie marathon. Watch as many movies as you can get through of your favorite franchise like Harry Potter or Star Wars, or pick a genre you love (’80s teen movies or historical dramas are both classic choices). Get all your favorite movie snacks, put your phone away, and snuggle up in your coziest sweats for a movie marathon. The best part about being solo with no one else to disturb you is that you can fantasize about Mr. Darcy, John Cusack, or Gal Gadot all night long (whatever tickles your fancy). 
       
      Create a self-love night
      Not to sound like a broken record, but the most worthy kind of love is self-love, whether it’s Valentine’s Day or not. Spend February 14 getting to know yourself, wooing yourself, caring for yourself, and prioritizing yourself. Plan out a schedule in advance of all the things you want to do to practice self-love. For example, revisit a childhood hobby, make a playlist of all your favorite songs, create a vision board, make a list of what you love most about yourself, cook an indulgent meal you love, and watch your favorite movie. For some more reflective self-love, try journaling prompts dedicated to getting to know yourself better, or squeeze in as many activities as you can from our Self-Love Challenge. 

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      10 Ways to Upgrade Your Self-Care Routine for 2021

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      It’s no surprise that we love self-care at The Everygirl; we’ve all tried dozens of face masks, perfected the CBD bubble bath, and watched Bridgerton at least three times through (staring at Regé-Jean Page is self-care). We know that caring for yourself is just as important as crushing a work presentation or keeping your home tidy (if not more), and we believe that the most important relationship is the one you have with yourself. But the thing about self-care, and health in general, is that it should always be changing and growing with us. The start of a new year means it’s time to reevaluate our self-care routines and incorporate some much-needed upgrades. Whether you switch up your wellness routine after every new year or the end of 2020 requires some special cleansing, here are 10 ways to upgrade your entire self-care routine in 2021.

      1. Get outside
      So you fit in workouts, skincare, and maybe even meditate regularly. The way to upgrade the routine you already have? Take your self-care outside. Getting some fresh air can have major effects on the mind and body (yes, even when it’s cold). Take your workout outdoors by jogging, going on walks, or doing some lunches and jumping jacks at a local park. If you prefer working out in your living room, you can also take a cup of coffee to your balcony or front yard for a few minutes of quiet meditation in the morning. And if you don’t have time for a full workout or morning meditation? Take walks on your lunch break or sit outside while on conference calls.

      2. Make sexual wellness a part of your routine
      PSA: sexuality is not just the private side of relationships or what we learn about from Sex and the City reruns. Your sexuality should be just as much a part of your self-care routine as a face mask or a bubble bath (and, FYI, can be done simultaneously with both). Whether that means regularly exploring your own body, getting to know what you want (and don’t want), or building sensuality outside of the bedroom through prioritizing pleasure in all areas of your life, sensuality can (and should) be a daily practice. Remember that pleasure is your right, whether that means more pleasurable workouts, food choices, or orgasms, and in 2021, it’s high time we see sex as self-care instead of a dirty word. 

      3. Laugh more often
      “Laughter is the best medicine” is certainly a cliché, but there’s a lot of truth to it. Laughter can have a variety of mental and physical health benefits. Plus, it’s free and doesn’t come with side effects like other medicine (except maybe peeing your pants if you laugh a little too hard. You know what I’m talking about). Incorporate laughter into your routine by surrounding yourself with people who are fun to be around, choosing hilarious comedies for movie nights, and not taking life too seriously. You’ll be amazed at the humor you can find in any circumstance when you remember that the point of life is to enjoy it. 
       
      4. Multitask with movement
      Fitting in a workout is important and necessary for both our mental and physical health, but most of us still end up sitting at a desk for over eight hours a day, workout or not. Our bodies aren’t meant to live sedentarily, so fit in more consistent movement whenever you can by multitasking. For example, do bicep curls while on conference calls or go on a power walk while talking to your mom or a friend. You can also work out while listening to an online class or audiobook for your book club, or do some stretching or jumping jacks while watching TV. Oh, and whenever you’re cooking or getting ready? You know what to do: turn on a bomb playlist and dance.

      5. Take more breaks
      I don’t just mean work breaks. I mean breaks from everything (and yes, that includes self-care practices). Take breaks from Netflix binges by going for a walk or taking a warm bath, take workout breaks by scheduling a rest day, take technology breaks with a tech detox, and even take breaks from that full morning routine you’ve perfected by spending a weekend morning sleeping in, staying in PJs, reading a book, and making pancakes. The goal of self-care practices (and health in general) is not perfection; it’s balance. Nothing should ever feel too strict, regulated, or perfect. It’s time we stop seeing breaks as a weakness or failure, and instead see them as important, necessary, and healthy. Hint: if you’re feeling unmotivated, worn out, exhausted, bored, or tired of any one thing, that’s probably a sign you need a break from it.

      6. Do something “just for fun”
      Take a “fun evaluation” right now: when’s the last time you did anything just for fun? How do you spend your free time alone that isn’t bingeing Netflix? If it’s difficult (or impossible) for you to think of an answer, your very stressful adult life has likely taken precedence over a very important aspect of life: having fun. Enjoyment is not only good for you, but it’s crucial (remember how laughter is the best medicine?). Incorporate regular “playtime” in your life by turning on music and dancing, doing something creative like coloring, or going to your local jungle gym and playing on the monkey bars (bonus points that it doubles as a workout). If you feel silly “playing” or feel unproductive spending time on something “just for fun,” that’s even more reason to. 

      7. Try out non-toxic or natural products
      So you have a go-to candle that instantly relaxes you, a line-up of impressive face masks, and every item you could possibly need for a killer bubble bath. While I commend you for being on top of your self-care game, if you’re looking for a 2021 upgrade, try switching to non-toxic or all-natural products. After all, nutrition is not just about what we put in our bodies; it’s also about what we put on our bodies. Going clean doesn’t have to feel overwhelming, expensive, or wasteful. Whenever you finish a beauty product, candle, or even food, do a little research to find an alternative that’s better for you and better for the planet (bonus points for buying from a small business!). It doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing process. Instead, take baby steps that will lead to big changes. Click here for some clean beauty hacks, and click here for our non-toxic candle guide.  

      8. Set boundaries
      Self-care is about what to do to care for yourself, but it’s also about what not to do. Setting boundaries, whether they’re with work, your family, or in your relationship, should be non-negotiable. Think of boundaries as a shield to protect your energy, mental health, and overall wellness. If your energy is always drained or you notice that other people affect the way you think, you probably need to set (and keep) more boundaries. Set work boundaries by deleting work-related apps off your phone, set social media boundaries by muting accounts that don’t bring you joy, and set boundaries in your relationships by limiting your access to other people when you need time for yourself. 

      9. Put it in your calendar
      Your calendar is probably full of work meetings, doctor’s appointments, and deadlines, instead of workouts, meditations, or downtime. But when you write something on your calendar, that means you’ll prioritize it, show up on time, be prepared, and not skip (unless you reschedule in advance). Why should your self-care be any less important than work deadlines or appointments? Scheduling it into your calendar will not only make sure that you’re making time for it, but will remind you that self-care is just as important as other obligations. If you prefer to have a career-specific calendar, consider getting a planner just for self-care to schedule activities that will recharge your energy. 

      10. Ditch the practices that make you more stressed
      I’ll be honest: even for someone who is #extra with wellness, meditation has always stressed me out. It seems like every expert in the world preaches its benefits, but when I sit down and try to have a few minutes of meditative bliss, thoughts run through my head like I’m doing this wrong, and I can’t stop thinking about my to-do list. I would leave meditation sessions feeling more stressed than before. Yes, it is a practice that requires patience, but it didn’t make me feel at peace, relaxed, or zoned out. You know what does make me feel at peace, relaxed, and zoned out? Going for a walk, coloring, listening to Frank Sinatra, and yes, even watching Real Housewives.
      Maybe one day I’ll start up a love affair with meditation, but until then, I’m going to be doing whatever it is that actually brings me peace, relaxation, and happiness, whether wellness experts swear by it or not. The truth is that adding, doing, or trying all the things that are supposed to be good for us can sometimes just be FOMO disguised as health. With the start of a new year, reevaluate every way you’re spending your time, and get rid of the ones that aren’t truly serving you.

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      8 Acts of Foreplay to Try This Weekend

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      While I never want to yuck anyone’s yum, I’ll fight it to my death that foreplay can be the best part of sex if you get creative. Penetration (or however you define sex) is great and all, but foreplay is what gets you excited for the main event in the first place. There’s no time limit, you can make it entirely catered to your own experience, and it requires you to think outside of the box. If you’re looking to spice things up in the bedroom this year (add that to your New Year’s resolutions!) and try new things, the first place to start is going to be with your foreplay game. To make this foray into foreplay (I’d love to trademark that phrase if anyone knows a lawyer) this year, we’re making it extra easy by giving you a bunch of new ideas you can seriously start this weekend. Whatever you don’t do this weekend, add it to your sex bucket list!

      1. Watch each other undress
      With sex, we often go on autopilot, and we forget to take in every moment, especially if you’ve been together for a long time. Instead, make a note to actually watch each other undress. Don’t touch each other while it’s happening either; make it all about the experience of looking at each other and getting excited just at the thought of how hot you both are. 

      2. Talk dirty
      Instead of actually touching each other, simply tell each other what you want to do. Don’t be afraid to go into detail! To make it extra sexy, don’t wait until you’re in the bedroom. Simply talking about all the dirty, sexy, crazy things you want to do to each other while you’re sitting on the couch keeps things fun and flirty.

      3. Listen to music
      If you don’t already turn up your speakers while you’re having sex, now might be the time to start. Whatever kind of music turns you both on, whether it’s R&B, country, slow songs, or even show tunes (hey, Brittany in Glee singing Britney is beyond sexy), turn it up and use the music as the rhythm of all of your moves. Dance around the kitchen and sing along. Having fun together is sexy! Making a playlist together of your favorite songs to get down to can also be a form of foreplay on its own. 

      4. Play with ice
      Ice is quite possibly the highest ROI on any sex toy. It’s entirely free and has benefits for both partners. It’s a different and unique sensation to play with temperature during sex. Some ideas for adding ice into your foreplay includes in your mouth during kissing, in your mouth during oral sex, rubbing it down your partner’s body, or on you or your partner’s nipples.  If ice is too much for you and you don’t mind getting a little messy, dripping ice cream down your partner’s body (or yours!) can do the trick (and it tastes freaking good!). Be careful of using any foods near the vagina in the penis to avoid infections. 

      5. Go somewhere that reminds you of your relationship
      Go back to your first date spot, where you got engaged, where you said “I love you” for the first time, and more. Being in those special places again can bring you back, mentally and physically, to earlier parts of your relationship. It’ll remind you how far you’ve come as a couple … and if that isn’t just a little sexy to you, I don’t know what is. 

      6. Make a bucket list together
      Sitting down together to come up with everything you want to do this year sexually is the perfect foreplay for the adventurous couple. The items can be as crazy or as tame as you want them (we recommend ideas like having a threesome, talking about sex more, using sex toys, and having multiple orgasms!). Keep this list somewhere where you can go back to it, such as your nightstand, and make it a goal to do one new thing every week. You won’t even know how to choose what to do first!

      7. Send a text
      Although our phones can make us a little less present for sex, they can also be a great tool to arouse both partners. Text your partner exactly what you want to do to them when they get home — and just like the dirty talking exercise, don’t be too afraid of details. You can send it in the morning or just before you know they’re about to come over. They’ll be on their way immediately! Other ideas include texting your partner that you want to have sex (simple, but effective!), all about your favorite sexual experience with them, or something you’re excited to try. If you’re both 18 or older, sending photos in your favorite lingerie can be a fun way to show off exactly what they’re coming home to. (Just make sure this is someone you absolutely trust!) 

      8. Take a shower together
      While your partner’s in the shower, feel free to hop in! Shower sex doesn’t have to be the end goal of this either. Having fun in the water and getting excited for whatever’s to happen outside of the shower is exciting all in itself. However, we’re not against trying to make shower sex work — just don’t hurt yourself!  More

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      How to Have Your Healthiest Year Ever

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      You probably started 2018, 2019, and 2020 vowing it was going to be your healthiest year ever (LOL at the pure innocence of what we thought 2020 was going to be like). You made resolutions with the best intentions, and maybe you even invested in a gym membership or healthy cookbook. But then life gets busy and work gets stressful. Before you know it, you’ve skipped your workout three weeks in a row and are ordering takeout while your cookbook collects dust on the shelf.So why is 2021 going to be different? Read on for 12 tips that will prove this year can be your healthiest year ever, resolutions (and healthy cookbook) or not. The secret is that your healthiest self looks different than my healthiest self; we all need different things to be our best. It’s time we stop thinking there’s only one route to be healthy, and instead, listen to our bodies to achieve what “healthy” means. These tips will get you there. Whether you implement all 12 tips or just a few, by 2022, you’ll be stronger, happier, more confident, and healthier. Read on for the foolproof roadmap to becoming your best self in 2021:

      1. Make one healthy swap every week
      A clean diet doesn’t have to feel so overwhelming. In fact, if it feels hard or unenjoyable, it probably won’t stick. Instead of expecting total transformation, take baby steps and make one healthy swap every week. For example, try spaghetti squash instead of boxed spaghetti in your favorite pasta dish, and next week, swap tortilla chips with sliced jicama to eat with guacamole. Another week, swap your usual pizza with a cauliflower crust or replace half of the rice in your favorite stir-fry recipe with cauliflower rice. Not only will one swap at a time make healthy eating more manageable, but you’ll learn how to make all your favorite meals and go-to recipes with more nutritious options.

      2. Identify the #1 thing holding you back, and then fix it
      You already know to eat more plants, work out more, and decrease sugar intake; knowing how to be healthy isn’t usually the problem. So to be truly healthy, identify what’s holding you back from achieving your health goals. Is it a lack of time, energy, or cravings? Maybe it’s a lack of motivation, or maybe you don’t truly want to give up the habits you know aren’t good for you because they provide emotional comfort. Whatever the reason, identify what’s holding you back from being your healthiest self, and then make a plan to fix it.
      For example, meal prep if the problem is lack of time, or find more nutritious versions of the food you crave. If it’s lack of motivation, rethink your “why” (do you want to adopt healthier habits to feel more confident, live a longer life, or have more energy?), and if bad habits provide emotional comfort, identify the root of the emotional discomfort. Then find alternative methods to relieve stress, anxiety, or boredom in ways that will actually provide a long-term solution.

      3. Go to bed earlier
      Even if your diet fails and you don’t have time to exercise, prioritize sleep over everything because getting enough sleep can affect your overall quality of life. If you have difficulty fitting more sleep into your schedule, start by going to bed five minutes earlier every night until you’ve gained an hour of sleep. If you have difficulty falling asleep, figure out why. Talk to your doctor about improving sleep quality, try adaptogens, or drink chamomile tea and reduce screen time before bed. Going to bed earlier will not only mean more sleep, but it means you can get up earlier for a more productive or relaxing morning routine. 

      4. Prioritize gut health
      There’s a major connection between the gut and the brain, the gut and the immune system, and even the gut and the skin. In other words, prioritizing gut health will give you the biggest bang for your buck. Add fermented foods to your diet (like sauerkraut, miso, or kimchi), eat more fiber, and add prebiotics to meals. More than anything, trust your gut. Pardon the pun, but your body knows what it needs, so pay attention to your body’s reactions: avoid foods that make you feel lethargic or nauseous, and load up on foods that make you feel good. For more ways to improve gut health, click here. 

      5. Set up your environment for success
      You are what you eat, but you are where you live too. Surround yourself with motivating images, start a vision board, or post your mantra on your mirror, desk, or fridge. Whatever is a visual representation of what you want to achieve, seeing your goals as often as possible will keep you motivated. Beyond vision boards and mantras, make sure your home is setting you up for success. Keep your blender in an accessible spot, display healthier cookbooks on the shelves, leave your yoga mat out, and turn your bedroom into a relaxing oasis.

      6. Do something every day that you’re passionate about
      I have a theory (nay, proof!) that afternoon slumps or overall low energy might mean you’re not doing enough that lights a fire in you. To increase your energy and general zest for life (a crucial part of wellness), do more things you’re passionate about. If your job doesn’t get you excited, read a fascinating book on your lunch break, fit in a motivating workout, or spend weekends fighting for a worthy cause. If you’re unsure what you’re passionate about, make a list of events that you look forward to or your greatest talents. What would you invest your time in, even if you weren’t getting paid? What were your favorite hobbies as a little kid? Find ways to fit in those things more consistently. Your energy levels, happiness, and excitement for life will thank you.

      7. Live less sedentarily 
      So you know you need to work out to be healthier, but the healthiest people are active even outside of designated gym time. In addition to your online yoga class or morning jog, focus on living less sedentarily overall by adding more non-exercise movement in your life. For example, walk your dog more often, stand while working, try gardening if you have a yard, clean your house more often, walk everywhere you can, dance while cooking or getting ready, stretch while watching TV, and get outside to take conference calls. For more ways to fit in movement throughout your day (no matter how busy you are), click here. 

      8. Experiment with something new every week
      The secret to achieving your healthiest self might be as simple as making healthy habits feel new. Whether it’s trying a veggie that you’ve never cooked with, taking an online HIIT class when you’re more of a yoga girl, or experimenting with various wellness trends, regularly trying something new can help you become your healthiest self. The purpose is not to fit in every single self-care trend circulating on Instagram (that’s just FOMO disguised as wellness). Instead, the point of experimenting with new things is to find foods, exercises, and products that could really make a difference for you. Plus, trying new things can increase confidence and motivation. 

      9. Put your needs first 
      Do you ever say “yes” when you really want to say “no?” Are you a chronic people-pleaser, or do you waste mental real estate worrying how other people think of you? How often are you disappointing yourself to avoid disappointing other people? To truly be healthy, you have to be OK letting other people down if it means staying true to yourself. Putting your needs first, setting (and keeping) boundaries, and listening to your gut over other people’s advice are some of the most crucial ways to be healthy, but often the most overlooked. Your new 2021 resolution should be to do what you want to do and stay true to who you are. Your healthiest self will follow.

      10. Go on at least one walk every day (or just get outside)
      A simple health goal that could change your life? Go for a walk every single day. Not only is getting your steps up good for your health (your Fitbit will be so proud!) but getting fresh air and sunshine will boost your mood. If you don’t have time to go on a walk, do whatever you can to get fresh air throughout the day: take your laptop out on the balcony or patio for work, make conference calls while walking around the block, or eat your lunch outside (just don’t forget SPF). If it’s too cold to even think about spending time outdoors, open your window for a few minutes of fresh air.

      11. Eat the rainbow (every day)
      No, I’m not talking about Skittles. Plants get their colors from antioxidants, so it only makes sense to eat all the colors to provide your body with all the antioxidants, right? Incorporating reds (tomatoes, apples, red pepper), blues (blueberries, blackberries, blue potatoes), oranges (sweet potato, butternut squash, tangerines), greens (leafy greens, Brussels sprouts, zucchini), yellows (spaghetti squash, bananas, corn) and purples (purple cabbage, eggplant, grapes) is the easiest (and prettiest) way to ensure you’re getting an abundance of phytonutrients and the full spectrum of vitamins, minerals, and amino acids. As an easy hack, try to add at least three different colors to each meal or plan grocery lists to include each color of the rainbow.

      12. If you’re not enjoying it, reevaluate
      Maybe you’re in the mindset that getting healthy is supposed to be hard. After all, we’ve been bombarded with restrictive diets and intensive workouts so often, we might confuse exhaustion or deprivation with health. Maybe you’ve even heard the phrase, “nothing worth having comes easy.” But I’d like to offer you a new idea of health: it doesn’t have to be (and shouldn’t be) difficult to achieve any health goal. When we’re eating nourishing foods and moving our bodies in ways we crave, healthier habits are much more sustainable. It’s also a sign that we’re in tune with what our bodies really need.
      You don’t have to make drastic changes or set strict rules to achieve your healthiest self. Instead, it’s about unlearning what you think you “should” or “shouldn’t” do, and listening to what your body is trying to tell you instead. It might take some time to get there, but listening to your body and giving it what makes it feel best should not only be easy, but enjoyable.

      How are you getting your healthiest this year? More

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      30 At-Home Workouts You Can Do on Your Lunch Break

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      No matter how many times that I attempt to make a conscious effort to slow down and enjoy my food, my hanger always prevails as I continually find myself inhaling my meals. The one benefit to this fatal flaw of mine is that I have the *unique* ability to use my lunch break to accomplish more than just curbing my hunger with my favorite Trader Joe’s Mandarin Orange Chicken Bowl. Instead of sleepily scrolling TikTok as I digest, I use the remaining minutes of my lunch to move my body, even if it’s just for a few moments.For a long, long time, it was ingrained in my brain that my workouts “weren’t effective” unless I spent over an hour doing intense cardio or lifting heavy weights at a gym. After the past year of adapting to our new normal, I’ve found that keeping things short, simple, and consistent is more effective for me than pressuring myself to hit the gym multiple days a week for hours on end. More times than not, I don’t have the time, energy, or motivation to make my previous methods even the least bit successful.
      Incorporating movement into my WFH routine has been an absolute game-changer for me and helps me to get my mind right before I tackle the second half of my workday. Whether you find yourself with an extra 10, 20, or 30 minutes in your day, these quick, yet effective workouts are the perfect way to step away from the screen and get your blood pumping:

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      Use code TEG50 for 50 percent off your first month of Obé Fitness, in addition to the 7-day free trial.

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      The Everygirl’s 28-Day Self-Love Challenge

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      Ah, February: the month of red roses, limitless rom-coms, and heart-shaped boxes of chocolates. Maybe you’re a hopeless romantic and look forward to February 14 all year, or maybe Valentine’s Day typically feels sad, lonely, or disappointing. But celebrating love wouldn’t be complete if the #1 priority wasn’t how you love yourself.No matter what your relationship status says on Facebook, the most important relationship is the one you have with yourself. Yes, that might have been a cliché your mom told you growing up or what you read in The Care and Keeping Of You when you were 11 years old, but it’s also a powerful truth. How you feel about and talk to yourself determines the success of other relationships, and is a key component of physical health and mental health. How you love yourself literally impacts every aspect of your life, and therefore, learning to love yourself is the most important skill you could master. 
      Since February is the month of love, we’ve put together a challenge focusing on the most worthy kind of relationship: the one you have with yourself. For every day in February, you’ll be challenged to try journaling prompts and activities focusing on getting to know yourself, wooing yourself, caring for yourself, and prioritizing yourself. Follow the challenge, and you’ll have a whole new perspective on self-love by March 1. 
       

      1: Make a list of five things that always make you happy and put it on your mirror, desk, or fridge where you’ll see it often
      2: Buy yourself flowers
      3. Revisit a childhood hobby
      4. Go for a walk on your lunch break
      5. Make a playlist of all your favorite songs
      6. Unplug for three hours
      7: Journal prompt: Get to know yourself. Take some time to think about what you believe in, value, and like. Make a list of your strengths (particularly the ones that have gone unnoticed).

      Source: @lolaomonaija

      8: Say “no” if you want to say no
      9: Eat the rainbow by trying a variety of fruits and vegetables
      10: Splurge on the item you’ve been wanting
      11: Take yourself on a date or set the table with candles and a fancy table cloth
      13: Watch your favorite movie
      14: Journal prompt: look at a picture of yourself as a baby or young child. How would you talk differently to yourself if you were talking to her? What do you want to tell her?

      Source: @sassyredlipstick

      15. Identify your love language and then do one thing to show yourself love in that language
      16. Make a promise to yourself and then keep it (work out before work, make a smoothie for breakfast, take a real lunch break, cut off work at 5 p.m., etc.)
      17. Unfollow or mute every account that doesn’t make you feel inspired, encouraged, or good about yourself
      18. Sit in child’s pose for a minute whenever you’re stressed
      19. Dress up in your favorite outfit and put on your favorite lipstick
      20. Take some time to “play:” turn on music and dance or do something creative like coloring
      21: Journal prompt: write down past mistakes you’re still holding onto. Reflect on how you’ve changed since those past mistakes or embarrassing moments. Realize how even the worst moments have made you stronger, kinder, and better, and then forgive yourself. 

      Source: @kayla_seah

      22: Say “thank you” instead of “I’m sorry”
      23: Sneak leafy greens into sauces, dips, and dressings
      24: Write a list of the things you love most about yourself
      25: Start an inspirational book
      26: Treat yourself to a new vibrator or download an app like Coral (because sexual wellness is self-care)

      28: Journal prompt: How can you become more “you?” We love ourselves when our actions align with who we really are. Make a list of your qualities, likes, traits, strengths, and passions. Then, write down how you can become or more of each thing. Also, get rid of the activities or traits that don’t feel true to you, and fill up the empty space with more you-ness. Every work goal, wellness intention, and daily schedule should support becoming more of who you really are. More