How to move from conflict to connection with couples counselling
All couples experience conflict, however in the long run, counseling can help partners address and heal from emotional wounds.
Couples learn how to express their needs and concerns more effectively, fostering better understanding. It provides a safe and structured environment where couples can openly discuss their issues with the guidance of a trained therapist. Common topics addressed in couples counseling include trust issues, communication breakdowns, emotional distance, financial stress, intimacy concerns, and differences in values or life goals.
With Dubai taking a step forward in the world of mental health, The Wellbeing Sanctuary sheds light on various issues through personalized coaching sessions and educational programs. The space fosters a culture of understanding, resilience, and self-care, promoting lasting positive change in the lives of those you serve.
To delve into the concept and how it can work for different couples, Emirates Woman spoke to Sarmistha Mitra, Holistic Health Expert and Founder & CEO of The Wellbeing Sanctuary Training LLC in Dubai on how it works.
Talk us through your background
I am fascinated by the human mind and have been studying the science behind our behavior, habits, disorders, and dysfunctions for more than a decade now. I’ve dedicated myself to exploring and uncovering the mystery of the subconscious mind and how deeply ingrained survival programs affect our conscious decisions. This journey led me to develop DecodeYou®: A Path to Self-Mastery, an approach aimed at liberating humanity from our stories of pain. My personal experiences and deep exploration into the human psyche have shaped this model, allowing individuals to rewrite their subconscious programming. At The Wellbeing Sanctuary, we focus on holistic healing, integrating mind, body, and soul.
What are some of the key workshops offered at The Wellbeing Sanctuary?
The Wellbeing Sanctuary is a KHDA & CMA (Complementary Medical Association) accredited training center. Currently, we offer three certified trainings for professional and personal development, DecodeYou ®, Dream Interpretation & Analysis, & Chakra Diagnosis and Attunement. Additionally, we hold Mental Fitness classes every Wednesday. Our workshops create unique experiences, such as “DecodeYour Relationships,” which helps couples understand the subconscious dynamics in their partnerships. We also offer sessions like “Emotional Mastery,” “Mind-Body Recalibration,” and specialized workshops that focus on trauma healing, generational healing, and self-esteem building. For parents and children, we have “Bonded Bliss,” a meditation program that nurtures deep connection and mindfulness. What sets us apart is our focus on integrating these learnings into practical, everyday life to ensure long-lasting transformation.
What is your therapeutic approach to couples counseling?
In couples counseling, I take a holistic and integrative approach. The program begins with self-discovery, as self-awareness is the key to cultivating a balanced life. This process helps uncover the subconscious survival programs that each partner brings into the relationship. By decoding these patterns, we address the root causes of conflicts, allowing couples to reprogram limiting beliefs and develop healthier, more functional relationship dynamics. I believe that the best time for relationship counseling is during the honeymoon phase, when positivity often blinds couples to early signs of potential issues. Most relationship counselors experience more failed cases than successful ones because people delay therapy until problems become severe. By investing in your relationship early, you’re setting the stage for long-term success and deeper connection. If you’re in this early stage, consider seeking professional support to ensure a strong and lasting bond.
When a disagreement arises between couples, what’s the best advice?
A relationship is not just an intimate companionship; it is the greatest opportunity for spiritual growth and evolution. My advice is to first understand that every disagreement brings an opportunity for growth. Instead of trying to win, ask, “What is this conflict showing us about our deeper needs and survival instincts?” When we approach conflict with curiosity, we uncover what we’ve been denying ourselves or each other. This mindset transforms disagreements into learning moments for both partners, allowing the relationship to evolve in a healthier direction.
How do you handle power imbalances or one partner being more committed than the other?
Power imbalances often stem from one partner unconsciously replaying a survival program that creates control or dependency. I work with couples to identify these imbalances and shift the dynamic by fostering personal responsibility. I believe no one would intentionally hurt the person they care for, which means these acts are often unmindful and projections of deep-rooted issues. The first step is self-awareness, and then I introduce the couple to the subconscious patterns of each other. We explore what threatens one partner in the relationship and how to diffuse that threat through mindful actions and communication. When each partner learns to honor their own boundaries and autonomy, the relationship can regain balance.
How do you help couples improve communication?
I guide couples to communicate from a space of awareness rather than reaction. Teaching them tools to transform their reactions—animalistic in nature—into responses that come from a place of psychological maturity is crucial. When we understand our own emotional triggers and survival mechanisms, we communicate with more clarity and compassion. I emphasize mindful listening, helping couples hear each other’s unspoken needs and fears behind the words. Specific techniques like mirroring and empathetic listening are tools I use to help couples bridge their communication gaps.
What are some of the main problems you’ve noticed with couples in Dubai?
Many couples in Dubai face challenges rooted in ancestral survival programs, particularly around gender roles. Modern women, often stepping into their masculine energy to cope with the demands of life, find themselves becoming providers or decision-makers, which can create imbalances in relationships. On the other hand, men are grappling with the transition from being solely providers to becoming equal partners, struggling to redefine their roles in the face of evolving expectations.
This misalignment often leads to a deeper issue—many couples don’t know what they truly want emotionally. When people are disconnected from their emotional needs, they miscommunicate their desires and expectations. This disconnect leads to disappointment, resentment, and ultimately reactive behaviors such as arguments or avoidance. The DecodeYou® program helps individuals balance these energies and find alignment within their relationships.
Additionally, many couples in Dubai also struggle with balancing individual identity alongside cultural or familial expectations. The fast-paced, high-pressure environment leaves little room for emotional connection, compounding the disconnect. Social media further fuels insecurities and comparisons, leading to unrealistic expectations, misunderstandings, and a sense of dissatisfaction in relationships. My role is to help them realign emotionally, understand their true desires, and foster healthy communication.
How do you measure progress in therapy?
Progress is measured by the couple’s ability to break old patterns, communicate effectively, and resolve conflicts with compassion. I also observe how each partner develops greater self-awareness and takes responsibility for their emotions and reactions. Healing is evident when couples begin to experience deeper intimacy, mutual respect, and a sense of inner peace that radiates outward into the relationship.
What is your view on the role of compromise in relationships?
Compromise is essential, but it must be healthy. Healthy compromise happens when both partners honor their own boundaries while remaining open to each other’s needs. It’s about finding a balance where each person feels respected and valued, rather than giving up a part of themselves to maintain harmony. Recognizing the difference between compromise and self-sacrifice is key to ensuring the relationship remains balanced and fulfilling.
With social media affecting couples in the 21st century, what’s your advice on navigating through this?
Not everything on social media is harmful, but the key lies in our ability to discern what serves us and what doesn’t. This discernment comes from self-awareness. Without it, we can easily get swept up in false realities and adopt unrealistic standards that ultimately lead to dissatisfaction and confusion in our lives. My advice to everyone is simple: take mental fitness and self-awareness as your personal responsibility—not just for your own well-being, but for the collective well-being of those around you. When we are grounded in our own truth, we can engage with social media in a way that enriches, rather than depletes, our lives. Setting healthy boundaries around social media usage and even engaging in regular digital detoxes can help. This self-awareness also helps build a strong foundation of trust and connection, whether in relationships, friendships, or even our larger community.
– For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
Images: Supplied & Feature Image: Instagram @stineehonore More
