Raphael Stevens

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    in health and weelbeing

    I’m a Health Coach and This Is the #1 Goal I’m Focused on This Month

    I love health goals: the only type of books on my nightstand are self-improvement, my step tracker is my best friend, and I even built a career out of helping other people reach them. But as we near the end of the worst year, I don’t know, ever, there’s only one health goal I’m focusing on. You see, no matter what New Year’s resolutions you make or even what feels best for you throughout the year, health is not supposed to be restrictive or definitive. In fact, you’re supposed to change how you take care of your body based on the seasons, years, and what’s going on in your life.Most of us are wrapping up the year with pressure at work, pandemic anxiety, and even stressors about the little, normal things like finding a budget for all the gifts you need to buy or scheduling every social gathering (even if those social gatherings are over Zoom). Add in the sad moments like not being able to hug your grandma, foregoing your favorite yearly traditions, or making a Christmas Eve dinner for one, and it’s easy to start letting stress take over your life. So my only health goal this month? Restoration, relaxation, and stress reduction. After all, I believe the only point of physical health is for mental health; eating nourishing foods and moving our bodies are simply tools to help us live the happiest lives possible. Here’s how I’m rethinking all of my healthy habits in every area of my life to focus on reducing stress:

    Source: @jesskeys_

    With exercise: trying stress-relieving yoga challenges
    Listen, I love a good HIIT class or sculpt session as much as the next girl. But “health” does not mean working out hard every single day; it means finding balance, depending on what your body needs. My body needs stress relief and relaxation this month, and exercise is no exception. Since I still love a good “challenge,” I’m embarking on Obé Fitness’s Yoga Deep Dive as my form of movement. This 15-day program explores yoga’s most foundational practices while helping you gain new tools to improve your flow. It will basically be like taking a mini retreat in between work meetings, so sign me up! Yoga based on stress reduction will help me find balance and grounding through an extremely stressful month, while the “challenge” aspect will keep me focused and motivated to prioritize myself.
    Use promo code “TEG50” to get 50% off your first month of Obé Fitness.

    With diet: eating intuitively 
    Even if you think diet rules like “no sugar” or “no processed food” is healthy for you, restrictions are stressful. Period. While I like to think I’ve ditched outdated food rules years ago, I still stick to a plant-based diet and prefer to feed my body with whole foods from the Earth that make me feel good. The problem with this is that when it’s time for holiday dinners and festive goodies, believing that you need to stick to any one diet or way of eating can cause guilt, and guilt will cause stress.
    Instead of sticking to my plant-based way of eating 24/7, I know that since I nourish my body with fruits and vegetables most of the time, sugar cookies or Christmas Eve fettuccine alfredo won’t do any harm to my body. There’s plenty of room for mindful indulgences, even in a healthy diet. I will consistently check in to identify what my body truly needs: am I feeling sluggish and need some more veggies to nourish, or will I enjoy this slice of pumpkin pie? Forget eating for perfection; I’ll be eating with the #1 priority of self-compassion.

    Source: @gabbywhiten

    With morning and evening routines: making extra time for myself (whatever that means)
    I live for a morning and evening routine. I love a warm cup of lemon water and gratitude journaling in the a.m., and I look forward to evening stretches, skincare, and meditation all day long. However, routines feel more difficult to fit in during the holidays (or any other busy time). My clients often come to me around this time of year, frustrated that they didn’t make time for a morning meditation or that they binged Netflix instead of taking a bath. My answer? The goal of a routine (or any self-care practice) is not to check items that you’re “supposed” to do off of a list. Instead, the goal is to do something that makes you feel good, whatever that looks like to you, and for however long you can.
    Sure, I love an entire hour for a wind-down routine, but some nights, it looks more like five minutes of sitting alone and reading my favorite book before bed without even washing my face. And guess what: that’s OK. In other words, morning and evening routines should not feel like something else to check off your to-do list or another chore on the calendar. Instead, it should feel easy and something to look forward to. Make time for yourself every morning and night, but be OK if what that time looks like changes.

    With work: prioritizing self-compassion and enjoyment
    At this time of year, we’re having end-of-year reviews and setting goals for next year. You probably have a long to-do list of what needs to get done before holiday break or are working long hours to set your business up for success in 2021. I find that I put the most pressure on myself during this season: I want to make myself proud of how the year went, but also want to feel ahead in the new year. While ambition and hard work are great, putting pressure on yourself makes you forget to prioritize yourself. I actually can be more productive and successful overall in my work life if I allow myself to take breaks, am strict with cut-off times, and remember that the point of life is to enjoy it (that means in your career too!). This month, I’m responding to what I can’t accomplish with self-compassion and spending more time on the jobs that don’t even feel like work (like client sessions or writing articles like this one). 

    Source: @kayla_seah

     
    With holiday activities: finding balance between alone time and time with loved ones
    Through seasons of Christmas past, I tried to fit in everything: holiday parties, gift exchanges, happy hours, limitless shopping trips. “Balance” was the last thing on my mind, and “alone time” felt more like a far-off memory than a priority. This year, of course, I am indulging in and enjoying the family traditions (although they look a little different in 2020). However, instead of doing it all, my goal is to find a balance between family time and making time for myself to decompress and relax.
    If you are spending the holidays with family, make sure you’re still fitting in alone time to prioritize yourself. Go on a jog in the morning, take a bath at night, or find any time you can to recharge. If you’re spending the holidays alone, try to schedule a socially-distanced gathering outdoors or a virtual holiday party with your closest friends. Having social events on the calendar will give you something to look forward to, but scheduling it will also ensure you’re spending time with people you love, even if it is virtual or socially distanced. Alone time to prioritize ourselves and time with loved ones to laugh and connect are equally important, so focus on finding the balance of both, depending on what you need more of.

    This post includes a sponsored inclusion of obé, but all of the opinions within are those of The Everygirl editorial board. More

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    in lifestyle and culture

    18 Things That Have Made Our Winter Work-From-Home Days Better

    When we first entered quarantine last spring, I’d have bet a large sum of money and lost that there was no way we’d still be working from home come December. But here we are, and I’ll be honest, I feel like we’re all making the most of it. Being stuck at home in the winter is an entire different ballpark than the killjoy of being stuck inside when it’s sunny and 80 degrees out.But we’d be remiss if we didn’t discuss the couple of items making it way better. Because a cozy day at home *while* you’re working is possible—as long as you have these essentials. 

    Mid-Rise Cozy Faux-Fur Jogger Sweatpants

    I ordered these a couple of weeks ago realizing that I needed to give up the dream that I’ll get dressed every single day for work, especially when it gets freezing. These are a cool fabric and style that make me feel kinda dressed up, but they are also the freaking most comfortable thing I’ve ever put on in my life. I’ve worn them like four days the last week with sweaters, T-shirts, and everything in between. I run very hot, but I moved into an apartment that has minimal heat and poor windows, and I am freezing 24/7, so these have

    Water Sleeping Mask

    On the days I don’t put makeup on, I give my skin some extra TLC—one of the many benefits of being at home all day! The winter weather has taken a toll on my skin, as it has most of us I’m sure, so I’m loading up on moisturizing ingredients to heal my moisture barrier and hydrate as much as possible. It’s an extra self-care step that feels fun to break up the monotony of my days and makes me look forward to something. This mask is meant to be worn while you sleep, but staring at a screen all day writing words over and over is similar enough, and I’ve experienced the same moisture at the end of the day as I do when I sleep with it on. Plus, it’s clear, so I’ve worn on it more than a few Zoom call occasions than I care to admit. Hehe, coworkers! 🙂

    Equilibria
    Daily Drops

    At around 3 p.m. every single day, my anxiety sets in. How on Earth am I supposed to get the 10 tasks still on my list done all before the end of the day? I know I work best in the crunch time, but it doesnt stop my stress from creeping in. Lately as this is starting to really affect my day-to-day health, Ive tried putting my Equilibria Daily Drops in an afternoon glass of decaf tea. It really helps calm me down and has become quite ritualistic. I look forward to it every day!
    Use code THEEVERYGIRL for 20% off your first order at Equilibria!

    Glass Water Bottle with Protective Silicone Sleeve

    I’m not a water person. There have been more than a few days where 9 p.m. rolls around and I realize I haven’t had a sip of H2O literally all day. But ever since I got this Porter water bottle, I’m getting through multiple refills. There’s just something so fun about drinking from it: I love the rolled glass opening that fits my mouth perfectly and the silicone sleeve that is grippy-y and easy to pick up. It’s also dishwasher-safe, so it’s super easy to clean. Honestly, 10/10 would marry Porter.

    MALA THE BRAND
    Fireside Candle

    I find I work best from home when I cultivate a mood. I make sure my work area is tidy. I plug in my Christmas tree. I cue up the fireplace channel on my TV. I throw on a coffee shop sounds video on Youtube. And I light this truly excellent hand-poured soy candle that smells like all your holiday dreams coming true. And it does make the work day feel a bit more fun and festive.

    Simple Modern
    Insulated Tumbler with Straw

    If you’ve been on TikTok even one single time, you’ve likely seen this tumbler that basically went viral this year—and I’m here to tell you the hype is real. I love drinking my water out of this all day long and have it with me no matter which corner of my apartment I’m working in. I got the largest size and it’s upped my water intake by at least double. I can’t wait to drink homemade iced coffee out of this when we go back to the office.

    Barefoot Dreams
    Bouclé Knit Hooded Cardigan

    I am known as being a very cold-running person, and so when I knew that we’d be working from home throughout winter, I wanted to make sure I could maximize my coziness (and warmth) as much as humanly possible. I bought the leopard version of this during the Nordstrom sale, so it was slightly cheaper, but I swear I have gotten my money’s worth already. No matter what I’m wearing (even if it’s a sweatshirt), I throw this on top and lounge in it every single day. It’s so warm without being as bulky as a robe, and truly sparks joy every single time I wrap up in it. It’s definitely a splurge, but if something happened to mine, I’d buy it again.

    Hamilton Beach
    Personal Blender

    I purchased this 14 ounce personal blender years ago, and haven’t used it as much as I have this year working from home. This blender is perfect for a quick smoothie or shake before logging into work. It blends quickly and its compact style allows me to take it to my workspace and drink from there without having to transfer it to another cup. This blender lets me get a quick breakfast in before the day picks up!

    Hydrating Shea Body Butter

    Between working from home during the dry fall and winter season and washing my hands multiple times a day, I have been neglecting my hands and feet, which have been drier than usual. To make sure I infuse some moisture on my skin during the workday, I keep this body butter close to me. It’s thick enough to lock in moisture, especially during the harsh, dry weather, which is a necessity even more now, since it’s easy to neglect skincare while working from home.

    Vertuo Next Light

    There’s just nothing that gets me out of bed like knowing that the cup of coffee (or tea, but in this case coffee) that I’ll drink once I make my way to the kitchen is going to be really good. After tiring of my trusty old affordable machine from years ago, I finally sprung for a Nespresso machine. My morning coffee routine is the best it’s been all year.

    Crate & Barrel
    Long Stem Wine Glass

    So I initially bought these wine glasses for, you know, wine—and while I do use them for that in the evening, I also use them during the day to make my sparkling water, kombucha, or green juice feel more like an ~event~. I miss sipping wine with my friends while out to dinner, so at least I can get the joy of a cute glass while drinking a healthier daytime beverage.

    Mini North Bondi Eau De Parfum

    If you’ve ever smelled any of Ouai’s hair products, you know that they smell AMAZING. I have always loved the scent of their Leave-In Conditioner and wished they would make it in a perfume. BOOM, wishes come true! This year, Ouai launched the most perfect desk-sized fragrances (and the one I love is North Bondi, which is floral and a bit musky). They’re incredibly budget-friendly, so I feel comfortable spraying it on myself every single day. It’s a simple luxury that makes me feel a bit more like my non-pandemic self!

    Capri Blue
    Glam Mini Tin Kit

    I love seasonal fragrances, but sometimes I get tired of burning the same one for too long. I bought this four-pack of Capri Blue scents when they were on super sale a few weeks ago, but the non-sale price isn’t bad either. The set includes the iconic Volcano candle, plus one pumpkin scent and two winter fragrances. My favorite so far has been the pumpkin (the Alpine Juniper is definitely a sweeter greenery scent), but I haven’t even cracked the Frosted Fireside open yet. This is perfect for anyone who likes different rooms to have different scents, or who just wants to mix things up!

    Nomad Noé
    Poet in Hangzhou Candle

    Candles have become one of my work from home must-haves—the more fragrant, the better. This hand-poured candle doesn’t have a winter scent, and that’s what I love most about it. It’s bright and refreshing, and it has notes of my favorite flower: gardenia. Once I light this, the scent fills my entire apartment and acts as a pick me up for my senses.

    Brother Vellies
    Cloud Sock

    Before I hit the purchase button on these socks, they took up a lot of space in my head. I went back and forth on whether I really needed a $30-something pair of socks, and my answer after weeks of questioning was yes. Since we’re in the house 99.9 percent of the time these days, a pair of lavender socks that give back—proceeds from the purchase of the lavender socks fund Brother Vellies’ mask making and food distribution initiative in Kenya—and keep my feet warm while I work is the ultimate win for me.

    Brazil 8 Cup / 34oz French Press Coffee Maker

    At the start of the pandemic, I was using a Moka pot to make an americano each morning until I realized that caffeine might be making my anxiety worse. I have since given up coffee (inserts crying emoji) for herbal tea. Instead of going the tea bag route, I found Aesthete Tea, a QBIPOC-owned tea company that makes an assortment of herbal teas. After trying a couple of teapots that didn’t work well, I saw a YouTube video that showed how to use a french press for loose teas and bought this one. I use it every morning, and I love that making tea has become a part of my morning self-care.

    Hydro Flask
    Water Bottle – Wide Mouth Straw Lid

    Ever since I was a small, red-haired child, I’ve had water on my nightstand, in my backpack, on the table, on the desk, you name it–absolutely everywhere. It drove my mom crazy, but even now I still can’t seem to leave the house, or my couch for that matter, without it. To cut down my use of plastic and the dishwasher, however, I started using my hydro flask as my primary water source while I’m working. It not only holds a lot more H2O than my regular glass, but it also helps me keep track of how much or how little I’ve been drinking during the day.

    New Balance
    Fresh Foam Vongo v4

    Despite what my Netflix account may tell you, the activity that got me through this year the most was walking. I’ve barely missed a day since the pandemic started (while wearing a mask of course!). It’s helped me think, destress, and get my heartrate up a bit, and having a great pair of sneakers has made going for long, daily walks so much easier. These never give me blisters, are always comfortable, and have held up so well!

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    in lifestyle and culture

    Sheikh Mohamed bin Zayed’s proud father moment with his son Sheikh Zayed

    Over the weekend, His Highness Sheikh Mohamed bin Zayed bin Sultan Al Nahyan has been in the United Kingdom.
    The Crown Prince of Abu Dhabi and Deputy Supreme Commander of the UAE Armed Forces met with the UK’s Prime Minister Boris Johnson, as well as His Royal Highness Prince Charles. However, there was a special moment His Highness was also in the country for, to support his son.

    Sheikh Mohamed, along with Sheikh Ammar Bin Humaid Al Nuaimi, the Crown Prince of Ajman attended the graduation of their sons – Sheikh Zayed Bin Mohamed Bin Zayed, and Sheikh Humaid Bin Ammar Al Nuaimi – from the Royal Military College, Sandhurst.
    In was a video that was posted to the Emirates Royal Family Instagram from the event that was particularly heartwarming shows Sheikh Mohamed hurrying towards Sheikh Zayed to give him a congratulatory hug from a proud father.

    Following the event, Sheikh Mohamed also took to Instagram to congratulate all those who graduated from the military college.
    “I was proud to attend the Sovereign’s Parade at the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst, where I met with our Emirati cadets,” he said. “I congratulate all of the cadets from Commissioning Course 201 and I wish them every success in their endeavour to better serve their countries.”
    – For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
    Images: Emirates Royal Family Instagram, Sheikh Mohamed Instagram More

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    Fans are convinced Gigi Hadid’s baby’s name has been revealed

    Since she gave birth three months ago, Gigi Hadid has kept the name of her baby girl under wraps. However, fans are convinced the newborn’s moniker has now been revealed.
    One of Hadid’s best friend’s Taylor Swift dropped her new album over the weekend – much to the surprise of many fans. With the singer being known to leave surprises – or “easter eggs” as she refers to – in many of her songs, fans believe that Swift has revealed the name of baby Hadid-Malik in one of her songs.

    The theory that’s been making the rounds on Twitter is that Hadid and Zayn Malik’s daughter is Dorothea, thanks to a song on Swift’s new Evermore album.

    While you may think this is a farfetched theory, the Grammy Award-winning singer recently did something very similar. On the album, she released earlier this year – Folklore – Swift announced the name of her other good friends’ baby, Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively, which was revealed to be Betty.

    Evermore Theory: Gigi posted a picture with the caption “August, waiting for our girl”. James would wait for August behind the mall. Betty was from his pov and it’s also the name of Blake Lively’s daughter. August is Track 8. Dorothea is Track 8. What if Dorothea is Gigi’s baby?
    — Ocean Blue Swift (@OceanBlueSwift_) December 10, 2020

    Connecting the dots together, fans also noted that just recently Hadid uploaded some throwback photos from when she was pregnant with the caption, “August, waiting for our girl.” On Swift’s Folklore album track number eight is August and on Evermore, the most recent album, track number eight – the sister track to the former – is Dorothea.

    GUYS gigi’s baby’s name is Dorothea! as you all know taylor announced the name of blake’s baby “betty” through folklore!
    gigi posted a picture with caption “august, waiting for our girl” james was waiting august behind the mall.august is track 8, Dorothea is also the 8th track! pic.twitter.com/3J2S14OKlT
    — Taylor Throwbacks ➐ (@ThrowBacTaylor) December 12, 2020

    Further piecing things together, fans on Twitter pointed out that prior to the album release, Swift said in a chat on YouTube that she imagined the character Dorothea going to school with Reynolds and Lively’s children – Betty, James and Inez.
    While it could be considered an outlandish theory, it’s not alien for Swift to do things like this. However, nothing has been commented by Swift nor Hadid, so we’ll just have to wait patiently to see if the supermodel will reveal the name of baby Hadid-Malik in due course.
    – For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
    Images: Gigi Hadid Instagram More

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    Khalid Al Ameri and Salama Mohamed have just given the ultimate wedding gift

    Emirati couple Khalid Al Ameri and Salama Mohamed are two people who love to give back.
    In a recent selfless act, the couple revealed that they would be paying the full amount of the wedding of their nanny who was leaving them to go back to her home country.

    Posting a video to Facebook, Khalid and Salama revealed how important their nanny, Sarah, had been to them for the last six years she had been working for them and had become a part of their family.
    To show their gratitude and thanks, the couple decided to front the cost of her wedding, a gesture which left Sarah in disbelief.

    Khalid and Salama announced the news when they arrived in Downtown Abu Dhabi for Sarah to transfer money home.
    “These people are not only my bosses, they are my friends,” she said. ” I want to say thank you to Salama and Khalid, may God bless you.”
    However, she didn’t quite believe at first that all of the money she had been handed was for her. As the news sunk in, Sarah couldn’t contain her tears or excitement.
    The video has since gone viral on Facebook receiving over 15 million views, over 800,000 reactions and 88,000 shares.
    – For more on luxury lifestyle, news, fashion and beauty follow Emirates Woman on Facebook and Instagram
    Feature image: Khalid Al Ameri  More

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    in beauty and fashion

    My 5 Favorite Pieces in My Wardrobe

     Does anyone else hear the voice of Lizzie Mcguire’s nemesis, Kate Sanders, yelling, “You’re an outfit repeater!” when they go
    The post My 5 Favorite Pieces in My Wardrobe appeared first on The Everygirl. More

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    in health and weelbeing

    A Socially Distanced Trip to the Mountains Showed Me Resting and Resetting Takes More Than Getting Away

    Whenever I feel overworked, overwhelmed, and burnt out, the first thing I do is plan a trip. Traveling has long been my escape, but as we all know, changing scenery has been tricky during the pandemic. After seeing a friend post photos of her trip to Getaway House—a community of socially-distanced cabins 80 miles from Atlanta in Suches, Georgia—I wanted in. I had reached my breaking point, and my anxiety was on at its peak. I just knew escaping for three days was what I needed to reset, especially since the cabin was WiFi-free and the website hinted that cell service could be spotty. To me, that translated to that even if I wanted to work or obsessively check my email, I couldn’t.I packed a few bare necessities and items to induce relaxation like books, a puzzle, sheet masks, a journal, wine, and loads of snacks from Trader Joe’s. If you notice, I didn’t mention my computer. My freelance career has helped me create an unhealthy obsession with work and deadlines, because when I’m not working, I’m not earning an income. Some would call this the scarcity mindset—and they’re right. This mindset has made me a workaholic without any boundaries. Leaving behind my laptop felt like leaving my phone at home. I thought that no WiFi and a boatload of items proven to calm the mind would make relaxing easy.
    Boy, was I wrong.

    On the first day of my trip, I woke up and went for a walk. Truthfully, because it was so quiet, I was afraid that the boogie man or a bear would get me. But since I have lived to tell this tale, you can see I proved my anxiety wrong and made it back to civilization just fine. After my walk, I committed to spending the day reading a book I’d been carrying in my purse for months. But as I read the words on the page, my mind kept wandering. All I could think about were the emails I must be missing, not to mention that I was having social media withdrawals. My need to check-in felt so urgent that I walked for about 20 minutes and held my phone in the air until I got enough service to check my email.

    My relaxing trip was starting to feel like torture. I couldn’t understand why relaxing was so difficult. I mean, shouldn’t it be enough that I took a break? I quickly realized that escaping to new scenery didn’t guarantee relaxation because I don’t make caring for myself in everyday life a priority. Self-care is hard and something to work at daily. A trip can’t change our habits or how we treat ourselves, even if we’re in a space curated for the very reset we so crave.
    By day three, I was finally starting to shake the work and social media FOMO. I didn’t worry about capturing the moments for Instagram, and I felt less anxious about not having access to emails and started to get used to the silence. I recently spoke with my therapist about my daily bad habits of checking emails the moment I open my eyes, and she said something so simple but profound: “This means you’re putting the needs of others above your own and not caring for yourself.” I felt that. For the first time, someone had put into words that my habits were indeed unhealthy and in need of tweaking.

    Do I still sometimes wake up and check my emails? Yup. Do I let the last-minute requests stress me out at times? Yup. However, there is something that has changed. I recognize that my emotional reactions to these things are mine to change, and that I don’t have to say yes to everything that comes my way if it means busting my boundaries. Self-care and relaxation aren’t just about doing something nice for yourself—like a bubble bath, face mask, or a nice meal—it’s about setting boundaries and creating good habits in your day-to-day life so that when you do have an opportunity to take a well-deserved break and change your scenery, you can actually enjoy it without guilt.
    What I’m about to say might be a hot take, but it was an important takeaway from my trip: I don’t have to share every trip I go on—well, at least in real-time. Take photos because you want to, not for likes. I understand what I’m saying could be perceived as coming from a judgmental place, but it’s not. I am learning to adopt this mindset because my work intertwines with social media. I sometimes find it challenging to turn that creative part of me off, but it’s essential.

    Find a way to shift how you relax that works for your lifestyle.

    It’s the little changes to your life that can make a big impact. When I want to relax and notice myself multitasking or mindlessly scrolling social media, I put my phone in another room and allow myself to be in the moment with limited distractions. Find a way to shift how you relax that works for your lifestyle. I promise you, it makes a difference. More